More Alive Than Ever
by NotyourAverageTomboy
Summary: Natalie has always tried to be strong and rely on herself. Her life wasn't all sunshine and rainbows and her older sister depended on her. But when the outbreak comes she finds herself needing to learn how to survive with the help of an unlikely group of people and finds a companion in a certain crossbow wielding redneck who may be more similar to her than she thought. (Daryl/OC)
1. My Apocalypse

**Note: This follows the show. I'll try to add my stuff every now and then but around Chapter 15 it will follow the show's script and plot. So if you get bored with that I understand and won't be offended if you don't continue. However if you do like those types of stories that involves a different POV from an original character who makes a small difference to the story then please feel free to continue reading.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from the Walking Dead series (both TV show and Comics). Just my OC's**

* * *

My Apocalypse

_Pant. Pant. Pant. _

"_Why am I running? What is compelling me to keep going?_" Natalie thought to herself as she was running through the woods.

Her combat boots were breaking the leaves and twigs that were on the ground, alerting her pursuers where she was. The trees were starting to blur as she ran by them, her eyes were watering, her lungs were threatening to collapse from exhaustion, and she no longer felt her feet moving but they were still running away from what was chasing her. She couldn't look back... what she was running from was far too horrifying for her to look at. However, a part of her also wanted to look back. It was beckoning her to stop running and accept that her life was over; there was no reason for her to run anymore if she was going to die a horrible death anyway. But before she could choose to look back or not, she felt a hand grab at her shoulder and she fell forward with her attacker on top of her.

"Ugh! No!" she screamed as she thrashed her body around trying to escape. But it was futile because she was now caught in a tight lock grip. Her arms are pinned down and she is being straddled around her torso. She calmed her breathing knowing that she wasn't going escape.

"_There's no point anymore. I have no reason to avoid it… and I am done fearing death." _She thought to herself.

She took three deep breaths before turning her head to look at her attacker. The white T-shirt was torn and soaked in blood. Its grey skin was mangled and smelled rotten, the long dark brown hair was knotted and stained blood and its eyes that were once big and brown like a deer were now a lifeless milky white. How did she know that they were once brown? Because she had those same eyes that she had inherited from her father. If she didn't know any better she would have thought that it was herself as a monster…but instead she was about to die by the hands of her older sister. Reese let out a hungry snarl as she threw her head down to bite into Natalie's neck.

"FALCO OPEN THE DAMN DOOR!" Natalie woke up from her nightmare to the sound of her landlord Larry banging on her door. She rolled off the couch she was sleeping on and landed on the floor with a loud thud.

"Ah shit!" she swore as she lifted herself off the floor and remembered she was in the shitty little apartment that her sister Reese rented.

Reese must have forgotten to pay her rent if and Larry was here to collect it. And judging by his insistence on shouting their last name he didn't care which sister he got it from. Unfortunately for Natalie, Reese has been gone for at least two days because she was hooking up with her new boyfriend and only god knows where they are and when they would be back. This left her to deal with Larry.

"I'm coming! If you break the damn door I'm not paying for it!" she yelled back as she went to open the door.

Natalie had been living with Reese for about three months in Atlanta after graduating from NYU and couldn't find a stable job in photography to continue living in New York on her own. The only gigs she was able to get was selling a few photos to any newspapers that would pay for them and sometimes got paid to do professional photos for families. Her sister Reese didn't favor any better, she was always unpredictable and would find a job only to quit after a month or two of work. If you could name any job that didn't require a college degree Reese probably had it at one point. So down on their luck the sisters had eagerly (well Reese did anyway) agreed to live together and split the rent so that they could save money for the essentials and for Natalie to pay off student debts.

"What?" She asked opening the door to her obnoxious low-life landlord.

"Oh is that all I get? A what? No how can I help your or how has your day been? Ya'know what, doesn't matter your whore of a sister hasn't paid her part of the rent in months and I'm evicting you now!"

"What are you talking about? Reese told me she had the rent under control. And aren't you supposed to leave an eviction notice before throwing us out?"

"Shows how close you two are! I gave her an eviction notice last week and said that she would have the money by today!"

Natalie was trying to hide her shocked expression. She remembered last week Reese came home late at night with a worried look on her face and when she asked her what was wrong she said that it's being taken care of.

"_Ugh! How could I have been so stupid?" Natalie thought. "I should have been more assertive with her because after that she met Mason her "soul mate" of the week! Anytime she meets a guy she goes off into her own little perfect world with him and forgets all of her problems."_

The worst part about all this was that Natalie just paid some of her loans off and has been waiting for a check from her last job to come in the mail. She was broke and couldn't afford pay him.

"Look I'm sure Reese will be back from work by tonight and we can sort this all out."

"Not falling for that one! How many bartenders at night clubs start their shifts in the morning and end them in the evening? None!" He had her there. And there was no telling if Reese would be coming home at all today.

"However since you seem desperate… I suppose I could collect in other ways" his hand suddenly snaked its way around Natalie's waist and he pulled her in close. It took her less than a second to head-butt him and slam the door in his face locking him out.

"Fuck you!" She shouted "I'll be out by this afternoon!"

She walked backed to the couch not caring that Larry was shouting every swear word in the dictionary behind their door, she was too busy trying to process what just happened and how she is going to deal with it.

* * *

Natalie's POV

"Hey you've reached Reese, I can't pick up the phone now so leave a message and I will call you back!" I heard her perky voicemail on my cellphone.

Honest to god I do love my sister a lot but she drives me crazy with how oblivious she becomes to the world when she meets a new guy who she hits it off with. It wouldn't bother me if she took it slow and had a somewhat normal relationship but instead she always falls head over heels for the guy in less than a week and gets all serious and affectionate with him. But once things cool off after a month or two (on a rare occasion four months) she breaks up with him for a different guy. And now I don't know what's worse. That she's off who knows where with some guy not knowing that we are homeless or that I'm sitting in a diner outside of the city with all the stuff we own packed in Reese's Toyota trying to call and figure out where the hell she was.

"Hey Reese its Nat again, look I didn't want to do this over a voice mail but I'm running out of options." I take a deep breath. "We just got evicted, I have all of our stuff packed in the car and I really don't know what to do. I need your help and you know how much I hate asking for help so please call back. I don't care whether we have to go to a shelter or crash with Mason or some other friend of yours but I really just need my big sister now. I love you and please call or text me as soon as you can." I hang up the phone with a sigh.

I know better than to expect her to call back anytime soon but I'm not sure how long I can stay in this diner. I feel too stressed out to eat anything and the waitress is probably getting tired of me just asking her to refill my water and wants me to actually order something that isn't free. All I really want now is for my sister to walk through the door, sit down in the booth in front of me and tell me that everything is going to be okay. Not that it will happen since she doesn't know where I am or has ever been to this dinner but I can almost picture her walking up to the door with her dark chocolate hair and light brown tips blowing in the wind wearing her favorite Bruce Springsteen T-shirt, ripped jeans and Chuck Taylors. Sometimes I can't remember if she stole my look or if I copied hers, although I retired my converse for boots, never got a nose or eyebrow piercing like she did and my hair is more of a milk chocolate color with some natural blonde highlights. I was broken out of my daydream by a cup of coffee being put right in front of me.

"Oh wait I didn't order anything." I say looking up expecting to see the only waitress that was working here today but was instead surprised to see an elderly looking man with a beard and a bucket hat.

"It's on me. I'm sorry to interrupt you like this but I couldn't help but notice that you seemed down and I couldn't help but want to offer you something to cheer you up. Now if you don't like coffee I would be more than happy to get you some tea or anything else you may like." He said with a genuine smile on his face. I was shocked that this man was being so kind to a complete stranger, I thought that no longer happened in this day in age.

"It's ok, coffee's fine. Thank you… um I'm Natalie." I awkwardly extended my hand out to shake his. A practice that is starting to become outdated among my generation but I figured that this man deserved more than just a thank you. His eyes seemed to light for a bit before he shook my hand.

"It's nice to meet you Natalie. I'm Dale, any chance you keep an old man some company?" As much as I don't feel like talking it would be rude to say no and he seems nice enough. Plus he did buy me a cup of coffee so the least I can do is make small talk.

"Please have a seat. Also I want to apologize ahead of time for not being the best conversationalist, I have not been having the best day." I admitted to him.

"Don't worry about it, now I can't help but notice that you lack a southern accent. Are you passing through here or visiting someone?" He said trying to change the subject instead of asking me what's wrong, something I appreciated at this moment.

"Haha it's that obvious is it? No I'm actually from New York originally but I just moved here a couple of months ago to live with my sister in Atlanta after graduating from NYU."

"Oh you lived in New York City! I remember visiting there years ago with my wife, it's an interesting place and all but I prefer being in my RV camping than living in a city any day."

I giggled at that because he definitely did not look like a city guy. He smiled at me laughing and I could tell that he was one of those people who cared about others no matter who they were, something that is rare to find in people in my experience.

"So that's your RV out there? It actually looks kind of fun from this city girls point of view. I always wanted to travel across the country and build my portfolio of photos. Sadly I'm a long way from paying off student loans to afford to do such a thing."

"Well I can't help but notice that your car is full of a lot of stuff, I kind of thought that you were doing a road trip because I don't usually see cars that full unless there going someplace." He gestured out the window to where my car was parked.

He did have a point, if that wasn't my car I would have guessed that someone was living out of it. If things don't go well today I might have to spend the night in it. I let out a sigh as I thought of how to explain my situation. Even though he seems like he would be totally nice and understanding about it I'm not really the type of person that opens up easily about their life. I'd always felt the need to put up a wall and keep my shit to myself to make myself be independent.

"Right now I'm in between places. I'm actually waiting for my sister to call me about where are going to meet up for the night." I said that as calmly as I could but from the look in his eyes I could tell that he wasn't buying it. He was just about to say something when my phone went off. Speak of the devil herself Reese was finally calling me back. "I'm sorry that's her now. I have to take this outside." I get up from the table and answer the call as I make my way outside.

"Hey I've been trying to reach you all day where are you?"

"Natalie I am so sorry you had to find out about the apartment this way! I swear to God I was going to take care of it once Mason dropped me off!" she said very quickly. Reese always talked very fast when she was upset, even though that usually made me pity her I wasn't having it today.

"Why didn't you tell me about it? We could have worked something out like we usually do and you still haven't answered me about where you are!"

"I was with Mason near Fort Benning; I'm on my way back to Atlanta. We were hanging out with some of his army buddies and the reason I didn't tell you about the rent problem is because I've felt like a failure of a big sister. The club hasn't been having as much business as usual so I lost a lot of money in tips and I've focused on using our money for the essentials like food and our meds…"

"Speaking of meds…" I interrupted her "have you been taking yours because it feels like you have not been making any sense since you answered your phone and you know that if you can't afford to refill them you could borrow some of mine…"

"Natalie that is not the point! OK I haven't been as good with them as I should have but now I want to focus on the bigger problem at hand! We are going to stay at my coworker Miranda's place, her roommate just moved out so we can stay in her room for a couple of days. I'm going to text you the address and meet you there." She said angrily. She always got defensive about her medication but I don't want to argue anymore now that I know she has a plan. We can sort that out later.

"OK I'm at a diner outside of Atlanta now so I'll head back there… look I'm sorry about asking about your meds but I just really hate this situation and you know that I care about you and your health no matter how much we drive each other crazy."

"It's OK. I understand and that's why I love having you, because a sister is a best friend for life."

She has always said that since I can remember and it is true. Even though we are seven years apart we are still very close and similar, some people used to think we were twins as I got more mature looking. Even though she isn't always the most rational thinker I know she always has my back. Whether it was supporting my dreams of photography to scaring off guys who were not getting the hint that I wasn't interested in them she was always there for me.

"Best friends for life. I love you, see you soon." I said as I hung up the phone. I went inside to say goodbye to Dale and thanked him again for the coffee and cheering me up. I left the diner and got on the road back to Atlanta to head for Miranda's place.

* * *

It was getting darker now as I was driving back. I hadn't realized that I had been out for that long but I guess I was too distracted by what has happened today instead of keeping track of time. That reminds me, I haven't heard the news all day. I usually don't like listening to news but I got into the habit of listening to it from my old college roommate who always wanted to stay up to date on what was happening. It turns out I was missing out on a lot of important information.

_This is a reminder that the virus that has broken out a couple weeks ago is appearing to be spreading throughout the entire area and more and more people are being affected by it. We have no idea what it is or what is the cause of it but we are advising people to either stay in their homes or head up to Atlanta where they are setting up refugee centers where food and vaccines will be provided._

Holy shit! This must be serious if they are setting up refugee centers in Atlanta; which means that I'm probably heading right into traffic that is going to take hours for me to even get back into the city. Could this day get any worse! (Why the hell would I say that?) Apparently I spoke to soon because all of a sudden my car engine was starting to sputter. Great… now I have to pull over and check under the hood to see what's wrong. Which is exactly what I did; before I got out I pulled open the glove compartment and pulled out a mini flashlight and a wrench to tighten the bolts that usually came loose in the car.

As I got out I couldn't help but think of how much this reminded of a horror movie. A young woman has her car break down in the middle of nowhere and stupidly gets out of her car to see what's wrong only to get attacked by the serial killer who just happened to have escaped from prison that day. The only difference is that I'm not wearing a revealing outfit (instead I'm wearing a tank top, leather jacket with a hoodie under it, skinny jeans and combat boots.) and I've taken multiple self-defense classes and kick boxing lessons for the past few years. If that doesn't work I'll just knee the groin and hit them over the head with the wrench. Wow, the stuff I say to calm myself down can be downright weird.

Back to the car; so I was right about the screws being loose but that isn't the only problem with it. As I continue to look for the problem I see headlights from my peripheral vision telling me a car is coming my way. At first they slow down a bit but then pass me. I thought that was the end of it but they pulled over a couple of feet ahead of me and turned off their car. I guess they saw I was a woman and figured they should help the girl who is bending over her car with a small flashlight hanging out of her mouth looking like she has no clue what she was doing. Please god if you have any love for me at all they won't be creepy perverts who want to get in my pants. Just be good people like that nice man Dale was.

I heard a car door open and the sound of heavy boots land on the asphalt of the street. From the sound of it he was tall, and possibly on the husky side so it's unlikely that my 5 foot 3 inches will overpower him. But hey, I'm already judging him and for all I know he could be a decent guy.

"Do you need any help there sweet cheeks?" I heard a heavy southern accent ask in a way that did not sound genuine at all. Oh fuck sakes! Can I ever get a break today!

I really didn't want to turn around but I knew that I had to face him eventually. So I took my mini flashlight out of my mouth, took a deep breath, put on my best resting bitch face and turned around.

"There's no need. I'm just replacing my spark plugs and I'm good." I half lied.

It turns out that I do need to replace my spark plugs; they were just in a box in the trunk of my car. Unfortunately instead of leaving he continued walking forward. As he came closer I was able to get a better look at him. I try not to be judgmental but I'm pretty sure if you looked up redneck in the dictionary his picture would be right next it. He was about six feet tall, pale, had his head shaved at the sides but what appeared to be graying sandy hair at the top of his head and beady eyes. He was looking at me with amusement in his eyes.

"Now how does a pretty little thing like you know how to put in spark plugs?" he asked.

Behind him the driver door opened and another guy stepped out. "_Great"_ I thought sarcastically, "_there's two of them". _However the one guy wasn't coming forward. He was just leaning against the truck watching us. Probably didn't want to pull over but captain redneck insisted.

"When you can't afford to buy a decent car and don't want to pay an overcharged mechanic to replace them you learn how to do a few things yourself." He laughed at that.

"Well no matt'a how handy you are with that wrench I don't think we'll be leaving just yet. Gentlemen don't leave pretty girls on the road to fend for themselves right D?" he yelled back to the guy by the truck. He didn't respond, just kept staring with his arms crossed. "Oh don't mind him, he don't talk much. 'Specially around pretty girls. Now how long are ya going to be?"

"I just need to get the spark plugs outta my trunk, wait right there and watch for any oncoming cars will you?" I did not want him anywhere near me. Even though he was only a good amount away from me I still felt he was too close.

"Now it sounds like y'all don't trust me. What have I done to put ya on edge?

"Well it could be I've watched too many horror movies and the girl in my position never turns out okay, I don't even know your name, or it could be the fact that your eyes have had contact with every part of my body except for my eyes so forgive me if I'm a little on edge." I say bravely even though I have no idea where that came from.

I heard what sounded like a combination of a snort and a chuckle and realized that it came from D, the guy by truck. Captain redneck turned his head towards D and gave him what I assumed was a glare because D went quiet after that.

"Well look at that, girl's got spunk. But hey, last time I checked it's not illegal for a man to look at a woman. And the name thing can be settled very easily, I'm Merle, Merle Dixon, and that over there is my baby brother Daryl but I usually call him lil D or Darylina." So they were brothers huh. Well I haven't been able to get a good read on Daryl since he's hiding in the shadow of his truck but so far he doesn't seem at all like his brother.

"I'm Natalie, Natalie Falco."

"Falco? Don't get a lot of Falco's round our parts. What language is that?"

He's probably trying to find out my ethnicity. I get that a lot because it seems like anytime you don't have a last name like Smith, Johnson or Williams people try to figure out what ethnicity you are like it makes a huge difference. I was raised not to care about that stuff, I treat others the way I would treat myself (Well maybe not Merle, but he's being an ass now).

"It's Italian. Means falcon." Might as well give him a little language lesson while I'm at it.

"Italian huh, was your daddy in the mob? If I don't do what you say am I going to end up in the bottom of the river?" He burst out laughing after that. Oh great I'm stranded on the road with a misogynistic bigot.

While he's busy laughing at his not so funny and kind of offensive joke I took the time to walk around to my trunk still clenching my wrench really tight just in case him or his brother try to jump me. I popped open my trunk and started to look for where I keep the spare spark plugs. The only problem is that I have boxes and bags in here that are filled with clothes, books and personal items, and canned foods so I have to shuffle around some things to find them. While I'm looking I could hear the brothers talking in front of the car. Either they are not as quiet as they think they are or they just don't care if I listen in or not.

"Man girl's got a sweet ass but she's got a mouth on her, and not in the fun way either." That was obviously Merle.

"I told you we should have kept going but you wanted go… what was it you said? Oh yeah get some tail." (those may not have been his exact words, his real words were too disgusting for me to think about) That one must be Daryl since I have yet to hear him talk. Turns out I was totally right about him wanting to leave me here.

"Hey don't you start mouthing off to me too! I may not have beaten her senseless but I can still punch you out. Anyway let's leave; she's obviously not going to be giving it up anytime soon. She's probably a rug muncher now that I think of it." Finally! Even though I'm pretty sure he just called me a prude lesbian he was finally going to leave.

"So now you're just going to leave her to possibly get attacked by those geeks because she isn't throwing herself at you for offering to help her for your own needs?"

That's when their conversation started to become hard to hear. So now I'm confused. Daryl, the one who didn't want to pull over now was questioning whether they should leave me and what was that he said about geeks? I had to be afraid of smart people attacking me? Are they going to stab me to death with freshly sharpened pencils that were stored in their pocket protectors? OK I have to not think like that otherwise I'll be on the ground laughing like a lunatic.

At that moment I heard a noise coming from behind me and then a shadow loomed over me. I thought it was one of the Dixon brothers but the build was smaller and it was snarling. There was a horrible smell in the air, kind of like rotting meat. I turned my head around slowly and was met with milky eyes. A scream was stuck in my throat and it was fighting to get out but when I opened my mouth I couldn't say anything. It then flung itself at me with amazing speed and I would have been done for had I not swung my wrench in self-defense.

_Thunk!_

It went right through the skull very easily and blood gushed from its head and lands my face and neck. I'm pretty sure that I was going to throw up as it fell to asphalt. My mind was racing from the adrenaline that was starting to flow through me. I had just killed someone. Oh my god I had just killed someone! That just kept repeating over and over in my head. I heard someone shout something far away but I know that it was one of the brothers just a couple of feet away from me. I looked over towards the woods and realized that there were more of them. My vision is threatening to go black when they descended upon us.

* * *

**Authors Note: HEY! So this is my first ever fanfic and I hope you enjoyed it. I'm starting this story in season one right when the outbreak happens. When it comes to the plot I am mostly going to follow the show but I'm going to add some stuff that is not in the show (Like the time in the camp before Rick got there and hopefully the time in between the end of season 2 and the beginning of season 3).** I**'m going to pair her up with Daryl and their romance is going to be a really slow burn with some sexual tension and teasing because I personally like it when characters develop a friendship or at least learn about each other a bit before starting a romance. I also want to stay faithful to the story when it comes to character development and important plots.**

**I would also like to say that all comments whether they are positive or negative are appreciated. You can also let me know if you like certain parts or if there are areas I can improve on because I want to learn from this experience to improve my writing abilities (tell me if she's a Mary-Sue, someone is out of character, grammar mistakes). **


	2. Cities in Dust

**Hi! I just want to thank all of you have either Favorited or Followed this story. It means so much that there are people who are enjoying this and I can't help but feel so happy and grateful about it. And I also want to thank those who still continue to read it but don't do either of the above because I do the same thing a lot of the time when I read on this site and it doesn't mean anything negative, I just don't want to leave a generic message or I remember the title and description of the story so I always know what to look for. Right now I want to reply to a review.**

**NRIASB: I'm glad that you like the story so far! Also I do have to agree with you about the length. The first chapter was actually supposed to be longer and have some of the stuff in chapter 2 in it as well but for some reason I split it into two and did a lot of rewriting until I just decided to post what I had. I think it's because I'm writing this all on one Microsoft document and then i go and divide them into chapters after I've written all that I can for the day. I was also hesitating posting the story because I'm very nervous when it comes to starting new things and I just told myself to go for it. I'm actually considering taking your advice and going back to add chapters 2 &amp; 3 to chapter 1. And I love what you said about Natalie being a character that's in the middle of a badass and a damsel in distress because that is exactly what I am going for. I want her to grow and get stronger throughout the story but I also don't want her to be completely helpless at the same time. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Walking Dead characters except for my OC's Natalie and Reese**

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Chapter 4

"We gotta go!" I heard Merle yell. The next sounds I heard were gunshots, I guess they had weapons in their truck but that didn't matter at the moment. Right now I needed to focus on the herd of bodies that were coming towards us. The closest to me was a girl dressed in hiking boots, jeans and a t-shirt. The way she was moving looked like she wasn't putting a lot of weight in her legs so it may be easy to knock her over. Once she was near me I aimed a kick at her right knee and she fell over very easily. She was still reaching out to grab at me so I kicked her head until it caved in on her and she stopped moving. Turns out they won't stop trying to get you until you kill them. Next a guy with a backpack came up to me from my left side and was aiming for my throat, this time I did not hesitate as I hit him as hard as I could over the head. As he fell to the ground I could see Merle shooting at some of the others with a gun as he was making his way to the driver's seat of the truck.

"These motherfuckers keep coming! I don't think we can keep going much longer!" He yelled to Daryl who was now shooting arrows from a crossbow at some of the attackers.

As I was turning to see if anymore were near me I felt something grab at my legs and I fell on my back. It was the guy with the backpack, I didn't hit hard enough and he was trying to bite through the thick leather of my boots. When he gave up and tried to climb me I freed my other foot and started kicking him in the head as hard as I could.

One, two, three kicks to the head before he stopped moving. I was trying to get up when I felt something slam me against the side of my car. I put my wrench out in front of me just in time to intercept the bite I was about to see. Luckily he's too stupid and keeps trying to bite through the wrench, however my back is firmly pressed against the back of my car and I can't move unless I want to give him an opening for an attack.

"Daryl come on! It's no use! We gotta go now! Merle kept yelling. At that moment I realized that he and his brother were going to leave me to die. So much for a gentleman never leaves a woman on the side of the road to fend for herself.

I try to knee him in the groin but it has no effect on him. Whatever this thing is it seems to not feel pain at all. He lifts his head up and makes eye contact with me. Those emotionless eyes remind me of the nightmare I had today of Reese. That memory brings chills down my spine and I can't help but worry about what would happen to her if I die here. If my dream was somehow a warning of what is to come then I can't die here. I need to get back to her and keep her safe because if she dies than I don't know how I could live with myself. Before the monster can tear into my flesh an arrow pierces through the back of my attackers head through his eye. He falls to the ground and I feel myself sliding towards the ground as my adrenaline slowly start to run out. But before I can hit the ground I'm grabbed by my arm and lead to the truck.

"Come on! Gotta go before he leaves." I finally come face to face with Daryl but I have no time to notice his features as we run to the truck. It looks like Merle finally got in the cab and was about to gun it to leave. I'm shoved into the truck in between Merle and Daryl as he shuts the door and we drive off. I'm trying to catch my breath as we speed along the road, still processing what just happened. Somehow I went from being harassed by a redneck to being attacked by…

"What the hell were those things?" I said out loud mostly to myself but looked up to see that two sets of eyes were on me. I'm pretty sure I'm missing out on something because they were looking at me like I grew a second head.

"Are you joking right now? Have you not been listening to the news about the outbreak?" Daryl asked. Now that I'm as safe as I can get I finally take a good look at the man who saved my life. He must be several years younger Merle, had brown hair, dark blue eyes and a good amount of muscle on his arms. In my opinion he was the better looking brother but that's not important right now.

"I actually didn't have time to listen to the news until just before my car broke down. And all they said was that a virus was spreading and to either stay inside or head to Atlanta, there was no warning about cannibalistic people trying to kill you!"

"Well I hate to be the bearer of bad news but this ain't no flu outbreak." Merle spoke up "Whatever this is its killing people and bringing them back. But they aren't the same anymore, got no brains in them and all they wanna do is eat people. That's why were heading towards Atlanta, see what they have to offer than figure it out from there." So those people weren't alive. In a way I didn't really kill anyone because they were already dead. It was at that moment I realized just how shallow I had been about my life being hell when I didn't even know that a possible nationwide emergency was happening. I can't help but feel grateful right now that I'm alive even though I am covered in gross blood. I start to try to wipe off what I could off my face when Daryl handed me a rag that looked like it was used more for polishing the motorcycle in the bed of the truck than cleaning skin. I took it and quietly thanked him and started to clean the blood off my face.

"Not that your good or anything but how did you learn to fight like that." Daryl said. It may have been rude but he has a point. I wasn't very graceful out there but I had to do anything to survive.

"I've lived in cities and sketchy neighborhoods most of my life. I took self-defense and kick boxing classes to make sure that if anyone ever tried anything I could fight back. There were a couple of times where they came in handy but I've never been ambushed like that before."

"Well good thing we came along then" Merle interrupted, "a little city girl like you wouldn't last long by yourself out here."

Funny. I thought I was doing an OK job by myself while you were too busy trying to get in your truck and haul your ass as far away as possible. I wanted to say that so badly but I had a feeling that I would be kicked out of the truck and into the hands of those corpses if I say that. Besides I shouldn't be focused on that, I need to make sure Reese is OK. I pull out my cell phone and realize that I have no signal now. Not good but it will probably get stronger as we get closer to Atlanta. I look up to see that Daryl is looking at me, like he's analyzing every move I make and to get a good read on me. I can't help but feel shivers going down my back as those intense blue eyes look at me like I'm an open book and he's reading every thought, feeling and secret I ever had. At that moment, I was glad that Merle started talking because I don't know how much longer I could have taken the intensity of Daryl's stare and I hated feeling like he looking at the parts of me I've tried so hard to keep to myself.

"Why are you holding on to that phone so hard? You got some boy toy you can't wait to run back to an' jump his bones, or is it some dyke you wanna snuggle up with as the world ends. No need to get all shy on ol' Merle here, by the look on your face it's someone special." He says with a giant smirk on his face like he knows everything. I just scoff at his words because he is far from close to being right. Last real boyfriend I had was when I was in New York and even though I tried a couple dates here it was never anything special.

"None of the above actually. I've got an older sister who I'm supposed to meet up with and I have no idea where she is or if she knows about the outbreak either."

"Sister huh? What she like? Is she like you or is she more of obedient girl who doesn't sass off a man?"

"Merle, you're not meeting sister. Besides she can't stand a jackass like you, she'd have you castrated before you could finish telling her to make you a sandwich." This is more or less true. She really can't stand people like Merle and while she has never castrated anyone it hasn't stopped her from threatening to do it and scaring guys off because the look in her eyes made it seem like she meant it.

"So now I know all the women in your family are crazy bitches. Why are the crazy ones usually the ones with the sweet asses and animals in bed?"

Before I could tell him off the truck brakes really fast and I'm flung forward and hit the dashboard. Groaning as I lift myself back in the seat and rub my newly acquired sore ribs I realize that we are now stuck in what looked endless traffic trying to get into the city. I had a feeling that was going to happen once I heard the news announce that refugee centers were being set up in Atlanta. But on a positive note I seem to have a better signal on my phone so I now have a better chance of getting in touch with Reese.

"Hey, could you let me out? I need to try to call my sister and maybe I can see how long we are going to be stuck here?" I asked Daryl. Mostly because I wanted to ignore Merle and part of me didn't know why, I just found the idea of talking to Daryl more appealing than talking to Merle. He was looking at me but this time he was looking down towards my chest area. I had half a mind to call him out on it but then I remember that I had blood on my shirt from when I first got attacked. He opened the door and stepped out.

"Zip up your coat. Don't want to have anyone freaking out thinking you got bit and are turning." So that's how you can become one of those things. I took his advice and zipped my jacket up all the way so that no blood was showing. One of the benefits of the jacket being leather was that the blood didn't soak into it like fabric. I got out of the truck with my feet landing on the edge of the road. As I was walking forward pulling up Reese's number and trying to find the best place for a signal I could feel Daryl's eyes following me. I hit call on Reese's contact info, put the phone up to my ear and turned my head just enough to see that Daryl was leaning against the truck watching me. I don't know why he's taken such an interest in me. Could it be his has one of those knight in shining armor complexes where he feels the need to save a supposed damsel in distress a lot, did he think I was some sort of burden on him and his brother or was he really like Merle and thought that because he saved me I was going to have sex with him or reward him some way? Well whatever it is I'll be out of their hair soon enough.

I scan the area and see some families outside their cars and an RV that looks familiar before the ringing stops.

"Natalie! Don't… _static noise_… Atlanta! It's not safe! Mason said..." the phone was breaking up and I couldn't make out a lot of what she was trying to say.

"Reese I can't hear you! What did Mason say about Atlanta!" that part had me nervous and I was just hoping she was being paranoid. Atlanta is supposed to be safe. She didn't seem to hear a most of what I said because all I heard was crying and more static.

"I'm sorry Nat… I'm so sorry… I'll find you." The phone went dead after that.

"Reese? Reese! Are you still there?" It was no use though the phone went dead. I'm so confused! Why did she change her mind about Atlanta and what did she mean by she'll find me? I'm shaking as I feel someone tap my shoulder. I whipped my head around expecting to see Daryl but instead was greeted by an older but familiar face. It was Dale. I couldn't help but smile and I pulled him into a hug, something that was out of character for me to do to someone I just met but I couldn't help to feel happy to see a familiar friendly face in this messed up situation. He seemed shock at first but quickly returned hug.

"Natalie I thought that was you but had to make sure." We pulled away from the hug but he kept a hand on my shoulder as a comforting gesture to let me know that everything will be OK. "I have to be honest you look like hell. What happened to you?"

"It's a long story that I'll try to explain later but I just got cut off from my sister who was warning me not to go to Atlanta. Do you have any idea why she might say that? Like something was announced on the radio about it not being safe anymore?" he made a strange face that I can't describe and replied.

"Not that I can think of. Right after you left the diner the TV reported the outbreak and all the places that were infected and may become infected so I started to make my way over to Atlanta. On the way I ran into these two sisters, Andrea and Amy, who were having car trouble and picked them up; we've been stuck in this traffic for a long time along with a cop and some of the other families over there." I look over to where he was gesturing. By his RV there were two blondes that I assume were Andrea and Amy. The older one looked like she was trying to keep the younger one calm. A couple of cars ahead there was a guy in a cop outfit with a thin looking brunette who I assume is his wife and a little boy. There is also a family that has an angry-looking husband, a worried looking wife with short graying hair and a little girl who was hanging out with the little boy from the other family. I turn back to face Dale and see that Daryl was now next to the driver's side of the car talking with Merle and would occasionally glance over here. I turn back to Dale and I'm about to ask how long he thinks we'll be stuck when I heard loud engines flying over us.

_BANG! _I turn around and head for the sound. I hear other people running towards it to but I wasn't paying attention to them, I was hoping that what I thought was happening was wrong. When I finally found the source of the sound I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Atlanta was on fire and the helicopters were reason. The bombs were falling from the helicopters and exploding, I could hear screams coming from onlookers but I was just in shock. This must be why Reese told me not to go, she knew it would happen.

"Reese…" I croaked. Tears were running down my face. I know better than to assume she's dead though, she wouldn't have gone to the city if she knew this would happen. It's just now it will be a lot harder to find her without a place to meet up and I don't know how long she will last. Despite being the older sister she has always been the weaker one. Both physically and mentally, she never learned how to defend herself because she always depended on others. Please god let her be with Mason, keep her safe until I can get to her. I turn around walk back toward the road with the others. I see Dale convinced the two blondes wait for me and we all walked up together. I thought I saw Merle and Daryl somewhere in the crowd but now they are nowhere to be found.

When we got up to the highway Dale and the sisters went up to the cop and the others I saw earlier. I hung back a bit because I didn't feel that it was my place to get involved in their conversation. It wasn't until Dale turned around and waved me over that I felt I could approach, but as I started walking forward a hand grabbed my arm a little too tight.

"Where you going darling? You aren't just going to leave without saying goodbye and thanking me and my brother for saving your life."

"I never intended to stay with you guys for too long and I didn't see you for a while, now could you let go? You're grip is a little tight." I say to him as calmly as I can. I really wanted to hit him but I didn't want to make a scene. It turns out I was too late because Dale was coming over with the cop and they were glaring at Merle.

"Sir, I want you to let go of the woman and step back." The cop said with a hand on his gun. Merle wasn't loosening his grip, he had a smirk on his face and a plan must be forming in his head.

"Now officer, let's not start any trouble here. This here is my friend Natalie. We were just having a conversation, nothing to get upset about."

"Then why not let go of her arm." Dale stated. Merle's look started to turn angry and it looked like he was going to say something mean, stupid or offensive (most likely all the above) when Daryl came up behind us with his crossbow in his hand. I was afraid that he was going to aim it at the cop who looked like he was very close to drawing his gun but he didn't raise it. In fact from where I was standing it looked more like he was aiming it at Merle's foot.

"Come on Merle. Don't do anything stupid. Let her go." He whispered to Merle. If I thought Merle couldn't get any angrier I was wrong. He looked absolutely pissed that his own brother was ordering him to do something. I guess Daryl never really stood up to Merle a lot and it probably didn't help that they were being watched by a lot of people. I needed to intervene before this gets out of hand.

"It's OK. It's just a misunderstanding. These two picked me up when my car broke down and offered to give me a ride to Atlanta. When the explosions went off we got separated and Merle is just making sure I'm OK because he promised to make sure I got back in one piece. I was just explaining how Dale was a friend and I'm perfectly safe talking with him." I looked at Merle and was hoping that he was smart enough go along with what I said and let go of my arm. He let go but still had a look of rage in his eyes but they also held a hint of confusion about why I didn't let him get hurt. I walked up to Dale and led him back to the group; the cop still had his eyes on the Dixon brothers as he walked back.

It might seem crazy that I let that asshole off the hook, but now was not the time to act crazy when the rest of the world is going to hell and as much as I hate to admit it but I did owe the brothers for saving me (mostly Daryl but if Merle hadn't stopped to hit on me then I wouldn't have been saved at all).

* * *

**OK that's all for now! I really wanted to get this done sooner but I was struggling from a little bit of writers block and then I also was busy spending time with family and friends. I also have to share my computer with my family so now I'm going to start saving this to a flash drive so I can work on it on another computer when someone else has my laptop (which is the good laptop). **

**For some reason I'm a little afraid that some of the characters are out of character so if you guys agree let me know and leave some suggestions. But other than that I feel pretty good about this chapter because I was afraid of having to do a complete 180 of where I wanted to go but I was able to keep what I wanted. **

**In other news I'm really excited because it has been revealed that the new Silent Hill game titled Silent Hills will have Norman Reedus will be the main character (his character is not only voiced by him modeled to look like him) and it is also going to be directed by Guilermo del Toro and Hideo Kojima. After seeing the game play I got more excited because it looks amazing both in graphics and it's eerie. Ok done fangirling! I just love the Silent Hill games and I have a really good feeling that this is going to be amazing. **

** As always feel free to review. All comments will be accepted and respected regardless if they are positive or negative. **


	3. Safe?

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from the Walking Dead. Just my OC's Natalie and Reese**

* * *

Chapter 3

It turns out that Dale told them about my phone call with my sister. The officer, whose name I learned was Shane, wanted to know what exactly she said and I told them that all she had time to say was not to go to Atlanta because her boyfriend Mason warned her not to. I couldn't get any more details out of her because the reception cut out and that's around the time the explosions happened. I also told them that Mason was with the military and that's probably how he knew what would happen. They looked at me in shock once I was finished and Shane mumbled something as he rubbed his head before he started to speak.

"Well, this just confirms that were on our own now. This thing has gone too far and they are trying to do damage control. This Mason guy probably couldn't handle what they were about to do and probably tried to warn anyone he could in order to spare their lives, if he's smart he's not at his base anymore otherwise he's going to be in for a world of trouble. But right now we need to worry about us and where we are going." He was right, as much as I'm worried about Reese and even a little about Mason I had to look after myself right now if I'm going to find them. The brunette that was next to him spoke up.

"What about setting up camp in the woods? Maybe if we go in far enough we'll be out of sight from them and we'll just take out the few stragglers that come across." I was about to bring up the fact that I got ambushed on the side of the road from those things coming out of the woods when Dale spoke up.

"It's not that bad of an idea but I know a better place we can go. There's a mountain path to quarry nearby, enough space for us and a couple more people here who don't have an idea of where to go. We can go up to the top were it should be safest and in the morning we figure out what to do from there."

"Any room for us two? My lil' bro is a decent enough hunter and I used to be in the army so you'd get a good guard." Merle said as he came up to the group, he must have been eavesdropping. The guys were glaring at him and the older blood muttered something that sounded a lot like "I don't think so." I can't really blame them for not trusting Merle; I was the same way a couple hours ago. Merle could see that he wasn't winning anyone over.

"Hey don't give me those looks. We know how to kill those geeks; we've had to kill a lot of them coming down here from the mountains. Do you really just want one cop around when you end up surrounded by a group of them?" Most of the women stopped glaring taking his words into consideration. In all honesty they didn't look like they had ever been fight before, let alone one where your life was on the line. The guys however were still unsure, the cop looked really insulted by what Merle had said. Dale however turned his eyes on me wondering what I had to say. Sigh, I'm probably going to regret this later but what the hell.

"Look Merle may not look like the most trustworthy guy in the world and he's definitely no knight in shining armor…"

"Hey! You're no princess either, still haven't gotten a thank you from earlier!" he interrupted. I let out a sigh. God he was not making this any easier.

"If you'll let me finish I'm trying to get to the point! However, he has a point about fighting these so called geeks and I do owe them one. When my car broke down and they pulled over to see if I needed any help we were ambushed by a herd of geeks and had to fight them off. Merle's good with a gun and if it weren't for Daryl and his crossbow one of them would have killed me or turned me by now." I saw each one of their faces grow horrified as I told them about the attack.

"My god! Natalie!" Dale said as he put his hand on my shoulder. I turned and gave him a bittersweet smile.

"Don't worry Dale. I was able to hold my own and take down two or three before Daryl had to intervene and make a getaway. But my point is that they do know what they are doing and if there were any two guys I would want by my side when that happens again it would be these two." Even if they are the two biggest pains in the ass I've ever met but that's not important right now. I do owe my life to these redneck brothers and yes I'm probably going to regret it later if the others do agree to let them stay but I'll cross that bridge when I get there.

The others were still silent but now it looked like they were considering taking them in even if they didn't like it. I looked over at Merle and Daryl to find that they were staring at me. They both looked surprised that I'd side with them so I guess they weren't used to people giving them chances or speaking on their behalf. Their lives must have been pretty fucked up if they think that someone that saved wouldn't speak on their behalf. I may have been unfriendly with them but I'm not that cruel. The tension between the group was broken when the cop finally spoke up.

"OK, you two can stay with us if you agree to help get supplies whether it's by hunting or gathering and you also help stand guard against those geeks." The two brothers agreed to that, Merle holding up his hand and swearing (even though it was mostly to mock the cop) and Daryl just nodding his head.

"OK, I'm going to see if there are any others who need would want to go to quarry. Wait here a little bit and we will all go." As he left I couldn't help but notice that he seemed a little new at giving orders. Even though he was trying to remain calm yet assertive at the same time I could tell he was trying to hide the fact that he was nervous and excited that he was playing hero.

* * *

During the time that he was gone I got to know a little bit about the group. The younger blonde was named Amy and she was closest to my age and goes to college in Atlanta. Her sister Andrea was twelve years older than her and they were coming close to ending their road trip when they had car trouble and were rescued by Dale. The brunette with the cop, whose name is Shane Walsh was Lori Grimes and her boy, was named Carl. The other family was Ed, Carol and Sophia Peletier. Sophia mostly hid behind her mom but anytime I would catch her glancing at me I would give her a smile and I eventually got one out of her before Shane came back with more people. When we were heading towards our cars to leave Dale said that I could ride in his RV with him, Andrea and Amy. I took him up on his offer because I didn't feel like being squeezed in between the truck with Daryl and Merle and Andrea said that I could wash up and talk with her and Amy. Merle complained about me leaving him at first but then eventually said that it's probably better to not have three people smelling like sweat and blood in one truck. Daryl had already gone back to the truck when I was telling them about riding with Dale. I didn't take offense to that because I already know that he's not a people person but he also confuses me because one minute he acts all protective of me and then the next he wants to get as far away from me as possible. Part of me thinks this will pass once soon but another part of me is curious about why he's doing this.

"Natalie are you coming?" I hear Amy ask from the RV. Turns out I was so deep in thought I didn't notice that I stopped at the RV to look back at the truck and at the enigma that is known as Daryl Dixon, well that's embarrassing.

"Yeah, sorry it's just been a long day." I stepped into the RV and close the door. Once I got in Dale started it and we started trying to maneuver our way out of traffic and to the outskirts of Atlanta. It may look decent inside but from the way the motor sounds it seems like a miracle it runs.

"Dale, when was the last time you checked the motor on this thing?" I asked with a hint of fear in my voice.

"Before I left the diner Natalie and don't worry about the sound, I take care of the engine regularly."

"By that he means he just puts more duct tape on it and we're good to go." Andrea adds and we all start laughing. I was getting warm so I started to unzip my coat but was stopped when I heard a gasp. I saw the horrified looks on Amy and Andrea's faces and I remembered that I'm covered in geek blood.

"So you really had to fight them, how did you do it?" Andrea asked, her look of fear was gone and curiosity replaced it.

"Well I was actually tightening some screws in my engine when Merle and Daryl showed up. I kept my wrench close to me in case either one of them attacked me. Turns out they weren't the ones I needed to worry about. I have some knowledge of self-defense but I was mostly running on adrenaline when I was defending myself." I saw that Andrea was hanging on my every word but Amy was still looking uncomfortable at my appearance and story. "Then my adrenaline started to run out, one of them got the better of me and Daryl shot him while pulling me to safety." Amy perked up a bit at that part.

"That sounds kind of romantic." I rolled my eyes at that. Daryl being romantic was not something that I could picture.

"Yeah right. Daryl seems more like the kind of guy who would rather face off against a raging bear in the woods than have any form of intimacy with a person." That got a couple more giggles out of the girls and I swore I heard a chuckle come from Dale in the driver's seat. "Although that's actually more preferable than Merle's blabber mouth, oh just warning you guys ahead of time he's pretty perverted but I think he's more of a man of words than action".

Andrea nodded "Good to know, more of a reason to try to stay clear of him. Oh Natalie if you want to clean up you can borrow one of our shirts. Our bags are in the bedroom at the end of the hall."

"Thank you so much, sadly my clothes were left in my broken down car. I'm hoping that tomorrow I can try to go back to see if the geeks are gone, replace the spark plugs and drive it back to camp. I have decent amount of canned and instant food that I'd be willing to share with the group." I get up to head to the back when Dale shouts out.

"Bring that up to Shane tomorrow. If you're going to do that I'd want you to take another person or two to keep you safe."

"OK, I'll bring it up." I yell back as I enter the room. It's what you would expect in this little Winnebago, small but it looked like it had a decent comfy sized bed. There were some duffle bags that were lying against the side of the wall and looked at my options. They had very different styles with Andrea's looking more grown up with a lot of blouses and button ups and Amy had t-shirts with cute patterns and was more girlish. Neither were really my style but I had managed to find a plain black t-shirt that I guess was mostly used as for sleeping. It was kind of baggy and hung a little loose but it felt so much better than my other shirt and maybe Merle won't make so many perverted comments towards me. I walked back out and rejoined Amy and Andrea who looked much more comfortable around me now that I had changed.

"That's a really pretty tattoo you have Natalie." Amy surprised me as she grabbed my right wrist to get a better look and to show Andrea. It was something that I usually kept covered to avoid situations like this but I didn't mind right now. It's actually a nice change from talking about smashing heads in with wrenches. My tattoo was a Celtic Heart*, the heart was red and the entwining triangle was blue.

"Thanks. It was actually a gift for my sixteenth birthday from my sister. She took me out to and we got matching ones on our wrists. She was so excited about getting me my first tattoo because she already had a couple and wanted us to have this one so that we always have a reminder of our connection no matter where we are." I remember when she dragged me into the shop all excited. It made me miss her smile thinking about her but it was also comforting me because that was one of the few birthdays I remember spending with her.

"I wanted us to do the same but Andrea wouldn't let me." Amy said.

"OK there were a few problems with that. One being that you have a low tolerance for pain and another being that no one would take me very seriously as a civil rights attorney with a mermaid tattoo on my ankle." Andrea countered. I couldn't help but giggle at that.

"Sisters, they can be your best friend and sometimes the most overprotective person in your life. You also know you have a decent one if she can be both."

They both went stiff after I said that and I then realized why they felt so uncomfortable after saying that. They are at least a decade apart and they probably aren't as close as they would like to be. They also had different styles based on their clothes with Andrea being more mature and Amy being more youthful and girly. You would think I would know with Reese being seven years older than me but she usually made time for me when she could. She also liked the idea of morphing me into a mini her so she taught me to like her stuff. Instead of signing Disney songs and playing dress up as a kid Reese and I would sing to Nirvana and play video games. Memories of playing The Legend of Zelda and Silent Hill (which gave me nightmares and my mom was upset with Reese every time I woke screaming) with Reese started flowing through my head and I guess they could see I was missing her because Amy grabbed my hand.

"It's OK Natalie. I know you'll find her. It's like you said about sisters being overprotective, you both won't stop until you are reunited." Amy gave a small smile and I could see that she that she meant it, and although Andrea nodded her head I could see she was less skeptical. But that didn't matter; I needed to believe that I would find Reese in order to keep strong. As long as I don't know where she is or if she's alive I cannot lose hope.

* * *

I haven't been out of the city too much since I arrived here so I had no idea how beautiful it was out here. When I finally got out of the RV we were at a nice clearing that was surrounded by the woods and down below was the quarry that had a beautiful lake, it probably looks much nicer in the morning with the natural light enhancing everything. It made me wish that I had my camera but sadly that was left in my abandoned car with the geeks (I've taken to using the Dixon brothers name for them) along with my other possessions. I really miss my car right now as I'm handed a sleeping bag from Dale for the night.

"I wish I could give you more but I don't have much room in the RV for a lot of people to sleep and I only had one tent and a couple of sleeping bags." When we first arrived Shane and the guys checked the area to make sure it was safe enough. That's when I met T-Dog, Jacqui, and the Morales's. After it was deemed safe enough for the night we tried to set up camp, Lori Grimes had two tents so that her, Carl and Shane were in one and the Peletier family were in the other. The Morales family didn't have one so Dale offered them a spare he had because he Amy and Andrea were sleeping in the RV. That left the rest of us to either sleep in our cars or on the ground.

"It's really OK Dale, you've done enough for me already. The Morales family needs it more than I do and what's one night on the ground when I'm going to get my car back tomorrow?"

"I know you have your heart set on getting your car back but you still should see if anyone would be willing to go with you. It may be a lost cause and some people are going to look for supplies at that hunting shop down the road, with any luck they will have more tents."

"I get what you are saying Dale, but something you need to learn about me is that I'm very stubborn and won't stop once my mind is set on something."

"I had a feeling you would say something like that, but I just want you to be safe. We've all been through a lot and I don't want there to be any more problems unless there inevitable."

"You're going to be the dad of the group aren't you?" We both laughed at that. "Well goodnight Dale."

"Night Natalie, oh and try to stay close to the RV. I'm not concerned about the others but it would make me feel better if you stayed away from the truck." Said truck he was talking about was where the Dixons were camped out close to the woods and the road that lead up to the camp, they claimed they were taking the first watch then Shane would take over after them.

"Don't worry Dale, just because they saved my life it doesn't mean we are automatically best friends and can't be separated unless you have a crowbar. I'm just going to be civil if I do have to interact with them."

"Well that helps me feel better. I hate to judge people but I just don't feel that comfortable with a young girl, sorry I mean woman, being around them no matter how well you can take of yourself. Don't worry this won't last forever, just until we get to know them better."

"OK, thanks for having my back." I turn and walk to a spot that's close enough to the RV for Dale's sake but still far enough away from the other tents so that I had privacy.

I spread out the sleeping bag and lie down on top of it but I know that I'm not going to be falling asleep anytime soon. There are too many thoughts going through my head. Memories of what happened today. From getting evicted all the way to seeing Atlanta bombed. Funny, how little the eviction matters now when earlier it was one of the worse problems I was facing. Yeah I had even worse problems in the past that I think about occasionally but I always seem to forget those when I'm in the moment of something. Wow, this is depressing. I should do what my nonna** would tell me she would do anytime she got sad and couldn't get out of it, think of all the good things that can come out of the situation. It seems kind of impossible that there are any but I could try. Well I don't have to pay rent tomorrow, I can take a break from looking for employment… what else? Not that I was obsessed with it but I don't have to worry about my appearance if I'm sleeping in the woods for a while. Little by little these things are helping me, sure they are shallow but I don't care right now. All I want is a dreamless sleep so that I can wake up, get my car and think of a plan to find Reese. However the mosquitoes decided that I was there new all you can eat buffet. _Smack!_ Well shit, that's going to leave a mark on my neck.

* * *

Third person POV

Merle and Daryl had just got back to their truck were they decided to camp for the night and keep watch for any trespassers. Merle was trying to find a way to get his tent out of the trunk because it was pinned under his bike, to which Daryl just smirking thinking about how he told him that was a bad idea but Merle wouldn't listen. He was now adjusting his crossbow and counting how many arrows he had left. He cursed when saw that he was running low because of the last incident, he'd have to be careful for a while until he could go to the hunting store someone mentioned along the way. His ears perked up when he heard Natalie and Dale talking some distance behind him. Daryl was so used to hunting and tracking that all of his senses were heightened and he could hear from great distances.

"…what's one night on the ground when I'm going to get my car back tomorrow?" the feminine sounding voice obviously belonged to Natalie.

"I know you have your heart set on getting your car back but you still should see if anyone would be willing to go with you. It may be a lost cause..."

_So the crazy bitch wanted to get her car back_? Daryl thought. It was like she had a death wish. However if she could manage to convince some people to go with her he could probably tag along and see how many arrows he could salvage from the corpses. He didn't feel the need to look after her anymore. He got her out and now she could take care of herself for all he cared. It actually seems like out of most of the women in the group she was the one who could her defend herself the most, she just needed to practice more and get a better weapon than a wrench (which she dropped after he saved her).

"…try to stay close to the RV. I'm not concerned about the others but it would make me feel better if you stayed away from the truck." He heard the old man say. Daryl didn't expect them to pull out a welcome mat when they were told they could stay but it didn't stop him from rolling his eyes at what the old man said. Yeah they were rednecks, they didn't look or act like gentlemen and they didn't have good backgrounds either. Merle just got released from prison a while back but they weren't savages. They weren't going to slaughter the men in their sleep and rape the women; they just needed a place to stay for the night. The only thing Merle is hoping to do is maybe get laid by one of the women here and rob the place before they go (something Daryl was trying to slowly talk him out of).

"… just because they saved my life it doesn't mean we are automatically best friends... I'm just going to be civil if I do have to interact with them."

_Well at least someone has some common sense._ Daryl thought. Natalie was different from most women he met. He was used to the whores that Merle brought around, they usually just said and did whatever Merle wanted them to do and then left after they got paid with cash or drugs. Sometimes they would hit on Daryl looking for another job but he would mostly blow them off. He didn't want his brothers sloppy seconds and he didn't feel like it was worth it to pay for sex that's probably going to give you the clap. The other type of women he was used to were the ones that acted all good and wore their best dress to Sunday mass but they were just hiding the fact that they secretly fantasied about men like him despite their warnings from their fathers and husbands. Natalie however wasn't like any of those girls. She speaks her mind, tries to take care of herself, confident and from what Daryl observed she seemed to feel uncomfortable with the idea of a man helping her.

"Well, I'm not getting the tent out tonight. But it doesn't matter, well just sleep on the ground and I pull my bike out tomorrow to get it." Merle finally spoke after giving up what he was doing. He saw that Daryl was listening to something and looked back to see Natalie walking away from Dale.

"Eaves dropping little D? They saying anything good or is it the old don't go around them Dixon boys shit again?"

"Mostly the same ol shit again." Daryl admitted.

"Still can't believe the girl was able to convince them to let us stay. One minute she's mouthing me off then the next she's practically beggin for her saviors to stay. There just may be a chance ol Merle gets a little something from her after all." Daryl was rolling his eyes at that. His brother was always clueless whenever it came to sex.

"Really? Cuz from where I was it seemed like she just felt like she had to say it so she wouldn't be burdened with not returning the favor to us and basically pimped us out to be watchdogs and hunters for the group."

"Oh come on Daryl lighten up. She hated my guts at first but now she's ok with sharing a camp with me. Who are you to say that she won't eventually change her mind and want some of this." He gestured to himself. "Besides her options are limited when it comes men. Two of them are married and she seems like the kind of girl who'd want a fling with no drama, doubt the old guy can get it up, the cop seems to have his eyes on that brunette with the kid. The only others I'd have to worry about are the Negro and you… you're not interested are you? Cuz you were the one that risked your ass to get her when I said to leave her. You also threatened me when I had my hand round her arm."

"I'm not!" Daryl snapped at him. "The girl's more trouble than she's worth, I only saved her because we went through the trouble of pulling over to help her." That wasn't the only reason he saved her. He couldn't admit it to his brother but there was something inside him that couldn't deal with the idea of leaving someone to die.

"OK no need to get snippy at me Darylina. Just wondering if you were interested, you're not switching sides on me are you bro? Cuz I can't remember the last time you got any puss from a girl?"

"Nothing like that Merle! Right now the first thing on my mind is surviving and the last thing is getting laid, something you should consider."

"Whatever, look I'm going to go get my fix." He pulled something out of his motorcycle. _Of course he's going to go get high. Damn fucker thinks he's invincible. _Daryl thought as Merle went off. Merle may be a pain in the ass but he was family and the only person Daryl had left in his life. It didn't matter if he was an obnoxious loudmouth druggie, Daryl would follow Merle anywhere he went because he didn't know what else to do.

Daryl sat on the hood of the trunk and took a look around the camp. Most of the people were either in their tents or in their cars sleeping. There were only four people out that he could see. One was the husband of the short haired woman, he was smoking a cigarette with that pissed off look he constantly had on his face. There was something about him that reminded Daryl of his own father but he pushed that thought out his mind as he moved on to the next pair in his line of vision. It was the two other people that Shane rounded up, the dark skinned man and woman. They were talking quietly and Daryl grew bored of watching them. The last person Daryl looked at was Natalie on her sleeping bag. She obviously wasn't sleeping because she kept moving from her back to her side and would occasionally hit what he assumed was a mosquito biting at her. She seems like the kind of girl that had never gone camping in her life.

As he watched her he couldn't help but think about what Merle said. What was his interest with Natalie? Well one thing he knew for sure was that it wasn't for any of the reasons Merle thought. Daryl wasn't the kind of guy to have feelings for a girl he just met, he hates opening up to people. No, it wasn't because he wanted her; there was just something about her. It was in her eyes; they constantly changed and confused him. Not change in color but change in emotion. When they first met her they were cautious and defensive, her words sounded tough but there was also a hint of fear. As he was shooting geeks and saw her pinned against the car he wasn't listening to his brother threatening to leave if he didn't get in the truck. All he saw was the fire in her eyes. A combination of fear and the determination to live, it was a look he knew well because he used to have that look anytime his father came after him. Then during the ride to Atlanta he noticed that there was a mixture of emotion. Fear, relief, confusion, and hope but those weren't the ones he was most interested in. When she couldn't contact her sister and when she saw the city burned there were moments were they were completely blank of emotion. She looked caught up in her own thoughts and memories that were best left not thought about. She looked broken, almost lifeless and anytime she caught someone looking at her like it she would snap herself out of it and become more guarded. This told him that she has been dealing with this for a long time. She had her demons that she was trying so desperately to hide and ignore, she probably doesn't even realize the amount she has. Daryl would never admit it, but the reason he took an interest in her and saved her was more than just because it was the right thing to do. It was because a part of him recognized himself in her and now he wanted nothing more than to avoid her. But you don't always get what you want.

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**Authors note: Hi guys! I'm pretty proud of this chapter because I'm trying to make each story longer than how I used to write them so sadly while that means I'm not uploading every day I am giving more than I would normally. I have a pretty decent idea so far of how it's going to go up to season 3. Oh I feel like you guys should know something, I only just got into Walking Dead this month after binge watching all three seasons on Netflix so I still haven't seen season four and I'm trying to avoid spoilers for it until it comes out on Netflix or I might just cave and look up the episodes online. I'm not worried about my story catching up to the where I left off with the show it's just that I'm wondering if certain plots will be affected and need to be changed once I do finally watch season 4.**

**On another note I'd like to thank all you who have favorited and/or followed this story since I have last uploaded. I always get happy when I get an alert that some has liked/favorited or reviewed :)**

***Natalie's Celtic Heart tattoo: images1. **

****Nonna: Italian for Grandma.**

**Guest: I'm glad that you love my OC and story! It really means a lot when people like my story and especially my OC's because I love creating characters and developing them to be strong yet still be realistic and believable. Thank you for easing my worries about keeping characters in character and yes I am going to take the romance slow and build it up to and throughout season 3 giving both Daryl and Natalie time to grow and get to know each other and develop ties with the group (plus I'm not one for those love at first sight stories, nothing against them but they just aren't for me). And your right about Daryl being super immature and awkward with his emotions, that's why I want him to be confused about what he thinks of Natalie and trying to avoid confronting those thoughts. I'm also excited about Natalie interacting with everyone else at the camp (I haven't written Glenn in yet for a reason, but I am excited for when he shows up.)**


	4. New Day

**As always I do not own any of the Walking Dead Characters. Just my OC Natalie. But if I had to own just two of them I would probably pick Daryl and season one Glenn, those are my two favorites.**

Chapter 4

Natalie's POV

Well my back hurts, I didn't get any sleep last night, my hair is all tangled and I feel like my arms and neck are covered in mosquito bites, but I'm alive so I shouldn't be complaining. As I crack my back I look around the camp to see that almost everyone was up. The women were around the camp talking and going through cans of food probably trying to see how long they would last and the men were huddled around Shane probably going over plans of where they can try to gather supplies. The Dixons were nowhere to be seen but I know they didn't leave because their truck is still there. I decide to walk over to the girls who were feeding the kids. "Morning everyone." They looked up at me with smiles and I heard some giggles come from the kids and from Amy who was saying sorry every time she laughed. I'm really glad I don't have a mirror because right now I must look horrible with my long thick hair being exposed to the humidity and I have red bumps all over that I really wanted to itch.

"You kids may be laughing now but just remember when you grow up you won't wake up looking cute anymore either." I joked. They still were laughing at how I looked when Lori handed me a hair tie. I thanked her and started to put my hair in a messy bun, so long as it wasn't clinging to my face right now I didn't care how it looked. "So what's going on right now?"

"Well we have handed out canned fruit or beans for breakfast, the guys are over there trying to decide who's going out to look for supplies and the brothers are out doing god knows what. Peaches or beans?" Lori asks me.

"Peaches." I say and she hands me an already opened can and a spoon. "How much do we have left?" I asked before I started eating, man I was glad that I had a choice between this or beans. By the look on their faces it looked like it wasn't good news. I guess with all the people we have now it was going to go pretty fast if we needed to eat at least three times a day and we needed to make sure the kids didn't go hungry. Miranda Morales told the kids to that they could go play but to stay in sight. Jacqui was the one who eventually spoke up.

"We have enough for a few days. I think Dale said earlier he had fishing poles and there is a boat in the quarry that could be used to go fishing. There has actually been talk about heading to Atlanta in a couple of days to see what's left." I don't much about fishing but from what I heard on TV it seemed like it was mostly about luck with some knowledge of bait and where they would be biting. I can't picture that one day we get lucky and have a boat full of them to feed all of us. As for Atlanta I thought it was pretty much done for based on what we saw last night but I guess you can't help but wonder what's left of it.

"Well it may not seem like much of an offer but I was going to see if anyone would take me to go get my car. All I need to do is replace the spark plugs and it's packed with stuff because I was moving. My sister and I were pretty thrifty when it came to food so we would always go to those warehouse stores that sold value sized products. We have a lot of cans of soups, beans, lasagna and fruit. I even have granola and protein bars we could give to the kids for snacks to hold them over between meals."

"I don't see any reason not to. We should be taking all we can get." Amy said. Andrea however had to bring her down.

"Yeah except that last time Natalie was there she was attacked and if they aren't there who knows if someone drove by and decided to take her stuff." She did have a point; my car was just abandoned with the trunk open and the keys in the ignition. It was probably a lost cause like Dale said last night but that didn't mean I couldn't try to check it out.

"Hey you think they'd let me go to out with them look for supplies? Or is it mostly just a guy's only job?" If all goes well maybe I can find a weapon to protect myself.

"You'd have to ask Shane, there over there now looking at a map of the area trying to see where there are places to check out." Lori spoke. I don't know Lori really well but I feel like she was one of those housewives who felt that it was a man's job to provide while it was a woman's job to care for the home. Not that I had anything against that it's just that I believe that the work can be shared equally. A woman can do what a man can do and vice versa.

"I'll go with you, I want to do what I can to help to." Jacqui said. Andrea looked like she wanted to come but her sister Amy gave her a look that said she would prefer it if they stayed together. It was probably for the best because they probably haven't gotten a chance to really talk since the outbreak yesterday and if I were Amy I would be reluctant to let Reese out of my sight right now.

"Sounds good let's go." We walked toward the guys who were hovering over the map. Shane was talking and pointing out places when he saw us walking over and stopped. The others noticed and turned their heads toward us wondering why we were here.

"So we were wondering if we could volunteer to go out and gather stuff. I remember Dale saying that there was a hunting store close by?"

"There is." Shane said and gestured for us to come forward to look at the map. Well this was easier than I thought it would be but I guess in this situation you take whatever help you can get. The one person who didn't look at all pleased we were there was Ed, but so far he never seemed to look very pleased.

"It's down the road and a couple of miles south, we were thinking of sending T-dog, Ed, and Morales but if you two want to go than Morales will drive you because he knows exactly where it is. Do either of you know how to use guns?" Shane asked. Jacqui said she knew but I had to admit that I didn't but if I had a knife or something sharp I'd be good. We heard Ed grunt something and looked over at him, he was not looking pleased at all with the plans.

"Something you want to say Ed?" I asked him.

"Just that I don't see why you two would volunteer in the first place? You're probably going to freeze up when the first sign of danger comes up. Why don't you just leave it to the men and go back to watching the kids". As he said all this he got closer to me until he was practically in my face. I had to hold my breath because I felt like vomiting as his tobacco tainted breath was hitting me in the face. I really hated cigarettes. They were just foul smelling cancer sticks and they reminded me of the scars I had on my neck and arms from an asshole who used me as an ash tray when I misbehaved. An asshole that was actually a lot like Ed and I had wanted to never meet another one like him again. Sadly my past seems to like to come back and haunt me no matter how many times I say I'm over it and how faint those scars became.

"Well I thought that I would be nice and offer to help out because from the looks of it you weren't all that thrilled to go out anyway. Besides are you really going to complain about gender roles when we need all the help we can get now?" I say as I try to back away from him, I was having a hard time trying not to gag from the scent that was clinging to him. But he was trying to make sure I didn't escape. I could tell I was pissing him off because his cold blue eyes were glaring at me so hard and he looked like he wanted to strangle me. He didn't stop until I heard T-dog and Morales both tell Ed to snap out of it and give me space.

"What? Are we really just going to let this little harlot talk like that? I've seen women like her, think there too good for chores because they act tough. Well let me tell you something it doesn't matter that you come from some fancy northern city, got some ink on you or fought some of those things. You're going to learn your place the hard way if you don't now, and then you'll regret how you told every guy to screw off because no one will help you!" He stormed off after that, with Carol following him hot on his heels. Most would think that it was a gesture of a supportive wife but from the look on her face it looked like she wanted to do anything but go after him. I frown thinking about what she must put up with because of the Neanderthal of a man, and how poor little Sophia has to grow up with him for a dad. But I turn back to the guys and continue with planning for later. I really didn't care at all about what Ed had to say because it wasn't true. I didn't think I wasn't above those things, heck I was the one who did most of the cleaning at the apartment because Reese was a slob. The only thing I cared about was later when they came back and Carol had bruises from being too "clumsy" in the woods. I wanted so badly to face him about it and help Carol but it didn't feel like it was in my place to intervene. Unless Carol was willing to admit that Ed was beating her or if anything happened to Sophia I would just be making matters worse for them. Fortunately I was distracted from acting out my thoughts by Merle and Daryl Dixon coming back to camp with a bunch of squirrels that were supposed to be for dinner and Merle was making a scene as usual.

"Yeah I was able to get this one with my bare hands! Little thing barely saw it coming, hey Falco! Why don't you come over here, sit on my lap and I'll tell you some stories about how Merle fought with a wild boar with just a pocket knife."

"I think I can hear the story just fine from where I'm sitting Merle. Heck I think people in China can hear you since your practically shouting it." I say as I reach up and fix the messy bun that was trying to come loose. The hair tie that Lori had given me was not very strong and I'm pretty sure that it's now threatening to break as I tighten it around my ungodly thick hair.

"Hey I didn't know you were into tats Falco, now we got something to talk about! Got any others you'd be willing to show your friend Merle or are they in some "secret" places?" I sighed as he said this, I had a feeling he'd say something like this once he found out but that doesn't mean I'm any less annoyed by it. Well I won't be wearing any tank tops or sheer t-shirts for a while because I don't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing the one on my back. Then he'd really be annoying me about searching me for others.

"Hey Merle, how about you get your off your lazy ass and skin the rest of the squirrels? I'm done with mine and I'm not doing yours." Daryl came in at just the right moment. Merle gave him a look but got up and went towards them anyway saying something about needing to piss soon anyway. Oh how lovely to picture. Daryl took Merle's seat and was carving something with a knife, it was now just me and him because everyone else scattered elsewhere when they came back but I couldn't get away because Merle saw me. I took a closer look at what Daryl was carving and realized that it was a stake. He must be running out of arrows and needed to make do with whatever he could find. I guess I should ask if he needed more from the hunting shop.

"Hey me, Jacqui and Morales are leaving in a bit to check out that hunting shop not too far away. Do you want me to pick up any more arrows?" He stopped what he was doing but just stared at the ground.

"An answer would be nice. It doesn't have to be anything elegant, just a yes or no would do." I understand that he's doesn't like to talk other than to his brother but this was a simple yes or no question and if he keeps acting like this anytime we're around each other I'm going to sick of it real fast.

"What the hell do you know about crossbows? And why the hell are they just sending you three out there?" he asked. Well it's not an answer but at least he's talking to me. That's some improvement.

"Not much but if you just tell me what you need I think I can manage. And we're going because we volunteered to go and Shane only wants to send enough people so we can watch each other's backs but still have enough here to protect the camp. If I can't find what arrows you need there I'm ok with tracking down where we were ambushed and salvaging what's left."

"There's no way anyone can be this stupid. You can't go back there because it was overrun by geeks and your piece of shit car isn't worth it! Do you have a death wish or something?"

"Watch it Dixon, keep this up and I might start to think you care about me. And if you won't tell me what you need then you might as well come with. You can get your stuff all by yourself and you can drive your truck so we can store more stuff. I'll be riding with Morales and Jacqui so you can be in your truck all by yourself."

"What do I look like a fucking pack mule?"

"Hey I'm not forcing you to do anything you don't want to. I'm just giving you a choice and trying to be civil. You can either tell me what you need or go and get it yourself. You don't even have to answer me now, just show up in half an hour and let me know them." With that I got up and started to leave him but something stopped me for a minute. I realized that I'm all talk about trying to be the nice yet I forgot to the one thing I should have done a long time ago.

"Oh I before I forget, thank you for saving me. I can't say I've met a lot of people who would be willing to do that, especially since I was so distrusting of you and Merle. But for whatever reasons why you did it, I really am grateful even if I don't always seem like it." He wasn't responding and I didn't want to turn around because I didn't want to seem more vulnerable than I already am. I didn't have to say all that but I did anyway, wow why does it take dire situations for me to open up? Especially when no one is safe and it's probably better not to open up to someone who could be dead the next day. I start to walk away when I was surprised by Daryl speaking up.

"Sounds like you've met too many assholes." I smile at that. Maybe opening up isn't too bad, just as long as it's in small doses.

"Maybe I have. But it's made me stronger and not give a shit about them." And with that I left to go help Amy watch the kids.

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It's finally time to head out. Morales was saying goodbye to his family and telling them we'd be back soon. I could see that his wife was really worried but she was trying to stay positive for her kids. Jacqui was getting reminders from T-dog about how to use a gun, it seems like the two have gotten close really quickly. I was with Dale and Shane talking about what to do if the place is overrun with geeks or which other places we should go to if there's nothing there anymore. They gave me a hunting knife I was able to keep it safe in my tall boots and Shane also gave me a gun just in case.

"Just remember to only use the gun if necessary. You don't want to draw any attention and we want to save bullets but if you have to just remember to remove the safety, grip it tight with both hands and try to keep it steady while shooting. Don't cross your thumbs while holding it and the higher you have your hand on the grip the better the shock absorber it will be." Shane instructed me.

"Well let's hope it won't come to that. Natalie I'm trusting that you'll be very careful but don't wander to far from Jacqui and Morales. Don't feel like you have to do things on your own…" Dale was interrupted by a crash and a slur of curses. We turn and see that Merle and Daryl were trying to get the motorcycle out of the bed of truck but it ended up not going as smoothly as they would have liked. Merle was laying under his motorcycle and shouting every curse word at his brother. We were all watching them like it was a comedy show and the kids were trying hold in their laughter. Miranda was trying to cover her kids ears to prevent them from hearing the profanities and Carol and Lori were trying to follow her lead.

"What the hell are those idiots doing?" T-dog asked as he Jacqui and Morales came over to get a closer look at what was going on.

"I think Daryl decided that he's going to come with us after all." I said trying not to laugh.

"Why didn't you mention this earlier? If we are going to be working together I need to be informed of these things ahead of time and give my approval." Shane said.

"I didn't know if he would. I asked if he needed anything while we were gone but then thought it might be better if he just came along. I gave him time to think about it and it looks like he made up his mind. Besides I think his truck will hold more supplies than that Suzuki Samurai will." I say pointing to the car that we will be using, we decided that Shane's jeep wouldn't work, Ed refused to give his car up and T-dog brought a Dodge Ram Wagon that was too long to handle the very curvy roads we would need to take. Shane looked like he wanted to argue but he couldn't think of anything to counter my logic.

"Well next time if that happens let me know." He rubbed his head and stomped off. Jacqui and Morales headed off toward the car and I turned to say goodbye to Dale. Amy had joined him to say goodbye and they were giving me strange looks.

"Please don't look at me like that. I just asked if he needed arrows and he got all defensive for some reason so I said he could get them himself."

"Actually I feel a little better knowing he's going. I felt like Shane was sending you three out there blind so this may be for the best." Dale admitted.

"Yeah it's like you said Natalie, they know what they're doing and are best equipped for these situations. I know that you're going to be alright." Amy said. We started to bond more while watching the kids, we were able to talk about our university lives and felt normal for the first time in twenty-four hours. The kids also started to warm up to us but they mostly warmed up to Amy because she's more sweet and nurturing than me. I was just the one that said funny things and wasn't afraid to joke around with them.

"Of course we are. We aren't going too far and we'll be back before dark." I smile and head off toward the Suzuki. I looked over toward the truck and saw that Merle got his bike off and was standing up.

"Whatch ya think of my ride Falco? Pretty sweet huh? If you want I may be willing to take you for a ride one day." He said with a pervy grin on his face. I rolled my eyes at his not so subtle innuendo.

"I prefer Harley Davidsons. Are you coming too or are you staying?"

"Staying. Someone here has to make sure the people are taken care of." I follow his eyes and see that he is eyeing up Andrea. I can't help but feel bad for her but feel grateful that I'm not the only one Merle would be harassing.

"Yeah, that's why." I got in the Suzuki and Morales drove off with Daryl driving right behind us.

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**Okay this one is mostly a slow and short chapter. In the next chapter I will be introducing another member of the group but I'll leave who it is as a surprise. I'll try to post the next chapter as so as I can since I'm almost done with it. **

**So like always feel free to review, favorite or follow and I hope you enjoy this chapter. **


	5. First Run

**Disclaimer: Still don't own any of the Walking Dead characters.**

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Chapter 5

We were driving along the bumpy road for a while. Making some small talk along the way. Morales didn't reveal too much about himself but he seemed like a nice enough guy. He mostly talked about how much he cared for his family and he was hoping that his other relatives were doing fine out in Alabama. Jacqui worked for the city's zoning department in Atlanta and was got separated from her brothers during the outbreak.

"I was with my brothers when we heard the tanks come in. It was horrible. There were so many people panicking and running away. It seemed like more and more were getting infected and nothing the military was doing was working. I don't even know how I got out, just that T-dog eventually picked me up in that ugly church van and we found our way towards you guys. I don't even know what happened to my brothers. I just know that if my mom were alive now she'd be disappointed that I lost them". Jacqui told us her story of what happened. It turns out that all hell broke loose only a little while after I had got evicted. I don't know how I would have dealt with it and can't help but admire Jacqui for being able to get out of there.

"I know how you feel. If my parents or grandparents were still alive I feel they wouldn't be happy that Reese wasn't with me when this all happened. They always stressed how strong and important family bonds are. But I also know that they would try to get over it and focus on whether or not we were safe and did everything we could to survive." I said.

"But at least you heard from her. You know that she wasn't there and that she was alive. She still tried to keep you safe, no matter how far away she was."

"Yeah. That's why I can't give up hope that I'll see her again. I'm not sure how but I'm going to find her or die trying, and I know that if your family could see you now they would be proud of you Jacqui for being so strong."

It got quiet after that. I don't know if my words helped Jacqui or made her feel worse but we soon arrived at our destination. We drove down a curvy dirt road and came across the store. Well a more accurate description would be that it was a wooden lodge that was converted into a store. There was another car here but it was very old and it would be miracle if it ran. However that still didn't mean that the place was abandoned so we got out of the car and were approaching the store carefully. I pulled my knife out of my boot and kept it by my side while Jacqui and Morales had their guns out ready to use them just in case. We all agreed in the car that Morales would lead us in and the rest will take the back.

"Okay, I'm going to in first. Then he can come in you girls keep watch out here until we give the all clear." He instructed us. Me and Jacqui nodded are heads but Daryl had other ideas.

"You kidding? You can't go in there guns blazing. You'll attract every geek within miles of hearing the gunshots."

"Well then what do you think we should do? Let you go in there by yourself while we wait out here? We're supposed to be a team." Jacqui snapped at him. I sighed realizing this isn't going to well.

"Hey! This was supposed to be an easy trip. Go in, get our stuff and get out. We are wasting time here arguing about what we should be doing instead of doing it!" I snapped.

"She's right. Okay new plan, since you have the quieter weapon you can go in first and then have Natalie cover you. We'll check the perimeter to see if it's all clear. You give the signal to tell us if its all clear and we can take whatever is in there." Morales said. Even I'll admit that it was a better plan than before. The lodge was small so it shouldn't take long for Daryl and I to search it and clear out hopefully just one or two geeks if they are in there and it's also good that Morales and Jacqui will keep watch to make sure we don't get ambushed or be able to warn each other if someone is coming.

"Fine. Keep close Falco and don't do anything stupid."

"Glad you have so much faith in me Dixon." Daryl then went to lodge, pulled out his bow and cautiously went to open the door. I followed close behind gripping my knife tightly in my hand. He opened the door and crept inside. Once he was far enough in he motioned for me to move forward. The place would have been completely dark if it weren't for the windows. There were shelves filled with guns, ammo and all sorts of supplies for hunting. I could see a crossbow and some arrows behind the checkout counter and knew Daryl was eyeing it and fighting the urge to go grab it. There were also aisles that had other useful supplies like fishing poles and axes. I'm hoping that there are more tents somewhere around here so I have more privacy and get less bug bites.

He motioned for me to go left while he checks out the right side of the store. So now he trusts me not to do anything stupid. I nod anyway and make my way over to the other side. There's a cloud of dust that fills the air and I try my hardest not to sneeze but then I'm distracted by a familiar smell. It's the same smell from when I was looking for spark plugs in the back of my car. As I get closer I also hear the sound of flies swarming and when I turn the corner I'm met with a gruesome sight. It's a body of a man with a beard wearing a flannel shirt, vest and a baseball hat. He's leaning against a counter and has a bullet hole in his gut and his hands are covered in blood. I guess he got shot and died while he was trying to stop the bleeding. Thinking he's safe I continue to make my way down the aisle until I see his head tilt to the side and open his eyes. SHIT! He must have been bitten! He starts growling and tries to reach out towards me but I grabbed my knife and stabbed him in the head. His hand grabs my wrist but I'm quicker and my knife sinks in his eye socket and he stops moving all together. I shake his hand off my wrist and see that he had a large bite on his left forearm and a gun right beside him. Daryl appears from around the corner and see's what's keeping me.

"Why are you the one who gets all the fun? All clear here?"

"Yeah, I had to take this one out. It looks like he got bit but ended up dying from a gunshot."

"Well I found his buddy over there. Clean shot to the head. Guess when this one got bit all hell went loose and it ended with a gun fight. It probably happened eight hours ago because it doesn't look like this one was back for that long."

"So it takes about that long them to get reanimated?"

"You don't have to be all fancy about it, and I don't know. One time I met someone who died and came back almost immediately. Shot that motherfucker between the eyes before he could let out his first moan."

"So other than this guy and his friend is it all clear here?" Before he can answer we hear a gunshot from outside.

"Shit! What now?!" Daryl hissed before running out with me following right behind him. My heart was pounding as I was running worried about what happened. We reach were the gunshot was fired to find Jacqui still holding her gun but there weren't any geeks around.

"Jacqui what happened?" I asked her. Morales was now running over to see what was going on, something we would all like to know.

"There was a snake! It was going to attack me, I had no choice!" she said and at that moment I knew Daryl was going to explode from anger.

"You gave away our position to geeks and whoever is around because of a fucking snake! Dammit women don't you know that only a few of the snakes out here are poisonous and even if they are your more likely to get bitten scaring it than leaving it alone!"

"Hey I know what I saw! It was going to attack so I did what I had to. Look its right there!" sure enough there was a very long snake a couple feet away from us. But it's head was blown off because of the force of the bullet. Daryl went over to it to see if it was indeed poisonous and me and Morales were trying to console Jacqui. It's not her fault she's not used to situations like this. We can't all be nature experts like Daryl supposedly is. I would probably have done something similar if I was in Jacqui's shoes.

"Well I can't be too certain because you blew its fucking head off, but it does look like it was Southern Copperhead. They are poisonous but you could have just backed away slowly." Okay that's enough.

"Look Daryl we didn't all grow up in the backwoods of Georgia. Some us have probably never even been camping so don't expect us to be nature experts like Bear Grylls and remain calm during something like that. Now let's go back to the store get what we need and go." I start to head back to the lodge with the others when I hear Daryl shout.

"Am I supposed to know who the hell that is Falco?" he shouted at me. I rolled my eyes as I heard his footsteps following us. I guess he didn't watch a lot of TV.

"You really did live under a rock didn't you? He's a british adventurer. Never watched Man vs. Wild?"

"Unlike you I actually went outside and did stuff instead of just watching some hack on TV!"he shouted back. Morales and Jacqui were smirking at our banter. Well at least we got over the snake incident.

* * *

"So what do we have so far?" I asked Morales as we were finishing collecting what we could.

"Let's see. We got some riffles, ammo, a lot of beef jerky, more cans of beans, tents, sleeping bags, fishing poles, axes, more arrows for redneck Bear Grylls over there" he said that one with a smile and laughed when we heard Daryl grunt I shut up. "traps that would be good for both animals and geeks and that box of canned beans and water. I wish there was more food but it looks like whoever owned this place took most of it and left."

"I know. I was hoping that because this place was so isolated there'd be less of a chance of it being picked clean. But let's just get the rest of these boxes in the truck and head back."

"Natalie didn't you say you had a car filled with stuff? Maybe we could go see if you can fix it and bring it back to camp." Jacqui said from the doorway still holding the box she was about to carry out.

"I thought about it and I think Dale was right about it being a lost cause. It wouldn't be fair to drag you guys all the way out there for nothing." I said. I hate giving up but Morales has a family that is waiting for him, T-dog is probably worried about Jacqui and even though Merle probably won't admit it but he cares about Daryl. Speaking of Daryl he felt the need to make a comment at this time.

"This is new. I never took you for a quitter. Just a stubborn hard ass." Well isn't he a charmer.

"It's not quitting. I'm just being realistic; I'm going to help Jacqui finish loading the truck. You guys want to double check to see if we missed anything we need?" I asked.

"We got it Natalie." Morales said and he went to check out the storage room in the back. I bent over to grab a box and went out the door while Daryl was looking behind the cashier counter again. Even though he was being an ass I don't regret inviting him. I hate to admit it but it's kind of fun bantering with him and the day isn't over so we may still need his skills. We may not be anywhere near close to being friends but there's something about talking with him that makes me feel normal. It reminds me of some of my friends in New York, we had fun teasing each other and always ended up laughing about it over pizza and beer. Only difference is that Daryl means what he says to me and we don't get tipsy later and laugh about it.

I'm halfway to the truck and can see Jacqui shoving her box as far towards the front as she could when noticed something off. Something was moving towards her but it wasn't slow like a walker. It was moving fast and had to be human and it was about to grab Jacqui.

"Jacqui look out!" I shout dropping my box and charging towards Jacqui's attacker. She was able to turn around in time and back away but he was still reaching for her shoulders. I probably should have pulled out my gun and shot him but I wasn't thinking very clearly. Before i knew it I tackled him and we hit the ground, I tried to grab his arms to hold him down but he was fighting back really hard. I was kicking and throwing a lot of punches but he was fighting back too. The next thing I knew I was on my back and he had his hands around my neck.

"You give them back! Give me back my family you monster!" he yelled at me as he continued to strangle me. He was mad. He thought I was one of them and he doesn't even realize that he's slowly killing me. I tried to tell him to stop but my airway was blocked and all I could do was make weird gasping sounds.

"Get off her! Get off her or I will shoot you!" I heard Jacqui yell at him. Her yelling seemed far away as I was starting to slowly lose consciousness from lack of oxygen. Before I could black out though the man was thrown off me and I was able to sit up. I was gasping for air and Jacqui was kneeling and rubbing my back telling me I was okay. I look over to see that Daryl was now wrestling with the man and had him in a choke hold.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Attacking a woman while her back is turned and then trying to kill another one. Well you're not going to be hurting anyone anymore!" he yelled at him. Daryl's face was turning red and he had a lot of rage in his eyes while the strangers face was turning white and he could hardly breathe.

"Daryl stop!"  
"You're killing him" Morales and Jacqui were yelling at him.

"He was going to kill her! I say he lost his right to live." He yelled back at them. After taking a couple deep breaths I was able to find my voice.

"Daryl let him go! He's not well; he thought I was a geek! I think he actually wants to die!" I yell at him. He doesn't deserve to die if he doesn't know he did anything wrong. He was yelling for his family so he's probably been through a lot. Daryl looked at me like he was going to yell at me but I guess he could see the desperation in my eyes so he released the man from his choke hold but was still restraining his arms.

"Why'd you stop! Do it! Kill me! I just want my wife and kids back!" He started to break down in sobs. My god this poor man must have seen his family get killed right in front him. We were all just looking at him in pity (Daryl had slight pity, he was still on edge from earlier). Morales had a look of horror on his face most likely thinking about getting back to his own family as soon as he could. Jacqui looked close to tears thinking about the brothers she may never see again. I stepped forward and crouched so that I would be at eye level with him, Daryl tighten his grip on the man to make sure he wouldn't lunge at me. Jacqui came forward and joined me, we were going to try to help him because we know what he is going through.

"Hey, it's going to be okay. We aren't going to hurt you. What's your name?" I asked him. He looked in my eyes and started to calm down. He no longer saw me as a monster that would take his life. He was still taking breaths as talked to me.

"Jim… my name is Jim." He said. Jacqui decided to take over from here.

"Jim, we know what you are going through. You are not alone in this. We have all been affected by this in some way. We have lost our homes and our families. I've lost my brothers in Atlanta and Natalie here got separated from her sister. But one thing we aren't losing yet is our hope. Hope that we will survive and be with our loved ones once again."

"We can't give up yet Jim." I said. "When this all started I was homeless, unemployed and my only family left is my sister who is out there somewhere. But luckily I'm not alone. I have these guys and we have a camp not far from here with more people who are in our positions. If you like we want you to come join us but you need to promise to be calm otherwise Dixon here is going to burst a blood vessel keeping you held down." I could see that he was actually starting to calm down. His breathing was slowing down to a normal rate and his eyes no longer held terror or anxiety.

"I promise."

"Daryl you can let him go now." I say as I look in his eyes. He still looked unsure and mad about what happened earlier but he let Jim go. It wasn't very graceful as Jim fell to the ground and Daryl got up really fast and grabbed his crossbow on the ground still watching Jim like he was an animal that needed to be put down. "Good. Just wondering how did you find this place?"

"I was wandering around, still in a daze about what happened yesterday." He looked like he was about to crack again but he was able to regain his composure and continue. "There were some abandon cars along the way, I was looking at them to see if I could fix one to take because I used to be a mechanic when I heard a gunshot and followed where the source came from." We all looked at Jacqui for a minute. She was avoiding our eye contact still feeling guilty about what had happened earlier. I could tell Daryl was about to tell her off but I glared at him hoping he would get that now was not the time. Fortunately he didn't fight me on that.

"When I saw you" he gestured to Jacqui, "I didn't intend to harm you, I just wanted to talk because you were the first person I've seen in all day. But then you" he gestured towards me "started yelling and when I saw you I thought you were one of them. When you tackled me I just acted out of instinct. I'm sorry about that but I really did think you were dead."

"That's the one thing I'm confused about. I know you weren't yourself but why did you think I was dead?"

"Last time I checked the dead didn't scream like banshees and pounce like lions." I heard Daryl say. I sent him a glare but he didn't acknowledge it.

"I found this by an abandoned car with a bunch of dead bodies around it. I just assumed you were one of them." He handed me a black wallet with a bright splashes of neon paint that looked familiar. I opened it very fast and was greeted with my license.

"Wait! You found my car?" I asked him. Daryl had a look of shock on his face and became more invested in the conversation.

"Yeah, no one was around and there were some boxes that fell to the street so I picked them up to see what was there. I found the spark plugs, put them in, packed the boxes back in the car and drove it out here. It's actually a just around those trees." I jogged over to where he pointed and sure enough there was my crappy Toyota. I couldn't help but smile at it, I was told by so many people it was lost and yet here it was right in front of me. I was so happy that I wasn't even bothered when Daryl came up right next to me.

"Am I still stupid for wanting this piece of crap?" I asked him with a smirk. He didn't react to that though; he still had a look of disbelief on his face.

"Does everything end up working out for you? Cuz it sure seems like you have dumb luck." He said.

"Trust me Dixon. If I told you about my past you'd think someone had cast a gypsy curse on me when I was young." I said laughing and he was staring at me like I lost my mind, which I probably did but I didn't give a fuck at that moment. If I could be reunited with my piece of shit car than there wasn't a doubt in my mind that I would find Reese.

* * *

I decided to drive my car back to the camp with Jim as my passenger. He hesitated because he still thought I was mad at him for almost killing me but I told him that it was water under the bridge and that I did attack him first so it's not like he didn't have reason to fight back. As I was driving I was smiling thinking of the look on Dale and Andrea's faces as I drive up with my car that was a lost cause. I can't remember being this happy in a long time, even before the outbreak. Which may be sad to admit but I can't help it. This car not only has enough food to add to what we obtained from the store and what we already have but it also has my clothes so I won't have to borrow any from anyone, my pillow which I can add to the sleeping bag and tent I'll be sleeping tonight, and it also has my camera and photo albums with all of my old work and pictures of friends and family.

We just arrived at the camp and I pulled in and parked behind the Suzuki. I could see everyone staring in confusion as me and Jim got out of my car. Dale and Amy came up to me with looks of shock on their faces (Well Dale mostly, Amy looked very happy that I was happy).

"Told you I was stubborn and don't stop until I get what I want." I said to Dale reminding him of the conversation we had last night.

"I guess so. And while I'm glad you're happy I have to ask who your friend here is?" he said eyes not taking his eyes off Jim.

"This is Jim. We met him at the hunting lodge and he's actually the one who fixed and brought my car back to me. He needs a place to stay and he's a mechanic so maybe he can help you out with your RV."

His face softens and his eyes light up when I say the last part. He immediately goes up to Jim to introduce himself and they start talking about engines and duct tape. I go to open the trunk of my car and start unloading the supplies with Amy. Everyone looked pleased as the pile of canned goods kept getting bigger and I gave the kids granola bars to eat knowing they were probably hungry and dinner wasn't going to be ready for another hour or so. I was just looking in trunk to see if that all the food was gone when something caught my eye. It was a photo album I didn't recognize as my own so I pulled it out and opened it. Inside on the first page there was card that said Property of Reese Falco in cursive writing. I never knew she had this, I knew she would like to take pictures from time to time but she was never as into it as I was. Before I knew it Amy and the rest of the woman were behind me looking through it with me.

"Oh is that your sister Reese?" I heard Amy ask. She was pointing to a picture of the two us at Coney Island from about two years ago. It was at night and we were on the beach so we had the Ferris wheel and the other rides in background. I nodded.

"She looks a lot like you, just some little differences." I heard Carol say somewhere behind me. I heard that a lot and she was right. Other than the dark hair and piercings on her face Reese also had slightly higher cheek bones and her skin tone was a little darker than mine. Her skin tone had a hint of olive and I only got that if I spent a lot of time in the sun. Other than that it was obvious we were related.

Somehow the women decided that it would be fun to take out my photo albums and look through them. I kept getting compliments about my professionally done photos of landscapes, cities and even some of people.

"Hey this guy is pretty cute" Amy pointed out one photo. I had a feeling I knew who she was talking about but I still laughed a little when my suspicions where confirmed when I looked at the photo.

"Oh that was Adrian. I was an intern for this photo company that mostly did glossy magazine covers. I won't deny that it was fun working with the male models but after a while you realize some of them were shallow and didn't have much personality. Especially Adrian, he was shocked when I didn't want to go out with him afterwards. He probably wasn't used to rejection."

"But he's so cute! How could you say no?" she asked looking at me like I was crazy.

"Looks can only go so far Amy, he didn't have a good sense of humor and he was so shallow I swear any time we talked I thought he was looking into my eyes to see if he needed to fix his hair." We both let out big laughs when I said that. The other women were laughing and I heard some of them agreeing with me about what I said about personality. Andrea was still looking through Reese's album when she pulled out a Polaroid that was stuck in the pages. "Natalie is this your family?" she asked. I looked over at what she was holding and couldn't believe my eyes. I thought we lost that photo during one of our moves and I was devastated for a long time. It was a group shot of me, Reese, my parents and my grandparents all huddled together. I was probably five years old around the time because Reese looked twelve. She was standing in front of my dad and he had his hands on her shoulders. He had a goofy smile on his face and looked a typical "Italian stallion" as my mom used to call him with his olive skin tone, muscular build and wavy dark hair. My mom was looking beautiful in her pale blue sundress that matched her eyes and her blonde hair slightly blowing in the wind. She was holding me on her hip even though I was probably a little heavy for her to be lifting with her delicate frame. Finally there were my grandparents on either side of my parents. Their olive skin tones had some wrinkles on them and their dark hair was streaked with gray. We all had smiles on our faces and this was actually my last happy memory of us all together.

"Yeah it is. I was afraid I'd never see this photo again." I say as I gently take it from Andrea who was holding it out to me.

"Natalie, I know this may not be the best thing to ask but you only talk about your sister? What about your parents or anyone else?" Lori asked. I tensed a little as she said that and I'm pretty sure Lori got some looks for saying it. But they were probably all just as curious as she was and I didn't mind. I'm used to telling my story. I just didn't realize that I'd be telling the whole camp because it seemed at that moment the guys stopped doing whatever they were doing and were trying to listen in.

"It's okay Lori. I'm used to talking about this. They've been gone for a long time. My dad was a Marine for as long as I can remember and when I was seven years old he died overseas. My mom was never a picture of health so I was usually taken care of by my grandparents while she was ill. She died when I was nine. I lived with my grandparents until they passed when I was around eleven or twelve I think. From then on I kept moving around from foster homes, friends' houses, got into NYU and after that I moved out here with Reese when she was done roaming the country doing whatever job she could take." All I heard was silence as I heard everyone take in my story. I left out some details about how Reese wanted to take me in but was never given permission from the state because she never had a stable job or place to live or how some of the foster homes I'd been with weren't always the nicest (some didn't care, and some were really bad) because I didn't want to open up about that stuff. It made me stronger and I didn't want anyone to pity more than they did already. No matter how shitty my life was I would always be able to take care of myself.

"I'm okay though. Really, I've had enough time to cope with it and now I can't picture how they would deal with all this if they were still around. Now I'm going to go set up my tent for the night, let me know when dinner is ready okay." Amy nodded and said she'd let me know. I grabbed my photo albums and a tent and headed over to where I slept last night. As I was setting it up I couldn't help but notice that Daryl would stare at me from time to time. That's weird; he had to be a good amount away from where we were all talking. There's no way he heard any of that… right?

"What are you looking at?" I asked him.

"Making sure you don't get yourself into any more trouble. Today is the second day I had to save your ass."

"What? You think the tent is going to attack me?"

"With you it seems everything attacks you. Plus it seems to be fighting with you and winning."

"Well then why don't you teach me?"

"For Christ's sake woman I'm joking, your tent is almost done anyway."

"I'm not talking about the tent, I'm talking about defending myself. I don't care if it's shooting a gun, crossbow, throwing knives or even fighting with my bare hands just teach me since you believe you're a better fighter than any of the self-defense and kick boxing instructors I ever had." I say as I finally get my tent up. I turned around to see him processing what I had just said. I didn't realize that he'd take it seriously. I'd just thought he would blow me off.

"Wake up at dawn, and bring some throwing knives, bow and arrow or whatever you can find. Guns are too loud for now and you're not getting your hands on my damn crossbow. Your decent with your hands and a knife but you got to stop being so impulsive."

"The impulsiveness runs in my family. My dad and grandfather would tell me to always go with my gut because it's the one part of you that can't be deceived or lie to you. It's going to take a while to ignore it."

"Well then let's hope your marine daddy gave you a good aim." I knew he was listening! That's pretty impressive that he could hear from that far.

"Heard that didn't you? You're not going to treat me any differently now are you?" I asked. That happened a lot to me when people found out. When they heard about my parents dying at such a young age they treat me like a broken doll, when they heard about foster care they treated me like a ticking time bomb. Either way I hated it and even though it was inevitable with most of the group the last person I wanted to treat me like that was Daryl. His brash and honest nature was something I admired about him.

"Nope." He said emphasizing the P. "Still the same girl I found on the side of the road. Not going to treat you any differently than I already do."

"Thanks, you don't know how much I appreciate that." I said sincerely. The rest of the night wasn't that interesting. I just ate dinner with the group and went to bed early. I'm not a morning person in general so I was dreading the idea of waking up tomorrow, but if Daryl's willing to teach me I may as well try to be respectful student if I end up being horrible at whatever he has in store.

* * *

**End. Up next hunting and training with Daryl. Thanks to all the people who have favorited and followed the story since last time.**


	6. Bullets, Knives and Arrows oh my!

**Hey I want to thank you all so much for reading and like to welcome those who have favorited and followed the story since the last update! I didn't think I would update this soon but I was kind of in the zone when writing this chapter and I just thought "Why wait to post? I should just do it now." Now I'm replying to comment(s).**

**The all power full Q: glad you love it so far! here's the next chapter. I'm trying to do a routine update but it seems I always upload at random times. It all depends on when and how much I can type.**

**Disclaimer: i do not nor will i ever own The Walking Dead (a girl can dream though).**

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Chapter 6

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!" I'm awoken to the sound of screaming. I sit upright in my tent and grab the knife and gun from my earlier and storm out the tent ignoring the fact that I'm just dressed in a tank top and boy shorts. There are so many of them attacking everywhere. Gunfire is going off and there are so many screams filling the air that I can't tell who they belong to. I see Shane firing a rifle from the roof of the RV and T-dog and Morales firing their guns at approaching zombies. I can't find the others though because I'm shortly ambushed by geeks. One is snarling and about to bite my face before I drive the knife into its head. When it falls I shoot at the one that's coming for me. I miss the first two times but by the third I hit it in the face. I keep shooting until I see Sophia about to be attacked. She's crawling backwards away from it screaming for her mom. I run towards her and start shooting at the geek until it drops dead. I scope her up into my arms stroking her hair and telling her she's going to be alright.

"Aaaaaaah! Help!" I look over to see Amy about to be attacked. I run towards her trying to balance holding Sophia and aiming my gun towards Amy's attacker but I'm too late. It launches itself on her and they fall to the ground. Its teeth tearing at the flesh on her neck and her screaming soon ceases.

"Amy!" I hear Andrea scream as she runs towards her but she to is also attacked and meets the same fate as her sister.

"No!" I scream. Sophia starts to cry harder into my shoulder and I just hold her close.

"Natalie! Over here!" I hear Dale yell from inside the RV. He's at the door and is holding his hand out to me. I start to run forward but soon a body falls off the top of the roof. It's Shane and he's now one of them. I watch horrified as he tackled Dale and blood starts to flow out of the RV.

The next thing I know something attacks me from behind and Sophia falls out of my arms and rolls down the hill. I scream and try to break free from what is holding me down. But it's too strong, the next thing I know someone is pulling me by hair to look up and I look to my sides to see who is holding down my arms. I'm shocked when I come face to face with people who have been dead for so long. My father is pinning down my right arm and my mother is pinning down my left. They are wearing the clothes from the picture I saw earlier but they didn't look the same. They now had very ashen rotting skin and they had dirt and bugs crawling all over them. In front of me stood three people. My grandparents were in the back and Reese stood at the front. They all were dead and looking at me with lifeless eyes, Reese opened her mouth and I am surprised to hear her speak.

"You can't keep this going Natalie. You can't keep lying to yourself that everything is fine. They are all dead now." She pointed behind me. I looked around and saw a sight so horrible I thought I was going to vomit. It was almost everyone in the camp, all dead lined up in a row. I saw Amy, Ed, Jim, Jacqui, Sophia, Dale, Shane, Lori, Merle and Andrea. There were other bodies but I couldn't make out there faces.

"No! You're wrong! They can't be dead yet, you can't be dead! Everything is okay for now. I'm still alive…" I say tears rolling down my face and my voice becoming hoarse. She tilts her head and an evil smile spreads across her face.

"Why Natalie, my sweet baby sister. It's ok to tell the truth. You act all strong and you have convinced yourself you feel good. But the truth is that you've been dead inside this whole time." She reaches her hand out to caress my face. I tremble as her blood soaked decaying hand grazes my check and then presses itself over my heart. I look down to see that I'm bleeding from my chest. She pulls away her hand and I see a bullet hole over my heart and its oozing blood. My skin is now pale white, my nails are yellow, chipped and my veins are blue and threatening to pop out of my skin. There is also blood running down my mouth. Oh my god! I'm one of them! I hear the sound of a gun click and turn my head to stare down the barrel of a gun being held by Daryl.

"You're a monster Falco." He says before he pulls the trigger and everything goes black.

….

….

….

_Gasp!_ I wake in a cold sweat. I'm breathing so hard I swear that everyone could probably hear me right now. I throw my hands over my chest instinctively but there is no bullet hole. My skin is its regular peachy color and my nails are mostly clean. It was all a dream; thank god it was all a dream! I pull my hand away to see a faint round scar over heart, I forget the exact details of how I got it but I know that I forgot them for a reason. I couldn't deal with the pain the memories brought. Memories that seem to be resurfacing since I pulled out those photo albums. God, I'm losing it. Taking a peak out of my tent I see the sun about to rise and realize I have to meet Daryl soon. Has it really been three days since this all began? I get out of my sleeping bag and throw on a pair of jeans, a plaid button up shirt over the tank top I slept in and my boots. I put half of my hair back in a hair tie and left my tent, I approached my car and opened the trunk looking for something important I soon find it in a box marked bathroom and pulled out a little travel bag that held medication. I pulled out the two bottles that had my name on it. One was birth control because the last thing I needed now was to get horrible cramps that would slow me down and the next was the bottle that I really needed. The one that contained the little pill that helps my mind stay clear, keep the bad dreams and feelings away and all around helps me function. I put both of them in my mouth and grab a bottle of water to help wash them down.

Once I was done I looked through a box of weapons I agreed to keep locked up so the kids wouldn't get into them. I find a belt full of throwing knives, a bow with some arrows and a folding knife with a gut hook (I returned the one Dale gave me earlier, something my dream self forgot) and grab a backpack to store some stuff to take with me. The bow folds so I stuff that in my bag with the arrows along with some protein bars and two bottles of water. I hook the belt around my waist and stuff the knife in my boot and I walk over to the Dixon's tent to see Daryl come out of it. I could hear Merle's snoring come out of it so I guess he's not joining us today.

"You look like hell." Daryl states. That was probably an understatement. I'm sure that because of the lack of sleep I'm getting I probably have dark circles under my eyes and I'm sure there was bruising on my neck from when Jim attacked me yesterday.

"I'm not a morning person. What are we doing today?" I ask.

"We're going hunting. Yesterday before Merle and I came back I saw some two pairs of tracks that looked like they were left by a deer and a boar. Going to go track them and get some venison and pork to eat for the night. Also you're going to be practice hitting targets on trees I put up along the way. Merle gets bored while waiting so he does target practice when things get slow." He explained to me without any insulting remarks towards me. He must really take this stuff seriously.

"Hunting? Never thought I'd do that. Okay lead the way." I say.

* * *

We walk into the woods quietly and I can't tell if it's because we are hunting now or just because we didn't feel like talking. Not that I mind, it's a comforting silence between us. Occasionally he would speak up to tell me to watch out for a trap he set up or stop me if he heard something but other than we didn't really talk. After walking for what felt like an hour we reached a part of the woods that I guess he and Merle hung out at while hunting. There were makeshift targets on trees, a backpack leaning against a tree and there were some beer cans littered among the ground that I assume were Merles though I have no idea where he would have gotten them.

"So this is where you Merle disappeared to yesterday." I say.

"Yep. We searched these woods for food and geeks and eventual just set up camp here. The squirrels are most active around here and the tracks left from the deer and boar are just up ahead. Now let's see what you brought other than the throwing knives he said."

I took off my backpack and pulled out the bow and arrows, and took the knife out of my boot. He held out his hand to judge the knife and I handed it to him.

"This is a nice one." He said as he flipped it open. "Got the tip that helps with gutting, guess you got the box with all the good stuff."

"Guess so. So should I start with the throwing knives?" I ask.

"Whatever. Take that tree right there, the one without any marks on its target."

I see where he is pointing and make my way over. The target looks just like a dart board. I look down and see a mark in the dirt that shows where you're supposed to stand. I stand straight, lock eyes with the target, grab a knife out of the belt and throw it. I hear a thunk as it hits the tree and see that it did in fact hit the tree but it landed along the edge and not in the middle.

"Damn!"

"Honestly I'm surprised it went that far, let alone hit the tree. You've had experience with this before?" he asked.

"Not with throwing knives but I would spend a fair share of time in bars with friends or waiting for Reese to get done with her shift. I would play darts because I needed something to do since I was usually voted to be the sober one and keep people out of trouble."

"Been there with Merle. Anyway you need to adjust your form a little bit. You have handle heavy knives so you need to throw it by the blade. Slightly bend your wrist, put your weight on your dominant leg, bend at your elbow so that the knife is raised by your head but keep it a good distance from your head so you don't cut yourself."

I take his advice. Putting all the weight on my right leg and resting my left in front of me I raise knife up to my head and swing it forward. I watch it spin before it sinks into the target, landing dead center.

"Fuck yeah!" I say with a small fist pump. Daryl looks at me with a raised eyebrow.

"Sorry, I'm a sore winner."

"Don't apologize. What's up with you today? You're not acting like yourself." He said.

"I don't know what you mean. What's my normal self?"

"More confident, acts tough and you speak your mind not worrying about what anyone else thinks of you, kind of obnoxious but for some reason the others like you well enough. Now you're apologizing for stuff you shouldn't and you're not bantering with me today."

"You've been observing me haven't you?"

"It's a hunter thing. You have to be observant about your surroundings and who you're with. And you haven't been the same since you woke up this morning." If any other guy said that they were watching me because it was a hunter thing I would call bullshit on them but with Daryl he's so serious about it that it might be true.

"Okay if you're so curious I didn't get the best night's sleep last night. It sounds childish but I had a nightmare and it really got to me. I don't want to talk about it though; I just want to keep practicing if that's alright with you." I say. He looks at me like he's trying to read me and I give him my best I'm serious face because there was no way I wanted to talk about it. I just want to forget it.

"I'm not your damn shrink. Don't have to tell me nothing. Keep throwing for a little bit and then we'll move to the bow." He said. I nod, grab a knife and throw it at my target.

* * *

After about twenty knife throws I stop to check my progress. I didn't hit it dead on every single time but I did have a good amount of cuts near the center and only a few outside the lines. The only time I missed completely was when Daryl thought there was a squirrel to shoot and I lost my footing because the sound of his crossbow going off startled me. He gave me a pretty long lecture about focusing and I could tell he was amused by my fall so I flipped him off.

"Well, looks like your becoming your old self again" and I was. I guess taking my stress out on all this practice was lightening my mood, like how I always felt tired but satisfied after a hard workout or a long night of developing and editing photos. That mood however was threatening to fade away when I tried the bow. God that thing was a pain in the ass. I kept having trouble holding it steady and any time I let the string go I would feel a pain in my shoulder. Daryl I realized had a tough love approach when it came to teaching. He kept yelling at me anytime I would miss and he called me stupid a couple of times I got hit in the face when I released the arrow. God that hurts so much!

"Let's take a break! We've been at this for a while and obviously we aren't communicating!" I say dropping the bow and go to my backpack. I really needed to get some water and eat a protein bar because I missed breakfast. I unzipped my bag and pulled out the bottle I had opened earlier for my pills and took a long drink. I pulled out the other one and tossed it to Daryl who caught it with no problems.

"So how long have you been hunting?" I asked him.

"You gave up with the bow to get my life story?"

"No because I really do need a break and I thought I might as well be polite and make small talk." I say and then take another sip of water.

"Been doing it since as long as I can remember. My family did it and where I grew up there wasn't that much to do other than hunting."

"That's kind of cool. You had a shared interest." As I said that I saw a look of anger in his eyes. Maybe his family was a sore subject. "My family was so different we couldn't agree on anything. My mom liked girly stuff; dad liked motorcycles, and my sister liked video games and music. I tried to be interested in my mom's stuff for her sake but I always gravitated toward my dad's and Reese's interests. Instead of being a proper young woman I grew up to be a tomboy."

"That's why I don't get how you and Amy got close." Daryl said as he pulled out some beef jerky. "You two seem like polar opposites."

"Well we do have some things in common. Both of us are the youngest out of sisters with a large age gap and we're around the same age."

"Age don't mean shit. You may be physically the same age but mentally she acts younger. I would have thought she was around seventeen instead of her twenties."

"Using big words now I'm impressed." I say with a sly smile and pull out a protein bar to eat. He gave me a dirty look for that but I didn't give him the chance to say something about it. "But that doesn't matter; I've always managed to find common ground with people different from me. Sure we didn't have a lot in common nor did we become best friends but we could enjoy each other's company and see how the other half lives. I think with Amy it's more of a need for normalcy. We can talk about college and similar young adult experiences and forget about the fact that we live in a world where the dead come back to eat you."

"That's something that you should never forget. You need to watch your back and that girl is too over protected by her sister, the old man and the others. At least you know to be guarded, can't say I met a lot of women like that."

"Well maybe you just haven't met a lot of women Dixon. I've met plenty of women who could take care of themselves."

"Maybe. You are the first I've met who acts like this."

"Like what exactly?" I was genuinely curious about what he thought of me.

At that moment we heard a twig snap and we went quiet. He picked up his cross-bow and I grabbed my knife that was lying beside the rock I was sitting on. We quietly made our way towards the noise, crouching behind trees and shrubs. There in front of us was the deer that Daryl must have been tracking. He put a finger to his lips and aimed his crossbow at it. I felt bad that we were about to kill this innocent life that never hurt anyone but we had to eat. Look at me, when it comes to killing walking corpses and attacking people I can do it with ease but the thought of killing an animal is what makes me feel bad. Something catches my eye as I'm staring at the deer it was at the end of my vision but I was still able to see it. I look over and see that it was a lone geek quietly making its way towards us. I looked over real quick to see that Daryl still had his eyes on the deer. Damn, I don't want to distract him but I don't know what would happen if I let this go. I reach for a throwing my knife from my belt and hope to god that what I learned today would be good enough from this far away. In a flash I quickly get up and throw the knife at it, it hits its target in the head, the deer runs off and the next thing I know I'm being pinned to the ground for the second day in a row. Except instead of being strangled by a delusional stranger I have an angry hunter shouting profanities at me.

"Why the hell did you do that? I almost had it and you went and ruined it!" he yelled as I tried to worm my way out from under him.

"Get off of me! I wasn't going to just sit here and give that thing time to find us!"

"Who knows if it would have found us? I could have taken care of it after I shot the god damn deer!"

"Fine! I could have handled it better, now would you get off already!" I shout.

"You know what you wanted to know how to handle yourself and since this is the second time you are in this position maybe you should how to get out yourself!"

Great, now he was going to make this a lesson. I tried knee him in the groin but he saw that coming and is now sitting on top of me making my legs useless. I try to get my arms out of his tight grip but I'm having little success with that too. So now I guess I need to find his weakness. I look up at him and realize just how close he is. He's breathing heavily on top of my and I can smell the beef jerky that he was eating earlier. Gross. His sandy hair is slightly damp and there is a gloss of sweat on his skin. There was a part of me that found this situation slightly erotic and I was internally cursing myself for thinking this way. When I look in his eyes I see the deep pools of blue clouded with rage and something else that I realized I could use to my advantage. He was uncomfortable being so close to me. Daryl doesn't like getting close with people and being this close and having to touch me was probably freaking him out. So the idea of intimacy must scare the shit out of him.

"You know as fun as this is this isn't my favorite position." I say suppressing the gag that wanted to come out of my mouth and try to put on my best seductive face (Obviously I'm not very good at this). His eyes are suddenly filled with shock and his grip loosens slightly.

"What the hell are you…" before he could finish I sweep myself out from under him, roll him over and now I'm straddling him.

"Now this is more like it." I say as I arch my back a bit and lean over him so our eyes lock. His are filled with a lot emotion and before I could read which one it is he pushes me off him and I land on the dirt ground hard.

"What the fuck was that all about!" He says as he gets up, grabs his cross-bow and starts pacing. Wow that really got to him for some reason.

"Doing what you said, finding a way out. I saw an opening, went for it and I got the upper hand." I explain.

He stops pacing and looks at me. "So that's it. That's why you did it? You're just going flirt your way out of everything?"

"That's why I did it but it's not necessarily how I'm going to get out of everything. You just don't seem to like the idea of being vulnerable to anyone so I took advantage of it. And I'm not going to lie it was kind of fun." I say with a sly smile on my face.

"Whatever." He says and goes over to get my throwing knife. He pries it out of the skull and wipes the blood off on his shirt. "I won't deny that your aim has improved a lot. I just wanna know how you saw it from where we were?" He asked wanting to change the subject.

"Being a photographer is kind of like being a hunter in some way. You have to always be observant to get the perfect shot. You notice things like shadows, natural lighting…" as I list off stuff I see a pig walking behind Daryl who is still focusing on what I'm talking about and obviously shaken by what happened earlier "the boar that is absent-mindedly wandering around behind you…" at that moment he whips his head and crossbow around and shoots the pig right in the eye. It lets out a pitiful scream as it falls to the ground.

"Really Dixon! You sure know how to kill a moment." I say with a look of disgust on my face.

"You see me as killing a moment, I see it as killing dinner. That's what's different between you and me." He says with a smirk on his face as he tosses my knife back to me and goes to collect the boar. I get up and start to make my way back to camp.

"Where you going? You're not going to help me skin it or are you too squeamish about that stuff?" He shouts towards me.

I turn around and let out a small laugh. "Dixon we've been out here for a long time. I'm tired, bruised and we both look like we've been rolling around in the dirt."

"So?"

"So? Wow you're kind of thick aren't you? Dixon if we go back at the same time looking like this it doesn't matter if we have that thing, people are going to think we were hooking up in the woods and I don't know about you but I want to avoid all the dirty thoughts Merle's going to vocalize once he sees us."

He didn't argue with me on that one. He just stood there deep in thought before he spoke again.

"Fine, don't forget your stuff and remember we came from that way." He said pointing in the direction we came from. I kind of did forget which way we came from but I wasn't going to admit it. I grab my bag and shove my discarded bow and arrow in my bag. Before I leave a thought came to me and I smiled evilly before I turned back and said.

"You know Dixon, if ever do want to hook up all you have to do is ask." I say and laugh before making my way back to camp. He was probably cursing me out now but I just kept smiling.

* * *

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter. This was supposed to be a fun one where Natalie and Daryl get to spend time together without anyone else and I'm also still trying to decide what type of weapon Natalie will use the most. I've been wanting them to have some alone time together and start to form some type of relationship (even though Daryl is very reluctant to do so and Natalie kind of is too but not as much as Daryl is). I'm also setting up more background for Natalie's character with the dreams and her medication which will be explored more throughout the story (I'm thinking of putting flashbacks in from time to time). **

**As always feel free to favorite, follow and leave a comment.**


	7. Tensions Rise

**Dislcaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead or any of it's characters.**

**From now on I'll be responding to comments and posting updates towards the end of the story.**

* * *

Chapter 7

When I got back to camp it was probably around nine or ten in the morning because everyone was awake. I got some stares as I walked back to the camp probably because of my appearance and the fact that I'm actually awake this early but they didn't last too long until they went back to their work. This is what I was hoping for and why I wanted to come back separately from Daryl, one person coming out of the woods looking a little ruffed up is suspicious enough but if two people come out at the same time and then the rumors go flying. I saw Dale setting something up on the tree stump in the middle of camp so I went to go see what it was.

"Whatch ya got there?"

"We have some CB radios lying around so I thought I could set this one up so we can keep in touch when people go out on runs. It should also help us get in contact with people passing by… good lord Natalie! What have you been up to!" he interrupts himself when he's the state I'm in.

"Oh this? It's really no big deal Dale. I've been having trouble sleeping for a while, I'm sure most of us are, and I went out into the woods for a work out and to practice working with some weapons."

"You look like you got beat up! Who else was out there with you?"

"Relax Dale; I don't want you to make a big fuss over nothing. I got these wounds because a bow is trickier to work than all those movies make it out to be. I also may have tripped over some roots every now and then but I'm seriously fine." I lied about the last part. Dale is just getting used to the idea of having Daryl and Merle around and the last thing he needed was to know I was alone with one of them.

"Did you hit every branch along the way?" Shane asked as he Lori approached us.

"No I hit every other one. It's boring if it gets too repetitive." I say sarcastically. Apparently he didn't appreciate my humor because he didn't crack a smile. So much for Daryl's thoughts that people like me even though I'm obnoxious.

"This is no joke Natalie. A young woman shouldn't be out there by herself. You could have been seriously injured or even killed and no one would have known." Lori said. I was trying real hard to suppress rolling my eyes. Lori sounded like one of those women who were brainwashed into thinking they were the weaker sex and needed a man around all the time. It also didn't help that she hasn't been keeping an eye on her son lately and I doubt he's trained to handle any danger like a man would. I have a feeling we would be disagreeing a lot but I didn't want to get off on the wrong foot with her. I'd rather just keep my list of people I piss off to only have Ed and possibly Shane on it.

"Okay Lori I'll leave a note or tell someone next time. But don't expect me to bring a guy with me anytime I need to pee in the woods. I can handle myself and I prefer to keep some things private."

"Natalie I need you stop fooling around and be serious." Shane interrupted. "I know you're a decent asset to the group but you've also been acting like a loose cannon. Bringing back Jim, a total stranger to our camp even though he attacked you."

"Who told you that?"

"Morales and Jacqui mentioned it when I asked if we could trust him and those marks on your neck are a dead giveaway. You're wandering into the woods alone without telling anyone and you act like everything is fine when it isn't. What about your sister? Have you thought of her at all since you got here?"

Ok now I was angry. How dare he say that I'm not taking anything seriously when I have done nothing but try to help out since I got here and how dare he bring up my sister like I don't think about her all the time. She's haunting my dreams for god sakes!

"How dare you bring up my sister you cazzo piegato naso pezzo di merda! Of course I've been thinking about her ever since I got here, I've been thinking about how to find her whenever I'm not volunteering to go on runs, watch the kids with Amy or do what I can to help take care of this group that took me in! The reason I brought Jim here is because he's like a lot of us. Lost everything and had no idea where to go. But I have no idea if you feel like that because you've been so busy trying to control everything that I don't know you. Who have you lost Shane? Who have you been thinking about ever since this all happened? Who is someone you wish you could have done more to save!" I yelled at him. More people were watching us but I really didn't give a shit at the moment.

"I've lost people I cared about to! The only difference is I know they are gone. I had to leave my comatose partner in his hospital bed when the hospital was ambushed by those things! I couldn't find his heartbeat and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't save him. And now Lori and Carl lost a husband and father and I lost my best friend." He yelled back at me. He was breathing heavy and I could see the anger in his eyes. He must have been holding this in for a long time and now that he let it out he had this crazed look in his eyes. I heard sobbing and turned my head to see Carl crying. I also say that Lori was fighting off tears. Shane walked off and I was left with Lori standing in front of me. Crap.

"Lori, I didn't know. I'm…" She waved me off and went to go comfort her son.

Fuck! Why did I let my temper get the better of me! Now Carl was crying over his father, Lori over her husband and I even felt bad now that I went off on Shane, but I guess we've been holding on to these emotions long enough and we started to reach our limit. He felt bad that he didn't do more to save his partner and I felt bad that I didn't have a plan to find Reese. I just stood there feeling bad until I felt Dale put a hand on my shoulder.

"Why don't you go find Amy and go down to the water to clean up. You look like you could use it and I'd feel better if you had company. Andrea and Carol are going down there to do laundry so maybe you can help them too once you're done."

"Yeah, that sounds like a good idea." I say as I walk toward Amy. I could hear people whispering to each other and I heard Merle loudly ask if I placed some kind of hex on Shane when I wasn't speaking English earlier. We start walking toward my car so we can grab some stuff from my box labeled bathroom.

"So what happened with Shane? Well I mean the part we couldn't understand. You didn't put some type of curse on him like Merle said did you."

"No nothing like that. I think that I channeled the spirit of my grandmother for a minute because I when I get really mad I sometimes curse in Italian. She'd be shocked I did that but my grandpa would be proud."

"Well what did you say?

"I basically called him a fucking bent nose piece of shit." She starts laughing at that and tries to cover her mouth to stop but once I started laughing we couldn't stop. I'm sure Shane was glaring at us but he was hanging awfully close to Lori and Carl. He's got nerve to judge me when he's basically trying to claim his partner's family before his body is even cold. He may have cared about his partner and he obviously cares for Lori and Carl but that doesn't change the fact that he's probably been lusting after her before her husband's accident and they are most likely forming a relationship after only three days of leaving home. We got to my car and popped the trunk to look through the stuff. I was looking for the box I had moved earlier while Amy was looking through the boxes of clothes.

"Hey you think I could ever borrow some of these. I'm running low on clothes because they need to be washed and a lot of these look cute and practical." She says holding up a tank top with a sweet heart neckline.

"Go for it. Most of these are mine and Reese's combined and I'll doubt I wear all of them before I need to do laundry." I say. Grabbing a pair of shorts and a muscle tank top to change into once I'm finished washing off. My jeans and shirt got very dirty in the woods and it was also getting a little hot out.

"Woah these are… something." She said as she holds up strappy red stiletto shoe.

"Yeah those are Reese's. She wore them for her nightclub job. High heels are my sworn enemy though, I can't walk steady in a pair that is more than an inch or two long. These look like there meant more for attacking people than walking." I say with a laugh.

"So what? Are you just going to carry that around now and kill geeks with the heel?" Amy asked smiling. I guess this was becoming slightly normal for her to talk about now.

"Hey you never know. This could probably do a lot more damage than a knife or Daryl's crossbow." I say and we both laugh. She then gets a gleam in her eye as she thinks about what to bring up next but she's interrupted by a certain southern loud mouth.

"Hey sweethearts. Going to go get a bath? Need a big strong man to make sure you don't get attacked by snakes?" Merle said with his typical perverted look on his face. Amy tensed at the word snakes but I just rolled my eyes.

"We're good Merle. And why do I have a feeling the last thing you would be looking for is snakes?"

"Guess I'm busted." He said holding his hands up in the air. "If you're in the water getting all nice and clean I don't think I'd be looking anywhere else." He said and went back to his truck and went inside to get something out of the glove compartment. Amy let out a sigh.

"God he's so gross. When you guys were out he wouldn't stop making comments about Andrea's boobs."

"Well I can't argue with the guy there. She's got a little more to offer in that department than me." I say referring to fact I'm usually classified as more thin and slightly muscular than curvy. "Anyway she can handle herself, just let me know if he said anything to you that is worth castrating him for."

"Not really, the most he does is call me sweetheart before Andrea comes by and protects me like a mother lion. Then he hits on her. I think he finds me too immature. Based on how he hits on you and Andrea he seems to like the feisty." We both laugh at that. "Out of curiosity do you ever wonder what it would be like if you didn't vouch for them to stay?" She asks. I pause from collecting towels and soap from my car to think about it. Oddly enough I never thought about it. It just feels almost natural that they're here, like they're supposed to be here.

"Well… I'm sure they would be able to take care of themselves just fine. The camp would probably be a lot quieter. But in the moment it just felt right to let them stay. They did save me after all and they aren't the worst people I ever met. Well Merle can be asshole and a pervert but it's I'm used to guys like that. Daryl's quiet and keeps to himself but when he does speak it's usually some zingers at me but other than that he's a good hunter, protector and he's brutally honest which I find better than pretty little lies. So I guess I feel I did the right thing and hopefully get some good karma out of it." Amy looks at me with a suspicion on her face but before I can call her out on it loudmouth interrupts us again.

"You ever want company just let me know. I could use a bath myself and some extra hands would be nice." He says as he smokes a cigarette. We both roll our eyes and I let out a sigh.

"Although I will admit that he does make me question my sanity when he says stuff like that and reminds me I basically signed myself up for this." I go back in the trunk and pull out two swimsuits of the car and hand Amy one. "We should wear these in case someone tries to walk in on us."

* * *

"So I didn't want to say anything in front of Dale but I couldn't help but notice that Daryl isn't around now either. Did you exercising involve him?" She asked as we were walking along the water looking for a good spot to swim where we wouldn't have to worry about anyone interrupting us.

"Oh god Amy no! You're a little pervert aren't you?" I say. It's always the sweet looking ones you have to look out for.

"Hey you're the one that went there. I just asked if he was with you this morning." She said with a gleam in her eye. Damn, I guess there's no point in lying to her.

"Fair enough, I'll admit my mind usually ends up in the gutter from time to time. I'll tell you what happened, just don't go talking about it to people. Daryl and I went hunting this morning. And by hunting I mean he mostly instructed me on how to throw knives and yell at me for not understanding how a bow works."

"Well it looks like maybe something a little more went on but I won't pursue that anymore. What I'm more interest in is how close you too have been these past few days." Oh god why was Amy such a romantic! Her dreams about princes on white horses rescuing damsels in distress definitely did not apply to me and Daryl. We managed to find a decent enough place to swim so I started to remove my clothes and put on my swimsuit with Amy keeping watch for others.

"Oh god Amy! It's really nothing like you think is going happening. Me and Daryl aren't interest in each other like that, he's rude, feral, older and different than the guys I've usually dated. Besides three days is not enough time to fall in love despite what Romeo and Juliet tells readers."

"Oh please. Daryl may be about decade older but it's not like your underage and you act more mature than most people I've met. And what do you mean about Romeo and Juliet falling in love in three days?"

"In English we established a timeline for Romeo and Juliet. On the first day Romeo is so heartbroken about being rejected by another girl he and his friends go to the ball where he meets Juliet. He's obviously in lust with her at first sight and she's being pressured to think about marriage. Add the fact that their parents forbid it makes them want it more so he stalks her outside her garden looking at her and thinking dirty things and yes they are dirty if you translate them, but she wants to get married first so they agree to get married the next day. Day two is when they get married, he kills her cousin and they consummate their marriage that night. Day three he is banished and when she is forced by her parents to marry Paris she fakes her own death to get out of it. And you know the rest it all goes wrong and they both die in the end. Can you really say you ever fell in love with someone you just met so hard you would be willing to do all that in three days?" I'm done putting on my swimsuit by then and Amy is just looking at me speechless. Ok I may have gone on a rampage about why Romeo and Juliet is not my favorite classic so I wouldn't blame her for thinking I was crazy. She starts to change into her swimsuit when she answers me.

"No I can't say I have but I also think you are avoiding my first question by going on this unnecessary rant and are very cynical when it comes to romance."

"You bet I am!" I say and run into the water before she can question me any further. I heard her laugh and shout for me to wait for her but I'm already under water and enjoying the calming effects of just floating without a care in the world.

* * *

I never realized how much I missed swimming until now. Sure I never got to do it a lot but I always remember getting so excited for summer and taking day trips to the beach. Some of my best memories were at the beach. More specifically the one where it was a beautiful but hot day in May when I was in second grade and my mom pulled me and Reese out of school to drive down to Jacobs Riis Park beach. I loved the spontaneous trips my mom would do because we couldn't afford to take vacations to places like Disney world like all the other kids in my class would talk about or even leave tri-state area. It didn't matter that we would change and sleep in her station wagon because we had so much fun swimming in the water, playing tag and eating ham and cheese sandwiches and drinking sodas that she would pack in a cooler. At the end of the day we sat huddled together on the roof of her car and watch the watch the sunset. I remember looking up at her and seeing her about to cry.

_"Mommy what's wrong?" my eight year old self asked her. She snapped out of her trance and wiped her tears away. _

"_Nothing baby. I'm just moved by how beautiful this all is and how I get to share it with the best girls in the world." She said and held me and Reese closer to her. I believed her because anytime she hugged me like this I felt like I was in the safest place in the world. Reese however could tell something was off._

"_So how long are you going to be with us? When do we get back to nonni and grandpa?" We were living with them at the time because mom was in recovery from her last health scare and she was just discharged that day. We would be returned to her care once she gets back to her secretary job in Manhattan. We were living in Brooklynn. _

"_We'll be leaving in a little bit but they said I can spend the night there. I'll make chocolate chip pancakes in the morning. Just the way you girls like them." She says smiling. It was a sad smile though. She hasn't had a genuine happy smile since my dad died. I didn't know at the time that she was trying to date but they never worked out well because no matter how beautiful my mom was they couldn't take the pressure of two daughters and her fragile state. After this day though she would catch the eye of someone who I cannot stand to think about. _

"_Yay!" I shout to which Mom and Reese laugh and hug me close. _

"_You know you girls are my everything. You're both so strong and beautiful. I know you two are going to do great things one day and find your place in this big world. So whenever you are feeling down in the dumps or maybe you get so successful you forget about the little things in life I want you to remember this day. Where we didn't have a care in the world, swam all day and watched the sunset and know that I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. Just never stop searching and reaching for what you want." _

"_We won't mom. It's like you said we are dad's kids, stubborn as mules." Reese said._

"_Yes you are. I see him in both your eyes. If I ever loose either of you I don't think I could survive." She said and that sad lifeless look reappeared in her eyes. I look at her and put my hand on her check._

"_You won't mamma. I'll never leave you." I say._

"_Oh I know that my sweet baby. I mean if I can't be the strong mother you deserve." She said._

* * *

I'm brought back to reality when I feel someone flip me from my back and I submerge in the water. I resurface and push my hair out of my face to find Amy giggling at me.

"Hey! That's not funny!" I say

"Sorry, but I said your name like five times and you weren't snapping out of it. Were you thinking about you know who?" She asked with a smile.

"Why would I be thinking about Voldemort? He may be sexy but he's pure evil." She rolled her eyes at that comment.

"No not him you dork. I'm talking about certain cross-bow wielding sex god."

"Sex god? Amy, are you sure I'm the one that's interested in him?" I tease. She looked shocked at what she said and started shaking her head.

"No I just said that to bug you! But I won't deny that out of the group he and Shane are the more attractive ones." She says and I see a light blush as she mentions Shane. I stop myself from saying anything negative about him knowing that it would probably upset her if I say he wants to get it on with Lori.

"I don't know, I haven't gotten to know T-dog yet and I'm sure Merle can be charming when he wants to be." We both simultaneously say ew after that and both laugh.

"But in all seriousness what is it about Daryl that makes you overreact? And don't say it's because you don't believe in love at first sight because I already know that but I also know there's something else."

"Honestly it's because I can't get a good read on him. It sounds silly but I have always been able to get a good read on people and I follow my gut on whether or not I should pursue forming connections. It's helped me throughout most of my life even if it hasn't always been foolproof. I try not to be like my sister who falls head over heels in love so fast and always ends things in a mess. So I just would date guys and decide how serious it would be based on how I read them and got to know them. The only really bad relationship I had was the one before I moved here because I ignored my gut telling me there was something off about him. After that I just decided that the next guy I wanted to date would be a nice, funny, level head guy with maybe a touch of geeky. " I say. She gives me a look of understanding.

"And Daryl doesn't seem to be any of those traits. You make some good points there. But just remember that right now we're running short on guys and I call dibs on the next cute one to come by." She says as she swims back to shore to help Andrea and the others with laundry. I just smile and go back to floating on my back. There was something else I didn't tell Amy. That even though I couldn't get a good read on Daryl because he was constantly surprising I was curious about him because I feel like even though we lived two different worlds I see a part of him that reminds me of myself.

* * *

I finally get out of the water and dried off my body with a towel I had laying on a rock. Now I'm in the middle of combing out my tangled wet hair. I'm trying really hard to work on getting out a big knot when I hear someone behind me. I turn around expecting Amy but I'm pleasantly surprised to see that it's Sophia and Eliza. They are a good distance away from like they need permission to come over here.

"It's okay. You guys can come over here. Why aren't you with Carl and Louis?" I asked with a gentle voice and a smile.

"They're trying to catch frogs. They're gross and slimy." Sophia said and they both made disgusted faces at that. I laughed because they looked so cute right now.

"Yeah they do feel kind of weird when you hold them. And they don't turn into princes when you kiss them." That got more ews out of them. "I'm just finishing combing my hair. What do you guys want to do?"

"Can we braid your hair? Its so long and pretty." Eliza asked and I could see that their eyes light up at the idea. I never understood some girls fascination with braiding hair but if they wanted to do it that was totally fine with me.

"Go for it. I got a hair tie right here and it would be nice to have it out of my face."

They both had the biggest smiles on their faces when they came over and took the comb out of my hands. The girls were going into an in depth conversation about what type of braid they should do and it made me smile that they were having so much fun. It was especially nice to see Sophia so happy because I'm still scarred by the images of her being attacked last night. I'm not sure why out of all the kids it had to be her but I needed to get over it because. They had just combed out my hair and separated it into two chunks over my shoulders when I heard them gasp.

"You have a big tattoo on your back" Eliza stated.

"Yeah, those are falcon wings. I got them because my last name means falcon and my parents always said it was a sign of strength for the family." I could feel there small fingers trace patterns over my shoulder blades where the tattoo was spread out.

"Didn't it hurt?" Eliza asked.

"Yeah at times it did. I got certain parts of it done on certain days so I didn't have to get it all at once."

"My daddy says women who have tattoos are nothing but trouble. He calls them something bad that mommy tells me not to say. But you don't seem like a bad girl." Sophia said. I sighed thinking about how her dad called me a harlot.

"Tattoos don't always have the best reputation but haven't you ever heard the expression don't judge a book by its cover?" they nod their heads. "That's about people too, just because I have tattoos it doesn't mean I'm a bad girl and if you don't have tattoos it doesn't mean always mean you're a good girl. What you look like on the outside or how or present yourself doesn't always represent how you are on the inside. Just don't mention this tattoo to anyone, especially your daddy Sophia." I'm not ashamed of it, it's just I don't need Ed to have any more excuses to call me a harlot. They nod their heads again and start braiding my hair. They keep trying to take turns but it keeps falling out any time they switch who does it. In the end Eliza's brother is calling for her so Sophia got to finish it.

"What do you think?" She asked. I had to admit that it was better than anything I would have done with it. I think it was a French twist or something similar to it and it felt really secure so I knew it wouldn't fall out for a long time.

"I love it. It feels good, looks good from what I can see and way better than anything I could have done." I say as I put on my muscle tank and shorts. She smiles at me and says something while I'm putting on my boots.

"I wish I could be like you." I look up at her and see that she's in shock by what she said and tries to look away from me.

"It's ok Soph, can I call you Soph?" I asked and she nods. "Why would you want to be like me? Being you seems like a lot of fun."

"Why? You're all grown up. You're strong, nice and brave like mommy. I think mommy and daddy would like me better if I was a little brave like you." She has a sad look on her face. I didn't know much about her but I know her mom must be a saint for being able to put up with Ed for so long. I wonder though if she knows Sophia feels this way. From what I've seen she's more attentive to Sophia than Lori is to Carl and she's tries to make sure she's not around Ed during his mood swings.

"Hey don't be too hard on yourself. Remember your dad doesn't like me that much and your mom obviously loves you so much. You're her sweet little girl, a mother's dream daughter. And don't think you aren't brave, you've been through a lot and are still able to smile real pretty and have fun with Eliza, Carl and Louis. That's a big accomplishment in my opinion." Once I'm done she looks into my eyes and I give her the most genuine smile I could. Growing up is always a bitch but having to deal with this and have low self-confidence is a lot for a little girl. She smiles back at me and my heart melts.

"Okay, I'll be better. Come with me to see mommy. I know she'll like you." She grabs my hand and walks me over to others. Andrea and Carol look up to see us and I see Carol smile at how happy Sophia is. Andrea however looks like she doesn't know what to think of me, I guess she's upset over what happened earlier.

"You two look like you were having fun." Carol spoke to Sophia. She gave her mom a hug.

"Natalie let me braid her hair. What do you think?"

"It looks wonderful dear. You did a great job."

"Hey Sophia I think Carl was looking for you. Why don't you go play with the others while us women talk." Andrea said. I had a feeling she was going to speak her mind about earlier but didn't want Sophia around for it.

"Okay. She's really cool mom." She says as she runs off. Cool, I had a little groupie.

"I hope she's not bothering you. She's really sweet and shy so I'm surprised she's being so open with you." Carol said.

"Don't worry about it. Sophia is a sweetheart and I'm a complete softy when it comes to kids. Adults are a completely different story sometimes." They both laugh at that. It's one of the few times I've seen Carol not anxious, I wish she didn't act like a deer in the headlights all the time because she looks pretty when she's happy.

"She's a really great girl Carol and she loves you a lot. She lights up when she talks about you." When I say this Carol looks at me with a lot of gratitude. She also gets a look of horror and is probably about to ask us what Sophia actually said when Andrea interrupts us.

"Natalie about earlier…" Here we go. "I get that you're probably offended by what Shane said to you and I understand your want to help out and be independent but he has his heart in the right place. He just wants to protect us, it's part of being a cop." Oh great, Andrea probably had a thing for Shane to. What is it about him that attracts women so much? He just seems like a control freak for me who has a weird tendency to rub his head a lot. I want to like Andrea because she's Amy's sister and she seemed pretty decent the first night we met but I'm not going to censor myself if she disagrees with me.

"Look, I do feel bad about what happened to his partner and Lori's husband but that doesn't mean I'm going to agree with everything he says. Just because he may have his heart in the right place it doesn't mean that everything he says and does is what's right. I don't care that he was a cop that doesn't mean he can just make himself the head of the group and try to control every little thing, we should all have a say. If he tells me to do something I don't think is rational I'm going to argue with him. Especially when it comes to my sister."

"I understand, I'd do the same if it was Amy but the fact is that none us have dealt with anything like this and Shane has been out there…"

"Shane has just as much experience with them as us! Last time I checked not even cops had experience with geeks before the breakout happened. He's no better than you me or anyone else in the camp but you don't see any of us ordering people around." I say that a little too loud and I see the look that Andrea and Carol are giving me. They are afraid I'm going to snap and go on a rampage. "Look maybe I'm not going to be much help here, I'll go see what the kids are up to." I say as I get up and walk away.

"Natalie!" I hear Andrea call out. I turn around to hear what she has to say.

"Don't think that I don't agree with you on some of what you're saying. I want to help out with runs and stuff too. I just try to remember that yelling isn't going to resolve anything." She says in her lawyer tone of voice. I nod and walk away suppressing the urge to yell thanks mom. People always say yelling doesn't solve anything but they always change their minds in the heat of the moment.

* * *

The next few days aren't very eventful. I mostly helped out with the kids and would tell Dale when I'm going to woods for a while. Sometimes he'd have T-dog join me and he would usually crack jokes or make small talk with me while I practiced throwing knives and got the hang of my bow. He was nice though, very religious and would talk about how he used to drive the church bus for the elderly. Other times Daryl was already in the woods hunting and Dale told me I could just go as long as Shane didn't see. Something I didn't have to worry about so much since he and Lori would disappear into the woods more often. One of the things that changed was the group didn't interact with me as much. Sure I had Amy, Dale, the kids and sometimes a Dixon brother that would make a comment towards me but the rest of the group avoided me. Jacqui stopped talking to me completely, Andrea would just tell me when Amy or Dale were looking for me, Jim was always working on a car, the Morales' would be civil with me if they had to and Carol was usually steered away from my direction from Ed who keeps threatening me to stay away from his family. I guess he thinks I'm going to corrupt Sophia.

One evening I was just sitting on a tree stump examining some arrows when Dale came up to talk to me.

"Hey Dale, how long do you think I'm going to be isolated because of what happened?" I asked him.

"It's not really an isolation Natalie. There all just a little uncomfortable and confused. If anything I think there torn over whom they agree with more." He said trying to cheer me up.

"Nice try Dale but I know they side with Shane. Who wouldn't, he's a small town cop who's rising to the occasion and becoming the hero they all need and I'm just a damaged girl with no filter"

"Natalie you know that's not true! Since I've met you in that diner on one of your worst days you still didn't strike me as someone who was broken. You've been proving yourself to be an independent young woman every day. You brought food back, you saved Jim from breaking down and you make sure you're always prepared for anything to happen. Sometimes it's just easier to side with someone who thinks they have all the answers."

"Thanks Dale and I get that. I wouldn't want to be in the position Shane is in. It's too much pressure to have to care for so many people but he could at least try to get everyone's opinion on certain matters and give everyone an equal opportunity to express themselves."

"Hey I agree with you one hundred percent. Just wait another day or so and I'm sure something else will happen to make them forget all about your incident." At that moment Jim was calling Dale over to talk about the RV with him.

"Go Dale. I'll be fine. I'm glad to know I got you on my side." We both smile at that and he goes to see what Jim wants to talk about. I'm not even alone for five minutes when Merle plops himself down a couple of feet from me with a bottle of some type of liquor.

"Hey Falco. You look like you could use a drink." He said offering me the bottle with a shaky hand.

"I'm good for now Merle. It looks like you should ease up though." I said noticing that his eyes were fogging up and he looked like he could pass out any minute.

"Don't go worrying about me Falco, I know how to hold me liquor." He then lets out a loud burp and I roll my eyes and let out a laugh.

"So now I get you laughing. Hey Darylina! Stop skinning those squirrels and come have a drink with us." He yells over at Daryl who true to his word was skinning squirrels a couple feet away. He finishes up with his squirrel and sits by Merle taking the bottle and swallowed a huge gulp.

"Man Darylina you should have seen Falco that day you hunted down that boar! She was ripping Shane apart and had the fiercest look in those eyes. She really was like a falcon hunting her prey."

"You're exaggerating Merle. He just pissed me off because he thinks I'm a loose cannon for not being one of his puppets. So I went off on him, not my classiest moment."

"Wish I was here to see it." Daryl said. "That douche bag had it coming."

"Oh and how would you know? Last I checked you rarely had any interaction with him." I countered.

"Call it as I seem them. If I'm lucky I won't have to interact with him at all." He said before Merle decided to steal the conversation.

"Falco did you really put a curse on him? Because I didn't know what the hell you said."

"No Merle and if you keep this up I'm going to need a drink." I say, Daryl hands me the bottle looking at me skeptically when I take a gulp of it and pass it back. They both looked at me disbelievingly. It did burn but it actually felt nice to me.

"What? Falcos know how to swallow." I then laugh "OK bad choice of words don't get any ideas Merle. Anyway it wasn't a curse I got so mad I started swearing at him in Italian. Good thing too otherwise I probably would have been in more hot water than I already am." Merle has been laughing really hard since I said the swallow thing and was now clapping his hands while Daryl just had a smirk on his face.

"Man Falco, I like this side of you! Got to offer you a drink more often."

"Well at least someone likes this side of me. Most of the others seem to want to be as far away from me as possible." I say.

"Fuck em." Daryl said causing me to raise my eyebrow at him. "If there stupid enough to side with that asshole just because he wears a cop uniform than why would you care about what they think." He had a point there.

"You keep coming to my rescue and trying to cheer me up. Any reason why Dixon." Merle at this point had gone to the woods to pee I guess and hopefully pass out in his tent. Daryl just shrugged.

"Bad habit I guess. And you're kind of decent to have around. Not as stupid some of the others and it's kind of amusing to see you banter with Merle."

"Why Daryl, is this as close to an I like you as I'm going to get?" I tease. Though I don't mind, this is probably a big step for him even though most wouldn't consider it a step at all.

"Don't go making a big deal outta it. You're gonna make me regret it." He said with a straight face but I could see a gleam in his eye. There he goes again confusing me, it's like he opens up just a little bit and then he shuts it tight. Doesn't he know doing that only makes people more curious about him? Why can't he just be always a jackass or crazy? Then no one would want to get near him, not even me.

* * *

Third Person (Daryl)

It had been a couple days since he went hunting and trained Natalie. When he brought back the boar and a couple of squirrels he could tell something was different. There was a tension in the air, not among the kids though who were mindlessly playing but among the adults. Everyone at the camp was trying to avoid contact with Shane and Natalie, who would be glaring at each other from time to time. Merle would later fill him in on how the old man freaked out when he saw how beat up Natalie looked and Shane and that Grimes chick told her off for not being careful. She held her own though and talked back to them, even though it ended with something about the woman's husband being dead and people were upset. Ever since then Natalie only had contact with the younger blonde, the old man and the kids.

He thought the whole thing was stupid. Natalie was with him the entire time and now she's taking all this crap because she didn't want them to know and assume they were together. He didn't understand why she wasn't dragging him into to it to try to save her own skin. Did she not want to be associated with him like a lot of people he had met in the past or was she doing this to protect him? He ruled out the first one because he knew that Natalie didn't care about stuff like that. He also remembered how she said she saw his vulnerability when he was pinning her down. Something that he was still angry at himself about because he never shows that part to anyone, not even his own brother. But maybe because she saw that she decided to leave him out of it, because he didn't want anyone in his business and if they knew that if they were hanging out more it would cause talk. Or maybe he had just a little too much of the whiskey that Merle kept in the glove compartment.

He was skinning squirrels by one of the trees at the camp when he saw the old man talk to Natalie. She was examining some arrows for the bow she insisted on learning to use. He had to admit that she was getting better with it the few times he was able to supervise her training. Although most of the time she had the black guy, T-dog or something, with her because the men insisted that she have someone with her when she went training. Merle would voice his opinions about how it disgusted him that they were spending time together to Daryl and anyone who would listen. That would cause some trouble but it was nothing that didn't blow over once Merle was distracted by hitting on the older blonde, hunting or getting wasted. He was surprised to learn that the times Natalie was able to go on her own and train with him were because the old man knew he was out hunting and covered for her.

He heard them talking about how long she would be ignored by the other people. It appeared that most of them had taken Shane's side which Daryl wasn't surprised of. It was like Natalie had said to the old guy whose name he remembered was Dale, they were more likely to follow the hero looking cop over the broken woman. It was the last part that bothered Daryl the most, something he and Dale apparently had in common. Natalie wasn't broken, at least not yet. He couldn't understand how she acts so strong and independent and yet still think people see her as broken. For someone who usually claimed not to give a shit about what other people said she was dead certain that they thought about her a certain way. Maybe that was her way to keep herself from hurting. Just assume she knew what others thought of her and distanced herself. As he was pondering this he saw Merle make his way over to her once Dale had left.

He went just rolled his eyes and continued to skin squirrels thinking Merle would be over soon to complain about Natalie being a bitch then passed out. He was surprised to hear her laughing though.

"Hey Darylina! Stop skinning those squirrels and come have a drink with us." He heard Merle shout at him. He wasn't going to go over at first but then he thought it may be kind of fun to see them banter like usual and he was also curious why she of all people was actually laughing with his brother. So he went over and took a drink from the bottle his brother held out to him.

"Man Darylina you should have seen Falco that day you hunted down that boar! She was ripping Shane apart and had the fiercest look in those eyes. She really was like a falcon hunting her prey." He babbled. Daryl wondered how many times Merle was going to bring this up because it felt like he talked about it almost every day like it was the top headline of a newspaper.

"You're exaggerating Merle. He just pissed me off because he thinks I'm a loose cannon for not being one of his puppets. So I went off on him, not my classiest moment." She had a slight smile on her face as she said it, so she must be getting over her ill-feelings towards it.

"Wish I was here to see it." Daryl said and he really meant it. He never liked Shane that well and was glad that someone questioned his authority. "That douche bag had it coming."

"Oh and how would you know? Last I checked you rarely had any interaction with him." That may be true but Daryl had seem plenty of guys like him who needed constant control. He may have called Natalie a loose cannon but in Daryl's eyes it was Shane who would be the one to cause trouble.

"Call it as I seem them. If I'm lucky I won't have to interact with him at all." Or anyone else in the camp for that matter. If Merle really did want to rob the place he didn't want to talk to anyone, it was bad enough in his mind that he interacted with Natalie but he just kept telling himself that's different because he met her before the others and she would bounce back quick once they left.

"Falco did you really put a curse on him? Because I didn't know what the hell you said." Daryl rolled his eyes at that. Merle was convinced Natalie was some voodoo witch because she said something that wasn't in English. Last time he checked she didn't have any voodoo dolls or sacrifice any animals to whatever god they believed in.

"No Merle and if you keep this up I'm going to need a drink." She says and looks at the bottle that's in his hand. He gave her an are you serious look but handed the bottle to her. He was surprised that she actually put it to her lips after knowing he and his brother both drank from it but what actually amazed him was that she took a big sip and swallowed it without making a face. That was some strong whiskey too, not only would women make a face that looked like they sucked on a lemon but some guys would to.

"What? Falcos know how to swallow." She and Merle broke out in laughter after that. Daryl though was still stunned that she liked dirty jokes, although she didn't seem that shy in the forest that one day he reminded himself. "OK bad choice of words, don't get any ideas Merle. Anyway it wasn't a curse, I got so mad I started swearing at him in Italian. Good thing too otherwise I probably would have been in more hot water than I already am." Merle was still laughing and Daryl couldn't stop a smirk from forming on his face. Every time he talked to her he was usually stunned at what came out of her mouth but his respect for her kept growing.

"Man Falco I like this side of you! Got to offer you a drink more often."

"Well at least someone likes this side of me. Most of the others seem to want to be as far away from me as possible." She said with a more serious tone in her voice. Daryl decided it was the alcohol that made him speak up tonight.

"Fuck em. If there stupid enough to side with that lunatic just because he wears a cop uniform than why would you care about what they think." She looked him with an eyebrow raised (something he was getting used to) but he also thought he saw a look of gratitude and that she agreed with him. Merle muttered something about taking a piss and going to bed. It was still pretty early in the night but he was too drunk to care.

"You keep coming to my rescue and trying to cheer me up. Any reason why Dixon?" she asked. He rolled his eyes starting to get annoyed by the fact that this was usually brought up by one of them but he was just going to shrug it off.

"Bad habit I guess." The next part came out of his mouth so fast that he couldn't stop "And you're kind of decent to have around. Not as stupid some of the others and it's kind of amusing to see you banter with Merle."

"Why Daryl, is this as close to an I like you as I'm going to get?" she teased. Her face lightened up and she had a playfulness in her eyes. _Damn! Why did I go and say that! Get it together man!_ He thought to himself. He had to cover his tracks but he also didn't want to hurt her feelings tonight. He didn't want to admit it but he preferred her to be witty and sarcastic over whatever it was she was feeling for the past couple of days. She looked much more alive this way; he also noticed that she called him Daryl. She rarely called him by his first name and he and his brother did the same to her. It was her way of saying I like talking to you but don't expect this to mean anything.

"Don't go making a big deal outta it. You're gonna make me regret it." He said quickly to throw her off but he realized he didn't mean it. She was still smiling at him as he said that. _Crap! She can't be getting close to me! _He thought._ She knows better than that!_ But he also couldn't help but realize that he was getting used to having her around and she wasn't as much of a nuisance as she used to be. What was that saying? A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts. Well if that was the case than Daryl was screwed. Whatever walls he was trying to form to keep himself away from Natalie weren't working like he hoped. There was something between them, and no matter how small it was he wanted it to go away.

He was interrupted from his thoughts by static coming from the radio. Someone was trying to call for help and they went over to it. Natalie grabbed the speaker and talked into it.

"Hello, is anyone there?" She asked hesitantly. They both looked at each other not sure what to think of this. Should they get the others or wait and see if someone is there.

"Please help… (_static_)… in Atlanta… there are others…(_static_)… I need to find her." A female voice spoke. Natalie's eyes looked like they were going to pop out of her head and Daryl was sure he had a similar look on his face. They thought Atlanta was destroyed so how could there still be people. That's what Daryl was thinking anyway, Natalie seemed to have something else on her mind as she spoke into the radio.

"…Reese?"

* * *

**Dun! Dun! Dun! What's going to happen next? Hope you enjoy this and sorry if the third person part of the story was a little repetitive. I just thought it be fun to put in Daryl's side of things from time to time but I use third person for him because I find it easier to write my main character in first person because I created her and know her personality and since Daryl isn't mine he's a littler harder to write from his point of view without making him OOC. Next time I'll try to make sure that when I write from his point of view it's not as repetitive.**

**Guest: Glad you like chapters that establish relationships and the twist with Jim in chapter 5. I thought it be fun to introduce some characters in different ways other than them being in the camp from the start or just wandering around and finding it, plus him being a mechanic gave me the idea of him being the one to get her car back. Chapter 6 was my favorite to because it was fun and easier to write than most chapters, I was also happy with the black widow moment because I really wanted it in there but I also wanted it to be kind of awkward, funny and have her tease him a little bit. As for Jacqui I was just trying to be creative and try to use more of the characters that are underrated. Your also right about her shooting the snake being weird. I'm trying to do as much research on certain stuff as I can but I'm really not a firearms expert and I wanted a some type of drama and reason for Jim to find them. As you can see in this chapter there is definitely going to be a strained relationship between Natalie and Shane and some disagreements with Lori and Andrea. I never really hated Andrea either, I just didn't always agree with some of her decisions(i did hate her for shooting Daryl but who didn't lol). She wasn't the worst character though. That role does go to Lori. I tried not to hate her and remind myself that you are bound to make some bad decisions during situations like that but she just made it hard to like her because of all the things you said. I especially didn't like how she handled the Rick/Shane love triangle, the pregnancy, and how she wouldn't enforce any parental authority over Carl. She lets the kid run wild and then acts all surprised when he gets into trouble or starts mouthing off to her *rolls eyes*. Any way I am not going to make her a saint and Natalie will have disagreements with her and Andrea but she also won't try to make them her enemies. Natalie is supposed to be a character that tries not to make more drama than there already is (although her temper does get the better of her at times).  
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**Thank you all for reading and feel free to leave a comment. If you haven't followed the story and want to keep up with it I would recommend that because I don't have set dates for when I update this. **


	8. Somewhat Calm Before the Storm

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Walking Dead. Just my OC Natalie.**

**Warning: Some sensitive subjects will be brought up. I'd warn about the cursing but if you're already this far in than you'd know I'm not afraid to put in some offensive swears now and then.**

* * *

Chapter 8

I was just talking to Daryl when we heard the radio go off. It started off with static alerting us that someone was trying to communicate. I walked over to the radio hesitantly like for some reason it was going to attack me. I had an uneasy feeling in my stomach as I picked it up and talked into it.

"Hello, is anyone there?" I asked suspiciously. Maybe it just went off sometimes and no one was there or maybe someone was there. I looked at Daryl to see that he had the same unsure look on my face. I wonder if one of us should go get someone. Then I heard her talk.

"Please help… (static)… in Atlanta… there are others… (static)… I need to find her." She said. My heart stopped for a minute as I heard the voice, her voice. It wasn't very clear but I'd know that voice anywhere, I've heard that tone of sadness and desperation many times in the past. It had to be my sister.

"…Reese?" my shaky voice asked. Was I finally going to find her? What was she doing in Atlanta?

"Hello? Who's there?" said a voice that was definitely not my sister's. It sounded like a guy's voice.

"Who was talking before? Is she with you now?" I asked with panic in my voice. I couldn't lose her now! She was just there, it had to be her! There were others now approaching to see what was going on but I was focused on who was the other line.

"There's no girl here. She must be on another radio. Are you in Atlanta too?" he asked and my heart dropped at hearing she wasn't there. It was like I was so close to her and she was ripped out of my arms. I heard Shane interrupt.

"What's going on? Who's on the radio?" I ignored him as I continued to talk to whoever was on the other end.

"No we're outside the city. Set up camp away from everything. How many of you are there and how did you survive so long?"

"There's probably about six or seven of us. (Static) When the bombs came down we were either out of range or just kept moving looking for whatever safe zone we could. (Static) I've looted places and avoiding those things every day. We're in the downtown area." He spoke back but he was breaking up. The next thing I knew Shane snatched the receiver out of my hand and started shouting in it.

"How many of those things are out there? What happened to the military, law enforcement and the refugee center?" He asked but there was no response. Just dead air.

"Shit!" he said and threw it down. There was talk among the others about what was heard.

"Shane what do we do?" Lori asked him.

"Nothing. It's too dangerous; the guy said he's been avoiding geeks every day so it's too risky to go down there. They're surviving on their own so they can get out on their own."

"Are you insane?" I shouted at him. "There are people down there who need help! We didn't know anyone was alive or if Atlanta was still standing and now we know it is!"

"We don't need to go losing any people! We got to protect the group!" he shouted at me.

"But Shane we did set up the radio for more than just us. It was if someone needed help." Dale spoke up.

"What about your duty officer? Aren't you supposed to serve man and help them? I don't care what you say I'm going because there's a chance my sister is down there!" I shouted. I don't care if everyone thought I was a nutcase, I was going there no matter what they said.

"If she's going I'm going." T-dog spoke up. "She shouldn't go by herself and the lord kept those people alive for a reason and I got the van that's big enough for everyone."

"I'm going too." Andrea spoke up. Amy looked at her but she wasn't paying attention "I can't just sit here and do nothing knowing that there are people who need help."

The next thing I know I hear more people agreeing that we couldn't just do nothing knowing they were out there. I was shocked that they were agreeing with me after a couple of days ago and by look on Shane's face he was surprised to.

"Look!" he shouted. "It's too late in the night to do anything now, if we really are going to do this than we are doing it in the morning. Whoever volunteered can sleep on it and decide if they still want to go and other people can think about if they want to go. Now everyone go back to your tents and get a good night's rest." With that people started to disperse and I saw Dale come over to me.

"See, I told you to just wait until something else came up. Now I know it's noble of you to want to help them and you also have a reason to go but are you sure you can do it?" He asked me. I nod my head.

"Yeah, I meant everything I said. If I back out now what message would that send? Besides before that guy came on there was a girl and I swear she sounded like my sister. If she is there than I need to go, I've been waiting for a plan to come to me and this is the only lead I have." I said.

"Okay, I understand. But I don't want you to get your hopes up to high. Sometimes we hear what we want to hear. I'm not denying you heard a woman's voice but it may not have been her. Just remember to keep your head clear." He said as he went back to his RV. I turned my head to where Daryl was standing to see that he wasn't there anymore. He must have gone back to his tent without telling me. I was kind of disappointed because I wanted to ask if he was coming tomorrow and talk about how satisfying it was to one up Shane. But I decided that it was probably best to check my gear and pack a backpack for tomorrow. We had no idea what we would be getting into and even though I've improved my skills I wasn't ready to take a whole herd down without help, especially since I'm still a little slow when it comes to reloading arrows.

* * *

Third person Daryl's (POV)

He walked away from her when Dale went up to talk to her, going to his tent where Merle probably woke up from the loud uproar that just took place. He didn't know what to think of what had just happened. He was glad that Shane got thrown off his high horse for once but he also thought it was a death sentence to go to the city. Natalie may have improved since the first night she faced geeks but that didn't stop him from picturing her getting ambushed and ripped apart. It sickened him to think about it but she was crazy to say that she was willing to go alone. He would rather knock her out and keep her tied up before he'd let that happen. But then people started to agree and volunteer to go with her and he knows that no matter what he said he couldn't stop her now. In that moment she had the look of a warrior in her eyes and she wasn't going to back down. That's why he had to walk away from her, because he knew that he would just lose it and fight with her about how crazy she was being. It would have just made things worse because they wouldn't back down from their arguments and she is doing it to look for her sister. He would be a hypocrite if he tried to hold her back because if this were the same situation with him and Merle he would do the same thing. When he got in the tent he saw that Merle was awake and he looked mad about it.

"What the hell is going on out there? For a sec I thought I was back in prison and a riot broke out." He said. Daryl sat on top of his sleep bag on the other side of the tent playing with his knife.

"Someone was on the radio. Said they're in Atlanta. Shane said we weren't going to do anything but Natalie nearly ripped his head off and some people are going out there tomorrow."

"I thought that was Falco? Since when did you start calling her by her first name?" he asked and Daryl stopped sliding the knife between his fingers. _Fucking Christ! _He thought. He had just done the same thing that Natalie had done to him not that long ago. Didn't even realize it until Merle pointed it out. Luckily for Daryl though Merle was still a little drunk and kept talking.

"Ya know what, don't matter. So they're heading to Atlanta tomorrow, well this changes things. You gonna go?" he asked and Daryl was glad to change the topic.

"…No. Have no reason to go; I'm better off here hunting. They wanna run around downtown looking for a few people in a city of the dead than that's their problem, and what do you mean this changes things."

"Well I was thinking we wake up early, rob the place and leave before they woke up but if they are going into the city I might as well tag along and see if I can find any goodies." He said. Daryl wasn't that surprised to just be hearing about this now. Merle rarely planned ahead of time or let Daryl know about it and Daryl was now glad that the radio call came through. For some reason he didn't want to leave yet and he didn't want to think about why that might be.

"Don't know how much you'll find, they'll probably want everyone to stay together and I doubt they'd let you go looking for blow."

"I'll find a way little D, always do. Wait… if Falco's going how come you aren't? Thought you got off at the chance to save her."

"Fucks sake Merle! Nothing like that and you know it. She's stubborn as an ass and is hell-bent that she'll find her sis out there. Now that she's got some training in and there's going to be a group going I don't need to be the one who saves her ass all the time." He said leaving out that he wants to distance himself from her so that he doesn't feel as guilty when they rob the camp. But there was no need to let Merle know that unless he wanted to be teased relentlessly.

"Yeah well if there was ever an ass worth saving it'd be hers."

"You'd say that about a lot of asses Merle. You seem to like that blonde a lot too."

"Not going to lie little bro I'll take what I can get. But you gotta admit Falco isn't bad to look at, gotta be a reason why you put up with her if you don't want anything out of her. Just don't get too close; people like her are bombs waiting to go off."

"What do you mean people like her?"

"She's damaged. She basically admitted to being homeless most of her life and the way she blows up at the cop, while funny, shows she's at her breaking point."

"She's not damaged. She takes care of herself and still manages to be positive in this hell we got." Daryl defended her. "Besides, we had a sucky past too so why you judging her."

"Cus although we went through hell at least we had each other and always had a place to live. Her sis didn't take care of her it sounds like, more like the other way around. Besides remember that one house in our town where all the kids with no mammas or daddies went to?"

"Yeah, the Isaac house right?" Daryl remembered a big white house that had a lot of paint chips on it. There were always kids and some teens around it that had shitty clothing and always looked miserable. But there were also times where he wanted to go there to get away from his dad. Just hide in a herd of them and hope his dad didn't spot him, then run away to the woods to live wild.

"Yep you were too young to remember and dad never wanted you to know so you wouldn't get any ideas but there was an incident there once. Old man Isaac was stabbed by one of the girls. She was arrested and never seen again but that led to the secrets coming out. They weren't being fed, they were beaten black an blue, and that girl who stabbed him… he was raping her." Merle said the last one waiting for Daryl to explode. He wanted to but he was controlling. What sickened him most was that last time he checked the Isaacs were still taking in kids since they left that town. After all that the town just swept that under the rug and did nothing to stop them, probably because the Isaacs had a legacy and the town took their word over any abandon kid. Most of the kids were suspected to be crazy or have issues. But Daryl still didn't let that get to him, instead he wanted to know why this was being brought up.

"What does this have to do with Nat… Falco?" he said catching himself before he said her name.

"Because the Isaacs' aren't the only ones that do that. In my days in the army and in prison I've met people who lived like those kids did. They were just left to fend for themselves when they were eighteen and a lot of them were still scarred and angry bout what happened. How much you wanna bet that out of all the place's that girl's been to not one of them did something like that to her?" he said. Daryl wanted to answer but he couldn't, because he had a feeling it was true. It would explain the discomfort about being helped and how she acted cautious around Ed and even him and Merle sometimes.

"Your silence says it all. I'm going to bed." And like that Merle passed out and started to lightly snore.

Daryl just sat there thinking about what Merle had said. He remembered the blank stares on the kids' faces when he passed by that house and didn't want to think that Natalie was one of them. She was so stubborn, blunt, witty and independent. But then he remembered the look in her eyes when she saw Atlanta burn and how she acted the morning they went hunting, lifeless and lonely. She did look like those kids then and he also realizes that if this is true than that was why he saw himself in her. They both had their demons, his was his father and hers was whoever had hurt her the most in her past. But he also saw some major differences between her and what Merle said. She did have her sister waiting for her, got an education and was still going strong and had a light in her brown eyes. She was strong and showed that not everyone that comes from a life like that is automatically broken. These were some of the last thoughts that Daryl had before he went to bed along with how she was going to be alright.

* * *

Natalie's POV

It was morning now and all of us that volunteered to go are lined up and listening to the instructions Shane was giving us. I should have known that even though it was my idea Shane would somehow take control and act he's the one leading the whole thing, not that I mind not having to take control it was just him acting like a martyr and some of the people treating him like one was pissing me off. He wasn't even going, most likely he and Lori we're going to go in the woods and "look for fire wood". There are a few people who look my way trying to see how I'm handling this but I'm keeping a straight face for once. My only focus was getting there and finding the people who called out to us, hoping that the girl was Reese and the guy could help me find her.

I'm leaning against T-dogs van waiting for everyone to say their goodbyes. T-dog and Jacqui were talking, I actually got an apology from her about ratting out the Jim situation and avoiding me but I told her not to worry about it. Morales decided to come so he was saying goodbye to his kids, Andrea and Amy were talking with Dale close by and Merle (who I was surprised to hear wanted in) went off somewhere. I had already said goodbye to Amy, Dale and the kids. I told Carol and Sophia to take care of themselves which pissed off Ed but made them feel good. I was just leaning against the van looking at everyone when I felt someone else lean against it, I look over to see it was Daryl who I could have sworn was avoiding me today.

"Still not going with us Dixon?" I asked him.

"Nope, you still going no matter what people say?" he countered.

"Yep." We just stood there for a little while in silence watching everyone before he talked again.

"I know you think she's there, I was there when you heard her but you do know that it's a slim chance you'll find her. You don't even know if she's in that part of the city."

"You're right. I don't but I have to try. Wouldn't you do the same if it was your brother out there?" he paused for minute before answering.

"He's kind of been a pain in the ass lately." I laugh

"Lately?" I ask sarcastically and he smirks and rolls his eyes. One of the few things he actually shows any hint of joy over is making fun of other people.

"Alright, all the time but I would do what I could to get him out of trouble. It's why I'm not stopping you from going."

"Yet you aren't coming with me. That's different than usual." He usually felt like he had to watch over me no mattered how annoyed it made me.

"You got him in your group." He pointed towards Merle who was emerging from the woods zipping up his fly. "Plus you've gotten a little better when it comes to defending yourself. With me for a teacher how could you not." He said the last part with a gleam in his eye. It was really starting to feel like we were becoming friends or as close to friends as you could be with a Dixon. I didn't know if that scared me or happy. Most likely a mixture of both because I rarely felt comfortable making friends (Amy and some of the past ones I had were the only exceptions). Merle had just reached us.

"Well if it ain't to of my favorite people! Don't worry lil' bro I'll watch her back while we're out there." He said.

"Merle you do know that back and backside are two different things right?" I ask which gets a laugh out of him and I see Daryl try to hide his faint smile and little snort.

"Oh Falco you always get a good laugh out of me. How do you come up with this stuff so fast?" He asked. The others just got done saying their goodbyes and were loading themselves into the van.

"Years of practice Merle, years of practice" I say as he opens the door and hops in. I'm just about to in when I turn back to Daryl.

"Well, see you later I guess." I say awkwardly. I'm not that great with goodbyes, especially ones where there's the chance you'll never see that person again.

"What do you mean you guess? I will see you later." He says. I smile get in the van and we drive off towards Atlanta.

* * *

**That's it for now because I wanted to build up to the events in Atlanta and have all that in at least one or two chapters otherwise it would be way to long. I'm sure that some of you are probably a little disappointed that Daryl isn't going but I don't want Natalie to be a character that constantly has to be by his side. I want to expand her character outside of him and have her interact with others, plus to me it just feels right that because they are getting closer Daryl would want to try to put some distance between them because 1) if he and Merle did rob the camp I doubt he would befriend Natalie only to hurt her, he's not that big of a jerk. 2) he is still not that great with opening up to people and he doesn't until seasons 2 and 3. Plus it gives me a chance to work with the other characters. **

**Also I know there were sensitive topics brought up and I'm not trying to offend anyone with what I had Merle say. It just felt right to have Merle think those things because he has all these biased opinions about sensitive topics (my only mistake was probably making him think too hard about them lol). It also leaves some hints about stuff that may or may not have happened to Natalie that made her the person she is. **

**So the next chapter will have action, a flashback and meeting up with one of the mysterious voices! Who is it? Will Reese be there? Stay tuned to find out! As always feel free to favorite, follow and/or leave a review. **


	9. City of the Dead

**Oh man this one was more stressful to write. I kept typing walker when I meant to put geek, can't say that yet because Rick's the one to bring the term walker to the group. I kind of can't wait until I started writing from where the show takes off but then I also have to go find all the words for the shows (or just marathon it and write it down word for word. The re watching I'd enjoy but the writing everything down would be a pain in the ass.) If any of you guys know where the best place to find the episodes written down by lines let me know whether it's by PM or review (I'll try to find what I can but suggestions are always appreciated). After this Atlanta trip I'd probably want to do some time skips and do a minimum of five chapters before getting to season one. As always thanks for reading.**

**Warning: Violence, swearing and suggestive dialog.**

**Dislaimer: Still don't own Walking Dead.**

* * *

Chapter 9

It's a long and aggravating ride to Atlanta. Mostly because Merle was running his big mouth as usual and always managed to say something that offended all of us. The one who was affected most by this was T-dog because Merle was one of the biggest racists I've ever met and T-dog wasn't afraid to speak up for himself. We would try to various ways to calm them down but the best solution was sending Merle to the back, but that meant that I had to be somewhat close to the back in order to make sure he behaves. We had to take a long way in order to avoid any possible threats so we were now having a rare moment where everyone was silent. As I'm staring out the window, thinking of tactics to use in case of being attacked in Atlanta Andrea comes up and sits in front of me.

"Hey Natalie" She says breaking me out of my trance.

"Hey" I saw back. We haven't said much to each other since the Shane outburst and I'm wondering why she came back here. I didn't have anything against Andrea personally; it just became awkward when we started to have different views.

"I just came back here to see if we were good after what happened. I know we didn't end things that great but I want you to know that I do think you have some good points. I'm getting restless just doing laundry and chores with the other women. I still stand by with what I said earlier but when you spoke up about this I had to join because I saw how desperately you want to find your sister and I know that I would fight to the death for Amy." She said. I saw the sincerity in her eyes. Sure, she didn't apologize at all to me but I saw she sympathized with me about Reese and seeing how she's so protective of Amy reinforces what she's saying right now.

"Yeah, we're good. We're just doing what we think is best for our loved ones." I say.

"Yeah, we are."

"Are you girls going to kiss and make up? Because I would very much like to see that!" Merle shouted from where he was sitting.

"Shut up Merle!" We both yelled from where we were sitting. We looked at each other and laughed. I don't care if we get in another argument in a few days or even in a few hours. Right now there was a moment of peace and you have to savor these moments before the chaos takes it away.

"This is as far as we're going." T-dog yelled from the driver's seat. "We walk on foot from here."

* * *

One by one we got off the bus and I take a look at the city I was just getting used to calling home. It was eerily quiet. The sound of cars, sirens and people talking in the street were no longer present. I got a chill as we walked in and saw the abandoned cars on the street and sidewalks empty. It feels so unnatural for it to be this deserted. I have my bow at my side and an arrow at the ready from the bundle that I'm holding in my backpack. We make our way down the street all on guard; it's still quiet as we make our way to the end of the street.

"Man it's like a ghost town here." Merle said breaking the tension. "Which way are we going?"

"Well" I said "The guy on the radio said he and the others relocated somewhere downtown, from what I can remember if we take that way" I say pointing to the right "we should get there in about four to five blocks. Normally I'd recommend some alley ways but I never got around to using them while I lived here so we'd probably just end up getting lost. Once we get there we can search the buildings for any signs or people or even grab some stuff that could be useful while we are here or back at camp." They all were looking at me intently. "What? Something wrong?" I asked not sure why they were looking at me. Morales was the one to speak up.

"Nothing. You just sounded like a leader for a minute. Not used to it."

"Yeah, you're not half bad at it Natalie." T-dog spoke up. "I just wanna recommend some roads I'd use when I'd pick people up to take to church."

"By all means go ahead. I'm obviously new at this and don't mind some suggestions." I say. Morales and T-dog take the lead, Andrea close by and I'm walking behind her when I hear Merle whisper something to me.

"Way to pussy out Falco." I turn my head with a confused look.

"Excuse me?"

"You just showed your weakness. You were in charge and even though I don't like it when someone other than me is in charge you had them under your control. But then you said that and now they're gonna doubt your judgement." He said.

"Dixon, I'm not Shane. I don't try to control people and act like I have it all together. I want them to speak up and work together as a team. I'm not a leader or a soldier; I'm just a girl trying to find the only family she's got left."

"I know that but they don't see it that way. From what Daryl said you're the one who rallied this so they are looking to you to lead this. You gave the illusion that you're more capable than you really are. I know your just a loud mouth snarky little runt who's just waiting to crack but no one else does."

"Then why are you helping me if I'm just a little runt?" I ask. For once he's not hitting on me and I get his actually opinion on me.

"Guess Dixons just have a habit of helping you. Don't let anyone find out, unless you think it'll get me on the good side of sweet tits." He says referring to Andrea.

"Oh Merle, did you really get over me that fast?" I asked feigning overdramatic sadness.

"You ever wanna put out then let me know, otherwise I'm taking whatever opportunity I can get with any pretty thing." He smirks back. God, why did he have to be an asshole in the van then offer some twisted advice for me. Why can't some people just be pure bad or pure good, it would make things so much easier sometimes.

"Heads up!" T-dog yell as we turn a corner and there's a group of three geeks. I pull my bow out, aim at one of the heads and shoot. It goes right between the eyes and keels over. I reload and I'm about to shoot at another when I see the muzzle of a rifle next to my head.

"Hey!" I try to shout in a somewhat whisper. I turn to see Merle about to shoot one of them from right behind me. "You wanna give away our position and make me go deaf?"

"Why do you get to have all the fun darling? Just because you have to only quiet weapon doesn't mean I'm going to sit back and watch."

"I'm just trying to take out those three then we can look in the other buildings that may or may not have more in them. That's when you can have your fun." I say. That's when one of the worse things that could go wrong happen, the other two let off loud snarls and then more of them came out from around corners and out of some shops.

"Dammit!" I say as they start coming towards us. "Ok take cover behind the cars and shoot them from there. If you can, get into some of the buildings to look for others. Stick to the alley ways behind or between them if you keep moving!" I say and we disperse. Morales and Andrea behind one car, me and T-dog by another and Merle was just having a ball guns blazing and stabbing any of the ones that came close to him. God he was nuts. If he gets himself killed Daryl's going to have my ass for this.

"Got anything other than that bow?" I heard T-dog yell.

"Yeah! Got a knife, throwing knives or a gun for when I need to save arrows." I say while shooting at geeks coming towards us. That may have to come soon because at the rate I was going I would be running out soon, I'm still not that great at archery and sometimes I need to shoot two or three arrows at just one target. "There's not too many on the side-walk. I think we can make it into one of the first shops or apartments that are open and get to the alley!"

"So you want me to cover you while take you out whatever's closet to you?" He asked when he saw I put the bow away and drew my knife.

"Yep. We go on three!" He nods and I see a geek about to come up behind him but I lunge and stab it in the head. "THREE! Let's go!" I shout and we start sprinting.

He's still shooting at some across the street that are coming towards us and I'm kicking at the knees of the ones in front of me and stabbing or kicking their skulls in when it's necessary. Just as I'm about to stab another one a bullet goes through its head and I see Morales shot it from where he was across the street. I nod my head in thanks and we both go off to wherever we can find safety. All around me I hear the sound of gunshots, bodies falling to the ground and so many cries from the bodies of geeks whose vocal cords won't work properly. Me and T-dog run through an open apartment building to see that there are some geeks in the kitchen (sadly it was a family). One of them dives for me so I duck as T-dog shoots it and we go up the stairs looking for a fire escape to the back. As we reach the top and head for the open bedroom door with the fire escape on it one of the other doors opens and a geek lunges at me. I kick it in the chest sending it backwards and stab it before it hits the ground.

"Who are you? Xena Warrior Princess?" I hear T-dog shout at me.

"Keep moving!" I shout back and we make our way toward the fire escape.

* * *

"Okay I think we're safe for now." T-dog said as we found shelter in an abandoned building. We had just got done running through alley ways where there were only a few geeks but it still wasn't safe being out in the open. We were both trying to catch our breath. Man that was the longest I had run in a long time, my lungs felt like they shriveled up and died.

"Can't be too sure. Let's look around, see what this place is and if there is anything or anyone it." I say. He agrees and takes the back room while I take the front. As I walk down the hallway I see there are old pictures on the wall along with some news articles. I think it's some type of restaurant. My suspicions are confirmed when I see a door labeled as a unisex bathroom and I get to the front which has booths set up along the windows, a counter with register and protective glass they put the food behind so you can pick what you want and a pizza oven. I realize that this is a pizza place, and of course it had to be the one that Reese and I loved the most in the city.

* * *

_I just got into the city and Reese took me to his small pizza joint that was a couple blocks away from our apartment. She was placing the order and told me to go sit since I was probably tired from my long journey here. I was but I was also feeling frustrated. I had gone through a rough week. My internship expired and the position that I worked so hard to earn got passed on to some other candidate and I had just had a rough breakup with my boyfriend Eli. Even though my good friend and former foster-sister Maya offered to help me through it I couldn't accept it. I needed to get away from New York even though I loved it and considered it my home. Plus Maya had to care for her four-year old daughter Sara and keep the pawn shop her and her boyfriend owned from going under. My other friend and former college roommate Allie was in Japan teaching English to students, I was actually thinking of going with her but I didn't want to risk it if I actually got the job, Eli and I were getting serious at the time and Reese would occasionally need me if she went off her meds too long. Speak of the devil she had just sat herself in the booth in front of me smiling real big._

"_Should be done and brought over here in a couple of minutes." She said but her face got serious when she caught me deep in thought. _

"_Hey, what's wrong?" _

"_Nothing what makes you say that?"_

"_Because I'm your sister, I'm supposed to have this radar that alerts me to when your upset and you never look this upset when you're about to eat pizza. We're Italian, pizza is the solution to everything!" she said the last part a little loud and we got some stares._

"_Way to just reinforce the Italian stereotype to the whole pizza shop Reese, besides last time I checked we were only half-Italian."_

"_Yeah but mom was half Irish and French so we're mostly Italian. Nonni and grandpa made sure that we remembered that. Besides you're changing the subject like you usually do when you're upset. Is it about Eli?" She asked me. I let out a sigh and rub the knot that's been in my neck since my plane took off. _

"_Yeah in a way. It's just a little of everything. I let myself believe that everything was going to work out when I should have known better. But instead I turned off the part of that doubts everything and just tried to be happy and trusting like you want me to. I thought that by now I would be working for a great magazine, keep my apartment and was having one of the best relationships I had since I was sixteen."_

"_Oh yeah I remember Aiden. The hot sensitive guy with the guitar. You still would have been cute together if he hadn't decided to go on tour with an unknown band and you two didn't want a long distance thing." Reese said remembering my punk phase and my first real boyfriend._

"_Hey let's get back to the topic otherwise I'm not going to want to finish." I said which snaps her out of her daydream. She always lets her mind wander. _

"_Anyway instead of listening to my gut and preparing myself for the worst I didn't get the job, I'm having trouble finding work other than freelance stuff, couldn't keep up with my rent alone and I saw a side to Eli that I can't believe I missed."_

"_Guess my advice kind backfired didn't it. I'm sorry about the job and apartment but what I still don't understand is what happened with your love life. I didn't necessarily think Eli was the greatest guy for you but I thought he was ok. Sure he was kind of stuck up because he was a so-called creative genius and went to Europe a couple times but he seemed stable enough and you to usually seemed happy together." _

"_Yeah I thought those things to. It was good for a while, we had our ups and downs, really good nights (ugh still awkward to talk about intimacy), fought like animals, and enjoyed being around each other but there was always a part of me that thought something wasn't right or something was missing. Then he showed his true colors about five months into dating each other." _

"_You never got into those details with me. Just that he changed and it wasn't something you wanted to deal with."_

"_He did. He got more clingy, kept trying to find ways to get me to not hang out with my friends, wanted me to stop talking to my guy friends all together, and somehow he found out everything about me." I said the last part and Reese's eyes went into shock at the last part._

"_He dug up information about you behind your back?" she asked, we both knew what that was like. Anytime someone learned about what we had been through, family deaths, foster care for me, dropping out of college and having mental breakdowns for Reese they would usually run for the hills or act really weird around us._

"_Yeah but what scared me was after that he got really controlling once he found out. He flipped out and accused me of hiding things from him when he told me mostly everything about him. Said that I didn't take our relationship seriously when it was actually the most serious I've ever had and was getting around to telling him about that stuff. That's when he tried to limit who I hung out with and he freaked out about my tattoo." _

"_Oh I haven't seen it yet! Is it all filled in?" she asked excitedly as she plopped herself next to me in the booth and moved my shirt a bit at the neckline to get a look. I couldn't help but roll my eyes at the scene she was probably making but Reese had a passion for tattoos. _

"_Oh man it looks almost real!" she said while stroking what I think is a feather. "Good thing your friend that did this was a professional. Remember the one I had on my hip?"_

"_The one that looked more like a badly drawn star than a lily? Yeah you were so pissed and saved up so you could go to a better place and get it redone."_

"_Never get a tattoo you thought of in the heat of the moment and drunk with some hot guy you found in a mosh pit." I rolled my eyes at that. Even though Reese was in her early thirties now she still acted like she was in her twenties. No ideas of marriage or babies for her. "But yeah this is beautiful. Papa would be proud of this. He had a falcon tattooed on his bicep." She said and I felt her go tense as she landed on a certain part of my back. It was a faint jagged circle that was mostly hidden in the wing, the same pattern that was on my chest._

"_Hey. Reese it's ok. Don't think about it." I tell her reaching out to grab her hand off my back. She squeezed it needing comfort._

"_I can't forget it. Not like you did. I wish I could but I should have done more to help you, maybe things would be different if I did." She said getting a distant look in her eyes. I know that what happened to me is why she is the way she is today; she saw everything and never recovered. I needed to get her out of that memory before she does anything to hurt herself._

"_It's not your fault and that's not what we're talking about today. We're talking about what a douche bag Eli turned out to be." She snapped out of it and got back on topic._

"_Oh I've had my share of douche bags, I'm sure Eli wasn't as bad as all of them put together. So he got insecure about your guy friends, a lot of guys do."_

"_It wasn't just the guys. It was also Allie who he thought was too much with all her talk of traveling to Japan and wanting me to come with, Maya because she was a reminder of my time in the foster system, he wanted me to practically be only with him or his friends. But the breaking point, the one where we had this intense screaming match and where I punched him… was when he told me to cut you lose." I say, I kept debating all day whether I should leave that part out but it just felt right to tell her. She had a look of pure rage in her eyes._

"_Quel piccolo stronzo!"* she cursed in Italian which only got one man behind the counter to look this way. "How dare he try to force you to do that!" _

"_Reese calm down. I would never do that and you know that." _

"_You almost did." I look at her in shock for what she said. I hate to say it was true, I hate remembering that day. Telling her I couldn't do this anymore or stand by and watch. If she wanted to keep me in her life she need to get her shit together because I couldn't let her bring me down with her. _

"_I only did that because I was desperate. You know now that I didn't mean it."_

"_I don't blame you. It was the wake-up call I needed. After that I knew I needed to clean up my act as best I could. Which is why I'm tempted to fly to New York and take care of that douche bag myself for trying to take you away from me."_

"_Don't worry; he's not going to be the same. No more pompous assholes like him, I think I'm going to take a break from relationships all together."_

"_Please! You are so afraid of commitment I'm surprised you were in a relationship for so long. What you need is either a nice dorky guy you can control or you just need to get a one night stand under your belt,"_

"_Oh my god Reese! I don't think getting laid is the only solution. What type of sister says something like that?"_

"_What? I'm not a motherly figure nor would I ever want to be. And I know you don't do one night stands but you also hate letting yourself open up to guys. I think you might actually like it once in a while if you just loosened up." She said and I'm still in shock when our pizza is delivered to us. We both look up to see a kind of cute guy who looks really shy._

"_Thank you." I say with a smile on my face. He looks at me and gives me a sweet shy smile before one of the guys yells from the kitchen._

"_Hey Speedy! We got an order on the other side of the city! You're the only one who can get there in time before it becomes free!" With that he rushes over to grab the pizzas on the counter and storms out of the place._

"_Wow." Reese says. "Did you see the look he gave you? Those cute puppy dog eyes didn't want to leave you."_

"_Relax Reese. You say that about any guy I make eye contact with." I say before I take a bite out of my margarita pizza and she eats her cheese less pizza with veggies (she was a vegan). _

"_That may be true but you underestimate how cute you are. Besides I've been here and ordered out from here a couple of times and he never looked at me like that. I think he's afraid of me."_

"_Well no offense but you're not exactly subtle. Sometimes you look like your about to molest them right there on the floor. Also do you still answer the door in your underwear sometimes?"_

"_Hey it's not underwear, just a cropped t-shirt and some short shorts and that only happened once. Also don't make fun of my sexual appetite. If a guy can play the field than a girl should have the same opportunities."_

"_Hey I'm not judging. I wasn't complaining that one time you wore that and got us a discount on pizza."_

"_See? You're welcome. Oh and don't think I'm giving up on you and pizza boy. Think he's speedy at everything?" She asks with a perverted look on her face. _

"_Reese… I really like this pizza. Please don't ruin anything."_

* * *

It feels like that happened a lifetime ago, when really it was probably four months or so. We were such different people back then worrying about little things. I also can't believe it's been so long since I thought about my friends in New York or Eli. Well I wanted a clean break from Eli but I had promised to email Maya and Allie anytime I could, something I wish I had done more of before all this happened. It had been about a month and a half since I heard from either of them and now I have no idea if they lived through all this. If so I wonder how they are handling this. I would like to think they weren't stuck in a pizza shop in a town full of dead people looking for their loved ones like I was.

"T-dog? All clear up here what about you?" I ask walking back to see where he had gone. I found him in the storage closet. He was rummaging through some boxes looking supplies I guess.

"Find anything?

"Nothing that hasn't already gone bad. Shame to come into a pizza joint and have nothing here to eat."

"Don't remind me. I'm trying to stop my mouth from watering looking at the pizza oven and trying to remember what it smells like." I say. Man that was one of the many downfalls of this whole situation.

At that moment we heard the bell by the front door go off. We both stiffen at the sound and I press myself against the wall. T-dog has his gun at the ready while I set up an arrow in my bow. We don't want to draw attention and I can at least reclaim this arrow if I have to use it. I inch my way towards the door and slightly look out. I don't see anyone in my line of vision but I can hear someone making some shuffling noises behind the counter. If we act now we could get the upper hand and corner whatever is out there. I motion for T-dog to follow me and we quietly make our way towards the front. When we got there it wasn't a geek, it was someone rummaging in a cabinet that I didn't notice. I turn my head to see T-dog lowering his gun and I shook my head no at him. Like Merle had said I can't show weakness and we have no idea if this guy is friendly or if he was crazy like Jim was when we first found him or worse.

"Drop any weapons and get up. Have your hands in the air." I said to the figure. He fell backwards and jumped up with his hands above his head so fast it was like he got shot at.

"Woah! I'm not armed! Take anything you want, I won't fight!" He says quickly. He's just a young guy, of Asian descent (Korean I believe) wearing a baseball cap. He looks familiar to me but it's his voice that is most distinguishable.

"Wait… did you happen to send out an S.O.S last night?" I ask lowering my bow a bit.

"Yeah wait! You're the girl on the other end weren't you? You actually came to help?" He asked.

"Yeah I did. I'm looking for someone I lost who might be here and we couldn't just do nothing knowing there were people down here who needed help. I'm Natalie and this is T-Dog." I said, he was starting to look less scared but still looked a little uncomfortable.

"I'm Glenn." He said

"What were you doing here anyway? Last time I checked pizza wasn't a big priority here." T-dog said. Normally I would say something like how dare you but now didn't seem like the time.

"The owner who was my old boss bailed when the outbreak started, then people started looting the place. Once it was completely abandoned I started using these cabinets to store some stuff I found around the city."

"Wait you worked here? That's why you look so familiar!" I said with realization, how could I have forgotten? "Me and my sister would come here or order out from this place practically every week. You always delivered to us!" He looked confused at first but then a look of recognition dawned on his face.

"Oh yeah! There was always two personal pizzas, one veggie special with no cheese and one that always kept changing. Wow I haven't run into anyone familiar in a long time, how are you guys doing." He asked. I think I saw T-dog giving the motion to Glenn not to say anything but it didn't work, it was ok though because Glenn didn't know.

"She's actually who I'm searching for. The night everything went to shit we got separated and that night you contacted us I got a message from someone who sounded like her before you came in."

"Oh, oh god I'm sorry. I'm such an idiot." He said looking really guilty.

"Don't be, you didn't know. Now last night you said there were some others, can you take us to them?" I ask. "T-dog brought a big van that should be helpful for getting everyone to safety and if we need to I'm sure we can hot wire a car or two." I say.

"I know where they last were but I can't guarantee that their still there. Sometimes groups of people would come and go wanting to take the chance to get out of the city."

"Well then let's go man. We also have some others out there looking for them so maybe they found them." T-dog said. Of course at that moment there were three geeks outside the door.

"Man, just can't get a long enough break from geeks can we?" I say.

"Geeks? That's what you call them? It's actually clever, like a carnival geek who will eat anything." Glenn spoke up.

"I actually didn't realize that. I have some friends who called them that first."

"Oh so now your friends with that racist redneck and his brother?" T-dog asked me with a little anger in his voice.

"Relax T-dog, the word just popped in my head. I'm not buddies with Merle and believe it or not Daryl isn't that bad of a person. He just goes a little crazy from time to time and keeps to himself." I say.

"Um guys… can you two perhaps discuss this later?" Glenn piped up.

"Yeah we can. Sorry about that." I pull out my knife and hand it to Glenn "Can you handle this?" I ask handing it to him. He nods and takes the knife. "Okay let's go." We then go out into the city and take down geeks while following Glenn.

* * *

**_"Quel piccolo stronzo!"_* means that little fucker**

**Part two will be the next chapter and finish the Atlanta trip.**


	10. City of the Dead part 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead or any of its characters. Just my OC.**

**Warning: Violence, language, suggestive themes, gory images**

_*Italics mean flashbacks _

_***Italic bold means sound effects.**_

* * *

Chapter 10

Glenn was pretty decent when it came to using a knife but that shouldn't be too surprising considering how long he lasted out here. He managed to sneak up on one of them and kill it quickly while I threw a knife at another one and T-dog bashed the head in of the last one with the butt his riffle.

"Not bad Glenn. What have you been doing to get by?" I asked

"I've basically been using anything I can get my hands on. Crowbars, switchblades, hammers you name it." He said as we started walking down the street. There were only a few geeks roaming the alley we were going down. I threw my knife at the one closest to us and went to get it out, no way was I going to waste these.

"How about a wrench? That was my first weapon against these guys."

"Yeah but the handle was too short and you sometimes need to hit them a couple more times to really get them. Crowbars work better."

"I'll keep that in mind. Look out for a crowbar or one of the other things you mentioned." I said. We turned a corner and we stopped at an apartment building.

"It's mostly studio apartments in here. Small so we'd each just take a room." Glenn said. He gave a couple knocks on the door in a specific pattern.

"How many other people are still alive here if you need a secret knock?" I asked as the door open and a man opened the door. He looked suspiciously at me and T-dog but Glenn gave him the okay to let us in.

"There has been a couple. Some of them were in gangs that didn't care who they had to hurt to get what they want. It got to the point where you couldn't tell who was doing more damage, geeks or the living."

We got into a small room I guess you could call a lobby. It was just a small front room that had some stairs on one side and crappy elevator that could probably only hold two people at once. The doors in the front were barred by tables and whatever chairs or sofas they could move. There was another person who came up and asked Glenn if they had the supplies they needed. He handed them what looked a bottle of some type of medicine and a syringe.

"So I think most of the people are on the second floor. I can go up and tell them about your offer while you two wait here."

"Glenn, is there any chance Reese might be up there? Or is there any chance you may have seen her? If you forget what she looks like she's kind of similar to me except her hair is darker with lighter brown tips, she has a piercing on her right eyebrow and a stud on her nose, she has this tattoo" I pull up the sleeve on hoodie to show him my tattoo. "on the same wrist." I finish. I see the sad look in his eyes and already know my answer.

"I'm sorry, but we haven't had anyone like that in our group. We do have someone from another group arrive today, maybe she knew if Reese was there." He sighs. "I probably shouldn't but you can come up with me and speak to her. She's the one who needed the medicine because she's not well. Just stay behind me while I talk to the others and see if she'll talk to you." He said. I look over at T-dog to see if he's okay with staying down here.

"Go ahead; I'll keep an eye out through this window. See if the others come running by." I nod and follow Glenn up the stairs. As we reach the top I see that most of the doors to rooms are open and some people are talking in the hallways. They all turn to stare at Glenn and peer around him to see me behind him.

"This is Natalie; she received my radio call from last night. Her and some members of her group from outside of Atlanta came to see if we wanted to go with them." He said.

"What makes it any safer out there than here?" One guy asks.

"How do we know she can be trusted? What if they are just here to rob us?" A woman asked. So far this wasn't going that smoothly. However Glenn continued.

"When I went to get the stuff her and her friend downstairs could have robbed me but they didn't. They also helped me fight my way back here. Last night on the radio she said they were set up away from everything, which would most likely include these geeks as they call them and people who are infected or dangerous. Natalie how long have you been there?" He asked me.

"We've been there for over a week. We haven't had any geeks at the site or anyone find us unless we left the camp. We have people keep a look out in shifts to make sure nothing bad happens and we have food, water, tents and protection. If we run low on supplies we can hunt, fish or go on runs to find stuff. I understand if you aren't very trusting, we've all been through a lot, but I can't leave without letting you guys know you have other options." They started to ease up a little after that comment. I hear someone moaning from the room closest to me and turn my head. There's a girl there in either her late twenties or early thirties, she's on the lying on the floor groaning and looks like she's sweating a lot. I get a closer look and realize I've met her before.

"Miranda?" I ask. Not the Miranda that was married to Morales and waiting back at camp but the Miranda that Reese worked with and who we were supposed to be staying with when we got evicted. I go over to her side and see that she's really a mess. Her dyed blonde hair was matted and her face was pale and clammy looking. She definitely didn't look like I usually saw her all done up with her hair in bouncy waves around her face and so much make-up on she could pass for a Barbie doll. "Miranda. It's Natalie, Reese's sister. What happened to you?" I ask in a calm voice, she looked at me like I wasn't there.

"Natalie? I thought you would never show up. Reese said you would come over before she did, I have the room all set up for you guys." She said deliriously. I looked over to see the others hovering.

"What's wrong with her?" I ask.

"She has a fever and an infection." Glenn spoke up. "We're not sure what though, we found her with some long cuts on her arm. She couldn't tell us what happened but we think she scratched herself in the abandon factory building she was found in." I turn my head back to her.

"Miranda, I need you stay with me okay. Don't get scared but we're not at your apartment. Something bad happened and I need you to try to remember how you survived it. These people said you were with another group?" She coughed up some bile and threw up on the floor beside her. I tried not to get grossed out but that didn't stop my stomach from lurching. I could hear some of the other people gagging.

"The news… they said to go to the refugee center. But that was a lie… *hack* hack*… Reese texted me to get out…" So Reese contacted her to? I guess I never knew they were that close. "Then there was fire… smoke… screaming everywhere. I don't know how but I got out of arghhhhhhhhhhhh!" she grabbed her arm as she screamed in pain. Then she started breathing heavy. She was handed a bottle of water and with a shaky hand she drank it.

"You don't have to continue if you can't but Glenn said you were with another group?" she stopped drinking.

"Yeah… some army guys. But they weren't in the tanks. They were just gathering people to save… Reese was there…" I tensed as she said her name. So she really was here in Atlanta. "She was crazy though… kept crying… need to find Nat she would say. Couldn't calm her down… she ran away. A guy followed her and I tried but then there were so many of them." She said before she passed out. I felt numb; she was here but from what Miranda said she was gone. I have no idea where she last saw her but it didn't help to know she was breaking down.

I got up and just stood there. Anger was flowing through me at the thought of my sister having an episode without me by her side and I tried to keep it under control. It wasn't working though, I was shaking and clenching my fists. I was the only one who knew how to help her in those situations, I always brought her back from wherever she went and kept her grounded. Yet all this time I was safe and bonding with other people at camp while she was out here running through the city looking high and low for me.

"Natalie? Are you okay?" I heard Glenn ask behind me. I turned to look at him and saw the concern in his eyes. Fuck, I shouldn't let him see me like this. Actually I shouldn't let anyone here see me like this. I'm supposed to be calm and lead them to the camp.

"Can you just give me a moment? I know her so I can watch her and you and T-dog can talk about the best way to get out of the city and to the van." I say as calmly I can.

"Okay. Let me know if you need anything." He said and hesitantly walked out of the room. Once the door was closed I walked over the window and looked out it. I was trying to find something to focus on; anything will do just as long as I can get rid of this anger. I was scratching at the bottom of the window frame and breathing heavily. I just kept cursing at myself. I was Reese's rock, her protector, the other half of herself she needed to be sane and I was failing. I groaned as I dug my nails deeper in the wood leaving scratch marks on its surface. I was chipping my nails really bad but I didn't care. The only thing that was on my mind was what is the point of trying to be strong when you can't even help the ones you love most.

"Fuck!" I yelled as I slammed my fist against the glass. It cracked a little and I felt my hand sting but it actually helped me calm down a little. I could hear Miranda move a little behind me but I ignored her. I was just thinking about one of the most recent times I was angry.

"_You're not going to hit your target if you're too frustrated." Daryl said as he pulled the arrow out of the tree to hand back to me. It was two days after my big fight with Shane and I was still upset, it seemed like no matter how many times I tried to get over it someone reminded me about it or they were just avoiding me like I was a wild animal who would strike at any moment. _

"_Then how do you do it? You usually have a look on your face like an old man who hasn't taken a shit in a week." I barked back._

"_You shut your mouth! Where do you even get this crazy shit you say anyway?" he asks._

"_From the crazy part of my head. For twenty-three years it's been making people laugh until they couldn't breathe or curse at me until they are out of breath." _

"_Haven't gotten punched or beaten yet?" _

"_Nothing I couldn't handle." My tone got a little serious there and he noticed right away. He changed the subject after that._

"_How'd you get away from them. I thought that dog guy was your body-guard from now on." _

"_His name is T-dog, a decent guy by the way, and Dale knew you were in the woods so he told me I could go as long as I came back before Shane and Lori do from their perimeter watch. That's usually about a good one to two hours so I have some time."_

"_Why'd he let you out here with me? Last I checked he was protective of you and the other girls." _

"_I guess he's starting to trust you a bit." That caught Daryl by surprise and he scrunched up his face a bit. Then he spat at the ground and replied._

"_He shouldn't. Can't trust anyone these days."_

"_No Daryl I think it's mostly just you who can't trust anyone. Dale is one of the most sensible people I have ever met and if he trusts you it's because he has a good reason to." I take a deep breath and shoot my arrow hitting the target dead center. I smirk a little bit and continue with my train of thought to Daryl. "Look I understand not wanting to trust people. I wouldn't trust Shane if he was the last person on earth but that doesn't stop me from trusting anyone else. Isn't there anyone besides Merle you trust, even if it's just a little bit?" I ask. Of course Daryl had to be immature about his emotions and not give me an honest answer._

"_For god's sake Falco you're pushy. Pushy and hotheaded, no wonder you have trouble getting along with men." He said._

"_Well in my past the guys liked it if I put my anger into other things…" I say with a suggestive look on my face. Once again Daryl got tense and I couldn't help but laugh. "Man! You act like such a prude. How can someone who has a brother like Merle Dixon be such a prude?" I ask starting to feel better._

"_I'm not a fucking prude! Your mind is just stuck in the gutter all the time." He said._

"_It's not all the time Dixon. It's just nice to loosen up a little bit from time to time, god I've wanted to do that for days. You should try it too. I'm not saying it has to be a drastic change but just let go of some of that tension you've been carrying around." His stare lessens in intensity as I say this. Probably because it's one of the few moments where I'm being genuine with him instead of mouthing off as he would put it. I think a bit of humor is there as he takes a step closer to me, I tense a slightly because last time he got this close I ended up being pinned to the ground. _

"_You got a problem with my attitude Falco?" he asks. I roll my eyes and smile._

"_Not me but your silent don't fuck with me attitude isn't everyone's cup of tea." I say back._

"_I thought women liked the strong silent type."_

"_Some, but for some women you need a little more substance. A personality can be very sexy." I say. It got quiet after that. We were just standing there awkwardly not sure what to say next, even I have to admit that maybe I went a little too far even though that was absolutely nothing compared to what I said earlier. That was teasing; this felt kind of like flirting (something I will never admit to Amy or anyone else). Daryl broke me out those thoughts._

"_Ya should probably get going. Almost been two hours." My eyes widen. Shane and Lori would probably be coming back soon and I did not want to get in another fight._

"_Shit!" I say and start sprinting towards camp._

"_Don't fall." I hear Daryl say as I take off._

"_Shut up!" I say as I almost lose my footing._

Oddly enough I wasn't angry anymore after the memory ended. God why did it take a memory of Daryl and I to calm me down? Why wasn't it something like Dale being a fatherly figure or hanging out with Amy, the kids laughing or even my goddamn family? Why is it a simple memory of bickering and teasing with Daryl that calms me down? Oh god please tell me I'm not turning into one of those girls who depends on a guy to feel better, I always hated that. Nope, not even going to consider it. I don't even like Daryl that way, he's just someone kind of similar to me and that's always comforting for people.

As I'm giving myself a mental pep talk something catches my eye out the window. Someone's walking down the street towards the rougher looking area of the neighborhood, I take a closer look and see that it's Merle but there is no sign of Andrea or Morales with him.

"Merle what the hell are you…" All of a sudden I'm being slammed against the glass as someone attacks me from behind. I hear shouting and gunshots downstairs but I'm more concerned with the fact that I'm being slammed back and forth against the glass as I try to escape the grip of whoever is attacking me. The cracks in the glass increase as I slam against the glass. I manage to get the upper hand and turn around to see my attacker. I'm greeted by cold dead eyes framed by blonde hair as my attacker tries to bite me. I realize that it's Miranda and she's dead now. Those scratches must have been from a geek and not from some machinery in a warehouse. I scream as I push with all of my might and manage to turn the situation around and slam her against the window. It shatters under her weight and she falls out with me following her. However my fall is cut short as I feel a pair of arms wrap around my waist and pull me back inside. I land on my butt and see Glenn hovering over me.

"Are you okay?" He asks me. I notice there's blood on his shirt and I hear screaming coming from downstairs.

"Yeah, she turned but she didn't bite me." I say, I look at my hoodie and see that there weren't any scratch marks so I'm not infected (luckily).

"We gotta get going! They barged in from the back, head for the roof!" he shouted as he pulled me up and was half dragging me towards the door. I see T-dog running up the stairs saying that there's to many of them and I see the woman from earlier get caught and bitten. I had no time to feel sorry for her though as Glenn pushes me up the stairs and I start running on my own. I counted at least four flights of stairs before we reached the roof. Unfortunately there wasn't a fire escape and there was a gap between the buildings. Crap! We were trapped!

"What are we going to do?" T-dog asked "We can't jump that far to the next building!" he shouted. I looked around and saw that there were long construction boards.

"Can we use those to cross?" I asked pointing them out. They looked at where I was pointing and Glenn spoke up.

"Yeah but they won't be able to support a lot of weight. Gotta go one at a time quickly and if one breaks we'll have to use another." He said. Quickly one of the other guys that managed to escape got a board and gently put it between the two buildings to make sure it didn't fall. I insisted on the two people without weapons going first for when the geeks break through the door.T-dog however was fighting me on going next.

"No way am I going before you! You're smaller than me and I'm going to break it."

"No you're not. And I rather have someone smaller on this end go last that way there's more support on the other side." The banging on the door was getting louder.

"Go!" I shout at him! He reluctantly goes across the board and it's only me Glenn, a woman and another man on this side. Once he's off close to the other side the board breaks. My stomach drops a bit as I see T-dog fall but he manages to grab the ledge and the people on the other side help him up.

"Okay quick! Grab another!" Me and Glenn quickly grab another one and usher the woman along when we hear shouts from below. I look down and see that Andrea and Morales are on the streets waving their arms trying to get our attention, they looked relieved when they saw me but that didn't last long as the door burst open and geeks came piling out.

"Crap!" I shout and I take my gun out and start shooting. Unfortunately I have never fired a gun before and the recoil knocked me off-balance so I missed.

"Natalie! Are you okay?" Glenn asked.

"Glenn go! I promised you I'd get you to safety, don't make me break it."

"But…" He got interrupted as the last guy left with us got ambushed by at least four geeks once the bullets in his gun ran out.

"Go! I'll be right behind you!" I shout.

He hesitated but he obeyed and started walking across the plank. I raised my gun and kept trying to shoot what I could. I had to change my strategy because I kept failing at shooting straight at their heads, instead I aimed for the legs and as they fell I shot at their heads before they could start crawling towards me. I kept hearing shouts from various voices, mostly Glenn and T-Dog shouting for me to come over and I heard some from Andrea and Morales down below but I couldn't tell what they were saying. Once I felt that I shot at enough I got on the plank and started to go forward. I was trying desperately not to look down or anywhere but in front of me. I was wobbling like crazy from fear and it didn't help that I could hear Andrea trying to shout encouraging words to me from below and Glenn and T-dog were frantically beckoning me to keep going and reaching out their hands to grab me when I got close. I was almost there when I felt the plank gain more weight on the other side and it started shaking erratically. The screaming got more frantic and I looked around to see that one of the geeks had grabbed the board and was trying to reach out to grab me.

**_Bang! Bang!_**

I heard those noises so close to me and I froze. I thought I had gotten used to the sounds of gunshots but hearing them soar through the air so close to me made me go still and my mind went erratic. I was getting flashes in my head but oddly enough they weren't images. If I could describe it I would say it was like static on a radio, you only hear certain parts very faintly.

"_Run!"_

"_don't you dare touch her!"_

"… _You bitch!" _

"… _Get out!"_

"_I'm your priority… she's in the way!"_

**_Bang!_**

"_No! You bastard!"_

_Then there was a sickening sound of someone choking and there was a thud. A flash went through my head of three people in a small room. I couldn't see well because it was dark and I was on the ground. There was crying, I could vaguely make out a shape crumpled up on the floor and I heard a familiar click of a gun._

"… _I'm sorry!"_

**_Bang!_** "Ah!" I screamed as I felt pain graze my arm. My vision was going red in pain and I heard the board below me finally give out.

**_Crack!_** It finally broke under all the weight and stress and I felt myself begin to fall. It lasted probably three seconds before I felt two sets of hands grip my wrists. Pain was shooting through my right arm from all the stress that it has gone through and I let out a howl of pain as I was being pulled up. I'm placed on the ground leaning against the wall still in pain and I see that Glenn and T-dog were my rescuers and were trying to talk to me but there was still a ringing in my ears. They finally stopped trying to talk to me and were talking to each other when I could finally understand them.

"She's bleeding!" T-Dog said.

"Looks like it didn't go through. We got to sterilize it and wrap it so it doesn't get infected." Glenn said and pulled me up and had me lean against him.

"I'm fine…" I say finally finding my voice. There was still a burning feeling on my arm but I didn't want to burden Glenn. "I can walk. It's just my arm." I say but I'm still wobbling for some reason, I think that's mostly from shock though and not the actual wound.

"Yeah right. Look you've done enough already, let someone else help you." Glenn said as we got to the door and started climbing down the stairs, I didn't know what hurts more, the burning feeling on my arm from whoever was shooting or my ego for being half-carried by Glenn. I could probably just walk down while clutching my wound but he was insisting on helping me, we were halfway down when we ran into Andrea and Morales who were rushing up the stairs.

"Are you all okay?" Morales asked.

"Who was shooting?" I asked immediately wanting to know who the dumb fuck was who thought they could kill a geek from the ground.

"I was." Andrea admitted. "But I stopped once you almost fell Natalie, are you okay?" I wanted to rip her throat out at that moment. How could Andrea think she had any chance of shooting that thing with her little gun she always carried around? The way those bullets were flying it was like she was blindfolded. Of course I didn't get a chance to say all this because Glenn decided to speak for me.

"She got grazed by one of the bullets on her right arm. Now that were mostly safe I think we should look at it and see if we can stop the bleeding."

"Oh my god Natalie! I'm sorry. When I saw you in danger I just wanted to help." She was apologizing but I didn't want to hear it at that point, if she hadn't started shooting I probably wouldn't have froze like I did and could have managed to get to the other side safely. I was sat down on a bench against the wall and Glenn was looking at my wound with Andrea and Morales hovering over us and the others were searching the rooms around us.

"Okay I'm no doctor but I can see it's not that deep. I just need to stop the bleeding and wrap it up." He helped me out of my hoodie and I let out a moan of pain as we slid the one sleeve off my injured arm. T-Dog came in the room with some type of box in his hands.

"We got lucky. Found a first aid kit. It's got gauze pads, disinfectant, bandages and all types of stuff that's going to be helpful." He set it down next to me and Glenn grabbed one of the gauze pads to clot the bleeding.

"Anything I can do to help?" Andrea asked.

"You've done enough." I said bitterly. She looked upset by my statement but backed off. When this is all over I'll have to have a talk with her about shooting because it seems like she doesn't have much experience with that gun. Everyone noticed the tension but it seemed like they were trying to ignore it.

"Okay the bleeding stopped, now I got to disinfect it." Glenn said as he picked up a bottle labeled iodine. Crap that's the stuff that really hurts! "This is going to hurt, just try to hold still." He said. I nodded trying to put on a brave face but once that substance was applied to my wound it didn't last long.

"Ah! Son of a bitch!" I shouted as I tried to sit still but my body had other plans. T-Dog had to pin my other arm to the wall and everyone was cringing as I was grunting trying to keep calm. Not my most ladylike moment as my mother used to say when Reese cursed in front of me but now did not feel like the time to act like a proper woman. Fortunately my wound was soon clean and after some antibiotic ointment was applied my arm was being wrapped up in bandages.

"All done." Glenn said

"How you feeling?" Morales asked

"Stings a little but I think I'll get by. Thanks for your help Glenn. I can walk now; I think it was just the shock of everything happening all at once that made me act like that." And the weird memory that popped into my head but I didn't want to mention that. I don't even know if it was real or not but I can't rule it out, I just wish that it didn't come up during a life or death situation.

"No need to thank me. We'll call it even for responding to me." God he was nice. If Reese were here right now she'd be teasing me about how nice he is and give me an I told you so look for wanting to hook us up. But right now romance is the last thing on mind.

* * *

We got out of the building and got as far away from the building we escaped as possible. The other people whose names I didn't remember still looked upset over what happened. They probably bonded or had prior relationships to the others who lost their lives during the attack. I wanted to feel bad about what happened to Miranda but I couldn't for some reason. Sure she had tried to kill me and I defended myself but she wasn't just some random geek. I had known her while she was alive. Sure she was closer to Reese because they worked together and the only times I saw her were when she was working but she was kind enough to let two people who needed help into her home. I want to feel something about her death; I don't want to be one of those people who feel completely numb about death. I need to remember that these geeks were alive once, they were just unfortunate enough to get infected. Sadly Miranda was one of those people but I didn't notice she turned because I was more focused on Reese and the Dixons… wait a minute… Merle was still gone!

"Andrea, Morales, do you guys know where Merle went off to? I'm pretty sure I saw him walk down this way before everything happened." I ask, how could we have not mention Merle this whole time? Okay maybe it's because he's an asshole that no one besides me would mind if he disappeared. Heck, the only reason I would mind is because Daryl would completely lose his shit if Merle didn't come back and I also hate the idea of anyone being separated from their family if it can be prevented. They both gave each other looks before Andrea spoke up.

"Well we weren't really together when shit hit the fan. He kind of went crazy and ran off. But if I had to guess I think he went down that road to the rougher looking apartments hoping to loot some stuff people left behind." I saw where she was pointing and I knew what she meant by looting some stuff. Merle was probably off looking for drugs, and I have a pretty good feeling of where he would find some.

"Okay I get it. I'll go get him." I say and I saw them try to follow me but I stopped them.

"Don't. If he's up to something it might be better if I handle this by myself. You guys should focus on getting to the van. If I'm not back in about an hour I want you guys to go without us, it's going to get dark soon and be hard to find camp." As I walk away I hear Andrea call my name and I turn around to see what she wants.

"Natalie I just want to apologize again for what happened. I didn't want you to get hurt and I didn't know you would go into shock like that." She said in a hushed tone, she probably didn't want anyone to hear our conversation.

"That's the thing Andrea, you didn't know but you did it anyway. You didn't think about the consequences or who could get hurt." I said back quietly, I don't feel like humiliating her in front of the group. "You also were firing that thing like crazy, do you have any experience with that thing?" I ask her.

"My dad gave me this gun when me and Amy went on our road trip." She said avoiding my question. Crap, she probably has no prior experience with that thing and we were letting her come on a life or death trip. We can't have people who aren't properly trained going off with them, that's just as bad as giving the kids one.

"Look Andrea. The others might not know or they are just staying out of it but it's obvious to me you don't have much experience with guns and I am in no way an expert myself. Why do you think I try to stick with knives and arrows? Don't give me that look, you know it's dangerous and if you ask me I think you need to get your shit together if you want to do stuff like this. You want to protect Amy, be a part of the group and be taken seriously you need to take yourself seriously or else someone is going to get hurt."

I walk away from her after I said that hope that she takes what I said to heart. We can't have a hotshot on the team because that usually ends in disaster anytime something happens. I may have only gotten a minor injury but who's to say she won't get someone killed. If she hurts anyone I will not hesitate to rip her head off. The last thing we need now is to be afraid of each other when everything else is out to get us. I approach the building that I have a feeling Merle would be in. It looks like a crack den and hasn't been properly taken care of in years. It's surprising that it hasn't been condemned for safety reasons a long time ago but I know that this is definitely the place to go looking for blow, pot, or anything you can think of. How do I know this? Am I just judging from looks? No, because I spent the past couple months here getting used to all the horrible smells and not getting a second-hand high. This was the very same building that I got evicted from.

* * *

I walk up the concrete steps and open the door. It still looks the same as the day I left it, dirty carpet in the front entrance, tarnished mailboxes built into the striped wallpaper walls that were peeling and a hallway that leads to the stairs on the left and the entrance to the landlord's office on the right. I saw boot prints in the carpet that looked fresh confirming my suspicion that Merle was here.

"Merle?" I shout. "Are you here? We got to go!" I shout as I walk further in. I hear a shuffle coming from behind the door. He must be searching through Larry's things. I walk over to the door and see a silhouette through the glass part of the door. I roll my eyes and walk into the office.

"Merle come on! We found them, it's time to…" but as I walk in I freeze. It's not Merle that I'm looking at. It's Larry but he's clearly dead and has been for some time. Not that it matters because to me Larry always looked like shit but now he looked absolutely grotesque with large bite marks on his arms and his gut all bloated. I see that there is blood on the floor and a pair of female legs behind the desk and I feel the urge to throw up as I think of what possibly happened here. He lets out a snarl and lunges for me. I duck under his arms evading his attack but I over did it and rammed myself against his desk. I hiss in pain as my side slams against it and turn around to face him. I grab my knife and prepare myself for him to strike but before he can blood gushes from the back of his head and he falls forward with a dying whimper. Merle is behind him and he pulls his knife out of his skull and cleans it off on his shirt.

"Why are you always getting into trouble Falco? Can't you ever be a good little girl for once?" he says while he cleans his knife.

"Trust me Merle I don't ask for this. And I wouldn't be here if you had just stuck with the group." I reply. My eyes however are still on Larry. His still form is on the ground and yet I feel nothing but absolute hatred for him. Seeing his face reminds me of everything that happened, and how things could have been different if he were a more decent person. Merle notices my stare and calls me out on it.

"What? Know this man? He an ex because you are looking at him with a glare even the devil would shit his pants if he was on the other end of it."

"I know him but he is definitely not an ex. He's the reason I was on the side of the road that night you found me. Piece of shit threw me out, tried to sexually harass me, took advantage of who knows how many desperate women to get satisfaction and took away the one place me and my sister were able to call home in a long time." As I say this anger is rolling off of me. Everything I was feeling the day I was kicked out and when I found out Reese was going crazy looking for me was flowing through me again and I'm afraid I won't be able to control it.

"Well then" Merle says breaking me out of my trance "I say you earned the right to let off some steam."

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Guy's already dead. He won't feel anything. Besides from what you said he sounds like a piece of shit, why does he get to die without you giving him a piece of your mind?" I thought he was kidding but there was no humor in his voice like there usually is. I don't know why or how I let it happen but I took his advice and just let myself go. I started kicking at him, then I was stomping on his head. I was angry as hell and I wasn't holding back.

"You nasty little shit! Thought you were better than everyone because you had power! You were weak though!" I shout as I continue to stomp on him. "Preying on young women who had nowhere to go unless they got on their hands and knees for you."

**_Stomp! _**

"Letting criminals and drug dealers stay here so long as you got a cut of the profits."

**_Stomp!_**

"Threatening my sister and calling her names when she had done nothing to you."

**_Stomp!_**

"Then you try to make me one of your toys! But I refused!"

**_Stomp!_**

"I refused and you threw me out like garbage! But I'm not! I'm stronger than you ever were and I've seen men like you. You all end up looking pathetic while I survive in this shit hole world you think you rule!" I shout and as I stomp the words I heard from the rooftop come back to me.

"… _You bitch!" _

"_I'm your priority… she's in the way!" _the male voice shouted in my head. It sounds familiar but I can't remember who it belongs to. I just see a shadow of a man as he holds a gun to me.

"_You're better off dead!"_

_Bang!_

I gasp and fall backwards. I'm trembling as I see what I have done. Larry's head was now smashed open and blood and brains were scattered on the floor. I didn't hesitate this time and I emptied my stomach full of bile on the floor. I can't believe I did that. I didn't even know that I had that amount of rage filled in me. I look up to see Merle staring at me.

"Feel better now?" He asks. In a sick way I do. I hate to admit it but I felt better, not like earlier when I thought about my time in the woods with Daryl though. It was nothing like this. I felt disgusted, relieved, satisfied and ashamed of what I had done. However, if I hadn't done this to the now completely dead Larry than I may have done it to someone else. Someone who didn't deserve it and I would become that monster from my dream. So maybe in a sick way Merle did help me.

"Bottom left drawer." I say.

"What?"

"Check the bottom left drawer. Larry used to accept gifts from the dealers who lived here. But be discreet about it if you use it at camp. Be in the woods and don't you dare do it around the kids or I will not hesitate to kick your ass." I say and walk out of the office to wait for him. I go back to the mailboxes and look at the one that was owned by Reese and I. The name tag fell off like it usually did and out of habit I bent down and picked it up. As I try to put it back on the little door opens and I see a piece of paper folded up in there. My heart races as I pull it out and see that it's in Reese's handwriting.

_Nat,_

_If you get this letter than I want you to know that I'm still alive. Mason has taken good care of me and he and some of his other army buddies are trying to save as many people as they can. They've gone rogue from the military because they didn't agree with their solutions. I don't think I'll be able to come back here again for a while. _

_I ran here out of instinct just hoping it was all a dream and you would be waiting for me in our apartment. I'm trying to stay strong to find you but those thoughts keep coming back to me. If you find this please write on the back. Don't stay there and wait for me because we will be finding shelter outside the city and won't be back for a month at least. But I will come back because I know that you'll come here eventually, and we will be together again._

_Be strong. I love you,_

_Reese_

I feel tears running down my eyes as I read her words. The words are hard to make out because she wrote in a frenzy but I could still read them. There were tally marks on the paper that indicated how many days it had been since we've been separated, I guess it was her way of dating it. If I'm correct I missed her by one day. She's gone now, but she is safe. She's also in my place, in a group trying to survive but still looking for me. I find the pencil she used and quickly scribble on the back I'm safe and to leave notes and look for me here or at our old pizza place. Just as I put it back in the mailbox I hear Merle come out of the office and he's wearing a big smile on his face. Must have found what he was looking for.

"You keep surprising me Falco. Maybe you're more like me and my brother after all."

"I'm nothing like you Merle and I don't think Daryl is either."

"You gotta come out of that fantasy land you live in soon enough. I saw what you did in there, that wasn't just about him. You can't let go of your past, it's in your blood and you're going to crack real soon. Just leave me and my bro out of it when you do"

I want to roll my eyes and ignore his words but I can't this time. What if he's right, what if I'm losing control over everything I've tried to keep up all my life? Will it kill me or will it free me completely?

* * *

It was a long ride back to the camp. But instead of being stuck with Merle, Glenn sat next to me. He saw the look on my face when I came back with Merle and started talking to me about everything and anything to cheer me up. It kind of worked because he was pretty cool and funny guy. He managed to make me laugh and didn't look at me weird when I said something random or made a sarcastic remark. He just laughed with me and kept the conversation going. I could see Merle look over from time to time looking pissed. Well sucks for him because I think I found a new guy friend and an excuse not to be the center of all Merle's unwanted affection.

We finally arrived back at camp and we all filed out of the car. Morales' family engulfed him in a big hug and Amy practically tackled Andrea to the ground. T-Dog was greeted by Jacqui and Merle just went off to his tent and grunted a sup towards his brother. I was just standing by Glenn and the others pointing out who was who and warning them about Merle and Ed's temper tantrums. I was called away by Dale who hugged me as I got near him.

"Glad you're okay. Although I wish that I could say you were in one piece." He said pointing towards the bandage on my arm.

"It's just a scratch Dale. Glenn got me all cleaned up. I just have to continue to take care of it." As I say this I feel someone tackle me and see that Amy had stopped talking to Andrea and came to see how I was doing. I also saw that the kids were behind her staring up at me in awe.

"Natalie I'm so glad you're safe!" Amy said very fast. "Andrea told me about the geeks and what happened on the building. How did you manage to stay calm?" she asked me. I doubt that Andrea told her everything otherwise she'd probably be a little more upset about my injury. I felt a little flustered at being put in the spotlight but T-Dog decided to be the one to tell the story.

"Man you should have seen her. She was like Xena warrior princess taking down geeks like it was nothing. Arrows, knives you name it and she probably used it!" I rubbed the back of my neck in embarrassment from what T-dog was saying. The kids were hanging onto every word he said and I saw Sophia look up at me like I was a god or something. It really didn't feel like that to me and he was leaving out the part where I was terrified trying to cross the rooftops. Not something a warrior princess would do.

"I think you're over exaggerating T-Dog. We all did what we could and made it out of there. Although I do wish we could have saved more people." I say. That causes a look of sadness and realization on some of their faces.

"So you didn't find her." Dale said. I shook my head.

"No but she was there. I found a friend of hers who confirmed it before she died. I also have places where can meet eventually, she left a note at our old place saying she was safe but won't be back for a month."

"So it wasn't all for nothing!" Amy said excitedly.

"Of course it wasn't. Even if I didn't find anything out about my sister I still would have saved Glenn and the others." I say back.

"Natalie is right. You guys did the right thing." Dale said clapping his hand on my good shoulder.

After that we disperse and I look over to see Daryl hanging around but not interacting with others. I walk over to him not caring if anyone looked at us weirdly for it.

"What? I get no welcome back?" I joke as I approach him.

"I told you you'd come back. Besides everyone else was ganging up on you wanting to hear about everything the warrior princess did." He said the last part with sarcasm.

"Hey you may laugh but I did pretty well for myself. I wouldn't call myself a warrior princess but I'm not going to deny it was the toughest I've ever been."

"What happened to your arm then? Is that the reason your covered in blood?" he asked looking at the bandage and my attire. My shoes are covered in blood and I'm sure I had plenty of blood splatter on my face from stabbing walkers. Of course Daryl would be the one person who wouldn't believe me when I said it's just a scratch so I might as well tell the truth or a least part of it.

"I got grazed by a bullet. But I got it taken care of. Ever had Iodine poured on a wound?" I ask.

"Don't try to distract me. Who shot at you?" he asked.

"It was an accident. I just got in the way of a geek and paid the price. But it was worth it because I know my sister is alive." I could see that he didn't fully believe my story but he wasn't pursuing it. I heard my name being called and saw that Amy and Glenn were waving me over.

"Who's the Chinese kid? You seem chummy already."

I laugh at that. "Chummy huh? Well if you must know his name is Glenn and we actually met before this shit storm happened."

"What's he to you?" He asked with a curious tone.

"He's my mail order husband who got separated from me and we plan to make long passionate love tonight." I try to say with a straight face but I end up cracking and try to hold in my laughter.

"Why are you so weird? Did you get shot in the head?" He asked looking at me in disgust.

"No I did not. And Glenn was just a guy I'd see around the city from time to time but never really became friends. But hey who knows what we could turn into, you won't accept my offer to fool around so maybe he will." I say and walk off towards Amy and Glenn.

* * *

Daryl's POV

Natalie walked over to Amy and the new kid leaving Daryl by himself. He couldn't help but notice that she looked happy as she was talking to them, it almost looked like they had been friends for a long time. They could have looked like a normal group of young adults hanging out if two of them weren't covered in blood and sweat. Merle came up to him at that moment.

"Well looks like we've been dumped. Now that she's got a new boy toy she'll never want to be around us anymore." He said.

"What makes you think she wanted to be anyway? Probably just dealt with us out of boredom and you kept insisting." Daryl replied with some anger in his voice. He didn't know why but Merle's words bothered him for some reason.

"Now don't tell me you were getting attached D. You know if this outbreak didn't happen you'd never would have met her right? Wouldn't look at us twice if she met us then and she's not going to anymore now."

He wasn't going to admit it to Merle but he actually had a point for once. Watching Natalie with people her own age he could picture her in a normal situation. For some reason he had this image in his head of her in a city and they were both walking down a sidewalk. They bumped right into each other and she just muttered an apology but didn't even look his way. Then the scene changes and she's in a park now greeting the new kid. They embrace and walk away talking and laughing, the same laugh he was hearing now. That mental image gave him a weird feeling in his gut but he knows that that's how her life should be, not fighting geeks and hanging out in the woods with him. Maybe this was finally the right time to let her go, he could leave with Merle when the time was right and know that she can take care of herself and has other people to fall back on.

"I'm not getting attached. She was just using me to learn how to defend herself, now I'm not needed. I'm going hunting tomorrow, be gone for a few days searching the mountains. You coming?"

"Nah, I got other plans." gestured to the bag and Daryl could see a crack pipe that he must have acquired during his trip to Atlanta.

"Don't do that shit in front of them."

"I'm not. You've been hanging around Falco to long, starting to sound like her."

"Shut up asshole." Daryl said before retiring to his tent.

* * *

**End of Chapter.**

**Yay I finally got this done! I was not sure when I would because I had to babysit my 10 month old nephew almost everyday this week. Can't have the computer out because he always tries to play with it and mess something up. But it did give me time to get over some writers block and decide to try to upload one chapter every Friday. Almost didn't upload today because I had to babysit him and then drive over an hour back home. Then I had to proof read and some things to this chapter before uploading so I'm sorry for all the people who got the alerts late at night, I just had to post it while I could. **

**So now I have almost everyone in the season one group except for Rick. Oh and I'm warning ahead of time that the other people who came with Glenn will not be mentioned a lot or given names because I only want to focus on the main group but I remembered that were some background characters that never had any lines but were just there to get killed off at the end of Vatos. I also realized that I named a character Miranda in chapter one forgetting that Morales' wife was also named Miranda (whoops), so I just killed her off here instead of having her come to camp like I originally planned to avoid confusion.  
**

**Oh and even though it kind of seems like it I'm not having Natalie have any romantic feelings or moments with Glenn. There will be no love triangles (They aggravate me more than entertain me) Glenn will be Natalie's friend because I really loved him in season one (more so than Daryl believe it or not, but then seasons two and three made me like Daryl more than Glenn).**

**Okay long authors note, if you stuck with it this long I thank you and feel free to leave a review and tell me parts that you like so far, what you hope could happen in future installments, or just anything you want to say. I'm always interested in what people think and I really respect opinions and wishes for the story so long as I feel it will flow with what I have in mind for later on. **


	11. Wind-down

**Thank you to all who have favorited and/or followed my story. Response to reviews;**

**bridgetlynn: Thanks for reading and telling me everyone is in character! Yeah there were times in the show where Dale was too opinionated but in my opinion he does try to help people (even if it wasn't always the best idea cuz like you said there is a lot of grey area in a zombie apocalypse). Hope you like what's to come :)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead television show or comic book(obviously but I do this to avoid problems). Just my OC Natalie.**

**Warning: Language and drinking are mentioned.**

* * *

**Chapter 11**

**Natalie's POV**

It has been three days since I got back from Atlanta and things have been pretty calm lately. I've spent more time with Glenn and Amy having them get to know each other. I remember what Amy said about having dibs on the next cute guy to come by so I've been trying to see if she was serious about it. However, because I'm with them a lot more it meant that I haven't had much time to hang out with Daryl who seems like he's been avoiding me. It didn't faze me when I first found out he was going to go hunting but before he left I would catch glances of him and he looked even more distant and pissed than usual. I wanted to confront him about it to see what was up but he would always walk away from me when he saw me coming or would go talk to Merle. However I remind myself that he's only been gone for a day and a half so far and I'm probably over thinking things.

I'm in my tent now treating my wound and sorting some laundry I was going to do today. Luckily my wound is healing nicely and there is no sign of infection. It only stings slightly now so I can still do chores like laundry and carrying the heavy baskets. I'm just about to wrap it again when I hear someone call out from inside.

"Natalie? It's Carol, can I come in?" she shouts. I'm kind of surprised its Carol, usually it's Amy, Glenn or Dale who come by my tent but Carol has been more friendly to me since I got back.

"Sure. I'm decent." I say. She comes in the tent and see's that I'm wrapping my wound. She winces a little seeing it looking a little bruised and scabbed.

"How is it?"

"A lot better believe it or not. It just stings a bit, I probably don't have to wrap it anymore but I don't want to gross the kids out."

"Well that's partly why I came. I heard that you were on laundry duty today and wanted to help you carry some of it down."

"That's sweet Carol but you don't have to. I'm okay with moving stuff." She waved her arm though dismissing my comment.

"Trust me Natalie, it's heavy enough carrying it without an injury. Plus we got stuff from the kids and guys too." I didn't realize that we had that much.

"Well when you put it that way I think I'll take you up on that offer. I'll just grab some of my stuff that I want clean and leave what I don't need behind." As I finish that I hear someone else stumble into my tent and see Glenn with a basket.

"Hey Nat, thought I'd help you out." He said walking towards a pile of clothes. I start to snicker a bit thinking of how cute it is that he always wants to help but this is going to get awkward.

"It's okay Glenn, Carol is going to help me and I'm not incapable of doing laundry." I say finishing wrapping my arm.

"But you're still hurt, and it doesn't seem that fair that the women have to do all the laundry. That's really sexist…" he stops as he picks up a pair of panties from my dirty pile, he flings them across the tent like they are tainted and me and Carol are just holding in our laughter at the horrified expression on his face.

"Haha! Don't worry Glenn it's not a grenade. But why don't you go see what Dale and Jim are doing, I think they'd be glad to teach you stuff about engines."

"Yeah… that's probably a good idea." He says in a daze and walks out of my tent. Me and Carol just start laughing really hard.

"Men!" Carol says

"Yeah, Glenn is sweet and can kill a geek but he's just so awkward when it comes to women." I say as I go grab the discard underwear, put it in my basket and pick it up.

"Personal experience?" she asks

"If that's your way of asking if anything is going on between us then no. I need him more as a friend than a boyfriend."

We walk out of my tent and go grab more laundry left in a pile in front of each tent, Lori came up with the "great" idea that the women should do all the laundry for the camp. I wanted to roll my eyes and share my disgust about washing the guy's sweaty clothes and underwear but I've been picking my battles lately. Everyone just got over the last time I flipped out about the rules and I don't want to cause drama like that again. As I grab some clothes in front of the Lori's tent Carl and Sophia come running by.

"Hey Nat!" Sophia says happily.

"…Hi" Carl says shyly. I'm pretty sure he's confused about how to treat me. On the one hand he and Sophia look up to me because of how "brave" and fun I am when watching them but on the other hand I don't get along that well with his mom and I really don't get along with Shane who he idolizes.

"Hey guys. What's the rush?" I ask wondering why they're running so fast.

"We're playing hide and seek!" Sophia said. "Louis is counting and we need to find a place to hide." Oh how I envied the kids sometimes.

"Glad you're having fun but be careful. We can't have you guys wandering too far from camp and don't go near the Dixon's truck or bike. You can hide by my car if you want; no one ever goes over there but me anyway." They both smile when I say that and go running off. I chuckle when I see them avoid the truck and motorcycle like one of the brothers was going to run out any moment to yell at them. I grab the pile of clothes and as I pass Glenn, Dale and Jim I ask them to keep an eye on the kids. They agree and I walk ahead to catch up with Carol.

"Man do I wish I could be one of the kids right now." I say to Carol as we make our way down to the lake.

"I think you're just saying because you'd get out of laundry." We both laugh at that. "But if you ask them they'd wish to be your age. Carl keeps going on about wanting to go on patrols with Shane and I've seen Sophia pretending she's shooting a bow and arrow from time to time."

"Well I don't know if I can talk sense into Carl but if you're okay with it I wouldn't mind giving Soph some lessons for fun."

"I don't think Ed and I would be comfortable with that." She said her face hardening. She always gets tense anytime Ed is brought up in a conversation, not a sign of a happy relationship (if that can even possible with Ed). She also had a bruise around her eye that she was trying to hide with make-up but she must be running out because it barely covered the whole thing. I don't think I can keep my mouth shut about it much longer but I also don't want to break my ties with Carol by butting into her business. I see a little bit of my mother in her, doing whatever it takes to take care of her daughter no matter how bad she feels.

"I can understand that. I just want you to know that I'm here for you and Sophia." We reach the water and start sorting the laundry, I was taking the kids and women's clothes and Carol was taking the men's clothes.

"Thank you Natalie for looking out for us, you're Sophia's hero. She wants to be like you when she's older and I would be glad if she was but I just hate the idea of her dealing with those geeks."

"I get that. It's hard to picture Soph, Carl or any child in these situations. Hell I still can't believe everything I've done; it sounds like a whole different person."

"Well it's a person that people need in times like this." She had a distant look in her eyes as she was washing someone's shirt.

"Try telling that to Shane, almost every other day he looks like he wants to throw me out of camp and oh god please tell me this isn't his!" I say as I accidentally pick up some dirty underwear from a guy's pile. I must have gotten distracted while talking to Carol "Dammit whose bag did I just pick up, I need to know if I have to wash my hand or boil it with water so hot my hand will melt off."

"Let's see… oh that's…" she started giggling a bit. "That's the Dixon's bag."

"Oh god! Now I know how Glenn felt!" I say as I dip my hand into the water scrubbing it like I had a stain that wouldn't come out. "With my luck it's probably Merle's and I'm going to get some type of disease." Carol was still laughing.

"God Natalie! I almost forgot how young you were for a while."

"Maturity has nothing to do with age Carol. It's a state of mind and I'm pretty sure the most mature person in the world would have the same reaction to that." I say.

"Well let's just say that it's Daryl's. Does that make you feel any better?" She asks. My eyes go wide for a minute when she says that.

"Well I'm probably less likely to get a disease so I guess it does."

"How can you be sure?"

"Because he's not a total pig like his brother. He's just rude sometimes." Like right now since he keeps avoiding me, I don't know why it bugs me but it does.

"Well it looks like you're almost done. How about I take the last bag and finish up."

"Are you sure Carol? You've done enough for me already."

"I'm fine. Go drop those off, check on Sophia for me and then we'll call it even."

"Deal." I say with a smile as I get up and collect the stuff.

"You know Carol; I can see why Sophia always talks about you when she's around me. You're stronger than you think you are and a good woman, don't ever think that's underrated when times get really bad." I say as I walk off.

"Natalie!" she shouts at me. "Thank you."

"Just telling the truth. What you and Sophia have makes me miss my mom." I walk away at that point and my heart feels heavy after what I just said.

* * *

**Later that night**

"I'm so bored." Amy said as we sat around a low burning fire. It was a little one that just had her, Glenn and me because we wanted to have a night away from the group. Some of the adults deemed it the "kid's fire" which made the real kids want their own fire but that was put to rest immediately.

"Well you wanted to have this fire by ourselves so we could do anything we want without Andrea judging you. It's not our fault we're running out of stuff to talk about." I say.

"We could play a card game." Glenn suggests, "War or poker."

"Poker's only fun if it's for cash or to strip Glenn, and if you want to do the latter I got to warn you I have a mean poker face." I say, even in the glow of the fire I could see his face glow red and Amy and I start to laugh. God I love how awkward he is.

"Never mind then. It's not my fault there's not much to do."

"Hang on I got an idea." I say as I grab a bottle out of my backpack.

"Is that what I think it is Natalie?" Amy asks with a little excitement on her face.

"I found a bottle Jägermeister that Reese got for a birthday gift but never opened. In honor of Carol reminding me of how immature I can be I say we play a game of never have I ever. Rules are if you did it you have to take a drink, if no one else did it either the speaker has to take a drink."

"You sure that's a good idea Natalie?" Glenn asks looking towards the others worriedly.

"Don't worry about them. We'll stop once one person gets to four if you're that worried. Besides I want to drink some of this before anyone else finds out I have it and confiscates it." They both agree and I have Glenn start us off.

"Okay, never have I ever… cheated on a homework assignment." Me and Amy just let out some laughs as we both took a drink.

"Really Glenn? That's the best you can come up with? You know the internet is just begging to be used for that one assignment you procrastinated to long about." I say as Amy nods in agreement with me.

"My turn" Amy said as she grabbed the bottle. "Never have I ever done something that was considered illegal."

"Wait what do you mean considered?" I asked. "Does that include things that aren't that looked down upon like smoke weed or download free music from questionable sites?"

"Some people do think that's bad, and fine those don't count. I guess things like assault or damaging public property." I take a drink and I'm surprised to see Glenn reach out for the bottle.

"Wait what! What did you do Glenn?" I ask as he takes a sip.

"God that burns! Don't know how some people keep a straight face." He says

"Glenn what did you do?" Amy asks

"I know how to hot wire cars. Not something I usually go bragging about." He says and me and Amy's jaws drop.

"Damn Glenn!" I say. "All I did was key some douche's car for cheating on a friend. You're into some grand theft auto shit!"

"Can we not make a big deal out of it? I'm not exactly that proud of it, I needed the money."

"No one's judging here Glenn. Although now I want you to hot wire a sports car and bring it back to camp." I say with a smile.

"God I wish I could. Deal! If I ever get the chance I'm going for it!" he says.

It's now my turn and I'm trying to think of something I've never done. I have a feeling I've done more things than them but after hearing Glenn's confession who knows what else they've done in their past.

"Never have I ever… god why is it so hard to think of something?" I say while I face palm myself. "Okay I got it. Never have I ever hooked up with someone of the same sex." I say. Glenn shakes his head no but Amy looks like she's in deep thought.

"… Define hooked up?" she said.

"Amy you little vixen!" I tease her as I see Glenn get more interested in the game (of course it was this part he was into). "I mean did anything that can be classified as sex. I don't count kissing as hooking up or anything bad and I don't judge whatever anyone is into… so long as it's not bestiality."

"Ew Natalie! And no, now that you clarified it I didn't hook up with the same gender. It was just one kiss and nothing else." She said.

"Dammit! I shouldn't have said that." I say as I take a swig of the drink. So far I've had three sips while Amy and Glenn just had one. At this rate I was going to lose. "Back to you Glenn."

"Okay never have I ever learned to play a piano."

"… I never played a piano."

"Me neither." Amy and I said.

"Dammit!" He said and took a drink.

"Glenn why would you pick something so random?" Amy asked.

"I don't know. I thought a lot girls went through the I want to play the piano phase." He said.

"I didn't know such a phase existed." I said and we all laughed at that. Amy stopped and got our attention back to the game.

"Okay, never have I ever had a messy break-up." She said. It got awkwardly quiet as Glenn shook his head no and I reluctantly grabbed the bottle and took a long drink.

"That bad Natalie?" Amy asked.

"It was pretty messy. Yelling, something broke, and I stopped talking to him all together after that."

"Must have been pretty bad." Glenn said.

"Actually before all that it wasn't and it probably didn't have to be that bad if we could just function normally. He thought he could fix me but I didn't think that I needed to be fixed."

"Why would he think you were broken?" Glenn asked. I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair.

"I didn't live a perfect life. I didn't have a white house with a picket fence, I had parents who tried hard to provide but their lives ended too quickly and I was left to drift between homes. When Eli, my boyfriend, found out he didn't take it well. He freaked out, basically called me damaged goods and told me he'd try to fix me."

"What a douche." Amy said. "How could he do that?"

"Yeah he was a douche and to answer your question it's pretty easy to judge someone. We're taught to label and judge people ever since we were kids that it's become harder not to judge someone. We can try to not be judgmental and maybe even convince ourselves we aren't but it's always still there. We just need to make sure we have a good reason to have those thoughts, like it's your gut telling you not to trust someone." I see that they're both in deep thought over what I just said. Crap this was not what I wanted to happen tonight.

"Okay I'm over it, we were supposed to have fun not mope and get all sentimental!" I say changing the subject.

"True, sorry about that." Amy apologizes.

"Well don't be too hard on yourself." Glenn says, "It's kind of hard to be positive all time."

"Amy usually is for the most part." I say. "I just brought it down, but now I'm going to bring it back up by listing all the stuff I don't miss in life. For example, I do not miss the sound of the my neighbors having sex through the paper-thin walls." That got a couple groans of disgust and shivers out of the two and we all laughed.

"Okay my turn." Glenn said "I do not miss getting stuck in traffic during a delivery and having the pizza be free."

"What? I thought you were speedy Glenn?" I said.

"That only happened when I couldn't take my shortcuts." He countered.

"My turn!" Amy said. "I do not miss turning in homework and keeping up with my appearance." That was technically two but I'll let her have it.

"I don't miss debt and student loans." I say as I take a drink.

"Here here!" Glenn said as he asked for the bottle taking a longer sip than he usually took. I guess that's why he was a pizza boy.

"Same!" Amy said as she asked for the bottle. Well it looks we all have one thing in common, we all hate debt.

"Okay that's enough for tonight. I think if we keep this up they're going to get suspicious." I put the cork back in the bottle and stuff it in my bag.

"Yeah I'm getting tired." Amy said.

"Night." Glenn said.

"Goodnight. I'll put the fire out since I'm not that tired." With that they both went back to their tents as I put out the fire.

* * *

I empty a bucket of water on the fire and it goes out with a quick hiss before it's all quiet. In fact it's really quiet. I look around and see that the other camp fire is out and that everyone is probably in their tents sleeping now. I take this moment to appreciate the quiet and lay on the ground looking at the stars. Sure it's not the safest thing to do but I haven't been able to look that the stars since the first night we got here and I only had a sleeping bag to sleep in. I make a face thinking about how awful the mosquito bites were but since then I've grown used to them and luckily haven't had that many more bites. Maybe they think my blood is tainted or something. I roll my eyes at the thought.

_Snap! _I hear a twig break and whip my head around in the direction of the noise. I see someone lurking in the shadows, a man's silhouette that is trying to get away.

"Hey! I know your there! Come out before you do anything stupid." I say firmly. The figure swears in a deep voice that has a twang to it before he steps out into the moonlight. I relax a little as I see it's Daryl. "Well long time no see Dixon. Felt like you were avoiding me for a while." And it seemed like he still was since I caught him trying to run away.

"Been out hunting Falco. Getting close to bagging that deer." He said from his spot.

"Well come over here. Pop a squat and tell me all about it." He gave me a bewildered look at my lax behavior but came forward a bit. He was staring at me for some reason.

"You drunk Falco?" he asked.

"Nope." I say emphasizing the P. Something I picked up from him. "Might be a little tipsy though. Shared a drink with Glenn and Amy."

"Did he get drunk off his ass?" he asked with interest as he sat down next to me, not too close though.

"No he probably only had two or three sips of Jäger. But I can tell that if he had anymore he'd probably be out of it."

"Seems like a lightweight. And where the hell did ya find Jäger?" he asked.

"If I tell you that somehow Merle is going to find out and steal it. And no you can't have some, I'm saving it for special occasion."

"Greedy bitch." He mumbled which caused me to laugh. "What are you doing out here anyway?" he asked.

"I was putting out the fire but I didn't feel tired. So I thought I'd appreciate the quiet and look at the stars. Right now I'm trying to find Polaris."

"Tryin to find who?" he asks with a confused expression. I laugh a little remembering who I'm talking to.

"Sorry, I had a flashback to an astrology lecture. Polaris is also known the North Star. The brightest one in the little…"

"Right there." He points at the sky towards the brightest star in the sky.

"…dipper. How'd you know that?"

"I'm not a total idiot Falco. I've used that star plenty of times when I got off track hunting."

"I have never thought you were an idiot. There are all sorts of smarts than just book smart, you're more survivalist smart." It got quiet at that. Why is it anytime I say something that's nice and has no hint of sarcasm around him it gets awkward? It's not like it's totally out of character for me to be nice, ask any of the others besides Shane, Ed and possibly Merle on a bad day and they'd all say I was a decent person. Maybe it was just our relationship or lack of one. We always seem to take one step forward to becoming friends but then two steps back.

"Thanks I guess." He finally says.

"You're welcome. Now tell me about this elusive deer."

And then the awkwardness was gone. He started going into how he was tracking it and tactics for how he was going to finally get it. I see that seriousness in his eyes as he talks about it and can't help but admire his passion. It must be nice to still be able to do something you love when everything else goes to shit. It made me miss taking pictures but I didn't have the heart to use my camera, I'd be afraid of drawing unwanted attention with the flash and the shutter (I still like to use retro cameras). But I put that aside and listen to Daryl talk, sometimes I add suggestions or make snide remarks about how smart the deer must be to allude Daryl the greatest hunter in Georgia (he'd just glare at me if I said the last part). It felt like we talked for hours before I started to get tired.

"It's late, you should get to your tent." He said as I was fighting closing my eyes.

"Yeah probably a good idea." I say. I try to get up but I'm a little slow, next thing I know he offers his hand out and I take it so he can help me up. We lock eyes for a minute and see that he's not on edge like usual. He actually seems calm for once.

"Hey two things." I say. "First one, you don't have to keep calling me Falco. You can call me Natalie or even Nat if you want. Second, if you need a hunting partner I don't mind. Last time I checked we did pretty good bagging that boar." I recalled the first time he trained me, that feels so long ago for some reason.

"Last I checked I'm the one that shot it between the eyes."

"But I'm the one that pointed it out."

"You distracted me." He reminded me of when we had that scuffle and I managed to flip him on his back (something I'm still surprised I did and I'm proud of).

"Careful, if you admit I distracted you Dixon you might lose your title of master hunter." I say and stick out my tongue (okay maybe I'm just a little more than buzzed.)

"Go to bed." He said as he shoved my bag into my arms.

"Fine, night Dixon." I say as I walk away. I'm not sure if I was hallucinating or not but I could have sworn I heard him say

"Goodnight Natalie."

* * *

**End! So this chapter was mostly filler. Pretty soon I'll be writing from season one and I found a good website with the scripts! Right now I'm just trying to establish most of the relationships Natalie will have with other members of the group. Hoped you liked it even though it didn't have any action in it, and as always feel free to favorite, follow and leave comments. **

**P.S. I do not condone getting drunk (i didn't even make her really drunk just tipsy), hot wiring cars, damaging someone else's property or cheating. (Although I would admit that the internet did help me get through some hard classes but I NEVER PLAGERIZED, just did some research when I was only supposed to use a text book.)**


	12. Revelation

**Thank you to all who continue to read, favorite, follow and review this story! I felt so happy to see that this story has over 20 favorites and over 30 followers. Seriously I didn't have any idea of how this would do when I started and I feel so much love towards all of you who enjoy this. It means so much to me and gives me confidence to keep doing this no matter how bad my inner critic gets, how bad my writers block is or how busy my day has been. I also love writing this story and going on this adventure with my OC. Okay done getting in touch with my emotional side! Now I'm replying to comments.**

**lunerusso: Welcome to the story! I'm glad you love it so far and I hope you continue to love it :D **

**Disclaimer: Don't own Walking Dead... nothing more to say.**

**Warning: Rated T for language, sensitive themes, violence and drama. **

_Italics mean flash back_

**_Bold Italics:_**_ Sound_

'thoughts'

* * *

**Chapter 12**

Daryl's POV

_He couldn't sleep. He could never fully fall asleep, for almost as long as he can remember he never got a good night's sleep. There was always a reason for him to stay awake. Whether it was Merle's loud snoring, his father coming home drunk and looking for a human punching bag, or to be ready for a fight against a geek. The closest he ever got was getting so drunk he would black out for the night but that always came with a horrible headache in the morning. So he was doing what he usually did at night, walking around checking the area to make sure it was clear. However when he walked further up the hill he noticed something different. There was a small fire that was put out a while ago, and someone laying on the ground right beside it. From where Daryl was standing in the woods he saw it was someone with dark hair lying with their hands across the stomach staring up at the sky. _

'_Who's stupid enough to fall asleep out in the open?' he thought as he stepped closer to get a good view of who it was. _

_So far they looked like a woman with long dark hair, that narrowed it down to Lori, Miranda, the other girl whose name he can't remember and Natalie. He was really hoping it was anyone but the latter, Natalie was probably mad at him for avoiding her. But fate was not on his side as he stepped on a branch that made a loud noise. The figure sat up real fast and turned their head around so Daryl could see that it was Natalie. _

'_Shit!' he thought to himself 'she must have been awake this whole time!'_

"_Hey! I know you're there! Come out before you do anything stupid." she yelled towards where he was. _

'_Just as gusty as ever. Doesn't even have a weapon yet she's making threats.' He decided that it was too late to get away. She might run after him and attack him. He grunted a swear as he walked towards her; once he was out of the words he saw her posture relax a bit and the glare on her face disappeared. He wanted to snap at her about letting her guard down, but she didn't know she shouldn't trust him. _

"_Well long time no see Dixon. Felt like you were avoiding me for a while." So he was right about her noticing he was avoiding her he thought to himself. _

"_Been out hunting Falco. Getting close to bagging that deer." Which wasn't a lie. She surprised him though by putting on a sly smile and patting the dirt beside her._

"_Well come over here. Pop a squat and tell me all about it." She leaned back resting on her elbows as she looked at him._

'_What the hell, pop a squat?' those were the last words he thought would come out of her mouth. He started to get closer to her and fully take in her appearance. Her cheeks were a little flushed and her eyes looked slightly hazy with a bit of playfulness. _

"_You drunk Falco?" he asked already knowing the answer. He'd seen many drunken people and all different types of drunks. Even though she wasn't passed out in her own puddle of vomit she still had enough to get her a little giddy._

"_Nope. Might be a little tipsy though. Shared a drink with Glenn and Amy." This caught his interest. Against his better judgment he sat down next to her to talk. 'Hell' he thought, 'she might be a lightweight and not remember this tomorrow'. _

"_Did he get drunk off his ass." The thought of seeing the awkward young man drunk was entertaining for Daryl. He used to enjoy watching young lightweights make fools of themselves by drinking way more than they can handle. _

"_No he probably only had two or three sips of Jäger. But I can tell that if he had anymore he'd probably be out of it."_

"_Seems like a lightweight. And where the hell did ya find Jäger?" he asked. 'And why have you been holding out on me?' was what he was really thinking._

"_If I tell you that somehow Merle is going to find out and steal it. And no you can't have some; I'm saving it for special occasion." She said the last part answering his question._

"_Greedy bitch." He mumbled. She laughed at that, for some reason Natalie still found reasons to laugh when there doesn't seem like any reason too. He guessed it was either a force of habit for when she didn't know what else to say or that it was the booze making her laugh. Either way it was a laugh he was starting to get used to._

"_What are you doing out here anyway?" he asked trying to get back on topic. _

"_I was putting out the fire but I didn't feel tired. So I thought I'd appreciate the quiet and look at the stars. Right now I'm trying to find Polaris."_

"_Trying to find who?" he asked wondering what the hell she was babbling about. When she laughed again he started to feel frustrated. Like it was something obvious and he was too stupid to figure it out. _

"_Sorry, I had a flashback to an astrology lecture. Polaris is also known the North Star. The brightest one in the little…"_

"_Right there." He interrupted her and pointed at the sky towards the brightest star in the sky. He guessed that she used some fancy science name for it but he knew the North Star when he saw it. It was his compass at night when he was a boy wandering alone through the woods trying to get home. He forgot whether it was his mother or someone else that told him about it but he always remembered it._

"…_dipper." She finished what she was saying. "How'd you know that?"_

"_I'm not a total idiot Falco. I've used that star plenty of times when I got off track hunting." He defended himself, ready for her to make smart-ass comeback. Maybe this time it'd be something like how she was more educated than him._

"_I have never thought you were an idiot. There are all sorts of smarts than just book smart, you're more survivalist smart." He looked over at her and saw that she was serious. No jabs or sarcasm in her voice, complete honesty. He didn't speak out of shock. All of his life he so was used to being called stupid, trash, trouble, and scum that he didn't know how to respond to a compliment. In fact Natalie was one of the few people who he can recall giving him a compliment and treated him like she would anyone else, fairly unless you crossed her. _

'_Why does she have to be this way?' he thought to himself feeling uncomfortable. Apparently she felt that way too because she hasn't spoken either. 'What do you do in this situation? Just say something and get the hell out of here!'_

"_Thanks I guess." Not what he thought he would say but it felt right. It also felt weird for him but seeing her face lighten up made it feel less weird._

""_You're welcome. Now tell me about this elusive deer." _

_ He didn't know what came over him but he started telling her about his time in the woods. The tracks he saw, the tactics he used and how there may be a big herd of them roaming in the deeper part of the words. She looked at him with fascination in her eyes, never dozing off from what he was saying. As he continued talking he couldn't help but notice that it felt like the world disappeared, that all their problems were gone and they were just two people having a conversation. He hated to admit it but it felt good to have someone to talk to, someone who wasn't judging him about his enthusiasm for hunting and was actually listening to him. _

"_I was close though. The marks that were there were probably only ten minutes old. Son of'a bitch has got away too many times." _

"_Wow this deer must be a genius if he can elude Daryl Dixon. Master archer, tracker and greatest in all of Georgia." Oddly enough there were no comebacks from Daryl. Just a glare. Probably because she found a way to both insult and compliment him in one sentence. _

"_How have you been tracking him? Just following his tracks or have you been noticing which areas the dear frequents most? If you can pinpoint where he goes the most you can stake out those areas waiting for him to come by." She suggested. It wasn't a bad idea, he thought of it himself but wasn't sure if it was worth the time or not._

"_Not a bad idea. I might miss out on other game and it could take a while but it might work." As he said this he saw her eyes flutter. She was trying to stay awake and was obviously failing._

""_It's late; you should get to your tent." He said as I was fighting closing my eyes._

"_Yeah probably a good idea." She says trying to get up. She's a little slow getting out of her reclined position and wobbles a little as she tries to stand. Daryl rolls his eyes and holds his hand out for her to take. She doesn't fight him this time as she takes his hand and he pulls her up fast. A little too fast as she wobbles for a second before looking up in his eyes. They were still slightly cloudy but it didn't take away from the deep brown color. Looking into them didn't unnerve him though this time. She didn't try to read into him too much and if she did she didn't ask him about it. _

"_Hey two things." she says breaking him out of his trance. "First one, you don't have to keep calling me Falco. You can call me Natalie or even Nat if you want." Crap! He hoped it was the alcohol talking because he hated the thought of her trusting him. 'Dixons can't be trusted; we just destroy anything we come in contact with' he thought to himself. "Second, if you need a hunting partner I don't mind. Last time I checked we did pretty good bagging that boar." _

"_Last I checked I'm the one that shot it between the eyes." _

"_But I'm the one that pointed it out."_

"_You distracted me." He remembered being so pissed at her for killing a geek that he pinned her to the ground. But that anger turned into shock and panic when she managed to flip him over and talked very suggestively to him. Most men in that situation would probably have liked it or take advantage of it but Daryl was not like most men. He freaked out and threw her on the ground like she had cooties. _

"_Careful, if you admit I distracted you Dixon you might lose your title of master hunter." she said and stick out her tongue. _

'_Real mature Falco. Almost forgot you're a decade younger than me.' He thought to himself._

"_Go to bed." He said as he picked up her bag and shoved it into her arms. _

"_Fine, night Dixon." She says as she walks away. _

"_Goodnight Natalie." He says when he thinks she's a good enough distance away. _

_ When she's in her tent he runs his hand through his hair and sighs. 'Why does she have to make this so difficult?' he thought. Why did she have to give him and Merle a chance when it felt like they ran out of them? He walks toward his own tent ready to pass out. That night was one of the soundest he's slept for a while._

* * *

**One month later**

He thought that avoiding her would be easy. He'd spent most of his life trying to avoid people, but it turned out to be harder than he thought. The camp was smaller than he thought and after that night he realized that he didn't even want to avoid her. She was the only person from the camp who treated him like a human being and not some dog they order around to go hunting. That only made it more complicated for him when Merle kept talking about moving his plans to rob and leave the camp. So far he managed to convince him to wait this long but he's starting to feel like he's running out of time to stall him and pretty soon he's going to have to choose who he's siding with. He already knew who he would pick too, Merle was blood. Blood was thicker than water.

As he was checking his crossbow for another hunting trip he looked up and saw Natalie run over to talk to Glenn before he went out on a solo run.

"Yo D! Come over here for a minute!" Merle called out to Daryl. He grunted as he got up and went to see what Merle was up to.

* * *

Natalie's POV

I was watching the kids when I saw Glenn talking to Lori and Shane. For the past month Glenn has done solo runs into the city for the group much to my discomfort. I hated that ever since he got here people have given him the shitty jobs but he would always tell me not to worry about it and he was glad to contribute. As he was leaving I asked Amy to take over for me.

"Glenn wait up!" I call out to him. He turns around and sees me running towards him.

"No Natalie."

"I didn't even get to say anything."

"I know what you want to say. You want to come with me and tell me that I don't need to keep doing this alone."

"I didn't bring you to this camp just to be a pack mule Glenn. It's not fair that it's mostly you risking your life going out there."

"I know the city. I can get in and out without any problems. Plus I don't feel comfortable with the idea of bringing other people."

"Glenn come on, it's just me. You know I'm capable of handling myself and helping you." I argued. Besides I feel like I'm getting a little out of practice with my fighting skills, target practice can only do so much.

"You know I'm not comfortable with other people coming no matter how good they are and I can get everything we need so just tell me what you need."

"It's not just that Glenn. You know that Reese is still out there and I need to check our rendezvous places to see if she left any notes or is actually there." Glenn's face softened at that. I've gone a little stir crazy for the past week wanting to go find my sister. Everyone seemed to notice because I've been given a lot more chores lately like laundry, watching the kids, keeping watch and I even tried fishing (that went horribly, I flipped the boat over trying to untangle my rod) but none of it was working. I wanted to go into the city, kill some geeks and search every place I could to find my sister.

"I know that. It's just… look, how about I go alone this time and when I get back we can make plans about going into other parts of the city. We'd both would probably feel better with a plan anyways."

"Yeah okay. I can agree to that, take my car this time. Jim just looked it over and said everything's good." I say leading him towards my car. As I pull the car keys out of my pocket to hand it to him I see him look at it skeptically.

"Oh don't give me that look. Sure it's a piece of crap but it's my piece of crap and I expect it back in one piece." I lectured him. He laughed at that.

"Okay I'll take good care of it. Is there anything you need?" he asked. I look around to see if anyone is nearby and whisper it to him.

"I'm kind of running low on stuff. I could use another pack of birth control… hey don't give me that look. If you had to deal with cramping and mood swings every month for at least a week you'd do something about it." I say as his face turns uncomfortable and disgusted, why do men always freak out about periods?

"Right sorry, just getting used to women asking for tampons and other stuff like that."

"Okay and the other thing I need… it's more personal."

"Natalie how can anything else be more personal than that?" he asked. I just motion for him to come forward so I can whisper it to him. He looks at me with wide eyes.

"How are you doing now?"

"I'm fine. I have a couple left from my last prescription to get by, but if I don't get a refill I'm going to go through some bad withdraws and I'll be a burden on everyone else." I say. I hate that I have to ask Glenn to do this but having to swallow my pride is my only option now.

"Okay I'll see what I can do. But I have to warn you that some people may have cleared out the pharmacy."

"And if that happens I'll deal with it, but thank you Glenn. If you ever need anything please let me know." I say as I hug him. He's stiff at first but hugs me back. After a couple seconds we break apart and I hand him the keys. I watch him drive off before turning around to go back to watching the kids.

I must have talked to him for longer than I thought because now they were all down by the lake having a good time and Morales was trying to help the boys' fish. They look like they're all good so I guess I don't need to help. But what was it that I could do?... I think Daryl was going to go hunting today so maybe I could help him with that. I look over to where I saw him earlier but he disappeared. Maybe he's in his tent now getting ready to go. I walk over and see that there are two figures in the tent. I'm about to call out to them when I hear their conversation.

"It's gotta be tonight D. I'm getting sick of being around these dumb fuckers. We should have done it long ago." I hear Merle say. What's he talking about?

"You've said that a million times already. The pills and coke are just messing with your head."

"Hey if I had it my way we would have been long gone by now but you keep putting me off with the wait till they get more stuff or I'm close to catching that deer. Well fuck that deer! I say we rob the place like I wanted to the night we joined this camp."

* * *

I feel like I just got punched in the stomach when I heard that. I can't breathe… can't speak… can't even control my own body. Before I knew it I ran away from that tent and into the woods. I kept running without any purpose just wanting to get away from them. So much anger was flowing through me. I should have known. How could I have been so fucking stupid! How could I let them in and trust them! I stopped where I was and just covered my face in my hands.

"Aghhh" I let out a muffled scream. My eyes sting and I collapse to the ground silently sobbing. They saved me. I vouched for them. I teased them, drank with and bonded with them. How could they betray me this way? Especially Daryl. I thought he was different from Merle but he's just been waiting for the right moment to pull the rug out from under us.

"Not so tough now are you?" I hear someone say behind me. I look up to see Ed staring me down, what the hell was he doing here?

"Fuck off Ed. I'm not in the mood." I say back as I get up.

"Don't care. I wanna talk to you and since you're not being protected by anyone I can finally say it." He says and he grabs me by my forearm. "I want you to stay away from my wife and daughter. They don't need scum like you clinging to them." His grip around my arm hurts but I didn't care. At that moment I was livid and I couldn't control what came out of my mouth.

"Is that it Ed? Is that really how you feel? Or is it that you're afraid I'm going to take them away from you. Sophia loves me and Carol is like the mother I wish I had, and if you keep hurting them I swear to God I won't hesitate ending your sorry excuse of a life."

"You fucking bitch!" He punches me. Pain is shooting through my entire head but I just laugh.

"Is that all you got. I thought you would be a lot stronger from using Carol as a punching bag but I guess you really are a special kind of pussy if you only fight defenseless women and little girls." He aims another punch at me but I move my head and grab his fist. "But the thing is I'm not defenseless." I knee him in the groin and twist his arm behind his back as he falls over in pain.

"I've had a really shitty day so far so if I were you I would go back to camp and pretend this never happened. Otherwise I will tell everyone what you do even if it does mean I lose Carol and Sophia, because I would love to see you get beaten up, thrown out or even killed for all the pain you put those two through." I say letting him go and stepping away from him. He looks up at me like a wild animal and tries to lunge at me again.

_**Thwack!**_

Ed grabs his face in pain as an arrow grazes his cheek and impaled itself in the tree behind him. Blood is oozing out from between his fingers as he lets out curses and painful cries. I already know who is responsible before I heard the familiar twangy accent speak behind me.

"Get your ass outta here Ed! Do anything stupid and I'll do more than just give you a scratch." He said. Ed was still glaring at me but he slowly rose to his feet and started walking towards the camp. He moves his hand away and I see a long cut going across his cheek and towards his ear. Once he's gone I hear footsteps come towards me but I refuse to turn around.

"Did that fucker do anything to you? Cuz if he did I swear…" he reaches his hand out to touch my shoulder but I move away.

"Don't touch me!" I shout at him. I turn around so I'm face to face with him and he sees the mark on my face from where Ed punched me.

"He's dead! I'm going to go kill his ass!" he shouted.

"Oh this? This is nothing! I had it all under control until you came along."

"What the hell are you yelling at me for?"

"I heard you! I fucking heard you and Merle in your tent. How could you? We took you in and you repay us by robbing us!" I shout at him. He has a look of surprise on his face and he says nothing.

"What? Not going to defend yourself? Say it was all a misunderstanding or some bullshit?" He won't look me in the eyes.

"Dammit answer me!" I shout at him.

"What do you want me to say?" he shouts back. "I can't say it's not true because it is true. From the beginning Merle wanted to rob the place but I kept trying to talk him out of it. He won't listen though god damn shit head, so I've tried to put it off as long as possible!"

"So that's it? It's all Merle's idea and you're just a goddamn lost puppy that follows him everywhere?" I shout.

"Shut up! He's my older brother, my blood. I can't abandon him." I see how lost he looks when he says that. I know that look, I've felt it so many times with my sister. No matter how bad it got I wanted to stay by her side but sometimes she was more toxic than helpful.

"Sometimes they give you no choice!" I say.

"What are you talking about?" He asks.

"When I was eighteen Reese hit rock bottom. It was the summer before my first semester at college when she came to me for help. Her current boyfriend got her into some messed up shit. He was in a gang and got her to help him sell drugs and commit other crimes. One day she comes to the foster home I'm staying at, she's wearing shitty clothes she got from good will and has bags under her eyes. She says she needs my help. That there's this job that him and his friends need help with. All we had to do was sneak in through the window and let them in. She said it like it was no big deal, that breaking and entering was something normal. I've tried to talk her into leaving him and getting help before but she wouldn't listen. Said I didn't understand love and that she had no other options." I stop ranting to take a deep breath. He doesn't interrupt and tell me to get to the point. He just waits hanging onto my every word.

"I felt sick when she said that. I knew I couldn't take it anymore so I gave her an ultimatum. I told her that I wanted no part in what she was doing. That if she wanted to keep me in her life she needed to get her shit together, I would never speak to her again if she went through with it. I kicked her out of the house then, shut the door in her face and wouldn't open it no matter how hard she knocked on the door begging me to let her in. When she left I didn't see her for a week and it felt like the longest most agonizing week of my life; but I didn't know pain until the news came on one night. It spoke about a break-in gone wrong. That house she wanted my help with belonged to a rival gang of her boyfriend. It was where cooked their meth or whatever shitty drug they sold. They were in the house and a gun fight broke out. Six people were shot and three of them were dead, her boyfriend was one of them. My heart broke thinking she was there, I kept calling her but she wouldn't pick up. Then there's a knock at the door and I open it up to see her there, crying but alive. She hugs me tight apologizing a dozen times; telling me that she couldn't go through with it. She didn't want to lose me like we lost everyone else in our family; she needed me to guide her even though she was supposed to guide me." I wipe a lone tear that's running down my face as I recall the memory. I hated doing that to her but in the end she always said it was the best thing I could have done. She had to leave New York that day because of all the problems she created but it made her stronger to cut ties with all the drama and start over. Not the strongest person in the world but stronger and happier than she was there. Daryl was still silently taking in my story. It was the most I've revealed about myself to him and it was a lot to take in but once he did he understood what I was trying to say to him.

"So you want me to do that to Merle? Threaten him? He's not like your sister! He won't back down! And are you going to tell the others about us if I don't?" he asked.

"You're doubting how much you mean to him Daryl. And no I'm not going to tell the others right now. I'm giving you a chance to prove you really don't want to do this. That you're a decent person who won't hurt the one person in this camp that gave you and you're brother a chance when no one else would or anyone else for that matter. I may be mad now and I'm going to be mad for a while but I still believe that there's something in you that wants to do the right thing. The same something that keeps saving me, please don't make me look stupid by proving me wrong." I say and I walk away. I left him alone with those words.

* * *

**DUN! DUN! DUN! DRAMA! haha but on a serious note I'm warning you that this isn't over. More drama will be coming. This relationship that Natalie and Daryl have will not be an easy one. There is going to be bumps in the road and it will get complicated but I assure you that there will be good moments, heartfelt moments, and hopefully some hot/passionate moments (that will definitely be new territory for me) but it will take some time to get there.**

**Stay tuned to see how this all turns out and how Natalie's advice will affect Daryl. **


	13. Confrontation

**Disclaimer: i do not own the walking dead**

* * *

**Chapter 13**

Three days later

"So I was thinking that we could go more into the city through these alley ways, it would take longer than using the main roads but we should hopefully run into fewer geeks. We can scout out the big department store to see what's left and use the roof to see the rest of the city… Natalie are you listening to me?" Glenn asked when he saw me starting to drift off. I tilt my head up from the map we were looking at to see he was looking at me concerned.

"Yeah I am. We're going to go to the department store and see which roads we can use from the roof."

"Close enough but are you ok? You haven't been yourself for a while. Is the stuff I got you not working? Because I couldn't find exactly what you were looking for but I think I got you something similar." He said.

"No it's not that Glenn. The pills you got me work fine. I've just had a little too much on my mind lately and it's taking a toll on me."

"Do you wanna talk about it?" he asks.

Do I want to talk about how days ago I found out that someone who I thought of as mentor and was starting to trust was really just going to stab me in the back? That the Dixon brothers were going to rob us in the middle of the night and leave us for dead? No, I brought them here and I feel it's my fault for bringing them here and convincing everyone that they were decent people besides being rude and assholes from time to time. Sure they are still here but Daryl and I have avoided each other for the past few days and who's to say he won't end up doing it when I least expect it? I should probably tell but a part of me still wanted to give him a chance.

"Just thinking of my sister like usual." I lied.

"How do you do it?" He asks. "How do you still have hope? I haven't seen my family for a long time either but I just can't imagine seeing them again after all of this?"

"I think I'm kind of running on hope Glenn. That I need it in order to keep going. I'm not sure how I'll be once I find her alive or dead but just the idea of fighting for her and the chance of seeing her again is enough to get me through the day without wanting me to end it all before I'm bitten and become one of them."

"I never took you as someone who would think of suicide." He said with concern in his eyes.

"I'm not! Not usually anyway, but if I were to die I want it to be on my own terms. I'm either going down with a fight or ending it if I get bitten."

"That sounds more like you. Now let's get back to planning our run." He says and we look at the map again. I'm starting to feel more comfortable with the plan. We've planned plenty of emergency exit strategies (most that would only fit one or two people) and have a good idea of which areas to avoid and even Glenn seemed more comfortable with me going than he had been days ago. All was going well until we got interrupted.

"Hey have you guys… what are you doing?" Lori came over and interrupted us. She seemed to have forgotten what she was about to say as she looked over our map. "Don't tell me you guys are going down there together. It's too dangerous!" she said. Wait, how was it not so dangerous when it was just Glenn but if it's both of us it's a death sentence?

"No more so than when Glenn goes alone. Besides we've planned out good strategies if anything does go wrong and we are avoiding the places that draw the most people." I argued.

"I don't care. Atlanta is too dangerous for the two of you to go alone! You proved that last time you went Natalie. That's why we left a sign to warn people not to go into the city and why we are starting to get more people here." She argued, drawing the attention of the other people (I lost count of how many after 20. I just know the names of the original group, Jim and Glenn.) Shane being one of them sadly.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"They want to go to Atlanta by themselves." Lori said. Damn why did we have to get more people involved?

"Why would you wanna do that? You just went there a couple of days ago and we're fine." Shane asked.

"We want to go into deeper parts of the city and see what we can find." Glenn explained. "Natalie still has her sister out there and she's been wanting to go for days."

"It's a death trap. Anyone who goes into that city is probably dead or dying right now." Shane said. "If you two are going don't expect my approval." God what an asshole! He basically said my sister was good as dead.

"Well what if they don't go alone." Andrea interrupted. "I'll go with them." What? Did she forget what I told her about getting her shit together. She has not had any practice with her gun since she got back!

"I'll go too." T-Dog volunteered.

"So will I." Morales interrupted. God what was this the Hunger Games? We didn't need people to volunteer.

"I'll go if you have me." Jacqui spoke up. She hasn't been on a run in a long time.

"It's not necessary; Glenn and I have a plan. Besides I practically had to beg Glenn to let me go with him, he doesn't like bringing a lot of people." I argue back.

"But wouldn't it make more sense to have more people in a group to have each other's back?" Andrea tried to argue back. "There's safety in numbers than just going alone or only having one other person."

Now everyone was trying to get their opinion in on the conversation. I couldn't even make out anything anyone was saying because it was all jumbled up together. I looked over at Glenn who shrugged his shoulders in a "what can I do to help" kind of way. Oh why did this have to have to get out of hand? It was supposed to be a simple mission and now everyone wants to get involved. Why did Lori even come over here? She wanted to ask something. Before I could ask her though someone's voice became louder than anyone elses.

"Everyone shut up! You're giving me a headache!" Merle shouted from his beside his tent where him and his brother were sitting and whipped out his gun. All of the guys who carried guns got theirs out and pointed it at Merle while the women let out some screams.

"Merle put it down!" Shane shouted. "Don't make me shoot you."

"Really? Pretty boy cop got the balls to shoot me? Thought you were all talk no action." He taunted.

"Drop the weapon!" he shouted.

"I wasn't going to hurt anyone. I was gonna fire a round in the air to get y'all ta shut up." He said.

"How does that help with your headache?" I deadpanned.

"Well well what do you know? You're speaking to me. Thought you forgot bout ol' Merle since China man showed up. You two have been getting real cozy lately. Why you itching to go to Atlanta so badly? No place to screw around here?" he said.

"Fuck off Merle!" I shouted back at him. I shouldn't have gotten involved, I'm really tempted to rat him out to everyone right now.

"Hey you two watch your mouths!" Shane shouted.

"There are children here!" Lori gestures to the kids. Something's off though, I can't put my finger on it though.

"Besides why would Natalie want to hang out with you Merle?" Andrea piped out. "I highly doubt a young woman would choose to hang out with two angry rednecks than someone her own age."

"Hey easy what you say there bitch! Me and my brother have been helping out since we got here and we don't have to do it anymore. We can go when we want." He shouted back.

"Then why don't you?" Ed shouted. "You've been pissing off more people than helping anyway."

"Whatch you say? What the hell have you been doing? Nothing but overseeing that the women don't get out of line. Don't think I don't notice you get off over sitting on your ass watching them." I'm surprised Merle was this observant about Ed. I'm also surprised we share a common hatred for Ed. Those two were glaring daggers at one another and I was sure that the ground would rip open and the flames of hell would leap out of it. Okay maybe too over dramatic but it's a dramatic moment.

"You two stop it!" Shane yelled. "Nothing's getting solved and you're making the kids feel worse!" I look over at the kids to see he was right.

Sophia looked close to tears as she held on to her mother. Eliza and Louis where staying as far away from the group as possible. And Carl was…

…

…

Wait a minute. I don't see Carl anywhere!

"Where's Carl?" I ask. That got everyone's attention. Everyone started looking around but there was no sign of the boy. "Lori where is he?" I ask again. She had a look of panic in her eyes and realization.

"I thought he was nearby. That's why I came over to you and Glenn, to see if you saw him."

"And you got involved in what we were doing instead of asking where your kid is. Wow mother of the year award goes to you!" I shout at her sarcastically. She looks at me with her eyes resembling a bull about to charge.

"Enough!" Shane shouts. "Right now we go look for Carl. This is over. No one goes to Atlanta today and tomorrow no more than six people can go to Atlanta if they want to!" he shouts and we start to disperse.

"Guess our plans are useless now." Glenn says to me.

"We'll talk later. Gotta go find Carl." I say as I go off to find said missing boy.

* * *

"Carl! Carl can you hear me?" I shout as I walk through the woods.

How can one kid wander so far away and have no one notice he was gone? It feels like these woods are endless as I walk through them. All I see are lots of trees passing me by and hear the sound of leaves crunching under my worn out boots. I swear I've gone around in circles because I keep seeing this one tree with dead branches on the left side of it and a squirrel's nest in it. It almost looks like it's taunting me the way it's looking at me with its beady eyes and watching me stumble through the woods.

"God why is it so hot today?" I say aloud to myself. Sweat is rolling down my face in pellets and my hair is becoming heavy from absorbing moisture and humidity. I've thought about cutting it shorter recently but considering the last time I tried cutting my hair it was so bad I almost had to shave my head and start fresh I keep talking myself out of it. I was actually Carl and Sophia's age when I did that so maybe I shouldn't be so surprised that Carl's been acting impulsive lately. Twelve can be a rough age.

"Carl!" I shout again.

"Shit woman why are you so loud?" I heard a southern twang call out. I look over to see Merle stumbling over to me. His eyes are bloodshot and he's squinting when the sun gets in his eyes. He's either going through a bad hangover or based on his shaking hands he's going through a withdraw.

"Have you heard your own voice Merle? It's not sweet as honey or angels singing. It's somewhere between nails on a chalkboard and a yapping dog." I say and turn my back on him to continue looking for Carl.

"Why are you being such a bitch? I don't normally like to hit women but I'm willing to make exceptions for cun…"

"You finish that sentence and I will castrate you!" I shout at him. God I absolutely hate that word.

"Jus telling the truth the way I see it. I'm trying ta help look for the kid and you still look like you hate me. What'd I do to you?" he said.

"Why are you helping anyway? Why do you care? Aren't you and you're brother going to leave us anyway? Maybe take a few things with you?"

"What are you rambling about?"

"I know Merle. I know you are going to rob us the first chance you get."

Silence. I hear nothing behind me except for heavy breathing, then I hear the leaves crunching at a wild speed and I have to sidestep really fast to avoid getting trampled by Merle who was furious. His face and eyes are as red as a wildfire, his breathing is so heavy you'd think he'd just run a marathon and his arms are trying to grab me like a claw machine trying to grab the one stuffed animal you actually want out of it.

"You bitch!" he yelled as he tried to grab me.

"Stop it!" I say as I keep evading him. He may be taller and stronger than me but I was faster than he was.

"No! You're gonna rat me out! Probably get me and Daryl killed!"

"That's a little extreme Merle!"

"Not in this situation. It's kill or be killed now and if you think I'm going to let some scrawny bitch get us killed then you're dumber than those brainless geeks."

He lunges at me once again. I can't avoid him this time so I put my arms up to protect myself and once he gets close enough to me I bring my knee up and hit him as hard as I could. I wasn't sure how effective it would be but it's enough to catch him off guard and I punch him in the Adams apple. He collapses to his knees and holds on to his throat trying to catch his breath. I didn't punch hard enough to stop him from breathing all together though; I don't want to stoop to his level.

"Look, I've known about this for days and I haven't told anybody. The only one who knows that I know is Daryl. This is why I have been avoiding the two of you for days. I don't know why you act the way you do, do the things you and keep making bad decisions but I do know that they affect more than just you. And I don't want anyone to get hurt, even you and your brother. So stop acting like a homicidal maniac, maybe clean up your act a little bit and if you do believe it's a kill or be killed situation don't do anything that will get you killed!"

I hear shouts in the distance. Mostly people calling for Carl but there is one call that's different for the others and coming closer to where we are. They are calling for Merle; and there is only one person in this camp who would call for Merle. I take off in the opposite direction. I still needed to look for Carl, Merle will probably try to attack me again if I stay any longer and even though it's not my biggest problem right now I'm not ready to talk to Daryl yet.

* * *

I somehow end up out of the woods and near the quarry again. I'm not near the camp though so I can't tell if I'm on the other side of the quarry or just a little further up than where we are stationed. I take a couple of steps forward and take in my surroundings. The grass is green and with a faint yellow glow from the afternoon sun, the sky is a clear blue with a couple of fluffy white clouds scattered here and there, and I'm sure if I peer over the ledge I'd see the calm and still water of the quarry.

"Natalie?" I hear soft voice say my name.

I turn my head to see Carl sitting on the grass close to the ledge looking at me with squinted eyes as the sun hits him in the face. Thank god he's okay.

"Carl we've been looking all over for you. Everyone's been worried about you, especially your mom." I say all in one breath, I actually didn't expect to be the one to find him and now I feel more worried that he's somehow going to get hurt on my watch.

"Can you back up a little bit from the ledge? You're making me worried you're going to fall all the way down into the water."

"There are some other ledges below it and a path close by, I wouldn't fall very far." He argues back but he still moves back a bit to ease my fears. Now that I'm calmer I see that he looks a little upset. I walk over and sit down next to him.

"Okay kid, what's going on? Why did you wander off?" I ask him.

"I don't need to tell you." He says back.

"True. You don't need to tell me but you might feel better if you tell me. I'm not going to judge you and I won't tell your mom if you don't want me to." He stays silent. I know he's really shy and doesn't talk to many people other than Lori, Shane, Sophia and Dale so I don't expect him to open up right away around me. So I look over the edge to see what he was talking about earlier. It wasn't a straight drop to the water because it was curved and there were some rock filled ledges along the way. I also saw the path Carl was talking about but it was still pretty far from where we were sitting and I don't want to find out what it's like to take a tumble down there.

"Ugh, I hate heights." I say out loud.

"You get scared?" Carl asked me.

"Of course I get scared. I'm scared of a few things."

"Like what?"

"Heights, closed spaces, bears, hurting those I care about, and most of all spiders." He starts laughing at the last part.

"Spiders? They're so tiny."

"Hey those things are creepy and gross with their multiple legs and sometimes they're furry and ugh." I start to gag as I talk about them and Carl is cracking up about me overreacting. "Just don't tell anyone else about it okay kid. Gotta keep a tough girl reputation." I say to him and he nods.

"I'm scared of things too." He says now being serious.

"Doesn't seem like it the way you wandered off like that. It's not safe by yourself." He pulls his legs up to his chin and wraps his arms around them.

"I just got tired of all the yelling. I was looking for firewood so mom wouldn't have to go out so much but when I got back everyone was yelling. There's been too much yelling, even before my dad died there was a lot of yelling between him and my mom." He looks like he's on the verge of tears remembering his dad. "He'd always tell me that I didn't need to hear it and to go find someplace that makes me feel happy. So I walked up here to get away from all the yelling."

I forgot how kids were always more observant than adults gave them credit for. Poor guy was just trying to help his mom, is still grieving for his dad, and had to share a camp with a little over thirty people (at least some of them branched off to form their own camps so we weren't squished together). That type of stress would break a lot of people.

"I don't blame you. I always hated when people would fight so if I was never involved in the actual fight I'd find ways to distract myself."

"Like what?"

"Well like you I would go off to a quiet place. But when I couldn't get away I would listen to my music which I really miss sometimes and I would read my books or some comics."

"I miss reading. I didn't bring my books when we left."

"Well you're in luck. I happen to have a box full of books in my car. So if you want we can go through them and I can lend you some when we get back."

"What do you have?"

"I have Harry Potter books, some batman comics and I know Reese loved Lord of The Rings and Star Wars."

"Can we go see them now?"

"Yeah, we need to tell everyone you're okay. How did you get here anyway?"

"I just walked along this hill until I got here. See the camp is down there." He says as he points to the right and I see the camp in the distance. I want to face palm myself as I realize that I must have walked around in circles in the woods when I could have just walked straight up the hill and found him.

"Of course it is…" I say as we get up. He starts running ahead to the camp.

"Hey slow down! Or at least stay away from the ledge!" I shout out to him. I feel my foot slip as I step a little too close to the edge and then the sensation of falling overcomes me. I flail as the ground beneath me crumbles and let out a yell before I grab the ledge.

"Natalie!" I hear Carl yell and look up to see him running towards me. If I thought I was sweaty earlier I must be nearly soaked right now from sheer panic.

_Huff_

_Huff_

_Huff_

Okay… just breathe… I can do this. I can do this. I try pulling myself up but the grass is being ripped out by the roots as I grab it and the dirt isn't hard enough to get a good grip on. Carl comes over and tries to grab my arm to help me up but he's too weak to help.

"Hang on!" Carl says to me.

"Carl don't hurt yourself. If I start to fall let go, I don't want you falling with me." I say to him as I feel myself being pulled down by gravity. Oh god please don't hurt badly!

"Natalie!" I hear someone shout from the forest. I look up to see someone running towards us. I can't make out their features until they get closer but I see a masculine build and recognize the voice.

"Daryl?"

"No no no!" Carl screams as his grip loosens on my arm until his hand slips out of mine.

As I fall all of my sensations hit me at once. I hear shouting that I can't understand, I feel the air against my skin as I plummet to the ground and I know it's not possible but I think my stomach somehow fell out of my body. My vision is starting blur as I see Carl crying and Daryl reaching the edge with a look of panic on his face.

…

…

…

_Thud!_

…

…

_Crack!_

_..._

…

…

_Thud!_

…

Pain… all I feel is pain and a warm liquid flowing down my forehead as my vision turns black…

* * *

**And this is where i leave you for now. Sorry but i wanted to put in a cliffhanger for a while now! Hope you liked it!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Review Responses:**

**smclendon: Glad you are liking the story so far and I'm glad that I was able to give a little insight into Merle's soul. I'm trying to delve deeper in some of the other souls as the story goes along.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the walking dead or any characters other than my OC.**

_Italics mean thoughts, memories and/or distant voices_

* * *

**Chapter 14**

Daryl's POV

He was roaming the woods looking for the little boy named Carl and his brother. He wasn't too concerned though about the boy, a twelve-year-old boy should be fine in the woods he thought. Hell he knew from experience. Daryl was more concerned about his brother. Merle was out of control, the withdraw was making him dangerous. That much was obvious at the camp when he pulled a gun out to shut everyone up. He was a ticking time bomb; there was no telling what he would do or who he would hurt if someone got him upset or made him feel threatened. The Dixons had a habit of attacking like wild animals when threatened, they lose all rationality and aim for the throat wanting to rip their enemy apart.

"Merle?" he called out.

Then a high-pitched scream hit Daryl's ears. It was a short cry but it was enough to make Daryl turn towards the source. He started to run towards it, for once hoping that his brother was not on the other end of it. 'Son of a bitch Merle, you better not have hurt a woman.' He thought to himself. Normally Merle didn't hurt women but he wouldn't put it past his brother if they were willing to fight. He heard another shout called out into the air, a younger sounding voice than the first one.

"Natalie!"

Her name triggered something in his brain. He had this mental image in his head of his brother pinning her to the ground and punching her repeatedly, the boy was watching helplessly from the side crying for it to stop. The image filled him with anger and fear for what was happening. That he didn't know why she screamed. He got closer to the end of the woods and still didn't see his deranged brother or the young woman who let out the scream.

"Natalie!" he lost control and shouted out her name.

As he got closer he saw why she shouted out. In front of him was Carl trying very hard to hold on to someone who was hanging on to a ledge, Natalie. If he thought he was running fast before now Daryl was running at light speed. But it felt like no matter how fast he ran she was still miles away from him. And just when he felt he was getting close enough to her, when he dropped his crossbow and dropped to his knees to grab her arm she slipped. His wildly beating heart had stopped for a moment as she fell farther away from his extended arm.

"No!" he shouted as he locked eyes with her. Her doe like eyes were wide and her arms were still extended towards him and Carl as she was twisting and falling closer to the rocky ledge below. His stomach lurched violently as he saw her head hit it and heard a noise that sounded like a crack and a thump. Then he was in shock as he saw her body tumble. Rolling down the hill like a tumble weed or a boulder from an Indiana Jones movie. Her body soon started to lose momentum and when she got to the last ledge she rolled off so slowly it was like she was rolling out of bed in her sleep. With a final thud she landed on her back. She wasn't moving though. Her body looked slightly twisted with her legs and head pointing in one direction and her body in the other. She was bleeding from her forehead and her eyes were fluttering trying to stay awake.

"No… No!" Daryl shouted looking at her from where he was. Carl was sobbing uncontrollably next to him.

Daryl leapt off the ledge and started sliding down the hill, making sure to avoid the rocks and ledges that Natalie had hit. When he reached her he took in her appearance. There was a long jagged cut on her forehead which was bleeding furiously. The liquid crimson was a sharp contrast against her pale skin. He grabbed her head and moved it very slowly so that it was aligned with her body.

"Natalie? Wake up! Come on!" he said to her but the brunette would not open her eyes. He put his hand close to her mouth to check if she was breathing.

….

….

She wasn't.

"Fuck!" he shouted taking his hand away. He put her head back down and straightened out her body. He had never tried to revive a person before but he was hoping that what he would see when he flipped through the channels on TV would work.

He crossed his right hand over his left hand placed it on her chest. He then proceeded to do CPR. One pump. Two Pump. Three pump. Then his hands left her chest and he held her head straight as he put his mouth on hers. He blew as hard as he could hoping he could somehow clear her airway and she could breathe on her own again. When he stopped breathing he went back to chest compressions. He felt some blood on his hand from where her wound had bled on him.

"Don't you dare die now Falco! Not because of a stupid fall!" he yelled at her as he kept pumping her heart. He wished he had more arms at that point so he could try to stop the bleeding.

"Is she dead?" He whipped his head around to see Carl coming down the path that led to the water.

"Come here. Take this and hold it against her head. Hold her head steady too." He took a rag out of his back pocket and handed it to Carl. Carl was holding back sobs as he placed it on her cut.

One pump. Two pump. Three pump.

He put his mouth over hers again and breathed. He was pushed back and his lips were detached from hers as her head sprung forward and she took a deep breath.

"Natalie!" Carl screamed happily as she woke up. But Daryl could see that she was still out of it. Her pupils were two different sizes and she looked like she had no idea what had happened to her.

"Falco? Can you hear me?" Daryl asked. She just looked up at him with a blank expression and her eyes tried to shut again. "Don't fall asleep! Stay awake!" he shouted at her.

"…mmph… wha?" She tried to speak but couldn't form full words. Not a good sign.

She then turned her head to the side and started to heave. The sound of coughing and liquid hitting the ground was enough to make anyone's stomach churn. Carl looked away and muttered an ew as he pulled his hand away from Natalie's wound. Daryl quickly took over and kept the rag firmly pressed to her head despite the fact that she was splattering his pants with her vomit.

"Let it out."

"feel… pinball machine…" she said.

"You hit your head pretty hard on the way down. And you bounced all the way to the bottom. Can you get up?" She grunted and tried to push herself up but she was shaking.

"Stop. Wouldn't kill you to ask for help." He said as he put one arm under her legs and the other around her back.

She wrapped her arms around his neck in order to support herself; he stiffened as he felt her small calloused fingers graze his skin. However this touch was different from the ones he was used too, there was no pain, anger, or pressure. It was warm, gentle, and most of all very tired. He needed to get her back to camp where she could get treated and rest properly. He lifted her up as gently as he could trying to make sure her head didn't shake from the sudden movement.

"We're heading back. Get you fixed up. Hey kid, go ahead and see who's there to help." He said the latter to Carl who ran ahead up the path to the others as Daryl took his time to make sure Natalie was safe.

"Daryl…" She looked up at him. Her brown eyes as murky as fresh mud after a rainstorm and her grip on him stiffened then felt as loose as jelly. The muscle in her arm was starting to convulse uncontrollably and soon her whole body fell into the rhythm of it.

"Natalie!" Daryl stopped and quickly put Natalie on the ground before she could fall out of his arms. He heard the shouts of other people coming. Time felt like it slowed down as he watched her seizing on the ground not being able to help her, the people surrounding her and shouting orders about what to do. He couldn't take it anymore. He walked away from the group, went to retrieve his crossbow and stalked off into the woods.

* * *

Natalie's POV

"_Natalie!" _I hear someone calling me but I can't call back.

I can't speak, can't move, I can't feel and I can't even see what is going on around me. My vision is mostly just a blinding white light and some shapes. First it was one shape that was very close to me but he (I believe it was a he, I can't remember) disappeared once the others came. The less shapes the better because they weren't helping me. If anything my vision was just becoming worse and I'm not sure how long I'll be able to think or remember this moment.

"_What's happening?"_

"_She's having a seizure!"_

"_What do we do? We got to help her?"_

"_We can't until she stops." _

"_Back up all of you! You're not helping!" _They scatter a bit as one of them comes closer to me.

"_It's okay Natalie. You're going to be okay." _

Those are words that I've heard so many times before but they always bring back a particular memory. I'm thrown back to a time before all this. Before the group, before Geeks, before and before Atlanta. I'm back in New York in one of the tiny row houses I've lived in as a child. In the kitchen where my mother used to make pancakes every Sunday before Church. The walls a fading pale blue, the pine cabinets that were crooked and threatened to fall off the wall, and the white vinyl floors had track marks from shoe prints. But I'm not just remembering this because I ache for the comfort of my home, I haven't thought of this place as home for years. I'm remembering the worse night of my life, a night I wish to forget. In front of me is the younger version of my sister. Sixteen years old crying on the floor holding a nine-year old version of myself.

"_It's okay Natalie, it's okay. You're okay." _She sobbed as she rocked me.

At first glance it looked like I was just sleeping. But when you really look, no matter how badly you don't want to, you see the bullet hole centimeters above my heart and blood flowing out of it and staining my purple nightgown. In front of us is a site that I want to turn away from so badly. More blood stains the white vinyl making this small kitchen look more like a slaughter-house. The source of that blood comes from two bodies. One is of the only man I have ever fully hated with every fiber of my body, he doesn't even deserve to be called human for all the chaos he brought on this night. The other is my mother, her pale golden-colored hair covers her face with tears streaming down it and the hole in her head.

"I wasn't sure if that was more for you or for me." I heard a voice talk from beside me. I turn away from the memory and see my sister right beside me. For once she does not look like a geek, she looks like her normal human self.

"I was so devastated that night. He came in, wanted mom, tried to get rid of us and then… this happened." She gestured back to the scene before us. "We already lost dad, mom was gone and I thought you were going with them. All I could say was it would be okay even if I didn't know it was true or if it applied to both of us." She finished. I look at her but see no emotion on her face, she really is just a figment of my imagination.

"Is it going to be okay though?" I ask. "Are we going to be okay?"

"You know where we went from here Nat."

"I don't mean from here. I mean from now. Are you really alive or am I chasing a ghost? Am I really okay or am I just surviving instead of living?" I ask.

"_Natalie you can't sleep now." _I heard someone call from a distance. Reese looked at me, I took in her eyes, the same shade of brown but they were duller than the pine cabinets on the wall.

"I think you know the answer. You just don't want to admit it."

"… you're the ghost I use as an excuse to keep going."

"But you don't have to. Right now we can go, end this pain that has been in our lives for so long. You be selfish for once. You don't need to care about anyone but yourself in that world." She reaches her hand out to me.

"_Natalie please wake up." _The voices are becoming more desperate. Do they really care that much about me? Am I a part of something?

The blood lifts off the ground, it begins to separate itself into little drops like rain before they evaporate into the air. The bodies on the ground begin to flicker like they are holograms before they disappear and the kitchen itself is starting to flicker. I need to make my choice now. I'm about to take my sisters hand when I notice something off about her. Her eyes are now an intense dark blue, the kind of dark blue that you only see in the ocean on a clear night. They are someone else's eyes. Someone who is becoming more important to me than I first thought. Someone who was the last person I saw before I everything went weird. I drop my hand before I can take it.

"That's not true. I do care about more than just myself. I care about the others, I care about you, Amy, Glenn, Dale, Carol, Sophia, Carl and I care about Daryl. I am still alive out there and even if you're not with me and there is no chance of finding you I'm not giving you up. I may have to put looking for you on hold ffom time to time but I'm never giving up on you." I say.

The whole kitchen disappears now. There's a strange feeling of someone poking at my head now and then even though I don't see anyone poking me. Reese is now starting to flicker away. I panic and reach out for her.

"Don't worry. I'm not leaving you, I'm never giving up on you either. But you are going back out there. You have some people that want you back." She smiles slightly as she disappears and a blinding light overtakes my sight before it clears and I'm now on the bed in Dale's RV. Carol is at my side with a needle and stitching up my head, behind her I see Dale, Glenn, and Amy watching. They look relieved when they realize I'm awake.

"Thank god Natalie." Dale breaks the silence. At this moment I've never felt more at home than I ever have in my life.

* * *

Daryl's POV

He was shooting whatever he saw. Squirrels, birds, chipmunks, whatever he could to get rid of his anger. He needed a distraction from what he happened. She's dying. That's what kept repeating through his mind since he left her. She's dying and nothing could be done to stop it. So he did what he always did. Shoot, reclaim the bolt and repeat the process. He heard someone stomping towards him but he didn't look up, he wanted them to go away.

"Most of these don't look like they got any meat on their bones." He heard his brother say.

"So long as they got some that's all that counts." He said back.

"Fuck's sake Daryl what's wrong with you. That best thing for us is if that girl dies."

"Shut up!" Daryl shouted back and threw himself at Merle. Merle caught him though and pinned him against a tree.

"You gonna hit your own brother? Over some little bitch who knew what we were up to? When were you going to tell me that lil bro?" shouted back.

"Didn't thought I had to. She wasn't gonna tell."

"How do you know?"

"Cuz she said she wouldn't. She gave me the chance to stop you or leave the camp altogether. That's the type of person she is, gives out chances no matter how shitty the person is!" Daryl said and he pushed Merle away from him. "How'd you know she knew and what happened to you? You look like shit."

"I found your girl while looking for the boy. She was being a bitch and when I asked real nice what was wrong she spilled her gut, punched me and made a run for it."

"You mean you attacked her to keep her quiet and she fought back."

"Whatever, point is that's how I found out. And don't think I'm a monster for thinking she's better off dead, she's not a bad person but I look out for us and no one else. She could get us in trouble once our chances run out and don't expect me to be around when it happens."

He walked back towards the camp. Daryl spat at the ground, grabbed his bolts and went back to the camp. His head was clearer now after his little fight with Merle, if you could even call it a fight if there were no fists or weapons. Even though he didn't like it he was accepting that there was a chance Natalie was dead or dying. Once she was gone he could go back to the way he was, just following Merle around and not giving a damn about anyone else. But when he got back to camp there was no one crying or looking upset. In fact most of the people were either going about their usual business or coming and going from the RV. He saw the kids by Natalie's car getting some books and stuff out of it and heading towards the direction of the RV. Dale was sitting on the top being a look out for the camp. He didn't look like a man who was grieving the loss of a friend and someone he thought of as a daughter. So that had to mean that Natalie was still alive. Daryl couldn't help but feel a sense of relief when he thought that but quickly dismissed it as he went over to his brother.

"Your girlfriend is tougher than she looks." He said.

"What'd you find out?"

"She's got the bed in there and people are taking turns to make sure she doesn't fall asleep for too long. Something about a concussion. So she can't go on the Atlanta trip tomorrow and I'm taking her place."

"Can't you stop looking for crack? What about your other stuff?"

"The pills get boring. Besides maybe Falco needs a good pain killer for a massive headache. You give her something and maybe she'll give you a little something." Merle teased and Daryl rolled his eyes. It was typical behavior for him and Merle. They get in a fight then act as if nothing happened. No matter how ugly it got they were still brothers.

* * *

**The next day**

"Gonna go hunting again?" Merle asked his brother as he gathered his bag and gun to go out.

"Yeah, probably be out for a few days. Don't get too fucked up because you're going to help me skin some squirrels."

"No promises D. No promises." With that Merle got in the vehicle with the others who were waiting for Glenn who was checking in on Natalie. He just got out of the RV and was about to go to the car when he saw Daryl.

"Um Daryl? Can I ask you something?" Glenn asked nervously. He never spoke to Daryl much because he always seemed afraid of pissing him off (something that was easy to do)

"What?" Daryl asked gruffly.

"Well… Natalie's upset she's not going and I'm afraid she's going to do something that could harm herself. She claims to be fine but she's not, I mean she is kind of but she forgets certain things and sometimes has run off sentaces…"

"Like you're doing now, get to the point china man." Daryl said.

"I'm… never mind, what I'm asking is maybe you could check on her."

"What do I look like a freaking babysitter?"

"Not at all. It's just I think out of all the people who are here she's less likely to win a fight with you. She respects you and I think she feels she owes you for helping her." Glenn finished. Daryl thought it was highly unlikely she would listen to him but if she was hell-bent on hurting herself he was going to tell her off about it.

"If it means you'll go I'll check on her once then I'm going hunting."

"Thanks. She's in there with the kids now and Amy's going to go keep her company in a little bit so you can see her now or after Amy"

Someone beeped the horn at that point and Glenn hurried off to the car and left. As soon as they took off Daryl saw the kids walk out of the RV and decided to go check on Natalie. When he stepped in he saw that there were books, a checker board and a first aid kit on the table. The kids must have brought that stuff in to distract her when she couldn't sleep for long periods of time. He looked towards the room and saw that the door was wide open and she was lying on the bed, she almost looked asleep but he heard a faint noise as he went over to her. She had some type of MP3 player blasting music as loud as she could and looked like she was losing a battle between herself and falling asleep from boredom. He went up to her and ripped the earphone out of her ear.

"Hey I was listening to that!" She argued back as tried to grab it but Daryl lifted the device higher in the air out of her reach.

"Yeah and probably going deaf from it. What the hell are listening to anyway? It sounds like a bunch of screaming." He said and started scrolling through her songs.

"Forgive me for not being one of those girls who's into sappy love or country songs that all sound the same or pop music that sounds like a robot dying." She snapped back.

"Can understand that, let's see what you got. Some stuff by Metallica, The Animals, Bruce Springsteen, Nirvana, Guns N Roses…" he looked up at her with narrowed eyes. "you bullshitter there's some country stuff and Coldplay on here."

"I can explain. My mother liked country, she used to play it on the radio every morning so I have her favorites to honor her."

"and Coldplay?"

"… we all have our guilty pleasures and they do have good songs. My sister used to sing Fix You a lot whenever I was down." He rolled his eyes at that but saw her go sad when she mentioned her sister.

"Can you be honest with me?" she asked "Do you think there's a chance she's still out there? Everyone else has been pretty optimistic about it but you're the one person I know would tell me what they think no matter how rude or blunt it might be."

"Honestly I don't think it's going to happen. I think it's been too long and from the way you describe her she doesn't seem strong enough to fight back but I've been wrong before about stuff."

"Name some."

"I thought that the dead could never come back to kill us, you'd never get the hang of that bow, and I thought you were going to die when you fell and had that seizure yet here you are still a thorn in my side."

"At least I'm not a pain in your ass." She teased.

"Same thing more or less. I'm getting used to you."

"Same to you. Thanks again for helping me… god I sound like a damsel in distress if you count all the times you helped me out. When am I going to save your ass for once?"

"That's not how it works princess."

"Don't ever call me princess. I have never in my life wanted to be treated like a princess. I always wanted to be the warrior, the knight in shining armor or Lara Croft."

"That hot tomb raider chick with the big jugs?"

"Really? That's what you took away from the conversation? Whatever hand me that shirt over there. I wanna change and get some fresh air."

"You're not leaving here. You're supposed to keep your ass in that bed."

"My ass appreciates your concern but I'm fine really."

"The stitches on your head, the bags under your eyes and the fact that you look like shit says otherwise."

"Oh Daryl you really know how to make a girl feel beautiful." She says sarcastically. "But seriously I'm fine. Do whatever tests you want on me."

"Fine how many fingers am I holding up?" He asks and puts his hand up.

"Three." She was right, he puts up more fingers. "Five." He puts some down. "Two" puts one more down "Okay now you're flipping me off asshole."

"You're still not leaving. Not on my watch."

"Fine commander. But I still want that shirt. This one still has sweat and blood from yesterday." He walks over and grabs the black tank top with lace on the neckline and throws it at her.

"Thanks" she gives him a look to leave but he doesn't budge.

"What? If you're expecting a strip tease or something I don't do it for free."

"Just making sure you don't run out."

"Whatever you say." She turns around so her back is too him and removes the t-shirt she had on the day before. He's about to turn away to give her some privacy but something catches his eyes, sticking out from underneath her hair was some type dark brown of pattern he couldn't fully make out. He had a faint idea about what it was but her shirt was soon covering them along with her hair before he could confirm it. She turned around to see him staring at her.

"Enjoying the show?" She asks. Before he could ask the door to the RV opens up and Amy comes walking in.

"Hey Natalie sorry I meant to come sooner but I got held up by… oh I didn't know you had company." Her eyes went wide when she saw that Daryl was in the room.

"I was just leaving. I'm going hunting, won't be back for a day or so." He said the last part mostly to Natalie.

"Have fun." She said and he walked out towards the door. But before he left he turned to Amy.

"Watch her. No matter how many times she tells you she's fine don't believe her."

"Don't you have a deer to catch or something?" Natalie said ticked off.

"Yep, gonna get it too." He said and left the RV.

* * *

Natalie's POV

Once Daryl left the RV Amy turned to me and gave me a look.

"What? Nothing happened. We just hung out." I said.

"Really? You're telling me that after everything that went on, you two having some type of feud you refuse to tell me about, having a near death experience with him coming to your rescue and being alone in this RV that nothing happened at all."

"Yes. I don't know why you insist something is going on. Besides I can't even remember what happened after I hit my head. Everything from that day is still gone." She sits on the end of the bed with me.

"Well I got some details from Carl about what happened."

"Really? He already feels bad enough about it. Him and Sophia keep trying to cheer me up with checkers and reading my books for me. Did you have to probe him for details."

"I didn't probe… I just gently asked if he wanted to talk to feel better." Okay I've been known to do that to people from time to time so I'd be a hypocrite for judging her for that.

"And what did he say?"

"That you found him and talked to him until he felt better. That you and him were going back to your car to get some books you promised him."

"That part he reminded me about. I gave him and Sophia the key and told them to stay away from the personal items and weapons or else. He was nice enough to get me my MP3 player."

"Then he said you telling him to be careful when you fell over." Of course I do the very thing I was warning him about. "Daryl came running when he heard you yell but it was too late. He said he looked devastated and rushed down to see if you were okay. He kept trying to wake you up, had Carl put pressure on your cut while he did CPR." Wow, Daryl really did all that for me? After how I treated him for the past couple days?

"Still doesn't mean anything."

"I don't know. I was there when you had your seizure. He was pretty upset seeing you like that, everyone was. But he went off to the woods when everyone else got involved."

"That's because he doesn't like hectic situations where he can't use his crossbow to fix things."

"It was bad. I was in tears and everyone else was yelling about what we should and shouldn't do. Dale was the only one who was able to calm us down enough to figure out what to do, he kept insisting on doing everything to make sure you were okay. But my point is I think you mean more to Daryl than you think you do. Maybe not in a romantic way but he does care about you."

"I think we're at the point where it's getting hard not to care about each other. I'd be devastated if anything happened to any of you guys."

"So would I. Do you think something will?"

"We've been really lucky for a while. Sometimes it's like you can forget about what happened and think we're just some weird hippy commune but there's always a part of me that's waiting for the other shoe to drop. Wow this is depressing, where are the kids? I could go for another game of checkers."

"I'll go get them." Amy says as she gets off the bed to go find them. But I can't shake the thoughts from my head. I have a bad feeling and would feel a lot better when Glenn and the others got back.

_You don't need to care about anyone but yourself in that world. _I hear Reese's words in my head. Well it's too late now.

* * *

**And as of this moment I am now going to start writing from the first episode. I don't know for certain if I can have the next chapter up by next week because it's probably going to take me a while to read through the episodes and try to find out how Natalie reacts to certain situations, what her dialogue should be like, and some personal things in my life that may keep me away from writing. I'll see what I can do but I feel that from now on the content of this story is more of a priority than how fast I can post it. **

**In other news The Walking Dead Season 5 starts on Sunday! I just need to finish four episodes of season 4 to be caught up and I'm all good to go! I'm sure everyone here is very excited about it and probably more so than me if you've been waiting for months since season 4 ended. **

**As always feel free to favorite and follow if you haven't already and all reviews are welcome. **


	15. Days Gone By and Guts

**Early update! So yeah I decided that to celebrate reaching 50 follows that I'd upload this chapter now and possibly upload the next chapter tomorrow. Thank you all who have favorited or followed! We are now officially beginning season one! So i thank all of you who have been patient and kept reading up to this point. I think I'll start a new tradition where if I reach a certain amount of favorites or follows (ex: 25, 50, 75) I'll post two chapters that week with one before Friday and one on Friday like usual. **

**Review Responses**

**TheMaskedSaint: Thank you! I will keep going! **

* * *

Days Gone By/Guts

"I seriously don't know how you and Carl don't get bored with this game." I say with a disgruntled look on my face trying to figure out a strategy to win. It would probably help if I knew how to play but I haven't played checkers since I was a kid and the rules seem to be escaping me.

"You're just saying that because you're losing." Sophia said from the opposite end of the board with her pile of chips looking like a mountain compared to mine. I rolled my eyes but I couldn't deny it wasn't true. Normally I'm the biggest sore loser but Sophia is just so sweet that I'm trying to behave and not curse every time she kings me.

"That may be true but that doesn't make it any less boring. No offense Soph but it's just not my kind of game."

"Then what is?"

"Well I used to like to play video games but that's not an option anymore. I would play darts, solitaire, gold fish, poker, war, Uno was a fun game did you ever play that one?" I ask.

"Yeah. Me and mommy used to play that one a lot when daddy would go out. I used to try to get him to play because it always ends fast with two people but he never would." She looks sad as she says the last part. I hate that anytime we talk it somehow always ends up with her dad being mentioned and making her sad.

"Yeah I used to notice the same thing. I don't have any Uno cards on me but I'll tell you what, when I can go out on a run I'll keep an eye out for a toy store or some place that has them. We can have a game night and have anyone we want play."

"That'd be great! But you have to get better because I don't want you to get hurt again. That was really scary."

"I'm sorry sweetie. Trust me I'm upset with myself for not paying close enough attention and I'm getting tired of everyone treating me like a porcelain doll. I'm perfectly fine, in fact I think it's time to get out of this hotbox." I say as I get off the bed. Sophia looks horrified as I get off the bed and sway a little.

"Don't worry. It's just a head rush. I got up too fast after being in bed too long."

"Are you sure? I can get mommy or someone if you're feeling bad." She said with concern.

"It's okay. You shouldn't even be taking care of me. Go play with the other kids and have fun."

She looked like she was going to argue back but the thought of playing with the other kids was too tempting so she nodded her head and went out of the RV. Finally! As much as I love Sophia I need to get out of this cramped RV and get some air. I'm going bored out of my mind just lying in bed and having people distract me with board games, books and gossip. I don't even have my music now because that son of a bitch Daryl stole my MP3 player without me noticing before he left to go hunting. He's probably going to drain the battery before giving it back to me and I won't be able to listen to my music again for who knows how long. Or maybe he just didn't realize he still had it before he left but either way it still sucks and I have half a mind to track him down to get it back. I get out of the RV to see everyone going about their day from hanging clothes on the clothes line to sitting around and talking. Dale is talking to one of the people in the camp who arrived a couple weeks ago, Shane's chopping wood, and Lori is doing laundry with Carl sitting right beside her. I see Amy walking back carrying branches for the fire; she gives me a scolding look for being out of bed to which I just give her a shrug.

"_Hello. Hello. Can anybody hear my voice?" _the CB radio goes off and everybody turns their attention to it. We've kept it on almost every day but it hasn't gone off since the time Glenn signaled for help and when I thought I heard my sister on the other end. We all start going towards it like it was some type of siren song we had to follow. Amy drops the firewood and sprints to pick it up before he could hang up.

"Hey. Hello?"

"_Can you hear my voice?"_

"Yes, I can hear you. You're coming through. Over."

"_Anybody who reads, please respond. Broadcasting on emergency channel. We'll be approaching Atlanta on Highway 85. Anybody reads, please respond." _He sounds so formal like he's done this a million times. Was he a cop, state trooper, or maybe someone in the army who was looking for survivors? But if he was then why would he be going to Atlanta where everyone is either dead or dying?

"We're just outside the city. Damnit. Hello? Hello? He couldn't hear me. I couldn't warn him." She says upset.

"Hey don't beat yourself up." I say as I get closer to her and inspect the radio.

"Try to raise him again." Dale speaks up. "Come on, son. You know best how to work this thing." He says to Shane who was coming over with his ax. He slams the axe into the tree stump and tries to work the radio.

"Hello, hello, is the person who calls still on the air? This is Officer Shane Walsh, broadcasting a person unknown, please respond. He's gone." At that moment Lori and Carl come over.

"There are others." she says. "It's not just us."

"Yeah," Shane says "We knew there would be, right, that's why we left the CB on.

"Lots of good it's been doing. And I've been saying for a week, we ought to put signs up on 85 to warn people away from the city."

"Wait." I interrupt. "We didn't get the signs up on 85? I thought that's how we got all these people here?

"We didn't get that far. Someone insisted we stay closer to camp in case of trouble." Lori says pointing towards Shane.

"That doesn't matter now." Amy interrupts. "They said they were heading towards the city. Folks got no idea what they're getting into."

"We don't have enough time." Shane says.

"I think we need to make time."

"Yeah, that, uh… That's a luxury we can't afford. We are surviving here. We are day to day."

"And who the hell would you propose to send?"

"He said he was on 85. If you give me back my keys I'll go see if I can stop them in time." I offer.

"It's okay Natalie, you still need to recover. I'll go. Give me a vehicle." Lori said

"Nobody goes anywhere alone, you know that." Shane said, boy did we know that by now.

"Yes, sir." She says mockingly and goes away, I'm a little surprised she agrees with me for once. Carl tries to follow her but Shane holds him back.

"Hey, hey, hey, come on, take a sit, buddy. You're alright, go on, you're alright." He says before he starts to follow Lori. Another lover's quarrel it looks like. I go to Carl who took a seat on the log.

"It's okay kid. This disagreement will blow over soon." I tell him as I take a seat right next to him

"Natalie what are you doing out of the RV?" Dale questions me.

"I got tired of lying around in bed doing nothing. I'm not a vegetable."

"But you could have a concussion." Amy spoke up. "If you do too much you could really hurt yourself."

"I'm fine really. Do whatever tests you can think of if you want but are we really going to just let that guy go into Atlanta? What if he's alone? We didn't hear anyone else on the other end of that call." I say. At that moment Carl gets up to go find his mom. We didn't even stop him.

"I don't like it either but I don't think we can catch up to him now." Dale says. "We don't even know if he's going to make it to Atlanta." I let out a sigh. Damn, I hate the idea that someone is just about to obliviously wander into a death trap. The same one that our friends are in right now.

"I guess you're right. No word from the others yet?"

"Not yet. I'm a little worried too. I thought they would have checked in by now." Amy said grimly.

"Hey it's still early. Remember when I went we didn't check in for a long time and they're probably just out of range and trying to find a good spot. We don't need to worry yet." Amy nods her head and tries to look positive but it's not working. "Hey, why don't we go do something? Get your mind off things and I could definitely use a walk. I was also thinking of getting one of my camera's out to take some pictures.""

"You girls could go mushroom picking." I hear Lori say as she walks up to us with Carl. "Take those buckets and fill em with as much as you can."

"Sounds like a good idea to me. Won't be too stressful for you to do Natalie." Dale spoke up.

"It's not exactly something I had in mind but I guess it'll do. Come on Amy." I say as we go grab the buckets by my car and one of my Polaroid cameras.

"I thought you hated picking mushrooms. I thought you hated mushrooms in general." Amy says as she grabs the two buckets.

"Yes and yes. They're nothing but a tasteless fungus that could possibly be poisonous but it gets them off our backs and maybe if I go in the woods far enough I'll find the asshole who stole my MP3 player." I say as I get the camera out of the box I kept it in. I see Sophia playing with Eliza and Louis and take a picture of them as they are running around. I gently grab photo and watch the image appear slowly.

"That's a good one." Amy says.

"Not too bad. I was thinking of taking some photos of the group here and make some sort of portfolio to keep track of everyone. I'm getting tired of not putting names to faces."

"That's not a bad idea; you might want to get permission first though. Okay are we going mushroom picking or what?" she says as I keep taking pictures of people around camp. I grab my throwing knives in case we run into trouble and my backpack to gently place my camera and photos in to keep them safe.

"Lead the way."

* * *

"Do all mushrooms look phallic or is my mind just really dirty?" I ask as we look over the mushrooms we collected. She laughs as I say this, which is my goal since she's been pacing the camp worrying about Andrea.

"I think that's your mind telling you something."

"I'll admit it's been a while but I'm not going to jump on the next guy I see."

"How long is a while?"

"Let's see… we've been out here for about two months?" she shrugs. "Okay we'll say it's about two months and before that I broke up with my boyfriend and moved out here three months. There was a little tension going on before we actually broke up so I guess it's been about five and a half months."

"What's been about five and a half months?" I look over and see Carl and Sophia had walked over to us. Oh crap! Amy starts giggling to which I respond with giving her a glare. Okay, what can I say that to get out of this awkward situation?

"Um…" oh great start Natalie! Nothing suspicious about that! "It's been about five and a half months since I had mushrooms…" they both looked at me weirdly for saying that. Okay I said the first thing that came to mind and I have a bucket of mushrooms. Sue me!

"Why would you count how long it's been for mushrooms?" Carl asked.

"Because we just went picking mushrooms and Natalie was telling me about the last time she had mushrooms and got sick. That's why she was telling me it's been so long since she had them." Amy continued.

"Yes! That is why!" I say. They are still looking at us like were a bunch of whack jobs. Honestly they're twelve years old they must know about sex by now right? But they do have some strict parents so I think I'll take being thought of as a whack job over getting yelled at for talking about sex in front kids.

"I'm going to see what Dale and Jim are up to." Amy said.

After that the kids scattered and I was back to sorting mushrooms. I was bored out of my mind and wish I had my music but Daryl was nowhere to be found on my oh so magical trip gathering mushrooms with Amy. It mostly consisted of me reassuring her that Andrea and the others were fine and making sure that mushrooms we picked up were edible and not old or already half eaten by other animals. I look behind me to see Dale and Jim at the RV, I don't understand why it needs to be repaired so often when it hasn't been moved since we got here.

"Boy, that hose isn't long for this world, is it?" Dale said

"No sir." Jim replied. The two have bonded over their knowledge of fixing cars ever since I brought Jim to the camp.

"Where the hell are we gonna find a replacement?"

"It's late. They should've been back by now." Amy spoke up. I let out a sigh, I understand why she's worried but she can't let it eat away at her. Sure it looks like there's a storm coming and they haven't checked in yet but it's only been a day, and its not even over yet.

"Worrying won't make it better." Dale tried to talk sense into her.

"Yeah Amy, they are probably going to contact us soon. If it gets dark and they still haven't come back or checked in I will call them myself and gather up a search party if you want."

"There ya go. Nothing to worry about. How you doing Natalie?" Dale asked.

"Bored out of my mind but I'm good. No headaches or any other bad signs." I replied back.

At that moment the radio squawks. I hear T-Dog on the other end of the Radio and Dale rushes over to grab the radio at a surprising speed.

"_Hello, base camp! Can anybody out there hear me? Base camp, this is T-Dog. Anybody hear me?"_

"Hello? Hello? Reception's bad on this end. Repeat. Repeat."

"_Shane, is that you?" _The reception must be bad on both ends if T-Dog could mistake Dale for Shane.

"Is that them?" Lori asks as her Shane and Carl join in.

"_We're in some deep shit. We're trapped in the department store." _

"He said they're trapped?" Damn. I was really hoping that I imagined he said that.

"_There are geeks all over the place. Hundreds of 'em. We're surrounded."_

"T-Dog, repeat that last. Repeat." Dale begged but the radio went dead.

"God no…" I whispered. "Did anyone else hear that?" I didn't want to believe it.

"He said the department store." Lori spoke up

"I heard it too." Dale said

"Shane?" We all turn to him. Wanting to say the same thing but not having the courage to actually speak it.

"No way." He said. "We do not go after them. We do not risk the rest of the group. Y'all know that."

"They are our friends Shane!" I shout at him. "This isn't like that stranger on the radio, these are people we know and care about."

"I know that Natalie! But like I said earlier it's too risky."

"So we're just gonna leave her there?" Amy joined in

"Look, Amy, I know that this is not easy…"

"She volunteered to go to help the rest of us."

"I know, and she knew the risks, right? See, if she's trapped, she's gone. So we just have to deal with that. There's nothing we can do." Wrong words! Those are the wrong fucking words!

"She's my sister, you son of a bitch!" Amy takes off after he says that. The thunder starts to get louder as Shane and Lori look at each other before she goes off to comfort Amy. Shane walks over to Carl and pats him on the shoulder.

"Come on. It's all right, buddy." He says to him.

I just glare at Shane. I feel so much anger right now. It's almost like my eyes are trying to burn a whole in his head because he looks up and meets my gaze. Dale climbs down from the RV and puts a hand on my shoulder to try to calm me down but i shrug it off.

"Natalie. It's okay."

"I'm going. Where are my keys?" I say as I head towards my car.

"Natalie wait! Calm down. The storm is getting worse." Dale said.

"Jim do you have my keys?" I approach him, he holds them out reluctantly but I take them and head to my car.

"Carl go to Carol and Sophia. It's going to be okay. Natalie stop it!"

"No Shane I won't! It was supposed to be just me and Glenn. We had a plan, go in, get stuff and look for signs of Reese and get out. The fewer people meant that no one else had to worry about losing their loved ones. No one else needed to help out if you and Lori hadn't butted in or if I hadn't gotten hurt."

"Well it didn't work out that way. And I'm not risking the rest of the group no matter how much they want to go. That includes you as well."

"But they're not just members of a group they are people! They are someone's sister, friends, father/husband and brother that are out there! Do you really want tell what you just told Amy to Miranda, her kids or Daryl because they are probably going to react just as bad if not worse than Amy."

"They wanted to go." Dale spoke up. "You couldn't stop them. And you know that you couldn't go. No one would let you after what happened. I know you want to spare everyone else from feeling what you feel about your sister but you need to remember we don't know the whole story. All we know now is that they are in a department store. They are smart and resourceful people Natalie; you know Glenn is one of the smartest people we have met. All you need to do now is have faith that they will come back."

The thunder cracks loudly. The rain should be coming in soon. Of course we haven't had rain in the longest time and it comes at this dramatic moment. I feel the first drop hit my skin. The little perfect tear drop shatters as it hits my slightly tanned and dirty skin. It feels cool and welcoming compared to the humidity that has hung in the air for so long. My hand is on the door to my car, already unlocked and waiting for me to open it. I let out a sigh and take my hand off the door. Dale and Shane were right; there was nothing I could do in this state of mind and I have to trust that they are going to get out. But that doesn't stop me from glaring at Shane.

"You better hope that they all come back okay." I say as I go to back to my tent.


	16. Tell it to the Frogs

**Okay here is Tell it to the Frogs! There's a lot more in this one because the last one was just the short scenes from the camp in the first two episodes. So I'm going to try to put each episode in one whole chapter but there may be times where I have to split them into two parts if I feel it's too much. **

**Review Responses:**

**Caysie: And more you shall get! **

* * *

Tell it to the Frogs

"It's not going to go off if you keep staring at it."

"I know that Dale. I just… don't know what else to do. I can't concentrate on anything else."

I'm up on the roof of the RV waiting by the radio hoping they contact us soon. After the rain came it seems that everyone calmed down, everyone except me that is. Lori was giving Carl a haircut he didn't want while Shane was cleaning out his gun. The Morales kids were fighting over some toy or something they found and Jim was hanging up cans to alert us if geeks or any other intruders came across us.

"Just be patient. It'll all work out." A high-pitched screech started to echo throughout the canyons. We looked at each other in shock. Was that a car? Who was it?

"Dale, is that what I think it is?" I ask as he brings his binoculars up to his eyes to get a better view.

"Talk to me, Dale!" Shane yells up to us.

"I can't tell yet."

"Well it's not geeks, last time I checked they don't wail like that." I say

"Is it them? Are they back?" Amy shouts

"I'll be damned."

"What is it?"

"A stolen car is my guess."

"Holy shit! It's gotta be Glenn!" I shout happily and practically jump down the ladder from the RV to meet up with Glenn who managed to hot-wire a beautiful red doge challenger with black striped decals. When he got out of the car I ambushed him with a hug. He would have fallen on his back if the car wasn't behind him.

"God don't scare me like that again you asshole!"

"Sorry! I wished you were there. Well not for the ambush, I meant the ride."

"Holy crap. Turn that damn thing off!" Dale shouted at Glenn ending our reunion.

"I don't know how!"

"Pop the hood, please. Pop the damn hood, please." Shane says. Glenn goes to pop the hood and we're surrounded by people shouting all at once.

"My sister Andrea…"

"Pop the damn hood!

"What? Okay okay. Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah yeah!

"Is she okay? Is she all right?

"Guys calm down! He just got back!" I shout as Glenn pops the hood. They don't listen to me though.

"She's okay! She's okay!"

"Is she coming back?"

"Yes!"

"Why isn't she with you? Where is she? She's okay?" Back and forth Amy and Glenn talk and Shane finally turns off the damn alarm.

"Amy calm down, I'm sure they're fine and on their way. Right Glenn?"

"Yes! Yeah, fine. Everybody is… Well, Merle not so much." Wait… Merle? Oh shit what the hell happened?

"Wait what do you mean by that? What happened to…?"

"Are you crazy!" Shane interrupts me "Driving this wailing bastard up here? Are you trying to draw every Walker for miles?

"Shane it's not his fault. He said he didn't know how to turn it off." I defend Glenn.

"I think we're okay." Dale says

"You call being stupid okay?"

"Well, the alarm was echoing all over these hills. Hard to pinpoint the source. I'm not arguing. I'm just saying. It wouldn't hurt you to think things through a little more carefully next time, would it?"

"Sorry." Glenn says "Got a cool car."

"I call shotgun!" I shout breaking the silence.

"I'll do you one better, you can drive it later."

The next thing I know a truck drives up and parks next to the challenger Glenn parked. Andrea gets out of the truck. When they see each other Amy and Andrea call out each other's names and run to hug. Morales gets out of the truck and his wife and children runs up to him and in the very back Jacqui and T-Dog climbed out. There's a smile on my face seeing all the families being reunited but there was a part of me that was sad. The one that even though knew it was very unlikely hoped that my sister would come out of that truck and I would have the same reunion as Amy and Andrea.

"You are a welcome sight." Dales says to Morales as they laugh and hug it out.

"I thought we had lost you folks for sure."

"I thought you said to have faith and they were resourceful enough to get out Dale?"

"Someone had to be positive Natalie. Plus you were hell bent on going in there like a mad woman and had to stop you."

"How'd y'all get out of there anyway?" Shane asked

"New guy… he got us out." Glenn said.

"New guy?"

"The one in the Driver's seat of the truck?" I ask when I spot the new guy.

"Yeah, crazy Vato just got into town. Hey, helicopter boy! Come say hello."

Said Vato gets out of the truck. He's wearing a cop uniform that you found more in small towns than in the city. He's a handsome man with wavy brown hair and piercing blue eyes. They kind of remind me of the ones Carl had. Maybe he was the guy on the CB radio earlier.

"The guy's a cop like you." Morales says to Shane.

The look on Shane and the others guy's faces were looks of shock and recognition. Maybe they worked together when Shane used to be a cop. When the other guys eyes lock on to something behind me he looks like he's about to break down as he walks toward his goal.

"Oh my god."

"Dad! Dad!" I hear Carl yell and turn to see Lori and Carl running towards him.

Carl reaches him first and hugs the man so tightly that they both almost fall to the ground. I hear his dad let out a cry before he picks up Carl and walks towards Lori. Lori looks like a deer in the headlights as the man walks towards her and she wraps her arms around both of them. It's an unbelievable sight. This guy that had saved the group is actually Lori's supposedly dead husband and Carl's father. They thought for certain that they would never see him again yet here he is in the flesh and crying tears of joy because he found his family. I feel tears well up in my eyes at the sight. How can miracles like this still happen? I thought that if there was a God he checked out by now and left us on our own.

"Is this really happening?" I ask out loud.

"I think so." Glenn responded. "Natalie where's Daryl? We need to tell him about Merle." I wipe the tears from my eyes and look at him.

"Out hunting. Won't be back till tomorrow… is Merle dead?"

"… I'm sorry Natalie."

* * *

I feel numb as we sit around the camp fire that night. We all got filled in on everything that happened. How they got stuck, met Rick, handcuffed a drug-crazed Merle to a pipe, the sewer, the geek guts, the car and finally how they had to leave Merle behind when they made their escape. When I first heard it I was angry. Angry at Merle for acting like the biggest asshole on the planet at the worse time. Angry at people who didn't feel guilty about leaving Merle there. And mostly, even though I won't admit it, angry at myself for not being there. If I had gone than Merle wouldn't have had to volunteer to go in my place, or even if he had gone I could have made sure he came back in one piece. Don't get me wrong, I still dislike Merle and think he deserves to be chained up now and then when he acts out but leaving him on that roof for the geeks to eat him was just wrong and it's hard to believe he's gone. The only person who looked like he was having a worse time than me was Shane. Ever since Rick showed up Shane's been in shock and doesn't look as happy as you'd think someone would be if they found out their best friend was still alive. It's probably because of some guilty feelings hooking up with Lori or maybe he's jealous that Rick is now the center of attention. Everyone is hanging on to his every word about what happened when he woke up in the hospital.

"Disoriented." Ricks words broke my train of thought. "I guess that comes closest. Disoriented. Fear, confusion… all those things but… Disoriented comes closest.

"Words can be meager things. Sometimes they fall short." Dale says

"I felt like I'd been ripped out of my life and put somewhere else. For a while I thought I was trapped in some coma dream, something I might not wake up from ever."

"Mom said you died." Carl said from Rick's lap. The Grimes family was cuddled up by the fire, like if they let go something would tear them away from each other.

"She had every reason to believe that. Don't you ever doubt it." Lori still had a guilty look in her eyes though when he said that.

"When things started to get really bad, they told me at the hospital that they were gonna medevac you and the other patients to Atlanta, and it never happened."

"Well, I'm not surprised after Atlanta fell. And from the look of that hospital, it got overrun."

"Yeah, looks don't deceive." Shane finally spoke up. "I barely got them out, you know?"

"I can't tell you how grateful I am to you, Shane. I can't begin to express it."

"There go those words falling short again. Paltry things."

Nearby, Ed puts another log on his fire. And Shane goes to confront him about it. I don't pay attention to that though, I don't care about Ed being an ass tonight. The only thing I do care about is that Daryl's out on his own with no idea about happened to his brother. I know what that's like and how devastating it is to realize that the only family you have left is possibly gone forever. It's something that I wouldn't wish on anyone.

"You okay Natalie?" I hear Glenn ask. I look up to see some concerned looks. It was mostly just Glenn and Dale. T-Dog looked a little guilty because he blames himself but I don't blame him. From what I heard he actually tried to help Merle despite all that happened.

"Fine… I'm fine, just have a little headache."

"Your head okay? Because I think it's safe for you to have aspirin."

I look to see Shane stomp out a fire and check Carol and Sophia. Whenever they're around Ed they're more withdrawn than usual. I wonder if it were Ed instead of Merle would they care if he died.

"I'm okay for now. I'm just thinking too much."

Shane rejoins the group at this point. Dale must have known what I was thinking about because he asked the question I've wanted to ask for a long time.

"Have you given any thought to Daryl Dixon? He won't be happy to hear his brother was left behind."

"I'll tell him. I dropped the key. It's on me." T-Dog says.

"I cuffed him. That makes it mine."

"Guys, it's not a competition." Glenn says. "I don't mean to bring race into this, but it might sound better coming from a white guy." I let out a chuckle at that which gives me some looks.

"Sorry… bad habit. But I don't think race matters at this point. Daryl's going to be just as mad about it no matter who tells him."

"I did what I did. Hell if I'm gonna hide from him." T-Dog says.

"We could lie." Amy speaks up.

"How could you say that Amy?" I snap at her. "If it were Andrea wouldn't you want to know about what happened to her? No matter how bad it was?" I feel a hard pressure on my head and start to rub my temples.

"Natalie…"

"I'm going to go get some aspirin." I say and walk away from the fire.

I go to my tent where I managed to convince everyone to let me stay there again. I felt guilty about taking Dale's bed, especially since I didn't get to sleep for long without someone waking me up to check on me every hour or two. I found the aspirin bottle, grabbed two pills and a bottle of water to take them with. After I swallow I take a deep breath. I didn't want to make a scene but I wasn't sure how much I longer I could sit there and not lose my cool while they were talking about what to do with Daryl. Especially after what Amy said. I know she probably just said it without thinking but it was still pretty heartless to say. Just because we were afraid of how Daryl would react it doesn't mean we should leave out everything that happened. I'd want to know everything that happened to my sister no matter how bad it is. At least I'd have some closure.

"You okay in there?" I hear a voice call from outside my tent. What surprises me though is that it's the last person I'd expect.

"Rick? Why aren't you with the others?"

"Fire's going out and I wanted to check on you. Can I come in?" I want to say no but he's got one of those of voices that makes it sound like he genuinely cares and makes it hard to say no.

"I'll come out. My tent's not decent enough for company." I say as I unzip my tent flap and come out. "I'm fine, you shouldn't have had to come. I mean you just found your family, you should be with them."

"I will, after I properly introduce myself to you and ask you some questions. As you know I'm Rick, Rick Grimes." He holds out his hand. Well this was kind of weird but I'll go along.

"Natalie Falco." I say as I shake his hand.

"I hope I don't sound rude but it seems like you were somewhat acquainted with Merle and his brother. It's hard to picture Merle being friends with anyone, especially…"

"Someone young, tiny and fragile looking as me." I let out a huff after I say that."Well we aren't close. In fact a lot of time it was mostly just him harassing me and me making snide remarks towards him. But I met him and Daryl around the time this all started and they helped me out when I couldn't take on too many geeks at once."

"A walker attack?"

"Is that what you call them? I actually like that a lot better than geeks. Mind if I use that?

"Go ahead. I don't own it, someone else taught it to me."

"Thanks, but back on topic. I'm sure you didn't come over here just to ask about my relationship with the Dixons."

"No, I also wanted to get your opinion on how to break the news to Daryl. I figured you would know how to break the news best to him since you made a good point back there."

"When I nearly bit Amy's head off. Not my best moment but I know what it's like."

"Your sister right? The others kind of told me some of your story when you left. I get it, when I woke up all I could think about was finding my wife and son."

"Then you understand too. That need to know what happened no matter how much it could hurt you."

"But it can give you more happiness and gratefulness than you could ever imagine. Hell I came out of a coma and still found them, if there's hope for me then there's hope for you too." I see how much he believes that. I guess he still has hope because he hasn't been awake in this world long enough to lose it. I wish we could all feel that way again, and I hope he doesn't lose it anytime soon. Because the world still needs people like him.

"Rip it off like a band aid."

"Excuse me?" He quirks an eyebrow from my blunt and random statement.

"When you have to tell Daryl that Merle's dead get to the point. He may attack you so be on guard for that but if you drag it out he'll just be angrier."

"Merle's not dead. Not yet anyway." Wait what did he say? Surely I didn't hear what i thought I did.

"What are you talking about? You all said the place was swarming with walkers when you hauled your asses out of there."

"Well after you left T-Dog said how after he dropped the key he put a chain around the door so they couldn't get to Merle."

"So there's still hope he's alive. Although if I were in his place I wouldn't be hopeful. You think if someone were to go there in the morning they could get him?"

"That someone you?"

"I'm more capable than I look."

"I don't doubt that. That's quite a bump on the head you got but it seems like you walked it off."

"This, oh that was nothing. So if that's all your questions I'd recommend you go back to your family."

"I think you gave me enough for the night. Get some rest."

"I'd say the same to you but it sounds like you had a lot already." We chuckle at that before he goes off towards Lori's tent and I go back in mine. Tomorrow was going to be rough, I can already tell.

* * *

"Really? You guys couldn't wait until I woke up?"

Right before my eyes is a horrendous sight. Jim and Morales were striping down the Dodge for parts and Glenn looked absolutely heartbroken. I didn't blame him. That car was probably the most fun he had for a while and I really wanted to drive it too.

"Look at 'em. Vultures. Yeah, go on, strip it clean."

'Generators need every drop of fuel they can get. Got no power without it. Sorry, Glenn."

"Thought I'd get to drive it at least a few more days."

"At least you got to drive it. I didn't even get to use my shotgun I called out." I say as I drape an arm around his shoulders. Might as well be miserable together.

"Maybe we'll get to steal another one someday." Rick said and patted Glenn before going off to find his wife.

"What do you think are the chances of finding another car like this Nat?" Glenn asked.

"Um… If you're talking about one that hasn't been siphoned for gas or taken apart for a more sensible car I say slim. But you never know. Maybe it's out there now just waiting for you. Glenn come get me! Get inside of me!" I say the last part in a dramatic whisper and he starts to laugh.

"Okay stop that. Your being weird and making me uncomfortable. Did you really have to say the last part?"

"Oh come on, I need to be weird every once in a while or it be too depressing."

"Fair enough. And if there is a next time I do promise you have dibs to drive it after me. I owe you for all the times you leant me your car."

At that moment Shane drives up in his jeep.

"Water's here, y'all. Just a reminder to boil before use."

Glenn and I go to help grab the water. I see that Rick and Lori are talking about something serious. Trouble in paradise already? I put down the water when I hear a woman scream. Then I hear Carl and Sophia scream. I don't even hesitate before I start running towards the source with everyone else. I don't have a weapon though but I'll deal with that once I get there. I see the kids and a woman running from the other way. Lori embraces Carl and I go up to Sophia.

"You okay honey? Nothing hurt?"

"I'm fine." She says while sniffling. "I ran. It was eating the deer and I was scared it would eat me next."

A deer? That probably means that Daryl is somewhere nearby. But what was it eating the deer? Walkers haven't appeared around here for a long time, well except for when me and Daryl went hunting a long time ago but we were far away from the camp.

"Go find your mom. I'll go see if it's safe." She nods and I go see what the men found.

There was a deer alright. And it had to bolts sticking out of its hide but there was also a walker at it's neck. I watch with disgust as it tears into the flesh and the blood and guts fall out. What disturbs me the most though is that it doesn't look like a hiker. They were wearing slacks and business shoes, urban attire. So now they're moving out of the city. The guys circle around it with their weapons and when it gets up and lunges Rick strikes it and the rest of the men descend upon it and hit it. The only problem is no one is going for the head, the one place that so far has been the only way to truly kill a walker.

"Guys!" I shout but they are still beating it.

"Natalie get back!" I hear someone shout at me but I'm not listening.

"Guys the head!" I shout. Not long after that Dale takes his ax and decapitated it.

"Well that's one way to do it. Good job Dale." I say as I walk up to see the damage.

"It's the first one we've had up here. They never come this far up the mountain." He says ignoring my complement.

"Well, they're running out of food in the city, that's what." Jim says harshly. I cringe at that because food meant people.

I walk over to the deer. It was a female based on the lack of the horns. I ignore open neck and go to inspect the hide. I look at the orange and yellow wings on the end of them. They are definitely Daryl's bolts or they at least belong to someone with the same brand.

"Okay if this deer is here then that means Dixon's not far from here." I say to group.

Sure enough we hear a branch snapping and footsteps. Everyone gets their weapons ready and Shane has his gun pointed in the direction where the devil himself walks out and looks pissed when he sees his bounty was defiled by a walker.

"Oh, Jesus." I hear someone say.

"Get ready." I warn them about the tantrum that was about to come.

"Son of a bitch. That's my deer! Look at it. All gnawed on by this… filthy, disease-bearing, motherless poxy bastard!" he says and starts to kick the walker.

"Dixon it's dead. Well deader than it was anyway." I say to him.

"Calm down, son. That's not helping."

"What do you know about it, old man? Why don't you take that stupid hat and go back to "on golden pond"? I've been tracking this deer for miles." He walks over from the Walker and starts to pull his bolts out of the deer. I get up and take a couple of steps back to get out of the way. "Gonna drag it back to camp, cook us up some venison. What do you think? Do you think we can cut around this chewed up part right here?"

"I would not risk that."

"Not even if you had the strongest disinfectant and cooked it well done would I eat this deer." I say. Daryl sighs.

"That's a damn shame. I got some squirrel… about a dozen or so. That'll have to do. You're not getting out of skinning this time Falco." I sigh and I'm about to break the news about Merle when I hear a familiar snarl. I look over to see that head is still moving.

"Oh god." I hear Amy from a distance.

"Ugh, nasty little fucker just won't die." I say

"Come on, people. What the hell?" Daryl shoots it with one of his arrows. "It's gotta be the brain. Don't y'all know nothing?" he glances at me.

"What? Apparently I know nothing." He rolls his eyes at that and heads back to camp. I see Rick watch as Daryl walks away. "Yeah, you just met Daryl Rick."

"He always like that?"

"Believe it or not that's his charming side." I say and we start to walk back to camp following Daryl who was clueless about the news he was about to get.

"Merle! Merle! Get your ugly ass out here! I got us some squirrel! Let's stew 'em up."

"All right someone gonna tell him now? Or are we just going to let him search the camp until he figures it out himself?"

"I got it." Shane says and approaches him. "Daryl, just slow up a bit. I need to talk to you."

"About what?"

"About Merle. There was a… There was a problem in Atlanta."

He looks around to see everyone has a serious expression. Then he looks at me and tries to read my face, I guess I have a serious looking one too because he starts pacing and won't look anyone in the eye. His way of trying to hide his feelings.

"He dead?"

"We're not sure." Okay maybe Shane shouldn't be the one to do this.

"He either is or he ain't!"

"Rick!" I whisper to him to catch his attention. He understands immediately because he nods his head and walks forward.

"No easy way to say this, so I'll just say it."

"Who are you?"

"Daryl really, is that anyway to greet strangers?" I tease. Damn it why do I always get sarcastic during an awkward situation?

"Back off Falco! Now who are you?

"Rick Grimes."

"Rick Grimes, you got something you want to tell me?"

"Your brother was a danger to us all, so I handcuffed him on a roof, hooked him to a piece of metal. He's still there." Well glad to see someone takes my advice.

"Hold on. Let me process this." He makes some type of gesture to his head and keeps pacing. Not good. "You're saying you handcuffed my brother to a roof and you left him there?!"

"Yeah."

I swear right now Daryl turned into the big bad wolf because by the way he was huffing and puffing something was about to blow. He throws the squirrels at Rick but he dodges them, and Shane tackles Daryl.

"Really? Was that necessary?" I say to Glenn who's behind me. He just shrugs.

"Hey! Watch the knife!" I hear T-Dog shout and turn back around to see Daryl about to attack.

"HEY!" I shout and try to run but Morales grabs on to my arm to stop me.

"Don't Natalie." He says to me

Daryl pulls his knife out and slashes at Rick, but Rick moves out of the way and Shane is able to come up behind him and put him in a choke hold.

"You'd best let me go!"

"Nah, I think it's better if I don't." Shane says. I get out of Morales's grip and take some steps towards them.

"Come on Daryl. Think with your head. No one's going to let you go if you keep acting like this."

"Choke hold's illegal." He says to Shane. I sigh; of course that's what he thinks about.

"You can file a complaint. Come on, man. We'll keep this up all day."

"I'd like to have a calm discussion on this topic." Rick says to him. "Do you think we can manage that?" Daryl starts to turn purple. "Do you think we can manage that?"

"Come on Daryl." I say as calmly as I can. "Nothing is going to get fixed if you pass out from lack of oxygen."

He seems to calm down because Shane nods his head at Rick and then lets Daryl go. Daryl drops to the ground and tries to catch his breath.

"What I did was not on a whim." Rick says as he gets crouches down to Daryl's level "Your brother does not work and play well with others."

"It's not Rick's fault." T-Dog interrupts. I make a cut it out gesture by moving my hand across my throat but he keeps talking. "I had the key. I dropped it." I slap my forehead. We just got Daryl to calm down and now he has someone new to yell at.

"You couldn't pick it up?"

"Well, I dropped it in a drain."

A pained look crosses Daryl face. God I never thought I'd see him look so broken. It's making me upset seeing him like this. I want to help him but I know that it won't do anyone any good. Daryl isn't the type of person who needs to be coddled nor is he the type of person who wants it. So I just stay where I am and watch him pick himself up off the ground.

"If it's supposed to make me feel better, it don't."

"Well, maybe this will. Look, I chained the door to the roof… So the geeks couldn't get at him… With a padlock."

"It's gotta count for something." Rick says.

"He's still alive Daryl. Probably weak from dehydration but still alive." I say. I'm now standing close to Rick, it seems every time I talk I take a step closer to Daryl like I'm trying to approach a scared cat that's hissing at me. He's squinting and rubs his eyes, from the sun glare or tears I can't tell.

"Hell with all y'all! Just tell me where he is so that I can go get him."

"He'll show you. Isn't that right?" I hear Lori who is standing by the RV with the other women. I roll my eyes at her letting whatever drama she had with Rick interfere with what was happening.

"I'm going back." Rick says.

"Me too." I say.

"Why the hell do you care?" Daryl said and came up to get in my face. "Last I checked you hated him and got in a fight."

"I don't remember a fight Daryl, must have been before I hit my head. But it doesn't matter how I feel about him, no one deserves to die like that and if you forgot I also have a sibling out there so I know what you're going through."

He opens his mouth to say something but nothing comes out. He just mutters a whatever before he storms off. It's quiet for a while and then people start to leave and go back to what they were doing. I sigh and run my fingers through my hair. Dale and Glenn come up to me but I put my hand up before they can say anything.

"Don't… just don't. I know what you want to say but you can't stop me. I'm going no matter what, not just for Merle but for myself. I can still look for signs of my sister like I wanted to last time."

Dale lets out a sigh. "Why do you have to be so stubborn? Just be careful okay."

"Yeah what he said. Don't let Daryl get you hurt."

"I won't. I think he'll do more damage to himself than anyone else."

* * *

Daryl and I are waiting for Rick to get ready. I got my backpack with my bow and arrows, hunting knife, some energy bars and I have my throwing knives strapped around my waist. I changed into sturdier boots because I wore out my last pair, black jeans and a burgundy tank top and a denim vest. My hair was half up to make sure that it didn't get in my eyes. Daryl was doing a bolt count or something when Rick came storming up in his cop uniform with Shane on his tail talking about something.

"Could you just tell me why? Why would you risk your life for a douche bag like Merle Dixon?"

"Hey, choose your words more carefully." Daryl threatened. Oh crap not this again.

"No, I did. Douche bag's what I meant. Merle Dixon…The guy wouldn't give you a glass of water if you were dying of thirst.

"What he would or wouldn't do doesn't interest me." Rick intercepted the conversation."I can't let a man die of thirst… me. Thirst and exposure. We left him like an animal caught in a trap. That's no way for anything to die, let alone a human being." I'm starting to like Rick more and more. He's got a good sense of morality.

"So you Natalie and Daryl, that's your big plan?" Lori asked. It was more of an angry tone than a questioning one. Rick turns around to look at Glenn. I get the hint and look at Glenn in the same way.

"Oh, come on." Glenn says upset.

"Please Glenn. You and me like we originally planned before. Plus I need all the sane people we can get." I begged.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Daryl retorts from the fire pit.

"You know exactly what it means Dixon. Don't play dumb." I hear some snickers from nearby people. Thing is though I didn't mean to say it in a mocking way, I think Daryl is smarter than he makes himself out to be.

"Besides Glenn you know the way." Rick says. "You've been there before… In and out, no problem. You said so yourself. It's not fair of me to ask… I know that, but I'd feel a lot better with you along. I know Lori and Natalie would too."

"He's right Glenn." I agree with a faint smile. "I'd feel a whole lot better with you by my side."

"That's just great" Shane speaks up, god I can't wait to go now. "Now you're gonna risk four people, huh?"

"Five." T-Dog speaks up. Daryl huffs at that but keeps working on his bolt.

"My day just gets better and better, don't it?"

"You see anybody else here stepping up to save your brother's cracker ass?"

"Why you?"

"You wouldn't even begin to understand. You don't speak my language." I let out a sigh, okay time to speak up because I'm getting tired of all this bullshit.

"Guys really? Can we leave race out of this? The only people we should be fighting are Walkers and I don't even know if they count as people anymore!" I hear some hums of agreement from onlookers and T-Dog gives me a little nod but Daryl just huffs and mutters something about walkers not being people.

"That's five." Dale speaks up.

"It's not just five. You're putting every single one of us at risk. Just know that, Rick. Come on, you saw that Walker. It was here. It was in camp. They're moving out of the cities. They come back, we need every able body we've got. We need 'em here. We need 'em to protect camp."

"It seems to me what you really need most here are more guns."

"And just double the perimeter check or think of another spot to move to." I added but no one seemed to hear that, they were too focused on the guns.

"Right, the guns."

"Wait. What guns?

"Six shotguns, two high-powered rifles, over a dozen handguns. I cleaned out the cage back at the station before I left. I dropped the bag in Atlanta when I got swarmed. It's just sitting there on the street, waiting to be picked up."

"If no one else picked it up already." But once again I'm ignored as Shane and Rick talk about guns.

"Ammo?"

"700 rounds, assorted."

"I'm waiting by the truck." I say before heading over there.

I'm not a gun enthusiast and I think I'm done contributing to the conversation. I open the back and hop in. I pull out my arrows and start examining them. God what am I doing? If you told me months ago I'd be risking my life to go save a racist asshole I would have said you were nuts and that racists should be the first ones to go. Maybe I would have felt the same way if it wasn't for Daryl. If Merle was just another dumb racist who had no one left I wouldn't consider going there. But the fact that he has someone who cares about him and in his own way he cares about changes everything. And seeing Daryl break down, seeing him in pain when he thought his brother was dead, it hit me pretty hard. It was probably as close to seeing how I looked when I last heard Reese's voice and Atlanta was bombed. I'm lucky that I had this group to fall back on and take me in. And in his own way Daryl has been there for me since then. It might not be as prominent as some of the others and he didn't go out of his way to cheer me up when I was down (which I don't mind at all, I feel more guilty when people do that stuff) but he has been there for me. I hear the doors open and see Glenn and Daryl get in the truck.

"We going?" I asked them.

"Rick and T-Dog are just going to get to get some bolt cutters from Dale and then we're going." Glenn said. "Aren't you going to say goodbye to Amy and the others?"

"There's no time for that." Daryl speaks up before I can. "Once they get those cutters we're leaving."

"Thanks for making my decisions for me sweetie." I say sarcastically. "Anyway I said my goodbyes to them earlier but Amy still seems a little hurt I snapped at her last night."

"What happened to make the terrible twosome fight?" Daryl asked.

"It wasn't a fight. Just a disagreement." He got out of the passenger's seat and went to the back of the truck to see Rick and T-Dog talking to Dale. "Calm down Dixon. Dale's probably hesitant about handing out more tools since his belt was left on the roof. Once he gives in we'll be off in not time."

"It's still my brother's life that's on the line." He says and heads back to the front. "You still didn't answer my question? What went on between you and Amy?" I sigh.

"If you care so much fine, I wasn't too happy about how some people were being so lax about what happened to Merle so I may have taken a comment a bit harshly."

"It wasn't that bad Natalie." Glenn spoke up. "You had a point. Daryl did have a right to know everything that happened." Wow I thought women were supposed to be the big gossips.

"Right to know? They weren't going to tell me?" he asked getting mad again.

"Of course they were. It's just when Amy suggested to leave a few details out I called her out on it and asked if it were Andrea wouldn't she want to know everything that happened."

When I didn't get a response I look up to see him standing over me. He had this sort of confused look on his face. It's a face I'm getting used to anytime I don't say something sarcastic or flirty. I guess he still doesn't understand me and I still don't understand parts of him. Even though we've been out here for a long time I still don't know much about him other than what was on the surface.

"Why do you keep sticking up for me and Merle?" he asks.

"I keep telling you. I know what it's like to lose a family member… and… I don't know. I guess if it was me in your place I'd hope you'd do the same for me."

There's an awkward silence after that. He looks like he's fighting trying to say the first thing that comes out of his mouth, something he doesn't usually do a lot, and goes over to beep the horn. Poor Glenn tries to stop him but it doesn't work as Daryl kept beeping the horn.

"Come on! Let's go!" he shouts towards the others.

"Really? Was that really necessary? I ask.

"Worked, didn't it?" He gestured towards Rick and T-Dog who were coming over.

Rick got stopped by Shane who had a bag that he set down on the back of the truck and was digging through it. I tune out what they were saying to give them some privacy. Once Rick got in the passenger seat he started loading his gun and Daryl closed the back. Our rescue mission was officially underway.

* * *

We arrive outside the city. It was a mostly silent ride. I was sitting next to Daryl, T-Dog was on the other side of the truck and Glenn and Rick would occasionally check on us or talk to each other from time to time.

"He'd better be okay." Daryl said randomly. "It's my only word on the matter."

"I told you the geeks can't get at him. The only thing that's gonna get through that door is us." T-dog says back.

"Besides it's Merle. He's too stubborn to not be okay. If the grim reaper stood right in his face he'd tell him to go fuck himself and probably try to beat the crap out of him." I say. Daryl snorts at that, there was a slight smile on his face but it disappeared in a second. Glenn stops the truck.

"We walk from here." He calls out.

Daryl gets up and pulls up the door. He jumps out first with T-Dog and I following him. We walk along the train tracks and into the city. We cut through a fence when Rick turns to us.

"Merle first or guns?"

"Merle! We ain't even having this conversation." Daryl says.

"Hey this is a team effort lone wolf. You need to remember that." I scold him.

"We are having this conversation." Rick says and then he turns to Glenn. "You know the geography. It's your call."

"Merle's closest. The guns would mean doubling back. Merle first."

"Okay boys, let's stop gabbing and get going." I say and take the lead.

It was mostly uneventful except for taking out a walker or two before we get to the department store. It looks like a tornado hit it the way the items and broken glass are scattered on the floor. We hear something moving and freeze. Sure enough it's a walker. A woman with short dark hair wearing a denim jacket and a dress. Daryl's closet to her so he aims his crossbow at her and walks towards her. She looks up at him and starts snarling.

"Damn. You are one ugly skank." He says before he shoots her in the head. She falls to the ground and he goes to pull the bolt out of her head.

"That it?" I ask and look around the store.

"Seems like it." Rick answers back.

"Come on, where are the stairs?" Daryl asks impatiently.

"This way." Glenn says and leads us to the stairs. We open the door and I let out a grunt seeing all the stairs we'd have to climb.

"You okay?" T-Dog asks.

"Yeah, just missing the elevator right now."

"What you scared of stairs Falco? Can't be that out of shape, you're as thin as a railroad spike."

"Don't you have a brother to save?" I snap back at Daryl.

With that we climbed all the way up the stairs. Sure enough I felt winded halfway up but I didn't complain. Once we got towards the top that's when I got my second wind and we all hurried to towards the door. T-Dog cuts through the padlock and Daryl kicks open the door.

"Merle!" Daryl called out. "Merle!" he runs ahead. I'm at the very back behind Glenn making sure nothing followed us up here.

"No! No!" I hear Daryl cry out and turn around to see what he was staring at. My stomach dropped at the sight. I look over at the others to see they had my same reaction. No one saw this one coming. There on the ground was Dale's hacksaw and Merle's hand that he sawed out of the bloody handcuffs.

* * *

**And Tell it to the Frogs is done! Vatos is next! Wow it feels weird yet awesome to actually start writing with the show, I pretty much ran out of plots and fillers but I'm glad I was able to hold out long enough. As always feel free to favorite, follow and leave a review. I appreciate all of them and love feedback. **


	17. Vatos

**Hi guys! Wow you all have been awesome with the favoriting and following! It makes me afraid I'll have to do some serious typing to keep with my promise to post more than one if I reach a certain amount. But it is still appreciated very much and I get so happy when I get an alert about someone favoriting, following and reviewing. **

**Review Responses**

**Caysie: I'm really glad you're loving the relationship because sometimes I wonder if all over the place with it, or if it's going too fast or slow. And yes there will definitely be more smartassness from both of them! It's one of my favorite parts about their relationship (actually its one of my favorite parts about any fictional relationship).**

**SuicidalCupcake (now I have a strong craving for a cupcake lol): I'm glad you love it! As for Michonne I'm trying to stay true to the timeline in the show so it won't be until I get to season three. And she's one of my favorite characters too aside from Daryl and Glenn which makes me wish she was introduced sooner! First favorite female character because she's a badass and has some great witty lines. And don't worry about the rambling, look what I just did lol. I'll try to update as fast as I can :)**

**Kerry: Glad your luving the story :)**

* * *

Vatos

"No! No!" Daryl kept sobbing and calling out that word. Once he stopped shouting Rick and T-Dog went closer to inspect the damage, Daryl was still looking down at the scene in disbelief. The next thing I know I hear his crossbow click and he aims it at T-Dog and Rick holds up his gun to Daryl's head.

"Daryl Stop! This won't bring Merle back and the last thing we need is more people getting hurt!" I shout at him from my spot next to Glenn.

"She's right Daryl. I won't hesitate. I don't care if every walker in the city hears it." Although Daryl looks like he's about to pull the trigger he seems to listen to what Rick and I said and lowers his crossbow. I let out a sigh of relief when Rick lowers his gun. Daryl is still looking at T-Dog though and it gives me an uneasy feeling.

"You got a do-rag or something?" T-Dog looks just as confused as I feel about that question but he hands him one and Daryl walks over to picks up Merle's severed hand.

"Ugh really? Is that necessary?" I ask with a disgusted look on my face as Glenn and I join Rick and T-dog.

"I guess the saw blade was too dull for the handcuffs. Ain't that a bitch." He wraps the hand up like he's done it a thousand times before. I don't know if being a hunter desensitizes you from gross stuff like this but from where I'm standing this looks pretty messed up.

He gets up and gestures for Glenn to turn around. Knowing what he's about to do Glenn hesitantly moves and lets Daryl put the hand in his backpack. As much as I feel bad for Glenn, I'm just glad he didn't put it in my backpack.

"He must have used a tourniquet… maybe his belt. Be much more blood if he didn't."

Daryl notices a more blood and I see that it forms a trail. He starts to follow it and we follow him. T-Dog goes to get Dales tools and put them back. We enter a door that has a caution sign on it and I assume that it was a workers only area back in the day. With his crossbow at the ready Daryl enters first and we all follow his lead, Rick with his gun out and me with a throwing knife at the ready.

"Merle?" Daryl calls out. "You in here?"

No one responds as we walk down the stairs. We follow the blood trail to some offices in the building. The first one we check has a female walker in it that Daryl quickly disposes with his crossbow and then we check to see if the coast was clear. We walk down the hall towards a receptionist area and see two walkers already disposed of on the floor.

"Well it looks like Merle was here." I say as we see the bodies. Daryl nods his head at my statement.

"Had enough in him to take out these two sumbitches. One handed. Toughest asshole I ever met, my brother." He stops for a minute to reload his crossbow. "Feed him a hammer, he'd crap out nails."

"Thanks for the mental image." I deadpan and decide trade my throwing knife for my bow and arrow while I could.

"Any man can pass out from blood loss, no matter how tough he is." Rick said from beside us. He had a good point. As tough as Merle was he wasn't immortal. It's amazing he got farther than this point in his condition. And it's even more amazing that we still haven't found him yet, how long is this blood trail and how big is this building?

"Merle!"

"Daryl not so loud!" I say in a lower voice than his.

"We're not alone here. Remember?" Rick says taking my side

"Screw that. He could be bleeding out. You said so yourself."

We walk into a kitchen where a stove is still burning. There is a lot of blood and a belt is sitting on top of it. There is a faint burning smell in the air. Rick picks up something metal with a substance on it.

"What's that burned stuff?" Glenn asked.

"Skin. He cauterized the stump."

"Oh god." I gag at the thought.

"Told you he was tough." Daryl said. "Nobody can kill Merle but Merle."

"Don't take that on faith." Rick warned him. "He's lost a lot of blood."

"Yeah? Didn't stop him from busting out of this death trap." He says as he approaches the broken window. Merle must have smashed it open to get out of here. There a bloody rag next to some broken glass on the windowpane.

"He couldn't just use the stairs like a normal person?" I ask.

"Coming from the girl who was complaining about the stairs not too long ago."

"… fair enough." I mutter angry I didn't have a good comeback at the moment.

"He left the building? Why the hell would he do that?" Glenn asked.

"Why wouldn't he?" Daryl countered. "He's out there alone as far as he knows, doing what he's got to do. Surviving."

"You call that surviving?" T-Dog asks. "Just wandering out in the streets, maybe passing out? What are his odds out there?"

"No worse than being handcuffed and left to rot by you sorry pricks." Glenn and T-Dog look guilty when he says that.

"Daryl enough." I say. "They feel bad but it's done. You can't change the past so lets just move on."

"Easy for you to say. He's not your blood and you didn't leave him here so but out." He says to me before he starts talking to Rick. "You couldn't kill him. Ain't so worried about some dumb dead bastard."

"What about 1,000 dead dumb bastards?" Rick asks. "Different story?"

"Why don't you take a tally? Do what you want. I'm gonna go get him."

Before he can leave though Rick puts his arm out to push him back.

"Daryl, wait."

"Get your hands off me! You can't stop me."

Glenn looks at me and T-Dog during their argument and mouths something along the lines of he's crazy. I roll my eyes and mouth back I know. He is crazy but at the same time it's not all that different from how I react when it comes to my sister or how I reacted when I heard that Glenn and the others were stuck in here. So as much as I want to argue back with Daryl I feel like I can't without sounding like a hypocrite and he's probably just going to brush me off anyway. Maybe it'll sound better if it comes from Rick.

"I don't blame you." Rick says. "He's family, I get that. I went through hell to find mine. I know exactly how you feel. He can't get far with that injury. We could help you check a few blocks around but only if we keep a level head." I think Rick is some type of miracle worker. He seems to be able to talk his way through anything.

"…I could do that." Daryl finally agrees.

"Only if we get those guns first. I'm not strolling the streets of Atlanta with just my good intentions, okay?" T-Dog says. I hear a gurgling sound and before anyone can react I pull up my bow and shoot an arrow at the source. The lone walker falls to the ground as the arrow sinks into its head.

"How about we make a plan in a more secure room that doesn't smell like burning flesh?" I suggest.

"I think I'm with Natalie on this one." Glenn says.

* * *

"Glenn I'm not sure if I'm okay with this." I say when he reveals his plans to get the guns on his own. I'm sitting on top of one of the many desks in the office going over the plan while Glenn and T-Dog sit on the floor with a map they drew on the floor with a marker, Rick stands and Daryl leans against a desk.

"She's right Glenn. You're not doing this alone." Rick says.

"Even I think it's a bad idea and I don't even like you much." Daryl speaks up.

"Don't take it personally Glenn. This is the first I've heard him admit he's capable of liking people." I look over to see Daryl flip me off.

"It's a good idea, okay, if you just hear me out." Glenn says gaining our attention. I should probably try to get better control over my sarcasm. "If we go out there in a group, we're slow, drawing attention. If I'm alone, I can move fast."

"I still need to be convinced before I let you run into a possible death trap."

"Look." He moves a paper clip on the map "That's the tank, five blocks from where we are now." He puts a folded piece of paper next to it. "That's the bag of guns. Here's the alley I dragged you into when we first met. That's where Daryl, Natalie and I will go.

"Why me?" Daryl asks.

"Why us? I thought we'd be the last pair you'd want with you."

"Your crossbow and your bow are quieter than his gun. While Daryl and Natalie wait here in the alley, hopefully behaving." He gives me a look. I raise my hands up in defense.

"I'll be on my best behavior."

"I can't make any promises." Daryl says.

"Fair enough. While they wait here I run up the street, grab the bag."

"You got us elsewhere?" Rick asks. Glenn points down the street.

"You and T-Dog, right. You'll be in this alley here."

"Two blocks away? Why?"

"You two are the backup plan. Right Glenn?" I say as I catch on to his plan.

"Exactly. I may not be able to come back the same way. Walkers might cut me off. If that happens, I won't go back to Daryl and Natalie. I'll go forward instead, all the way around to that alley where you guys are. Whichever direction I go, I got you in both places to cover me. Afterwards, we'll all meet back here."

"Hey, kid, what'd you do before all this?" Daryl asked.

"Delivered pizzas. Why?" Glenn asked. I stifle a laugh at seeing Rick and Daryl's reaction to that. To be fair though Glenn worked hard and he was the best pizza delivery boy.

"Okay, let's do this while I still have faith in this plan." I say as I slide off the desk.

* * *

We climb down the ladder into the alleyway. Glenn &amp; Daryl go down the ladder first and I find them waiting for me before we run down the alley. Glenn takes the lead, Daryl follows behind him with his crossbow up and I'm at the end with armed with my bow. We hide behind a dumpster while Daryl loads his crossbow.

"You got this Glenn?" I ask again. I should know by now that Glenn is more than capable but that doesn't stop this bad feeling in my stomach that something is going to go wrong.

"Yeah, I got it."

"You got some balls for a Chinaman." Daryl says as he loads his crossbow.

"I'm Korean." Glenn says.

"Whatever." I roll my eyes at their banter.

"Now is not the time for this." I say and motion for Glenn to go forward.

Glenn runs down the street while Daryl and I crouch behind the trash cans. I hear someone coming, it doesn't sound like a walker though. It sounds like someone sneaking around. I tap Daryl's shoulder and motion for him to check behind the dumpster since he's at the edge. He spots someone and he gets up really fast pointing his crossbow at him.

"Whoa, don't shoot me! What do you want?" He's a young man, he could be anywhere between late teens to early twenties.

"Keep your voice down. We're not alone out here." I say looking at the walkers but keeping my weapon pointed at him.

"I'm looking for my brother." Daryl says. "He's hurt real bad. You seen him?"

"Daryl now isn't the time!" I whisper to him. We need to focus on Glenn.

"When will it be?" he shouts back at me. I don't respond though, I keep looking back and forth between the young man and the gate where Glenn should come back.

"Ayúdame!" the young man shouts. Oh shit! Spanish may not have been my strongest subject but I knew the word help.

"Shut up! You're gonna bring the geeks down on us. Answer me."

"Dixon! I don't think he's alone!" I shout at him but he doesn't listen. I go to the gate to look out for Glenn.

"Answer me."

"Ayúdame! Ayúdame! Ayúdame!"

Oh shit! Someone is definitely going to hear. I wouldn't be surprised if Rick and T-Dog could hear it from two blocks away. The walkers or whoever he was calling for help were going to show up soon but I don't want to leave Glenn. I hear the sound of skin hitting skin and turn my head to see Daryl punched the guy and was trying to muffle his cries for help.

"Shut up. Shut up."

"Daryl! I don't think that's gonna-ugh!" I'm pushed to the ground. I land on my hands and look up to see two guys running towards Daryl and the kid. One of them had a baseball bat. The one in front kicked Daryl and he rolled the side with a grunt.

"Daryl!" I shout and get up to run towards the guys who were starting to beat him up. I sling my bow on my back and kick out at the back of the one guy's leg. He howls out in pain and turns around to grab me but I punch him. He stumbles back grabbing his chin and muttering swear words the other guy comes at me with the bat but I grab it before it could hit me and knee him in the gut.

"Come on! Get up!" I shout but the guy from earlier grabs me by hair and slams me down on the ground. I let out a cry as I feel them stomp on me.

"Get off her!" I hear Daryl shout and he tackles the heavier looking guy. They wrestle for a little bit before the guy with the bat hits Daryl in the head. I try to push myself up but the bat guy is faster and kicks me down.

"Natalie!" I hear Glenn cry out.

"Glenn run!" I shout but I'm kicked in the mouth.

"That's it. That's the bag, Vato. Take it! Take it!"

They start to run towards him and try to grab the bag of guns. My head is still spinning from the last kick and my mouth is numb. I'm pretty sure I'm bleeding but that doesn't matter because they just knocked out Glenn and are going for the guns. I reach for a knife but Daryl beats me to it and shoots the one guy in the rear end. I smirk as he cries out in pain and throw my knife at the other guy. It grazes him in the ear and he cries out in pain as I run to grab the bag and get Glenn out of there. I have the bag in my grip and I'm about to grab Glenn when the guy with the bat strikes me in the head.

"No!"

"Natalie!" I hear Glenn and Daryl call out. I fall so that the guns are under me. I see the one guy is about to reach out for me but Glenn slams his body into him to prevent it. The bat guy takes advantage of the situation and grabs Glenn.

"Get off me! Get off me! Daryl! Daryl! Help us!" he shouts.

"Let… go… of him!" I try to shout but my head is ringing and hurting like crazy from the hit.

I lift my head just in time to see a car pull up and they start to make their way towards it. Walkers are trying to get to them but one of them is taken out before they can take a bite out of them. With no guns, but Glenn as a hostage, they speed off leaving behind the young guy. Daryl runs up to the gate but he's too late as the car disappears.

"Come back here, you sumbitches!" his yell attracts the walkers and he has to close the gate before they can get us. "You okay Nat?" he asks me as he bends down to my level.

"I'll be fine. They got Glenn!" I say trying to get up but he grabs me by the shoulders and leads me to dumpsters to take a seat while he goes after the boy who is using the dumpster to stand up. Rick and T-Dog show up in time to stop him though. If only they were here for Glenn.

"Whoa whoa whoa. Stop it." Rick pushes back Daryl who was about to beat the crap out of the kid. Said kid was being held up against the wall by T-Dog.

"I'm gonna kick your nuts up in your throat!"

"Let me go." He shouts obviously scared by Daryl's threat.

"Don't!" I shout at them. "Don't let him go!"

"They took Glenn." Daryl said. "That little bastard and his little bastard homie friends. I'm gonna stomp your ass!"

"Guys! Guys! We're cut off!" T-Dog says pointing to the Walkers who have now lined up along the fence looking like a dangerous barricade. I get up forgetting about the bag of guns, I know they were the mission but I honestly could care less about them. I'm more worried about Glenn.

"Get to the lab. Go." Rick says to T-Dog, then he looks at me and gestures for me to move forward. I try to go as fast as I could but I couldn't go too fast without almost falling.

"You okay?" he asks me. I just nod my head.

"Go with T-Dog, I'll get the guns." He tells me. I nod my head again but regret it instantly because it feels like a thousand bombs are exploding in my head, it prevents me from walking in a straight line.

"Come on. Damn, let's go."

I look back to see Daryl telling Rick to hurry up as grabs the guns and a hat that Glenn must have picked up. It looks like a sheriff's hat. I guess Rick lost it at the same time he lost the guns but I don't see how it's important. They start to run towards me and I wait for them. Rick passes me and Daryl grabs my arm and starts leading me back to the lab. We run through the alley and it sounds like we run past a few walkers before we see T-Dog holding the door open for us as we run in. The door slams shut and we all catch our breath.

"Everyone okay?" Rick asks. We all let out grunts so I guess no one got hurt really badly.

"Where's the kid?" I ask.

"Left him in the lab room. Don't worry, I made sure to lock it behind me so he couldn't get out."

"Actually thinking this time?" Daryl asked.

"Daryl not now. We need to go see where they took Glenn." My head has now decided to move on from explosive pain to throbbing pain in one area. "And I want to give that guy with the bat a piece of my mind. Or whatever is left of it after that blow to the head." I say as I follow Rick and T-Dog to where our hostage is being stored. Daryl didn't make a snide comment for once. When we walk into the room we see the guy sitting on a chair. He gave a glance at us before averting his eyes. We gather around him and let Rick take control of the interrogation, as a cop he would have the most experience with this type of stuff. It turns out his name is Miguel.

"Those men you were with, we need to know where they went."

"I ain't telling you nothing." He says.

"Oh now you're a tough guy?" I question with disdain in my voice. "Out there you looked like you were about to shit your pants and all my friend here did was ask you a question." I say and feel blood run down my chin so I go to wipe it off. Okay now my mouth was starting to hurt like hell.

"Jesus, man. What the hell happened back there?" T-Dog says as he takes in my appearance.

"I told you, this little turd and his douche bag friends came out of nowhere, jumped me and beat the crap out of Falco."

"Hey, is that really the thanks I get for getting those guys off you?"

"You're the one who jumped me, puto." Miguel spoke up. "left his girl to keep watch while he's screaming about trying to find his brother like it's my damn fault."

"Not his girl." I blurt out. But it doesn't matter and no one but me seemed to hear that part.

"They took Glenn. Could have taken Merle too."

"Merle? What kind of hick name is that? I wouldn't name my dog merle."

I chuckle a little bit at that. I know it's a bad time but hey the kid had a point. It would never occur to me to name anyone or anything Merle. Daryl however didn't find that as amusing as I did though. He looks really pissed off and goes to kick the kid but Rick holds him back. Okay obviously Daryl has never been to anger management a day in his life, or maybe he did and got kicked out. Either way I wouldn't be surprised.

"Damn it, Daryl. Back off."

He does but only to go to Glenn's backpack. He pulls out T-Dog's do-rag and I immediately know where this is going.

"Want to see what happened to the last guy that pissed me off?" he throws it at Miguel who starts freaking out and gets out of the chair to back away. Well it's certainly not the first time someone freaked out about having Merle's hands, or in this case hand, on them. Daryl goes up to Miguel who is now cowering on the floor and grabs him by the sweaty tank top he's wearing.

"Start with the feet this time." Rick goes to pull him off and I step up to restrain Daryl. We were wasting time with this tough guy shit and it was getting us nowhere.

"Look I know in your own sick twisted way you're trying to help but he's not some terrorist who needs all sorts of torture to make him talk. He's just a punk ass kid trying to act tough. Just let Rick handle this one and we'll get Glenn back." Rick nods his head in thanks as I get Daryl to back off and goes to talk to Miguel.

"The men you were with took our friend. All we want to do is talk to them, see if we can work something out." Sure enough officer charming has the kid talking in no time.

* * *

We arrive outside the warehouse where Miguel said the two guys were taking Glenn. We were hiding behind a brick wall with some broken windows scoping out the place and going over the plan. T-Dog would be up on the roof with a sniper rifle while Rick, Daryl and I offer up Miguel in exchange for Glenn with our weapons drawn.

"You sure you're up for this?" Rick asks T-Dog.

"Yeah."

"You?" he asks me.

"You know it. The sooner we get Glenn back the better."

"Okay."

T-Dog leaves carrying the bag of guns to take his place up on the roof. I offered to go with him but he said he'd feel less pressure if I wasn't up there with him. I didn't argue with him on that one, if he's handling a gun he needs to feel as comfortable as possible. I turn my gaze on Miguel who is sitting on the grass being watched by Daryl.

"One wrong move, you get an arrow in the ass. Just so you know." He warns Miguel.

"G's gonna take that arrow out of my ass and shove it up yours. Just so you know."

"As lovely of an image that is can we talk about something other than asses?" I ask rolling my eyes at their banter. When Miguel's eyes start to wander towards my body Daryl slaps him upside the head. Guess the kid hasn't seen to many girls for a while.

"G? Who's G?" Rick asks.

"Guillermo. He's the man here."

"Okay then. Let's go see Guillermo."

He motions for us to start moving. We walk up with Rick in the lead, me behind him with my bow at the ready, Miguel behind me and Daryl with his crossbow in the back making sure Miguel behaves. I push Miguel towards Rick who then pushes him in front and he raises his gun as we head towards the door. The door opens up and the man I assume to be Guillermo walks out

"You okay, little man?" he asks Miguel.

"They're gonna cut off my feet, carnal."

"Cops do that?"

"Not him. This redneck puto here. He cut off some dude's hand, man. He showed it to me."

"Shut up." Daryl says.

At that moment one of the guys from the ambush comes out and he's pointing a gun at Daryl. I draw my arrow back further as a warning while Daryl adjusts his crossbow.

"Hey, that's that Vato right there, homes. He shot me in the ass with an arrow. What's up, homes, huh?"

"Wouldn't have had to do it if you didn't attack us." I counter back. He aims the gun at me.

"Don't think I forgot about you! Cut Jorge's ear with a knife! Should have stayed on the ground, would have been left alone if you hadn't attacked me."

"Chill, ese, chill. Chill. This true? He wants Miguelito's feet? That's pretty sick, man."

"We were hoping more for a calm discussion." Rick says

"That hillbilly jumps Felipe's little cousin, beats on him, threatens to cut off his feet, Felipe and Jorge are attacked by the girl, Felipe gets an arrow in the ass, and you want a calm discussion? You fascinate me."

"Heat of the moment. Mistakes were made on both sides."

"Who are these people to you anyway? You don't look related. Who's the girl belong to?"

"Do you really want to call the girl with and arrow pointed at your head someone's property? Because that has to be one of the dumbest things I have ever heard of." I say.

"They are two of our group, more or less. I'm sure you have a few like them."

"You got my brother in there?" Daryl asks.

"Sorry, we're fresh out of white boys. But I've got Asian. You interested?"

"Yeah we're taking him back immediately." I say sternly but Rick gives me a look to calm down and begrudgingly I back off a little.

"I have one of yours, you have one of mine. Sounds like an even trade."

"Don't sound even to me." My fingers tighten on the arrow and I wonder how if I can hold out much longer.

"G. Come on, man." Miguel begs but G isn't having it.

"My people got attacked. Where's the compensation for their pain and suffering?"

"Last time I checked we got attacked too. My friends got punched, kicked and I got smashed by a bat in the head so I think we're even."

"Normally I'm against hitting women but from what Felipe and Jorge told me you attacked them and they acted in self-defense. More to the point, where's my bag of guns?"

"Guns?" Rick questioned.

"The bag Miguel saw in the street. The bag Felipe and Jorge were going back to get. That bag of guns."

"You're mistaken."

"I don't think so."

"About it being yours. It's my bag of guns."

"The bag was in the street. Anybody could come around and say it was theirs. I'm supposed to take your word?

"He's a cop. I'm sure if he had a bag of guns it would have a label on it that said property of Atlanta P.D or something like that." I try to rationalize but it comes off as somewhat sarcastic.

"Drop the attitude. What's to stop my people from unloading on you right here and now and I take what's mine?"

"You could do that. Or not." Rick says and indicates to the wall where T-Dog has the sniper rifle pointed at Guillermo.

"Oye." Guillermo calls out and two men appear on the roof. They are dragging someone tied up with a bag over their head. I already know it's Glenn before they take it off and let out a hiss, it was the only thing I could do to stop myself from saying something that would land us in deeper shit.

"I see two options. You come back with Miguel and my bag of guns, everybody walks. Or you come back locked and loaded, we'll see which side spills more blood."

I watch with anger as they head back into the building and the men on the roof disappear with Glenn. I know what I want to do, but I don't know if everyone else would agree.

* * *

Rick unzips the bag of guns and starts to divide them up.

"Them guns are worth more than gold." Daryl said. "Gold won't protect your family or put food on the table. You're gonna give that up for that kid?"

"That kid has a name." I say. "and he's been a friend and ally to the group. I think he deserves a little more concern."

"If I knew we'd get Glenn back, I might agree." T-Dog said "But you think that Vato across the way is just gonna hand him over?"

"You calling G a liar?" Miguel said from where he was sitting on the floor.

"Are you a part of this? You want to hold onto your teeth?" Daryl slaps him and this time I let him. I'm getting tired of lugging this punk around, especially after seeing Glenn looking so helpless.

"Question is, do you trust that man's word?" T-Dog asks.

"No, question is what are you willing to bet on it?" Daryl speaks up. "Could be more than them guns. Could be your life. Glenn worth that to you?"

"Look my word might not count for much and I know everyone is going to think I'm crazy but I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get Glenn back. I may not trust that guys' word but Glenn is my friend, a good person and he always has your back no matter what. I don't expect you to side with me Rick but I just want you to know whatever you decide I'm still doing whatever it takes to get Glenn because he'd do the same for me and I am tired of losing people I care about without being able to do anything." I say all that to him without breaking eye contact. I don't care right now about anyone else's reaction other than Rick's. I see a mutual understanding in his eyes as he divides up the guns and puts one in his holster.

"I get it Natalie. What life I have I owe to him. I was nobody to Glenn, just some idiot stuck in a tank. He could have walked away, but he didn't. Neither will I."

"So you're gonna hand the guns over?" Daryl asked. God I'm sick of hearing about these guns! I understand they are helpful but I do not value them over a human life.

"I didn't say that. There's nothing keeping you two here." He gestures to Daryl and T-Dog. You should get out, head back to camp."

"And tell your family what?" T-Dog asks. There's a silence in the room after that. Rick looks at T-Dog who looks hesitant at first but then agrees to come along. Rick and I turn to look at Daryl. It takes almost a minute but soon he nods his head and Rick starts handing out the guns.

"Can you handle this Natalie?" he asks as he hands me a long one. I'm hesitant at first but I nod my head and take it.

"I'm a fast learner."

"Come on, this is nuts." Miguel tries to get up but Daryl pushes him back down. "Just do like G says."

We start loading up the ammo and grabbing smaller guns to take with us. I feel a hand on my arm and look up to see Daryl giving me a questioning look.

"Can't talk me out of this one." I say.

"Can't talk you outta anything, stubborn as a mule. But you still need to know how to use that rifle without dislocating your shoulder." He says and shows me how to load ammo the right way and how to hold my rifle. After some awkward adjustments to my form he deems me ready and goes to tie and gag Miguel.

* * *

When arrive back we're greeted by Guillermo and his gang. There were a lot more people than I imagined there were be. A lot of them were armed with guns or baseball bats so if things do go badly then all hell is going to break loose. But I can't think like that. I need to stay alert and calm for this to work, especially since I'm holding this very powerful weapon.

"I see my guns but they're not all in the bag." Guillermo says.

"That's because they're not yours. I thought I mentioned that." Rick says back.

"Let's just shoot these fools right now, ese. All right? Unload on their asses, ese." The one called Felipe says to Guillermo. I keep a steady aim at him but Guillermo doesn't give a signal to shoot us yet.

"I don't think you fully appreciate the gravity of the situation."

"No, I'm pretty clear." Rick cuts Miguel free and hands him over.

"You have your man. I want mine." I don't see Glenn anywhere. I want to ask where he is but before we got here we all agreed to let Rick handle it.

"I'm gonna chop up your boy. I'm gonna feed him to my dogs. They're the evilest, nastiest man-eating bitches you ever saw. I picked them up from Satan at a yard sale. I told you how it has to be. Are you woefully deaf?"

"No, my hearing's fine. You said come locked and loaded."

We all cock our guns at that and Rick points his gun at Guillermo. Guillermo's guys get ready to attack us.

"Okay then, we're here." It feels like time has stopped as we stare down at them. No one makes a move and no one says anything. My heart is racing, it sounds so loud I swear that everyone could probably hear it.

"Felipe! Felipe!" We turn our guns towards the voice. Suddenly, an old woman comes out from behind the group. I tilt my head in confusion but don't lower my gun.

"Abuela, go back with the others… now." Felipe tells her. Others? But she doesn't listen to them and keeps coming forward.

"Get that old lady out of the line of fire!" Daryl shouts.

"How about why is she in the line of fire to begin with?" I ask, is no one else curious about why she's here?

"Abuela, listen to your mijo, okay?" Guillermo tells her. "This is the not the place for you right now."

"Mr. Gilbert is having trouble breathing. He needs his asthma stuff. Carlitos didn't find it. He needs his medicine." She sounds upset so it must be serious. Okay I'm getting more and more confused each second.

"Felipe, go take care of it, okay? And take your grandmother with you."

"Abuela! Ven conmigo por favor." But she doesn't listen to him. She continues to come forward.

"Who are those men and girl?"

"Por favor, ven conmigo."

I lower my gun as she comes forward. Moving towards Rick.

"Don't you take him."

"Ma'am?"

"Felipe's a good boy. He has his trouble but he pulls himself together. We need him here." She thought Rick was here to arrest her grandson. I wonder if she's all there mentally. Does she know about what's out there and arresting people is the last thing on everyone's priority list? I look over at him to see that he had the same realization as me.

"Ma'am, I'm not here to arrest your grandson."

"Then what do you want him for?"

"He's… Helping us find a missing person. Fella named Glenn."

"The Asian boy?"

"Yes he's a friend of ours." I say warmly, she gives me a smile in return.

"He's with Mr. Gilbert. Come. Come, I'll show you." She grabs Rick hand motions for me to follow. "He needs his medicine." I look back to see that Daryl and T-Dog haven't moved yet, the other guys won't let them by without permission.

Guillermo lets out a sigh. "Let 'em pass".

The Vatos let them pass. Daryl is still on guard as he moves through them and T-Dog is not far behind them. Felipe and two other guys follow us make sure we don't anything. We pass through some court yards with a few people in them gardening, up some stairs and into a building that appears to be a nursing home or some type of hospital. I shiver a bit as I go inside and see the sick patients.

"Abuela, por favor. Take me to him." Felipe says and follows his grandmother. I guess they are protecting and taking care of the people who lived here. Daryl comes up beside me and notices my discomfort as we move down the hall.

"What? You scared of hospitals or some shit?"

"Hospitals aren't exactly happy places Daryl. Too many bad memories." I say seriously looking into some of the rooms and getting more depressed. He gives me a look but he can't question me anymore as we reach the end of the hall and enter a big room with tables and a stage. There are people crowding around an old man who Felipe is helping.

"All right. All right. Nice and easy. Just breathe. Just breathe. Just let it out. Just breathe. Just relax." I look around and see Glenn is one of the people in the huddle. I let out a sigh of relief when I see him.

"Thank god." The others look to see Glenn and we go up to see him.

"What the hell is this?" Rick asks him.

"An asthma attack. Couldn't get his breath all of a sudden."

"That's not what he meant Glenn. We thought you were in danger." I say

"I thought you were being eaten by dogs, man." T-Dog says. He turns his head and we see three little Chihuahuas on the bed. One lets out a bark at us. Cute but not exactly what you picture when someone says he picked them up from Satan's yard sale.

"You know Guillermo, when you said Satan's yard sale I pictured big Dobermans or Rottweilers. Not these little noisy guys." I say looking at the dogs.

"Could I have a word with you?" Rick asks Guillermo and leads him away. "You're the dumbest son of a bitch I ever met. We walked in there ready to kill every last one of you."

"Well, I'm glad it didn't go down that way."

"If it had, that blood would be on my hands."

"Mine too. We'd have fought back. Wouldn't be the first time we've had to. Protect the food, the medicine… what's left of it. These people, the old ones… the staff took off, just left 'em here to die. Me and Felipe were the only ones who stayed." I look around and see all the people in here. None of the other staff formed a close enough connection to care about them?

"What are you, doctors?"

"Felipe's a nurse… a special care provider. Me, I'm the custodian." He gestures for us to follow him into a more private room.

"What about the rest of your crew?"

"The Vatos trickle in to check on their parents, their grandparents. They see how things are and most decide to stay. It's a good thing too. We need the muscle. The people we've encountered since things fell apart, the worst kind… plunderers, the kind that take by force."

"That's not who we are."

"How was I to know? My people got attacked and you show up with Miguel hostage… appearances." I guess if you can look at it from both sides it was a misunderstanding, caused by a want for a bag of guns left in the street.

"Guess the world changed." T-Dog said. I frown, it didn't that much. We just can't ignore it anymore.

"No. It's the same as it ever was. The weak get taken. So we do what we can here. The Vatos work on those cars, talk about getting the old people out of the city. But most can't even get to the bathroom by themselves, still, it keeps the crew busy, and that's worth something. So we barred all the windows, welded all the doors shut except for one entrance. The Vatos, they go out, scavenge what they can to keep us going. We watch the perimeter night and day and we wait. The people here, they all look to me now. I don't even know why."

"Because they can."

Rick hands Guillermo his shotgun and starts to go through the rest of the guns to divide them up between the two of groups.

* * *

We left the nursing home after dividing up the guns, although the guys did let me take advantage of the situation and question people about the types of groups that went by. No one could give me exact details that would confirm whether my sister was one of them but some of the guys did say that there was a group not too long ago that talked about looking at possible shelters outside the city. There were guys and girls of all ages so there's a chance that she could have been one of the people. I even asked about Merle but no one saw a white guy with one hand run by, that upset Daryl but he was already pretty pissed at Rick for handing out the guns. We were now in the train yard walking back to the truck.

"Admit it, you only came back to Atlanta for the hat."

"Don't tell anybody." Rick and Glenn joke with each other.

"You're the third craziest son of a bitch I ever met Grimes." I say shaking my head at the two of them.

"Third?" he asks.

"You've given away half our guns and ammo." Daryl said bitterly

"Not nearly half." Rick said catching my eyes and realizing who I was talking about.

"It's done Dixon. Stop mopping over it. We gave them away."

"For what? Bunch of old farts who are gonna die off momentarily anyhow? Seriously, how long you think they got?"

"How long do any of us?" Rick says.

"Rick's right. We're lucky just to wake up in the morning… Guys, isn't this where we left the van?"

We come to the gates but there is no truck in sight.

"Oh my God." Glenn says.

"Where the hell's our van?" Daryl asks.

"Please tell me you didn't leave the key in the ignition." I look over at Glenn who's still in shock. Damn it!

"We left it right there. Who would take it?" Glenn asked even though the answer seemed pretty obvious.

"Merle." Rick growled.

"He's gonna be taking some vengeance back to camp." Daryl said.

"That's why he's the craziest son of a bitch I ever met. We better get going." I say. I don't know what I'm more upset about. The fact that Merle may have stolen a truck and is causing trouble at the camp or that we have to walk all the way back to camp. Either way I'm going to punch that son of a bitch so hard next time I see him.

* * *

"So they didn't see your sister?" Glenn asked me on the way back.

"No but they said that they heard some people checking out shelters outside the city. I think they said something about the CDC and Fort Benning."

"Well I'm sorry this trip was a bust. We didn't find Merle or your sister. Just got half a bag of guns and saving me."

"It wasn't a bust and don't sell yourself short Glenn. We weren't leaving without you." I say to him.

"Thanks. But I know it probably took some convincing for everyone to get involved."

"Rick was all about saving you to repay you for saving him. T-Dog wasn't sure if Guillermo would keep his word but you know his heart is in the right place."

"And Daryl? I know he'd rather have a bag of guns than me. He made that pretty obvious."

"Well…" I look ahead to see if he heard us but seems pretty oblivious. "Okay we all know he's not the most polite guy. I call him out on it a lot. But I do think there's a part of him that wants to help; he's just really closed off and lets his temper take control."

"I don't get it."

"Get what?"

"You and him. One minute you guys are arguing and teasing each other yet you have each other's backs in fights and you defend him in conversations. Is there something more going on between you?" he asks.

"Why do people keep assuming I'm hooking up with someone? To answer your question no, there's nothing going on. I can't really describe it either. I do respect him in some way and I guess he's somewhat of a friend. Based on all the times I've acted like a smart ass to him and he still puts up with me shows that we don't hate each other." He laughs at that.

"Yeah I don't think anyone else can get away with half of the things you say to him. Were you always like that with him?"

"Not really. At first it was only here and there otherwise I just treated him normally and like everyone else even though he was an antisocial ass most of the time. Then I guess after hanging out with him a couple times and him teaching me how to fight with weapons I just got more comfortable saying that stuff to him." I look ahead to see Rick waving us forward. I guess we were getting close to camp.

"Come on, I think we're going to have to make a run for it." Glenn says and we start running.

It's later than I realized because the sky is black and is only illuminated by all the shining stars. As we get closer to the camp I hear gunshots and screaming. I don't have any personal experience but it sounds like a war broke out. My mind races about all the things that could be happening but there is one scenario I ruled out. It wasn't Merle, there's no way all this would be over Merle. Then I remember the walker that was eating the deer earlier and how Jim said they were running out of food in the city.

"No…" I whisper when I realize what's happening.

"Oh my God." I hear Rick say.

"Go! Go!" Someone shouts and we don't hesitate.

We start running faster than before, holding our guns and getting ready to help out however we can. It feels like I'm not going fast enough though, every agonizing fearful scream is reminding me that I'm not getting there fast enough to help them. I'm taken back to the dream I had while back, where I come out of my tent to find out we were being ambushed. I pushed that to the back of my mind for so long but now it feels like it's hitting me like a ton of bricks. I can't let that happen, all those people who died in that dream can't die now. And just like that we arrive at the camp, I waste no time shooting my gun at any walker I see. The hoard of them was coming towards us because the gunfire was attracting them. I lose count after killing three before one gets so close that I have to kick out at its leg and start beating it's head with the barrel of my gun. Something I see Daryl and T-Dog also resorted to doing while Rick went to his family. Once my walker no longer moves I take deep breath and realize that the gunfire has stopped. All I hear now are people crying and calling out for their loved ones. I look around the camp and see all the bodies on the ground, most were walkers and the people whose names I could never remember. Every time I scan a body I feel fear that it's someone I know but then feel relieved when I discover it isn't, something I'll regret later. I look around to see Morales with his family, Carol with Sophia, Dale, Jim, Jacqui, Shane, Rick, Lori, Carl, T-Dog, Daryl and Glenn. But then something catches my eye at the RV. A blonde woman kneeling on the ground crying over a body. I walk towards them and let out a cry before covering my mouth with my hand. It's Andrea kneeling over Amy who is covered in blood. I feel tears fall down my face, so warm that it feels like they might burn my face.

"No…no…no." I mutter to myself looking at the sight of my friend who was bleeding out on the ground. My friend that I didn't even properly say goodbye to today because of what feels like a completely useless argument we had. I feel someone come over to my side but don't look at them. I can't look away from what is happening.

"Oh shit… Natalie..." They say but I don't listen. I feel like I can't move any of my limbs. They let out a sigh and move a little closer putting a hand on my shoulder. I look up to see it's Daryl. "Don't look… you shouldn't have to see this." He says.

"We should have moved… when… when that walker…" I try to say but my voice cracks. Daryl looks uncomfortable and like he wants to leave but he doesn't. He just stands next to me and lets me cry.

"No!" I hear Andrea call out. "Amy! Amy! Amy!"

I sob harder now, flashing back to my sister holding me as I was bleeding out in the kitchen. She's crying and scared out of her mind that she's going to lose me, and now I'm seeing it happen again between Andrea and Amy. It's hard to believe that she's really gone. We've been up here for so long that it felt like we were completely safe. That the walkers were almost like a dream and something you only have to worry about if you left the quarry. How could we have been so foolish, so oblivious to believe we could stay here for so long without any trouble? How could I be foolish enough to get attached to people when they could be ripped away any second when I've tried all my life not to? I see Daryl tense as Andrea cries louder and I sob harder. I try to calm myself so that I'm only crying silently.

"I'm fine… I'll be fine." I say more to convince myself than him. He gives me as I wipe the tears away from my eyes but he doesn't question me.

"I'll check to see if there's more." He said. "or if we can do something about the bodies. They'll come back if they were bitten… think you can help?"

"Yeah... I'll just want to check on Dale and the others before I do anything."I say numbly. It may sound cold of me but I can't do anything to help Amy or break down in front of everyone so his offer was a welcome distraction for me. He nods his head and goes to check with Rick and Shane about the bodies. Before he goes though he looks at me, opens his mouth to try to say something but is having trouble.

"I'm… I'm sorry…"

* * *

**Authors note: Thank you all so much who have favorited and followed! I have to admit the last part felt a little hard for me to write because I want this attack to have an impact on Natalie. I didn't realize until recently how close I made her and Amy (I don't even like her character all that much, I just thought Nat could use a female friend around her own age and since Maggie doesn't show up until season two I made do with Amy.) so I think it'd be realistic for her death to have an effect on Natalie's attitude and outlook on what's happening. Obviously not as drastic as Andrea but still make her question some things. I also tried to give Daryl a moment to try to help her but have no clue how to because he's not used to seeing Natalie's vulnerable side (and he's usually uncomfortable when someone's upset).**


	18. WildFire

**A/N: Okay like a promised here's a chapter to celebrate reaching 50 favorites! Thank you all so much for favoriting and following. Heads up I'm thinking about if I should change this story to M or not because I will be wanting to put more mature stuff in the future. Also I don't know if the language is M worthy or not (I swear I learned most of my curse words in Middle and High School. that's why i personally feel okay with putting it in this story under this label) but if you guys think I should or shouldn't leave a review why and let me get an idea of what I should do. If you have read all of this I thank you for taking the time and if not that's okay but then again if you weren't reading then this whole sentence is pointless... oh well i'm keeping it! Okay now it's seriously the end of this authors note. **

**Review replies:**

**ladycaysie: lol your welcome! An hour of lit can feel like forever but hopefully it wasn't that important or this wasn't too much of a distraction. But I just hope you don't get caught if you do this again but if you do... well maybe they should consider making their lectures more interesting! Whoops, rant over. At least now you don't have to wait too long for the next chapter. **

**Now if you'll excuse me I'll be counting down to the next new episode of Walking Dead. Enjoy the story! Warning this one is a bit more depressing.**

**Disclaimer: i don't not own the rights to The Walking Dead show, comic or any of it's characters just my OC.**

**Warning: Language, violence and gory descriptions.**

* * *

WildFire

All night… we've been up all night. No one dared tried to sleep after what happened. No one felt safe anymore. There was a constant fear that they would come out of the woods again and take out the rest of us. Fifteen people died last night it turns out along with a lot of Walkers. Thirteen of those people I didn't know well and didn't learn their names. The other two were Amy and Ed. I didn't feel that bad about Ed. He was an asshole and Jacqui filled me in about how he was resting in the tent when it happened because Shane beat him up for punching Carol. If anything he got what was coming to him for all the pain and suffering he inflicted on Carol and Sophia for all these years. I look over at them for a second before I go back to dealing with the body, they still look traumatized after what happened and I don't blame them. I look at the body in front of me seeing a lot of bite marks and missing skin but nothing to prevent it from coming back. I take my hatchet that I found on a different body, bury it into the skull and move onto another. It's become a pattern. Check, chop, and repeat. The majority of us have been doing it most of the night, some of the bodies turned into walkers faster than the others so we had to put them down before they could get up.

"Ugh!" I look over to see Daryl with his pickax being buried and pulled out of a head before he leaves and Glenn and T-Dog move it to the fire to be burned. He walks over to the bodies I'm at, panting from exhaustion and the heat. "You okay?" I ask. He nods his head.

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?"

"I'm fine, I need something to do." I say and hit the head of another body. I flinch as the blood squirts out and stains my shirt. "There's so many…" I say.

"Lost count." He says and looks over at where Andrea is sitting with Amy. She hasn't moved all night. Rick comes back. He went off someplace for a bit but was now talking with Dale, Lori and Shane. They were looking at Andrea, probably talking about how to convince her to let them take Amy. Rick goes over but Andrea pulls her gun on him. After saying something to him he backs away with his hands up. Daryl lets out a scoff at the scene and gets up angrily.

"Gonna go set them straight."

"Daryl don't." but he's already gone. I let out a sigh and start to bend down to grab a body, I let out a grunt when it's heavier than I thought but someone comes over and helps me. "Thanks" I say and look over to see it's Jacqui.

"You've been up all night, don't know how you think you can do this by yourself." We pick it up under the arms and start moving it towards a pile. As we walk back I see Daryl is arguing with the others about what do. Jacqui see's what I'm looking at and sighs.

"Damn shame about Amy. But something needs to be done; anyone who has been bit is a threat to us." I wince at that. It's hard to believe that Amy who could never hurt a fly and loved mermaids and other fairy tale stuff was now a threat. I'm avoiding looking at the RV; I can't bear to look over there. Anytime I do I'm reminded that Amy is dead and I feel guilty I wasn't here to help her.

"I know. But Andrea needs to say goodbye and be the one to decide how to handle it." I say as we get another body. "If we do it for her she won't forgive us." I see Daryl stomp off to help with the bodies, looks like he couldn't convince them to take control of the situation.

"Then let's hope it's soon. I'm sorry you lost a friend and she lost her sister but if she comes back it's going to be bad."

"I know… I just don't think I'm strong enough to go over there and try to help."

"We don't burn them!" I look over to see Glenn shouting at Daryl and Morales. They were trying to drag a body towards the pile but he was directing them to another.

"What's that about?" Jacqui asks me.

"I think Glenn is separating the Walkers and the camp victims. There's so much death that it's becoming harder to separate our own and them… I think I get it. Glenn just wants them to be remembered as people, not monsters." Daryl and Morales drag the body toward the digging hole.

"You reap what you sow." Daryl shouts at Glenn.

"You know what? Shut up, man." I hear Morales say to him

"Y'all left my brother for dead. You had this coming." He shouted and stomped off. I let out a sigh and get back to work. I don't feel like calling him out on it this time, we're all tired and in shock about what happened. Nothing I say to him will do any good. I go with Jacqui to get the next body when a tall shadow looms over us. I look up to see Jim, he looks out of it and there's something wet on him.

"Jim, are you okay?" I ask him with concern. He's never been all that sane since I met him but now he was really worrying me.

"Are you bleeding?" Jacqui ask

"I just got some on me from the bodies."

"That blood is fresh. Were you bit?" Jacqui asks with some panic in her voice.

"No. I got scratched during the attack." He says as he bends over to help with the body. Jacqui gets up real quick but I get up slowly.

"You got bit." Jacqui accuses.

"Jacqui!" I warn her. We don't want to scare Jim if he is hurt.

"I'm fine." He says

"Can I see Jim? I'm not accusing you of anything. I just want to see if you're alright. Maybe get you cleaned up." He averts my eyes as he stands up. He's lying about it being a scratch. "Jim… oh god no…"

"Don't tell, please." He pleads looking us in the eyes. I'm torn. I want to help him but if he is bitten then he's putting us all in danger.

"A walker got him. A walker bit Jim." Jacqui calls out to the rest of the group before I can even react.

He backs away from us all the guys circle around him, all of them look worried and Jim is panicking.

"I'm okay. I'm okay." He says even though he looked the complete opposite of okay. He looks more like a trapped animal trying to find an escape but having no luck.

"Show it to us." Daryl demands but Jim is still mumbling about being okay. "Show it to us."

"Jim please." I say in my calmest voice. "We just want to help."

"Easy, Jim." Shane says but Jim isn't listening to reason and grabs a shovel to defend himself.

"Grab him." I hear Daryl say.

"Jim, put it down. Put it down." Shane says but everyone is panicking which isn't helping Jim. I still hear Daryl yelling grab him. T-Dog catches Jim back and holds him.

"I'm okay. I'm okay." He keeps saying as Daryl runs up and lifts up his shirt. I see a huge bite mark on his stomach.

"Jim…" as I get a little closer I see how deep it is. I don't know how Jim isn't in serious pain.

"I'm okay. I'm okay." He keeps repeating those words. Daryl and T-Dog let him go so now he's just mumbling those words over and over as everyone stares at him.

* * *

Were all huddled together to talk about what to do with Jim. He's sitting on top of a crate by the RV looking like a man on trial waiting to be sentenced to death row. Which at this rate seems like the only option some of us are considering.

"I say we put a pickax in his head and the dead girl's and be done with it." Daryl said.

"For god's sake he's not dead yet Daryl. He's scared shitless and were giving him more of a reason to be. Have some empathy for the guy." I say to him.

"I can't! He's dangerous and we're all going to be in deep shit if we don't take him out."

"Is that what you'd want if it were you?" Shane asked.

"Yeah, and I'd thank you while you did it." I see the serious look in his eye. It's the same look from my nightmare when he shoots me in the head because I turned. I shudder thinking about it, not at the act of him killing me but at the thought of turning and becoming a mindless monster and hurting those I care about.

"I hate to say it…" Dale speaks up "I never thought I would… but maybe Daryl's right." I never thought I would hear Dale say that either.

"Dale…"

"Jim's not a monster, Dale, or some rabid dog." Rick speaks up

"I'm not suggesting…"

"He's sick. A sick man. We start down that road, where do we draw the line?"

"The line's pretty clear. Zero tolerance for walkers, or them to be." Daryl says.

"What if we can get him help?" Rick asks. "I heard the C.D.C. was working on a cure."

"What?" I ask. This was new.

"I heard that too." Shane says. "Heard a lot of things before the world went to hell."

"What if the C.D.C. is still up and running?" Rick asks

"Man, that is a stretch right there."

"But it is a possibility." I speak up. "Before we left the city I heard the CDC and Fort Benning may be shelters for survivors. We sure as hell can't stay here anymore, it's too dangerous."

"See?" Rick says. "If there's any government left, any structure at all, they'd protect the C.D.C. at all costs, wouldn't they? I agree with Natalie, I think it's our best shot. Shelter, protection…" I look over to see Daryl looking immpatient.

"Okay, Rick, you want those things, all right?" Shane gets defensive at Rick taking control. "I do too, okay? Now if they exist, they're at the army base. Fort Benning."

"That's 100 miles in the opposite direction." Lori points out. Was it? Damn it I didn't realize that until now.

"That is right. But it's away from the hot zone. Now listen to me. If that place is operational, it'll be heavily armed. We'd be safe there."

"The military were on the front lines of this thing. They got overrun. We've all seen that. The C.D.C. is our best choice and Jim's only chance." I look over at Jim, I really want to believe there's a cure but I don't. I think it takes years to create a cure and before that you have to run all these tests to see if it's safe or works.

"You go looking for aspirin." Daryl says, oh no I have a feeling where this is going. I back away quietly so that I'm closer to Jim. "Do what you need to do." He says and backs up. I get closer to Jim but the only people who realize this are those who don't have their backs to me and Jim. "Someone needs to have some balls to take care of this damn problem!" He turns around to swing his pickaxe at Jim but I stand with my arms out in front of him.

"Stop!"

"Natalie move!"

"Hey hey hey!" Shane yells and Rick takes out his gun and points it at Daryl's head. Daryl stopped swinging when he saw me, his eyes bugged out but now they were angry again.

"Get out of the way Falco."

"No… not until you drop the ax." I say firmly. Our eyes are locked on each other. Neither one of us was backing down but neither one of us wanted to hurt each other either. I could see some fear in his eyes but I mostly think that's from the gun Rick is pointing at his head for what feels like the thousandth time.

"We don't kill the living." Rick says. Daryl slowly puts down his pickax and turns around to look at Rick. Shane comes over and takes my place as I go to Jim's side and put my hand on his shoulder. He looks up at me with grateful eyes. I nod my head at him and turn to look back at the confrontation in front of me.

"That's funny coming from a man who just put a gun to my head."

"We may disagree on some things," Shane says getting his attention, he looks around him to see me with Jim. He still looks upset but not as much as when I was standing where Shane was. "not on this. You put it down. Go on."

Daryl puts the pickax down and walks away. I watch him storm off; he's going to be mad at me for a while. I undermined him, probably embarrassed him but I don't regret it. Rick comes over and grabs Jim by the arm.

"Come with me." He lifts him off the crate and I follow.

"Where are you taking me?"

"Somewhere safe." He says and leads him into the RV. We place Jim down on the bed and I grab some of the first aid supplies to work on his bite.

"Do you mind Jim? I ask. He shakes his head no and I go to take off his shirt but Rick still has a firm grip on him. "Rick, it's okay."

"Just… let me help." he says and we both take off Jim's shirt. He holds him down as I disinfect the wound, that causes Jim to grunt in pain and try to move but Rick keeps him on the bed. It's probably not going to help much but I do it anyway just to be safe. Once I clean it up I put a gauze pad on it and tape it to the area. I frown when it starts to turn crimson red. Rick and I look at each other probably thinking the same thing. Jim won't improve if we don't do something.

"Go check with others." I told him. "I got this." I say. He nods his head and walks out. I turn my attention back to Jim.

"Okay let's get you comfortable. Lay down. You're probably thirsty so I'll go get you some water." I say and go get him some water from the counter. I get myself a glass too realizing how dehydrated I was.

"Why did you help? I thought you were scared of me like everyone else." Jim asked. I place my cup down and bring his over to him.

"I'm not scared of you, just scared of the situation. Right now though you're still Jim, the same Jim I met at that hunter's store who needed help. The same Jim who's been helping Dale with the RV even if that meant taking apart a gorgeous car that I didn't get to drive, I'm still mad about that by the way." He lets out a small laugh at that but I can tell he's still scared. "Anyway, knowing you're still here" I say this part pointing at his head. "And not one of those Walkers doesn't make me scared of you and it doesn't give anyone else the right to take away your decisions and your opinion on what happens to you." I say.

"You'd even risk getting axed by Daryl?" he asked.

"Even risk getting axed by Daryl freaking Dixon." He grunts and grabs on to his stomach. I walk over to help him but he holds his hand out for me to stay away.

"Do you think there's really a cure?" he asks me. I'm thrown back a bit. How do I answer this one honestly, I can't. How can I tell Jim that it seems too good to be true when he desperately needs hope?

"Well… I really can't say for sure. I'm not a scientist or a doctor. I don't know how this works."

"You don't think there is one do you?" he asks.

"I didn't say that."

"You don't have to." He grunts again. "I understand though, you don't have to sugarcoat it for me. You've helped enough. From bringing me here when you had every right not too to trying to stop Daryl… you've done more than enough for me." He says and starts to hold his head in pain. I cringe each he grunts in pain but every time I try to help but he keeps holding out his hand anytime I try to. "Go… you don't have to stay… I can tell you want to get as far away as possible." I try to argue but realize he is right. There's nothing I can really do to help him and I do want to leave. Not just the RV but I think there's a part of me that wants to leave the group altogether and go look for Reese on my own.

* * *

After giving Jim some painkillers and making sure he was comfortable enough in the RV I walk back out. I see Dale went over to talk to Andrea but I still can't go over there, I hear parts of their conversation though.

"This is her birthday?" he asked her. Her birthday? I forgot all about birthdays. I figured when you forgot about time you forget about stuff like that but Dale always kept his watch running.

"Her birthday was always like… like a week long affair. But I somehow always missed it. I was away at college or too busy for kid's parties. She'd call all excited. I always said that I'd make it home and I really always meant to, but I never made it past that phone call." I walk away hearing that. It feels too personal to hear and it hit close to home.

I see Daryl is still hacking away at heads; there are fewer bodies around so I guess we're either burning most of them or burying some away from here. I look over to see Carol looking over at him. Looking closer I see that Ed is one of bodies. The walkers really got to him because most of his torso was missing and you can see his rib cage. His face is pretty messed up almost looking like a zombie version of the Joker. Damn, there's got to be a lot of mixed emotions going through her head. She looks up at me and then looks back at Sophia, I get the hint and walk over to Sophia and she mouths a thank you to me.

"Hey Soph. Wanna take a walk with me?" I ask.

"No thanks…" she says not looking at me. She's still looking at her mom. I sigh and take a seat next to her.

"I'm… sorry about…" I couldn't even finish that sentence, I didn't mean it. I just put my arm around her and she clings to me sobbing.

"It's okay. Everything's going to be okay." I say as I watch Carol go over to Daryl.

"I'm not that sad about him. Is that bad? I'm more worried about me and my mom." She confesses. "He hurt us, badly sometimes but he also could protect us."

"No it's not bad. He did bad things so it's okay that you're more concerned about your mom and yourself. It's called surviving." I say and start stroking her hair with my other hand. I watch Daryl give Carol the pickax and she starts hitting Ed. Sophia gasps and holds on to me tighter with each hit and sob her mom lets out. After a couple whacks Carol stops and is breathing heavy.

"It's okay. It's over…" I say to her and she stops trembling. Carol walks over to us. "Your mom and everyone here will protect you." I say.

"You too, right?" She asks me. I feel guilty, I want to say of course but earlier I was thinking of leaving. How can I make a promise I'm not sure I can keep? Luckily I don't have to answer because Carol comes up to us.

"Thank you Natalie. Sophia I think Carl could use some company, he's in his tent." Sophia nods and walks away, Carol looks at me. "Seriously thank you. For how kind and comforting you've been to her and me. You didn't have to be, especially after how Ed treated you yet you refused to let him get to you." She said. She didn't want to look me in the eyes when she brought up Ed.

"I've met a couple Ed's in my life. They don't faze you after you after a while." She still won't look at me. "Hey, I'm sorry. That was insensitive. But I want you to know that as long as we're together I'd do anything for you and Sophia." She looks up at me. Next thing I know I'm gathered into a hug I'm not expecting.

"Thank you." She says. I awkwardly hug her back and then she goes off to take a seat besides Dale.

God why does everything have to be so hard? I don't know if I can do this. How can I leave if I have Sophia and Carol depending on me? How can I leave Glenn after going through everything to save him? How can I leave Dale who treats me like a daughter? How can I leave Daryl who just lost the only family he has left, who for some reason I feel the need to help keep grounded? But then there's my sister, who has been with me throughout most of my life and has been my best friend. I promised to protect her and look for her, I can't break that promise.

"Ugh... " I look up at that noise and my hand is ready to grab a throwing knife but the sight in front of me makes me sick to my stomach. It's Amy, she came back and Andrea was holding her at arm's length. She's reaching out for her but Andrea keeps talking to her. It could almost look normal if Amy weren't so pale, bloody and didn't have bite marks or missing chunks of flesh. The tears fall down my face slowly, I want to scream at Andrea that it's not Amy but I can't. I can't find my voice, I can't move. All I can do is watch Andrea whisper words to her and slowly brings the gun up to her head.

_Bang! _

I watch Amy fall to the ground, dead once again. I know she wasn't there to begin with but seeing her move again… it's hard to describe. So many emotions flow through you at the sight, it's much different than a someone you never knew when they were alive. It's easy to disassociate that they were once living and breathing human beings. But seeing someone you knew, talked to, laughed with, bonded with and cared about… it's unreal, sickening, and sad seeing them as nothing more than a moving shell with dead eyes. Trapped in a decaying body that is constantly craving flesh and meat… she didn't deserve that. Andrea didn't deserve to see her like that, but she was able to free her. She knows for certain that Amy can't be hurt anymore. I envy that so much right now.

"Natalie?" I turn to see Glenn came up to me. He must have seen me crying. "Are you okay?" he asked me.

"… Yeah. I will be." I think I know what I have to do. I need closure. I need what Andrea had; I need to know what happened to my sister. Even if I don't find her, I want to be able to say I did whatever I could to find her.

"…we're having a funeral. For the rest. It'll be up the hill." He says sullenly.

"Don't let Daryl or anyone else get to you Glenn. It's a good gesture and if we stop caring about death altogether… it just doesn't feel right to me."

"Thank you. It's nice to have someone who isn't looking at me like a basket case."

"Trust me Glenn. I know the feeling. And you are one of the sanest people I've ever met so don't ever think of yourself as crazy or doubt yourself."

"Thanks." He gives me a small smile. It's the first smile he's given all day, but it's gone just as fast as it came. "Help me with the bodies? I know you've been working all night but the more people I get to help the faster it can get done."

"Yeah. I'll help." I say, he nods and we go over to the bodies and help wrap them up and put them in the back of Daryl's truck.

After three bodies I see how tired Glenn is. He's sweating so much and I can't remember when the last time he took a break was. I practically have to order him to go get some water and catch his breath before he reluctantly agrees and walks off. When I look down at the last body I realize it's Ed. You probably wouldn't be able to tell though because of all the damage Carol did to his face but I knew it was him. Yet even in death and looking like he suffered before he died I still can't find any sympathy for him. The way Sophia said he hurt us made my furious, if blood could actually boil from anger than mine would probably have turned to steam by now.

"You gonna do anything or just glare at him." I hear Daryl say as he walks up to me.

"You're actually talking to me after almost putting a pickax in my head?"

"You were in my way. Side's you're still in one piece aren't you?"

"Whatever. I thought you'd be angrier with me but that doesn't matter. I can't move him alone. He's practically twice my size."

"Who isn't? But glaring at him isn't gonna do anything. I don't like the guy either but he's gone now. Can't hurt anyone anymore." He said. "Not his wife, kid, you." He said the last part referring to the time Ed jumped me in the woods. I still feel a sense of triumph every time I remember handing his ass to him. I would have gladly kept beating him if Daryl hadn't scared him off. But I'm kind of surprised he mentioned Carol and Sophia. I don't know how many people knew about it because no one said anything for the longest time.

"How long did you know about what he did to Carol and Sophia?" I asked.

"Long enough. It's not that hard to tell. They always did everything he said looking scared shitless. The excuses the wife made for her bruises never made sense, and seeing how controlling he was over them and how he attacked you showed he was a spineless sumbitch how got off on hurting girls."

"And you didn't do anything? It sounds like you're pretty certain about all this." I say as I roll out the blanket to wrap Ed in. We pick up the body together and move it.

"It's none of my business. Same reason you didn't do anything." He said to me. We rolled Ed up, tied ropes around him so the blanket would stay put and picked him up to put him in the trunk.

"You made it your business when he attacked me." I pointed out. We threw Ed in the back and I could see Daryl scrunch up his face trying to think of how to answer me.

"That was different. Don't matter no more cuz he's dead, the wife got her revenge and he's in the back of this truck bout to be buried." He says and I could tell it was the end of it. "Now do you really believe it's not a mistake to bury these bodies? I know you don't want to hurt your precious Chinaman's feelings…"

"Okay first of all he's Korean. Its bad enough you keep insulting him with racist remarks but don't be ignorant about. Second of all it's not a mistake, these people aren't Walkers. They were just like us and deserve to be put to rest with dignity. Third of all shut up. It's been a long day; I'm tired of talking about this over and over again. I just want to get this done. Mourn my friend and go back to planning on how to find my sister." I go back to laying down the blankets to wrap up the bodies. As I stand back up wrap up a body I see that Daryl is right in front of me staring me down with his slightly beady looking eyes.

"What plans? What are you doing?" he asked. I let out a sigh. I guess if there was someone I could tell my plan to without getting too upset it'd be Daryl.

"It all depends on what happens tomorrow. If we decide to go to the CDC or Fort Benning I'm going to see if she went there for shelter."

"And if not?"

"If not… if no one leaves the camp… I'm going to leave anyway and check them out myself. C'mon, if we don't move this body soon people are going to wonder what's keeping us so long." I say the last part hoping he'd drop it.

"You think you can last out there by yourself?" he asks the last part angrily.

"It's what I'm used to doing Dixon. When shit hits the fan I run and look after myself and my sister only. Besides I have to try. I can't just sit around and do nothing."

"It's stupid. You're gonna leave this camp, and people who give a damn about you to go get killed by a herd of those geeks? The old geezer, Chinaman, okay he's Korean stop glaring at me. The widow and the little girl, you're gonna to leave them without saying goodbye?" he asks me.

"You know I thought you of all people would understand!" I snap at him. I look around but no one is looking at us. I guess it's a good thing we weren't yelling at each other, because this would not be how I'd want them to find out. He glares at me when I say that.

"Don't you bring my brother into this!"

"Look if you care so much then why don't you think about coming with me? You can look for Merle while I look for Reese. We'll have each other's backs if anything happens and you know more about camping and hunting than anyone I've ever met."

"You're serious about this aren't you?" he asks.

"Of course I am. And I don't want to leave them behind, trust me I feel a tremendous amount of guilt and I keep second guessing this but she's my sister. I can't give up on her." I look into his eyes and I actually see some understanding in them.

"And if we do leave for the CDC and it's safe then what?"

"Ideally she'd be there and I wouldn't have to leave. But if she's not and everyone wants to stay I'm still going to Fort Benning and any other possible refugee place I can find looking for her. I won't stop until I have some idea of what happened to her."

"And if you find her dead, or one of them?" he asks and I let out a sigh.

"I know what I have to do…" I say and look over at Dale and Andrea who are carrying Amy's wrapped up body over to us. "Don't tell anyone okay? I still don't know when or if it's happening and I need to be the one to tell them." I plead to him. It's bad enough I have to face them about this but I can't have Daryl be the one to let them know. It has to come from me.

"Fine." He grunts. "But you let me know first." He says and stomps off to get in his truck.

Dale and Andrea lay Amy's body down with the others. I want to say I'm sorry but I think Andrea is probably tired of hearing that. I just give them an apologetic look and walk with them as we follow the truck up the hill. It's the first funeral I've been to in about a decade. It's different from the last one I was at. There's no caskets, no flowers, no chairs for people to sit down and listen to eulogies. It's just a bunch of holes that we place the bodies in and stand around in silence to give them respect. The most upsetting to watch was Amy's. Dale and Andrea carry her body to the hole but Andrea breaks down halfway through, all we could do though was watch her as she said she had it and cried as she got in the hole with Amy. I had to close my eyes though; I couldn't bear to watch it. I wanted to pay my respects but I want to be strong too. No matter how bad it hurts I need to stay strong. Once we buried everyone we started walking down to camp. I look over at Glenn and tell him we did good. He flashes a thankful smile and Dale comes up to me.

"I'm sorry I haven't come up to you sooner. You've been busy and I…"

"Don't worry about it Dale. I understand… I'm sorry I didn't help out with Andrea. I didn't think I could help." I say to him.

"It's okay. You lost your friend. How have you been holding up?" he asked me.

"I'm okay now. I kept switching between sad and shocked all day. Now I'm just tired."

"It's been a long day. Too long. We could all use some rest." We arrived at camp at this point.

"Yeah. I hope you don't mind but I think I'm going to go to my tent early. I want to change my clothes and rest before I take my shift patrolling the perimeter. I'll come out earlier if there's any change in leaving here." I say.

"I understand but I just want you to know something. I told you and Andrea about my wife right?"

"Yeah. Cancer. I'm sorry she went that way."

"Yeah, she accepted it though and now I realize that this world isn't one I'd want her to witness anyway. But my point is that I felt so angry and didn't care about anything for a long time… until I met you girls. When I saw you at that diner looking down on your luck and when I found Andrea and Amy when their car broke down. You girls brought a life back into me that I wasn't sure I'd ever get back. And I can't thank you enough for that." I'm stunned from hearing all of this. Dale's confession touched me, I had no idea he felt this way. I just always thought he was a kind and caring old man since I first met him. But I guess we helped him just like he helped us.

"You don't have to." I say trying to control myself from crying. "You repaid me enough when you were the first person to show me a bit of kindness when I was going through a dark time. You've been like a father figure to me and you have no idea how much that means to me. So thank you." I say and walk to my tent.

I don't know if I can do this. I never meant to get so close. I didn't know I was capable of letting that happen because I've tried for so long not to. But somehow I did, and now I'm making goodbyes so much harder. I pull out a map of Georgia that Glenn and I used to plan our trip to Atlanta and look for the CDC, Fort Benning and other possible locations for refugee camps.

* * *

It was morning now; we were all gathered around waiting to hear what Shane had to say about going to the CDC. Shane told us last night about how Rick's plan was the best course of action for now and I'm relieved he picked the CDC since that is closest to us despite having to go through the city. But I still need to prepare myself for saying goodbye, I'm glad I don't have to leave immediately but if Reese isn't there I have to keep with my plan. I went to check on Jim earlier. His pain and fever was getting worse and he was hallucinating all night. I don't know how much longer he has.

"Everybody listen up." Shane calls out. "Those of you with C.B.s, we're gonna be on channel 40. Let's keep the chatter down, okay? Now you got a problem, don't have a C.B., can't get a signal or anything at all, you're gonna hit your horn one time. That'll stop the caravan. Any questions?" he asks us.

"We're, uh… We're… we're not going." Morales says which shocks me.

"We have family in Birmingham. We want to be with our people." Miranda says.

"You go on your own, you won't have anyone to watch your back." Shane warns them.

"We'll take the chance." Morales says. "I got to do what's best for my family." I can understand that.

"You sure?" Rick asks.

"We talked about it. We're sure."

"All right. Shane?"

"Yeah, all right."

"357?"

"Yeah."

I don't understand what they're talking about until Rick hands Morales a gun and Shane hands him ammo. I guess it's from Rick's bag of guns. I look over to see Daryl isn't happy about parting with another gun and I roll my eyes. God I get that guns are useful but they're also inconvenient. They draw more attention when used than using a quieter weapon like a knife or an arrow. Hell a sword would be very useful but there aren't a lot of those lying around.

"The box is half full." Shane tells him handing out the ammo.

"Thank you all… For everything." Miranda says and Lori goes to hug her.

"Good luck, man." Shane tells Morales.

"Appreciate it."

Eliza hugs Sophia. Both the girls are crying as they say their goodbyes. They became really good friends when this all started and it's sad to see them separated. I have pictures of them playing together that I can give to Sophia to make her feel better. Eliza gives her doll to Sophia, a nice parting gift that means a lot to both girls. Eliza goes back to her family and Sophia goes to hug her mom.

"Channel 40 if you change your minds. All right?" I hear Rick tell Morales.

"Yeah." I go up to say my goodbyes.

"You guys take care. And you better not torment your sister okay Louis? No putting frogs on her pillow or anything like that okay?" I ask jokingly and that gets some laughs out of them and stops some of their crying. Miranda mouths a thank you to me and Morales chuckles.

"You take care too warrior girl."

"Got to keep fighting for our loved ones." I say and we shake hands. Miranda and I shake hands too because we weren't as close as she was with Lori and the other older women. Morales, his wife Miranda and children walk over to the Suzuki Samurai. I head over to my car.

"Let's go. Let's move out." I hear Shane call out and one by one we all leave the quarry.

Our once safe refuge was now going to be a distant memory. The drive is quiet as I follow the line of cars on the road. I haven't had this much quiet time in a while and although it's nice I do kind of wish I had someone to talk to. Earlier I asked Glenn if he wanted to ride with me but he said he would navigate in the RV with Dale. Daryl overheard us and said that a woman and an Asian in the car together would be nothing but trouble. We just rolled our eyes and I wasn't even surprised that Daryl could also be sexist along with racist. We didn't get to drive for too long before the RV pulled over and everyone else stopped. Turns out the radiator hose broke, not that I'm surprised because the whole RV was more like a house of cards.

"I told you we'd never get far on that hose." Dale said to Rick. "I said I needed the one from the cube van."

"Yeah well how about we tell that to Merle if we run into him." I say trying to remind him it's not Rick's fault. Daryl gives me a look and I mouth a sorry to him. Guess it's too soon to make jokes about Merle.

"Can you jury-rig it?" Rick asked.

"That's all it's been so far. It's more duct tape than hose. And I'm out of duct tape."

"I see something up ahead. A gas station if we're lucky." Shane says.

Jacqui gets out of the RV. She looks panicked. "Y'all, Jim… It's bad. I don't think he can take anymore." She goes back to Jim. I bite my lip thinking about the pain Jim must be in, is it selfish of us to keep him alive if he's just going to die from this anyway?

"Hey, Rick, you want to hold down the fort? I'll drive ahead, see what I can bring back." Shane says breaking me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah, I'll come along too and I'll back you up." T-Dog says.

"Y'all keep your eyes open now. We'll be right back." Shane says as he leaves with T-Dog. Rick goes in to see Jim, probably see if Jim can make it to CDC in the condition he's in. I walk around the RV keeping an eye out for anything suspicious or if the engine makes too much noise and draws attention from some nearby walkers. I turn the corner at the back of the RV and see Daryl's doing the same thing as me.

"Nothing?" I ask him.

"So far. You don't have a weapon?" he says referring to the fact that I left my bow in the car. What he doesn't know though is that I have my knife stuffed in my boot if anything happens. I pull it out and flip it open.

"Right here. Are you ever without that crossbow or is it glued to your hand?" I ask him.

"Damn right I keep it with me at all times. Never know when I'm gonna need it."

"So you sleep and take a shit with that thing?"

"Careful with that mouth. Kids and women are around." He mocks me but he doesn't answer my question. It actually wouldn't surprise me if he does; the way he treats it you'd think it was his baby or something.

"Whatever." I say and go to move back to everyone else.

"What do you think is going to happen with Jim?" he asks me. I turn around.

"I… don't think he's going to make it. I don't even think he wants to make it anymore."

"What makes you so sure?" He asks me.

"When I patched him up he asked me if there was a cure. I tried to avoid answering but he knew my answer. But he wasn't upset that I don't think there is one. He accepted it and said I've done enough for him… he's in pain and I can tell he's tired of it." Daryl nods his head agreeing with what I said.

"And he already lost his wife and kids. Getting bit has got to be the final straw." I hear Shane and T-Dog announce their back.

"Come on." I say and we walk back to everyone else. I see Shane hand Dale something and he goes to fix the RV. I guess he found what he need. Rick comes out and everyone turns to face him. I feel I know what he's about to say though by the serious look on his face.

"Jim isn't going to make it to the CDC. He said we should leave him here and let the bite take its course. It's what he says he wants."

"And he's lucid?" Carol asks.

"He seems to be. I would say yes."

"Back in the camp when I said Daryl might be right and you shut me down, you misunderstood." Dale speaks up "I would never go along with callously killing a man. I was just gonna suggest that we ask Jim what he wants. And I think we have an answer."

"We just leave him here?" Shane asks. "We take off? Man, I'm not sure I could live with that." I don't feel all that comfortable with it either. I thought he'd at least want to end the pain altogether and not turn.

"It's not your call, either one of you." Lori says. For once we seem to agree on something.

"Jim's already lost everything." I spoke up. "His wife and kids, his home. When I met him he wanted to die right then and there but Jacqui and I convinced him to come back to the camp. I know that what we did back then was right… but now I think we have no choice but to honor Jim's wish and let him make the final call. We may not like it but his freewill is the only thing he has left." There's a moment of silence before Rick and Shane go get Jim from the trailer.

I see Jacqui has tears running down her face and while I feel sad about this I'm not crying. This was Jim's choice; it was a little different than Amy's death. Her life was brutally taken away and she still had her sister, in reality Jim made his choice long ago but we just prevented it from happening. Rick and Shane come out with Jim who is sweating through his clothes and moaning. They take him up a hill towards a tree and we all follow, wanting to pay our respects and say goodbye.

"Hey, another damn tree." Jim chuckles at that.

"Hey, Jim…" Shane says softly to him "I mean, you know it doesn't need to be this."

"No. It's good. The breeze feels nice."

"Okay. All right." Shane doesn't look convinced but he steps away. Jacqui goes up to him next.

"Just close your eyes, sweetie. Don't fight." She kisses him on the cheek and walks away. Rick takes a gun and shows him.

"Jim, do you want this?" Jim just shakes his head.

"No. You'll need it. I'm okay. I'm okay." Rick nods and walks away. Dale steps forward.

"Oh. Hey. Thanks for, uh, for fighting for us."

"Okay." He says and Dale moves away. The group pays their respects and walk away. I swallowed the lump in my throat and went up to him. I should give him a real goodbye.

"Hey, I know it was rocky meeting but I'm glad I met you. I don't quite understand this but I respect your decision… I just want you to find peace and see your family again." I say patting his hand not sure if I'm doing this right. Last time I was with someone at their death bed I was a sobbing mess and begging them not to go.

"I will… thank you." he pants. I'm about to get up and leave when he says something. "take… take care of your family… take care of the group…" he says. I'm stunned he says this. I didn't realize that the group was thought of as a family, let alone my family. I look back to see Daryl is still here and the rest of the group going to their cars. People that I have come to care about and I guess have become my family, not by blood but still family. I can't leave them now… no matter how much I want to find Reese I can't leave them. I'll need to think of a way to be with both of them.

"I… I will Jim. Don't worry." I say and he smiles before he lets out a moan. I get up and see Daryl walk towards us looking at Jim. Then his eyes meet mine and I nod walking towards him so we can go. I turn though to see Jim laying against the tree with his eyes closed. Daryl nods his head saying goodbye to him and we walk back towards our cars.

"You okay?" He asks me when I get to my car.

"Yeah. I'm okay. I just… I don't think I could do what he did. I'd want to end it quickly and not turn. Even if I couldn't do it I'd wish for someone to do it for me…"

"I'll tell you what." Daryl says. "I'll shoot you if you shoot me. Deal?" he asks. I giggle at that.

"I think I'll have to get in line to shoot you Dixon. But deal." I say. He spits in his hand and offers it too me.

"Ew… I think I'll pass."

"Wuss." He smirks and goes off to his truck. I laugh and watch him walk to his truck. I snap out of it though when I realize the others are probably going to leave without us. I really hope that I don't have to go through with that deal. He's becoming just as close of a friend to me as Glenn is but in a very different way. As I drive by I look to see Jim one last time. He looks like he just fell asleep on a nice day… he finally looks at peace.

* * *

After going through the city, drawing attention from walkers and passing them as they try to grab our cars we finally make it to the CDC. But the so-called shelter looked more like a war zone. Surrounding the building are hundreds of corpses, as well as swarms of flies hovering over the decaying bodies. There were a couple of tanks and army vehicles that have been abandoned for a while. I have my bow on me this time, my knife belt and knife in my leather jacket pocket (I have the hatchet in my car. I resist the urge to cover my nose from the smell, instead focusing on possible threats.

"All right, everybody. Keep moving." Shane's whispering at us. We walk along the path to the CDC, the smell of rotting meat never fading. If anything it was getting stronger and many of us were trying to cover our coughing. "Go on. Stay quiet. Let's go. Okay, keep moving. Stay together."

"Keep moving. Come on." Rick says but people start to hush them. This is the right thing to do though, if any of these bodies turn out to be walkers waiting for food we needed to be quiet.

"Keep it together. Come on." Shane says to us.

"We're almost there, baby. Almost there." Lori says to Carl.

"Guys… it looks abandoned." I say hating to be the bearer of bad news.

Rick and Shane start checking to see if the shutters will open.

"Nothing?" Shane asks before pounding on the door.

"There's nobody here." T-Dog says

"Then why are these shutters down?" Rick asks.

"They might shut down automatically in case of emergency." I say.

"Walkers!" Daryl calls out. I waste no time moving towards him as we shoot at the two making there way towards us. Both of them wearing army uniforms. The kids were whimpering as they saw them.

"You led us into a graveyard!" Daryl yelled at him.

"He made a call." Shane said walking up to Daryl who was making his way towards Rick.

"It was the wrong damn call!"

"Just shut up. You hear?" Shane says pushing Daryl back.

"There could be more. We need to make a decision now." I say taking Daryl's side for once.

"Shut up. Shut up! Rick, this is a dead-end."

"Where are we gonna go?" Carol asks while holding Sophia. Rick wasn't listening though, he was staring at the door.

"Do you hear me? No blame." Shane says but Rick isn't listening.

"She's right." Lori says. "We can't be here, this close to the city after dark."

"Fort Benning, Rick… Still an option."

"It's too far." I say while looking checking for more walkers.

"On what? No food, no fuel. That's 100 miles." Andrea argues.

"125. I checked the map." Glenn speaks up. Daryl changes from his crossbow to a rifle.

"Forget Fort Benning. We need answers tonight, now." Lori demands.

"We'll think of something." Rick says still looking like he's in denial about this being a dead-end.

"Come on, let's go. Let's get out of here. Let's go. Please." We all start heading back to our cars when Rick calls out.

"The camera… it moved."

"You imagined it." Dale says.

"It moved. It moved." He says but I go back to keeping a watch out for walkers. Shane can talk him out of it. Rick slams on the shutters. Crap that's going to attract more attention. Rick, you better know what you're doing.

"Rick, there's nobody here!" Lori shouts at him

"I know you're in there. I know you can hear me…" he says into the camera.

"Everybody get back to the cars now!" Shane calls out. I see some bodies move to get up. Shit! They're awake now! I pull back my arrow waiting for one to get in my range.

"Please, we're desperate. Please help us. We have women, children, no food, hardly any gas left…We have nowhere else to go." He pounds on the door again. The walkers start moving towards us and I put an arrow in one closest to me.

"Keep your eyes open. If you don't let us in, you're killing us! Please!" I look back to see people start moving and Rick dragging Shane.

"Come on, buddy, let's go. Let's go."

"Please help us. You're killing us! You're killing us! You're killing us!"

We're just about to leave when we hear something. I turn around to see the shutters go up and the door to the CDC opens.

"It worked?" I ask aloud as we're blinded by a white light…

* * *

**CDC is next. It may or may not be two parts. **


	19. TS-19 part 1

**A/N: Hey guys wow sorry I'm late with this update! I tried but stuff kept getting in the way like a bad case of writers block for one scene and other things like having to take care of my crazier than usual eleven month old nephew (who I love to death! He's just a screecher), getting ready for Halloween, personal stuff and lack of privacy because my family always tries to spy on me while i'm on the computer which distracts me and DOES NOT make me feel good or no matter how many times I try to explain it to them. Oh well, what matters is I finally got this up. Thank you to all of you who have Favorited, followed and/or reviewed since the last chapter. Also thank you for reassuring me that Daryl and Natalie have a good relationship so far and that I'm doing the right amount of bonding and slow burning romance. I'm going to continue to make it slow burning but some stuff is going to come up now and then starting really soon so I hope you enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Walking Dead TV show, comic book or anything else relating to it. Just my OC. **

* * *

TS-19 

The bright light slowly disappears from my vision and I see a lobby behind the glass doors. There's a big sign that says CDC staring us down. We go forward slowly, those of us have our weapons still drawn if something goes wrong.

"Daryl, you cover the back." Shane says. Daryl stays closest to the back of the group walking backwards to make sure the walkers don't ambush us. As we walk in I see the main lobby looks completely abandoned. Whoever opened the doors obviously didn't do it from here.

"Hello?" No one responds to Rick.

"Hello?"

"Watch those doors. Watch for walkers." Once the doors are closed everyone takes a good look around. Still no one is here. I get an eerie feeling in my gut that is telling me to run while I can.

"Hello?" Rick says

This time we are greeted by the sound of a gun cocking. I look over to see a man holding what looks like a semi-automatic. The guys have their rifle aimed at him in case something happens. I don't have my bow up though because I know I'd be dead before I could try anything.

"Anybody infected?" he asks from where he's standing.

"One of our group was." Rick says "He didn't make it."

"Why are you here? What do you want?" Isn't it obvious? He's got a highly secure facility in the middle of a hot zone.

"A chance." Rick says.

"That's asking an awful lot these days."

"I know."

He takes in our appearances. A group of people varying in ages all dirty, tired and most of us look scared. The kids are clinging to their mothers and the adults who don't have weapons are looking at him with pleading eyes. Don't make us go back out there. We can't go back out there now.

"You all submit to a blood test. That's the price of admission." He finally says.

"We can do that." Rick agrees.

"You got stuff to bring in, you do it now. Once this door closes, it stays closed." He says. I go out with guys to grab some things for the night. Mostly just fresh clothes for myself and helped Rick with Carol and Sophia's stuff in her car. We all run back to the CDC as quickly and quietly as we can and the doors close tight.

"Vi, seal the main entrance." The new guy says into some type of device on the wall. "Kill the power up here." Just like that the shutters go down and we're locked in. It should be comforting knowing nothing can get in but I still feel weirded out by the idea of being locked in someplace after all those nights of being out in the open.

"Rick Grimes." Rick introduces himself.

"Dr. Edwin Jenner." The man introduces himself.

We all make our way through the hallway and squeeze into an elevator, I swear I never had a problem with closed spaces before but now it feels unnerving. Especially since I'm right in the middle of the elevator and everyone is silent. I still don't fully trust this Dr. Jenner guy. Something seems really off about him, although I can't blame the guy since he probably feels the same way about us.

"Doctors always go around packing heat like that?" Daryl asks breaking the silence. Seriously though, that is definitely a military weapon and not what you go out and buy for self-defensive reasons.

"There were plenty left lying around. I familiarized myself." He said and took in our appearances. We all looked pretty disheveled and I could tell he was staring at my stitches and the bruises on my face from when the Vatos gang attacked me. "But you look harmless enough. Except you." He says to Carl. "I'll have to keep my eye on you." he chuckles after saying that. Okay that was nice and all but I still find him weird. We get off the elevator and start walking through a hall.

"Are we underground?" Carol asks. I have a feeling we are, that was a long elevator ride and the building wasn't very tall.

"Are you claustrophobic?" he asks. Guess that answers that question. God this day just keeps getting better and better!

"A little." She says.

"Try not to think about it."

"Easier said than done." I finally say a little hostilely. He notices that and tenses but he doesn't say anything back. I feel someone grab my hand and look down to see Sophia, still holding her doll with one arm and reaching for my hand with her other. I give her hand a reassuring squeeze telling her its okay, no matter how weird I find this whole situation.

"Vi, bring up the lights in the big room." He says and after some humming and beeping the lights go on. It looked like one of those control rooms in movies in a secret headquarters with all the computers lying around. It was colorless too. Only made out of steel and the computers were white. I feel like I'm in a James Bond movie or something.

"Welcome to zone 5." He says. Okay scratch that. I feel like I'm in a sci/fi movie. If I have to fight aliens along with Walkers I'm going to be pissed.

"Where is everybody?" Rick asked. "The other doctors, the staff?"

"I'm it." he says. "It's just me here." So there really are no other survivors here or anything.

"What about the person you were speaking with?" Lori asked confused. "Vi?"

"Vi, say hello to our guests. Tell them... Welcome." He said the last part not sounding too sure.

"Hello, guests. Welcome." A computer like voice said. That doesn't come as too much of a surprise considering how much technology is here.

"I'm all that's left. I'm sorry.

* * *

After giving blood Jenner led us all to the kitchen and is treating us to dinner. Everyone is happy and having a good time and I'm not sure if it's because of the food, a place to stay or the bottles of wine that are being poured. I'll admit I was still unsure about Jenner but after two glasses of wine that was the least of my worries. I haven't felt this good and giddy in a long time, and after everything that happened it was more than welcomed. Of course the kids wanted in on the fun but Lori was refusing to let Carl drink any.

"You know" Dale talks breaking up our laughter. "In Italy, children have a little bit of wine with dinner. And in France." I remember on holidays my grandparents would let me have a sip of wine. I would have rather had soda though because I didn't like the taste.

"Well, when Carl is in Italy or France, he can have some then." Lori says

"What's it gonna hurt?" Rick asks "Come on." We all watch and laugh as Lori gives in. Dale pours Carl a small amount of wine in his glass.

"There you are, young lad." We all watch as Carl takes a sip and scrunches up his face in disgust.

"Eww." And like that we all start laughing. I let out a snort which causes Glenn to laugh louder and I playfully slap his arm and start turning red from embarrassment.

"That tastes nasty." I hear him say once I calm down enough to stop laughing.

"Well, just stick to sour pop there, bud." Rick tells his son.

"Not you, Glenn." Daryl says to my friend next to me who was refilling my glass.

"What?"

"Keep drinking, little man. I want to see how red your face can get." Everyone was laughing at that, even me which got me a glare from Glenn.

"What I'm curious too. Plus I'm all about corrupting the innocent." I say smirking.

"Yeah I think you had enough." He says and tries to take away my glass but I hold it out of his reach while laughing. We get a couple of odd looks and chuckles about how childish we look but we don't care and just laugh it off. Glenn seems to be getting a little buzzed already and he hasn't even had much to drink.

"It seems to me we haven't thanked our host properly." Rick speaks up.

"He is more than just our host." T-dog says.

"Hear hear!"

"Here's to you, doc. Booyah!" Daryl shouts while holding up the bottle. Booyah? Never would have taken Daryl to be a booyah guy. I might just like drunk Daryl. Oh well live and let live.

"Booyah!" Me and a couple of other people shout.

"Thank you" Jenner says.

"So when are you gonna tell us what the hell happened here, doc?" Shane interrupts our merriment. "All the... the other doctors that were supposed to be figuring out what happened, where are they?"

"We're celebrating, Shane." Rick says "Don't need to do this now."

"Whoa, wait a second. This is why we're here, right?" He did have a point. Okay I must be drunk if I'm actually agreeing with Shane for once. "This was your move... Supposed to find all the answers. Instead we..." he stops to laugh quietly. "We found him. Found one man. Why?" Did he not see what we all saw outside? It doesn't take a genius to know something bad happened.

"Well, when things got bad a lot of people just left." Jenner said confirming my thoughts. "Went off to be with their families. And when things got worse, when the military cordon got overrun, the rest bolted."

"Every last one?"

"No, many couldn't face walking out the door. They... opted out. There was a rash of suicides. That was a bad time."

"You didn't leave. Why?" Andrea asked.

"I just kept working. Hoping to do some good."

"Dude, you are such a buzzkill, man." Glenn speaks up.

"Yeah way to go Captain Douchebag." Some people snicker at that I get some dirty looks. "Sorry… kids don't say that word… or drink… I think you were right Glenn." I say and give him my glass. He's laughing still but he takes my drink away from me. Jenner interrupts our laughing.

"Come on. I'll show you where you guys can stay." He gets up and we all follow him through the halls.

"Most of the facility is powered down including housing, so you'll have to make do here. The couches are comfortable, but there are cots in storage if you like. There's a rec room down the hall that you kids might enjoy. Just don't plug in the video games, okay?" Well that probably broke my heart more than the kids. "Or anything that draws power. The same applies...If you shower, go easy on the hot water." However my heart was quickly mended when he mentioned showers.

"Hot water?" Glenn asked with a smile on his face.

"That's what the man said" T-Dog said just as happily. I don't blame either of them because I was getting tired of having to bathe in a quarry every once in a while. I place my stuff in a room I'd share with Andrea and get ready for a long awaited shower.

* * *

"See you guys in the morning. Don't let the bed bugs bite." I say to the kids, Carol and Lori as I leave the rec room with a book. I picked out The Shining by Stephen King. I've always been a big Stephen King fan and this was one of my favorites besides Carrie and Pet Semetary. I was thumbing through the pages when someone grabbed my arm so hard it forced me to drop my book.

"Hey! No need to be rough." I look up to see Shane. He looks completely out of it though. He has this dopey look on his face, his shirt is unbuttoned and he's got a bottle of alcohol in his other hand.

"Have you seen Lori?" He asked.

"Rec room with Carl, Carol and Sophia." He lets go when I answer him and I bend over to collect my book. When I get back up I see he hasn't left yet and is watching me. It makes me feel extremely uncomfortable since I'm only wearing an oversized t-shirt and a pair of shorts. My hair is still damp from my shower and it's probably dripping down my back a bit. "What?" I ask him. He got what he wanted from me.

"Nothing. Just not used to seeing you like this. Cleaned up, behaving. I didn't realize how good you can look because you're always being a bitch."

"Yeah well I'm sure I'd find you more attractive if you weren't an arrogant controlling jackass." My liquid courage from earlier was taking over. I have a feeling this will be an interesting night.

"Now see this is what I mean. You start talking shit towards other people trying to act tough and your pretty face turns into a wicked witch. It's not a good look on you and it's starting to rub off on some of the other women." I cock my eyebrow at that. I guess Lori has been giving Shane attitude.

"Don't blame me for how other people act. Andrea just lost her sister and Lori just got Rick back and wants to follow him. You know, now that I think about it I don't think I'm the problem. You're just looking for someone to blame because Captain Douchebag's ego is being deflated by the return of his best friend." Okay now I was getting into some deep shit and acting a little too cocky as I said this. He looked like he wanted to hit me but we got interrupted by someone stumbling down the halls.

"There you are Nat!" Glenn was stumbling down the hall with a goofy grin on his face and his hat was askew on his head. "I've been looking for you! I was… wait hang on… what was a doing?" Oh my sweet innocent Glenn. He's two sheets to the wind drunk.

"Well I'm going to the Rec Room." Shane said then he whispered in my ear. "Forget this conversation. Go take care of your boyfriend. Or is it that hillbilly? You two go at it like cats and dogs but that's probably just to hide the fact you wanna screw his brains out."

"You shut the fuck up about them!" I mutter back while giving him a death glare.

"So you do care about him. If you're smart enough though you'll pick Glenn. Daryl seems like one of those guys girls always go slumming for just to get dumped once he screws them while Glenn will fall in love with the first girl who makes him a man." He chuckles and walks off. His hand brushes against my thigh and I want to break his hand but Glenn interrupts me.

"Oh yeah! I wanted to see if you'd come play a drinking game with us!" Glenn finally remembered what he was going to say just in time. Because now Shane walked away without getting hurt, next time he won't be so lucky. But I ignore that and turn around to my friend who was acting really giddy and it made me feel better.

"Glenn you've been drinking without me?" I asked with a jokingly hurt tone.

"A little. Daryl found some harder stuff and had me play a game. It was like pennies but we didn't use pennies."

"And it didn't occur to you that playing with someone who never misses a walker head won't miss a cup?" I asked while laughing.

"…No... Oh man I'm so stupid. Anyway I told them I was going to go find you, which caused T-Dog to do some type of whistling or howling. I think he thinks we're together. But I told him it wasn't like that." I roll my eyes.

"So I've noticed a couple people think that. Come on let's get you in bed." I say and start leading him to his room.

"Why? I said I'd go drinking with the others… wait what are you going to do to me?" he asks with wide eyes. I laugh.

"Relax Glenn. I won't take advantage of you, no matter how cute you look right now. I'm just going to make sure you go to sleep. You're going to have a wicked hangover in the morning."

"Okay thanks Nat. This is why you're a good friend. Always looking out for me… okay I'm going down." He says as his knees buckle and he keels over, we both fall to floor and I lose my book for the second time. I hear someone laughing, more like howling actually, as I try to get up and Glenn is rambling about making a delivery on time.

"Yeah he's shit faced alright. And pretty red too." Daryl says watching us.

"Yeah like a tomato. Can I get a little help?" I ask getting up and half dragging Glenn. He grabs my book but when I give him a glare he goes to grab Glenn's other side and we drag him to his room.

"So what? You were just going to tuck him in and read him a bed time story?" he asks then looks at the title of my book. "Seriously? Your life is practically a horror story, why do you need to read another one?"

"Don't hate the classics! Besides that's a different kind of horror… hey something's different about you. Did you get a shower?"

"Yeah what of it?"

"It's just different to see you without dirt or walker blood all over you. You don't look half bad." I say a little too honestly but I didn't care.

"How much wine did you have tonight?"

"You know usually people return a compliment. Like you don't look so bad yourself Natalie." He looks at me for a minute.

"You look… wet. How much water did you use?" I let out a sigh and rolled my eyes. I should have expected something like this.

"Just as much as everyone else. But my hair is so thick that it holds it all in for a long time." We get to Glenn's room and untangle his arms from around our shoulders and lay him down on his cot. I feel a slight pinch and let out a yelp.

"What?" Daryl asked giving me worried look.

"Nothing… but I'm pretty positive Glenn just stole second base in his sleep." I say looking down at the passed out man on the cot. Damn he looks too peaceful to wake up.

"You have no shame do you?" I just shake my head no. "Sumbitch probably won't even remember it. Real lightweight." I let out a laugh. "You two are weird together. Even when you haven't been drinking you two act weird around each other." He says

"And yet for some reason people automatically think we're flirting with each other… why can't people mind their own damn business? I see the guy as a dorky brother, it'd be too weird for me to get with him now. Like incest." He stares at me weirdly for that and it causes me to laugh. I think it's the alcohol but for some reason he looks kind of cute when he scrunches up his face when he's uncomfortable.

"If you're staying here any longer I need another drink." He says and grabs a bottle he's keeping on a table. I see some of his stuff is in here so I guess they were sharing a room tonight.

"What? You didn't always need to be drunk to hang out with me."

"That was sober you. Drunk as a skunk you is completely different. You're more happy, giddy, random and blunt."

"Oh come one Daryl, it's been a long day and we all needed to let loose a little since we're safe for now. Besides, I heard you laughing when I called Shane Captain Douchebag."

"I had some wine, and that was sort of funny." He says and takes a sip. He holds out the bottle to me and I take a swig. It's some type of gross bourbon but I keep as much of a straight face as I can.

"This stuff reminds me of when I had my first drink. I was fifteen, my foster sister and good friend stole a bottle from our foster parents on Halloween. We went to some abandon building from the earlier 1900s with some friends and passed around the bottle while telling ghost stories." I let out a laugh. "We got so wasted that we actually thought the building was haunted. Anytime we heard the faintest little noise we screamed and started running. However someone heard us and called the police, when they found us I was throwing up on the ground and begging not to be a vessel for Satan while one of my guy friends was trying to recite lines from the Exorcist movie to banish the evil demon possessing me…" I start cracking up at the image of him using the bourbon like it was holy water and the cops looking at us like we were lunatics. It's actually the same one Daryl is giving me as he shakes his head at me.

"Why doesn't it surprise me that you've been bat shit crazy since you were a kid? Vessel for Satan? Really?" he asks me.

"I'll admit I may have watched The Exorcist before we went there. Bad choice but in all fairness I didn't know I'd be drinking." He's just rolling his eyes at me. "So what was your first drink?"

"Doesn't matter."

"Oh come on! I told you my awkward horror story of my first time! Oh wait no… that's a different story…Please say something so I stop rambling."

"Why would I do that? This is starting to get interesting. Sides you're doing enough talking for the both of us." He says with a giant smirk on his face. I then notice he has my book in his hands and he's acting like he's reading while I talk… damn he's an asshole.

"You're an ass. You know that right?"

"I've been told that a couple times, along with some other things."

"Whatever. I'm going to go to bed. Give me my book." I reach out to grab it but he grabs my wrist with his other hand. He tugs on it and I fall to the ground in front of him.

"Really? Was that…" I stop when I feel a soft stroking on my wrist. Not soft as in his skin was soft though because I feel the calluses on his fingers, the way he was stroking my skin was like I would break if he pressed any harder. He was tracing the inked lines of my tattoo, following the intricate curves and loops with his thumb. I look up at him with a question look but the look in his eyes tells me he's lost in thought, possibly not even realizing he's doing this.

"Dixon!"

"Mmmh!" he snaps out of it. He lets go of my wrist like I just caught on fire and he burned himself. He seems embarrassed and mad at himself. I let out a small laugh; there was no need to get too upset. Hell I didn't really mind, I was just curious about what he was doing.

"Curious about anything?" I ask with a quirked eyebrow. I could have some fun with this as payback!

"Huh?" he looks so uncomfortable right now. I almost feel bad for him… well almost. "Oh, that your first tattoo?" he asks me.

"Yeah. My sister and I got matching ones when I turned sixteen. It's supposed to be a sign of sisterhood… wait what do you mean first?"

"You have another one… on your back, you told me." He said.

"I have never told anyone about the one on my back… except Sophia and Eliza, they found out. But other than that I've been wearing certain clothes so no one would see it." How could he have known… wait… that one time when he wouldn't leave while I changed. My expressions changes from confusion to mischievous. "Did you peek? That time in Dale's RV? Did you watch me change?" I scoot a little closer to him, he moves backwards obviously uncomfortable.

"… You weren't hiding anything! Besides it was just your back… and your hair was hiding most of it so I don't know what it is!" He says very defensively.

"Relax I'm just teasing you. I was really confused that's all. I guess I'm not as a careful as I thought."

"You and careful don't go together… so what is it? On your back?"

"What do you think it is?"

"I thought I saw feathers… wasn't too sure though. I'd need another look to know for sure."

"If you're just trying to get me out of my shirt Daryl all you need to do is ask."

He's getting tired of my shit though. He rolls his eyes and turns me around. I let out a little yelp as his hands move from my arms to push my hair to the side. His fingers run through my damp hair then they move to the collar and move it down my shoulder blades. I feel exposed, vulnerable and yet oddly enough I don't feel threatened. Normally if someone man-handled me like that they would get a broken nose but this feels completely different. Like I said earlier, if he wanted to see it all he had to do was ask. But then he wouldn't be Daryl if he did things politely.

"Wings huh? I thought so but they're not angel wings. These are brown."

"Yeah they're not angel wings. Can you guess what type they are nature man?"

"Falcon wings right? You really like your last name don't you?"

"It's a family thing. My dad had one and my grandfather used to always say we had the name to remind us we were strong, no matter what we go through we always rise above it."

"Really? Rise above it?"

"Yeah, my grandfather loved puns. It was annoying but he didn't care. He was always positive, silly and wanted to make his loved ones happy through the best and worst of times up until the day he died."

He traces the tattoo as I talk. Following the outline and sometimes tracing each textured feather. I had it done in three sessions because I wanted it to look almost as realistic as possible without a whole lot of pain. Soon enough he's done looking at the right side of my shoulder and moves on to the left. I feel him pause on my spine, which causes a me to feel a tickling sensation before he heads to a certain area close to my heart. I panic and pull my shirt back up before he gets to the part of my tattoo that's distorted by an old scar. I almost forgot about it in the moment but when I felt his fingers getting close to it the memories started to come back. I turn to face him to a look of shock on his face but it disappears and is replaced with a slightly amused one.

"Getting shy on me already?" he asks.

"You've looked long enough. I was just… god you're an ass."

"And the sky is blue and Chinaman's passed out so bad a bomb could go off without him waking up. Tell me something that I don't already know." He says. I roll my eyes.

"I'm going to bed." I say grabbing my book and get up to leave.

"… whiskey." He says. I stop and turn around confused.

"You really want to keep drinking? Do you want to end up like Glenn over there?" I point to the snoring lump on the mattress who I almost forgot about until just now.

"No whiskey was my first drink. I was bout twelve or thirteen. Dad was out chasing waitresses in short skirts and Merle was in and out of jail. I was home alone looking for something to eat when I found one of the bottles. I was bored and there was enough so that my old man wouldn't notice someone else had one."

"Why do I have a feeling this isn't going to end well?" I ask leaning against the door. Daryl was looking around the room for something.

"Shut up and let me finish! So anyway I'm halfway through the bottle when someone slams the door open and's calling for me. I panic and hide the bottle behind the couch thinking it's my dad. Turns out Merle was out of jail and needed a place to crash. He found the bottle behind the couch and knew it was me. Instead of beating me though he was laughing and saying how he was waiting for the day he could share a drink with his brother. So he starts drinking with me talking about all the shit he's done and who he's done and then he brings out my crossbow I got from my uncle and goes outside to shoot things with it." Uh-oh. "He starts hollering and starts shooting at all the squirrels but he keeps missing. I'm calling him out on it so he throws it to me saying if I'm so much better than him than prove it. I'm so wasted though I could barely see anything. When I saw something that looked like a squirrel I took the shot…"

"And you missed, puked and Merle called you a sissy boy right?" I think out loud imagining a little grumpy and drunken Daryl Dixon trying to shoot at squirrels while wasted. His arms too skinny to hold up the crossbow, blue eyes looking cloudy and squinting trying to aim, and his knees wobbling and threatening to collapse on him. I don't know why I thought of him this way but i definitely cannot picture the fit and muscular man he right before me in that situation. The one who takes his hunting so seriously.

"No! I shot and killed the thing. It just wasn't a squirrel… the neighbors had this damn cat."

"No!… you didn't?"

"Thing let out a yowl that could wake the dead before it collapsed. The guy that owned the place came out so fast and he was cussing us out. Comes up to slap me but Merle starts beating the shit out of him. I see my dad's truck coming down the road and go inside to avoid the shit storm."

"Oh my god that's terrible." I say while trying not to laugh but failing. Tears are falling down my face from laughing so hard.

"Yet here you are laughing. At least I didn't throw up in my story."

"Yeah your right. Thanks for sharing with me. What were you looking for anyway?" I ask.

"This." He says and holds up my MP3 player. "I found it before I showered and thought I'd give it back while I still remembered."

"Oh yeah, I was pissed at you for stealing it but then I forgot about it." I say as he comes over to hand it to me.

"I didn't steal it. I just forgot to give it back before I went hunting and couldn't find a time to give it back. Battery's probably dead though. I forgot to turn it off after listening to it."

"Gee, why am I not surprised?" I say as he hands it to me. "You know… maybe you're not such an ass. I kind of like this side of Daryl Dixon."

"What side is this?" he asks looking at me with his steel blue eyes. He's standing really close to me and as much as I don't want to admit it he is attractive. Hard to believe I'm saying this when in the past twenty-four hours he tried to attack Rick, threatened T-Dog and Jim, shot a guy in the ass, and butchered a lot of walkers while he was on a rampage over his redneck brother. That was his crazy side, the side that would have any sane girl running for the hills.

"A side that's friendlier, amusing to talk to, someone I can laugh with, joke with, tease without hurting your feelings, you're still rude and an ass but I don't mind. You… just kind of help make this whole situation not suck as much as it does. When you're not threatening to chop someone's head off that is."

"I can't promise to stop that."

"Well then I'll just have to be there to stop you."

"Changed your mind about leaving? What about your sister?" he asks. Oh yeah… I forgot to tell him.

"I still want to look for her; I just won't abandon the group and take every opportunity I can to go looking for her. You can't get rid of me that easily Daryl." I say the last part teasingly expecting a sarcastic response but I don't get one. Instead he just looks at me, questioning what I just said but also looking glad that I said it.

It actually feels like we're getting closer. I think about pulling away and leaving but I'm also curious about how close he'd get until he stops. I feel his breath on my skin and I'm amazed he hasn't moved away yet. He's still hesitating though, he looks like he's trying to fight himself from getting close but is losing. I'm so used to him keeping his distance, like he was afraid of being close to me let alone touching me. It's got to be the bourbon doing this to him. I know it's affecting me because right now I just want to know what's going to happen and damn whatever consequences happen later. To not over-think it for once and just let go. But Glenn's snoring brings us back to our senses. He steps away from me and I act like nothing happened, which is actually honest now that I think about it.

"Okay now I'm going to bed." I laugh. "What's wrong with us?" He tenses at that. "We actually have the opportunity to get a good night's sleep yet here we are taking it for granted."

"Too good to be true?"

"I thought that coming in here. But the wine helped convinced me to be more positive. Goodnight Daryl." I say opening the door and leaving to go back to my room.

Well I got tipsy, embarrassed myself, let him see a part of myself I keep hidden (hopefully he didn't see the scar), got know Daryl a little bit, and I almost gave in to curiosity and temptation in front of my drunk friend who was sleeping a couple feet away from us… what the fuck! I better forget most of this shit in the morning because I'm going to be really upset with myself for dropping my guard in front of the one guy I probably shouldn't. Scratch that, the one guy I definitely shouldn't. I open my door to see Andrea sleeping on the cot. I hear soft sobs coming from her and feel instantly guilty that my friend died only a day ago and I decided to dull my feelings with alcohol while avoiding her sister who is obviously still broken about it. I grab the blanket off the couch and drape it over me as I lay down and read my book. The last thing I remember is Jack Torrance (the main character) entering the forbidden room 217 before my eyes close from exhaustion.

* * *

**I actually thought I would be able to post this on Halloween but time got away from me as Trick or Treaters kept interuppting me and then I was exhausted to finish it. There were so many people dressed up as characters from Frozen that if I took a shot for everyone that came to my door I'd probably need to get my stomach pumped haha. Okay hoped you enjoyed it! Next one is the end of season one then we move on to season two! I know a lot of people don't that season because it lacked action but I did like how more characters got developed. **


	20. TS-19 part 2

**A/N:** **I am so sorry. This is long overdue so lets get to it. **

* * *

_TS-19 part 2_

_Knock Knock_.

A groan escapes my lips as I'm pulled out from a very deep dream. I didn't want it to end. I was on a beach watching the moon pull the tide back and forth. I could almost smell the fresh briny scent in the air, hear the lullaby the sea was singing as the waves would crash against the shore, and feel the soft and warm sand under my feet but then the water brushes past my ankles before retreating back into the sea. It was so peaceful, so beautiful; I almost didn't know it was a dream at times. But there was someone else there with me. I didn't find out who it was though, they had their arms wrapped around my waist, their fingers going under the loose-fitting white spaghetti strap top I was wearing and tracing circles against my skin. Their head was leaning on my shoulder, watching the ocean with me and occasionally pressing their lips against my skin. Up and down my shoulder, collar-bone, and neck. A husky undistinguishable voice was whispering in my ear, whoever it was they made me feel safe, happy and… they made me want them. Sure it was corny and cliché as hell but it was my dream and I wanted it to continue. But now I won't know who that mysterious sexy person was because some had to go and ruin it.

I push myself off my side and slowly swing my legs from the couch to the floor. Surprisingly I don't feel hung-over or have a headache. Andrea is fast asleep on the cot. She was probably up late night last from crying so a fog horn wouldn't wake her up. I got up and walk towards the door opening it and expecting to lash out at whoever interrupted my sleep. I open it and come face to face with… nothing? The hallway light is flickering giving it an eerie horror movie vibe. Out of the corner of my eye I see a shadow move along the wall. I turn my head to the direction it's in only for it to disappear. I step out of the room to follow it but stop when I hear a crunching sound under my foot. It's a piece of paper. I bend down to pick it up.

_Meet me in the kitchen_

So they wanted me to follow them? Ignoring the fact that this is the one thing that usually gets someone killed I start heading for the kitchen. The shadow keeps coming up but anytime I get close to it they disappear. No matter how fast I approach it I can't get close enough to catch them. The corridors seem endless… and the flickering lights don't help. Am I going mad? Am I going to end up in a maze I can't get out? Turn after turn I finally end see the doors to the kitchen. I open them and enter the industrial kitchen. No one is there though. Another piece of paper is sitting on the table. My bare feet cross the floor silently. It's too quiet though. I can hear my own breathing as the table gets closer to me. The piece of paper beckoning me to pick it up. My hand automatically reaches for it and I read what's on it.

_Don't over think it_

"What the…" my mouth is muffled before I can finish.

One hand is placed over my mouth and another is at my hip, its fingers slide up my shirt and nails scratching at my stomach. I gasp and think about attacking but then lips are tracing from my neck and to my collar-bone. The fingers are no longer scratching me but are now tracing circles on my stomach. I let out a moan and ease into the broad body behind me. The hand drops revealing a lustful smile on my face; it's the same guy from my dream. Sensing my comfort and pleasure the man starts to playfully bite at my skin. I let out another moan and turn around to capture those lips with my own. He is just as demanding if not more. The kiss deepens, both of us fighting for dominance as I lean against the table for leverage. He picks me up and drops me on the table making me gasp and break away for air. I open my eyes to stare into the intense blue eyes of…

... Daryl?

"Wait…" I protest when he tries to kiss me again. This was not the Daryl I knew. "What are you doing?"

"What I should have done last night." He replies in the same husky voice from the beach. His voice…

He attacks my lips again and I don't protest. My left hand grabs onto his bicep to feel the muscles pulsating under my fingers and my right hand goes to his hair to bring him closer to me while running my fingers through his hair. He lets out a moan and grabs me by hair pulling my head back so he has better access to my neck. I feel his fingers moving towards my inner thigh, playing with the cuff of my shorts.

… "Natalie?"…. a soft far voice from far away calls out.

… _Sophia?_ I look towards the door but she's not there.

"Natalie wake up!" someone grabs me by the arm and starts shaking me.

"Whoa!" I roll off the couch and land on the floor. My head is pounding, my heart is racing and a fire in my stomach is fastly dying. "Oh my head..." I open my blurry eyes and see the innocent looking face of Sophia hovering over me. "Ugh… what happened?"

"Me and mommy came to see if you and Andrea wanted breakfast. She opened the door but you were crying out in your sleep. I woke you to stop your bad dream." She says. I look up to see Andrea leaving for breakfast and Carol looking at me smugly. Oh god…

"I was talking in my sleep? Did I say anything embarrassing?" I asked unable to process what I was dreaming about. Anytime I drank I couldn't remember my dreams completely.

"No you were just groaning and sounded like you were getting hurt. Were you being attacked?" she asked. Carol was trying not to laugh.

"I don't know, maybe… all I remember is a beach, then a creepy hallway and a shadow… okay no more reading before bed." I say grabbing the book I fell asleep with and putting it back on the couch. "Let me get dressed and I'll meet you for breakfast."

"Okay!" she says happily and walks out of the room. Carol however was still staring at me with knowing a look on her face.

"What?" I ask.

"Nothing…" she says. "It's like Sophia said you were crying out… it just didn't sound like it was from fear." Not from fear? Wait… oh no not that!

"… HOLY SHIT!" I groan covering my face in embarrassment and lying back on the floor hoping it would swallow me up and suffocate me so I wouldn't have to feel this humiliated. The dream was coming back to me.

"Don't worry. Sophia just thinks it was a nightmare. However if you ever want to talk about it I'm a good listener." Carol teases.

"Just go eat! I'll be there soon." I say. She laughs and leaves me alone. The details slowly come back to me, every agonizing detail. "Well... I'm never getting drunk again." I vow to myself. That has to be the reason I would actually dream about Daryl freaking Dixon like that… there we go! No reason to get embarrassed when you see him… yep… no reason at all…

* * *

I walk into the kitchen to see most of the group was already awake. T-Dog was cooking something and Lori, Carl, Andrea, Dale and Glenn were at one table. The pain in my head lightens as I take in Glenn's appearance. The guy was laying his head on the table and looked like he'd been through hell and back. I pull up the seat next to him and sit down.

"Morning." I say to everyone. Everyone but Glenn says morning back. He just groans and I laugh while stealing his coffee. "It really doesn't surprise me that you're like this."

"Oh god… how are you not in pain?"

"I am. Not as much as you obviously but I have more experience with it than you."

"Just tell me I didn't do anything stupid." He says. We all start laughing and he looks at us in terror.

"Relax Glenn." I say patting his shoulder. "You played a game with the guys, went looking for me and passed out while I was taking you back to your room. Daryl helped me put you to bed." I leave out the part where he pinched me in a certain area. I can always hang that over his head later when we're not in front of a lot of people. He looks relieved but then he moans while rubbing his head. "Need a little hair of the dog?" I ask him.

"That doesn't work Natalie. It'll just make it worse." T-Dog shouts from where he was cooking.

"It's true Natalie. Don't be a little devil." Dale says. I pout and Carl laughs from his seat at my face.

"Morning." I look up to see Rick walk in.

"Are you hung over?" Carl asks bluntly, gotta love kids. "Mom said you'd be."

"Mom is right."

"Mom has that annoying habit." Lori says. I roll my eyes.

"Eggs. Powdered, but... but I do 'em good." T-Dog says as he brings them over. I gag at the thought of powdered eggs. How does that even work?

Glenn lets out a moan and Jacqui, who just came in, comes up and starts comforting him. I just try not to laugh.

"I bet you can't tell. Protein helps the hangover." T-Dog says as he puts some eggs on Glenn's plate and then some on mine. Glenn lets out another moan and I give him a little of my eggs.

"Where'd all this come from?" Rick asks.

"Jenner." Lori answers. "He thought we could use it. Some of us, at least."

"Don't ever ever ever let me drink again." Glenn says.

"I'm not making any promises Glenn. Everyone says that after their first hangover."

"Hey." Shane says as passes us to get some coffee. Carol and Sophia just took their seats.

"Hey. Feel as bad as I do?" Rick asks.

"Worse."

"The hell happened to you?" T-Dog asked him "Your neck?" When Shane sits I see what T-Dog was talking about. He had long scratch marks on his neck, they weren't there when he cornered me last night.

"I must have done it in my sleep."

"Never seen you do that before." Rick says.

"Me neither…Not like me at all." He said the last part looking at Lori who was avoiding his gaze. Well I'm glad that someone finally put the douchbag in his place. Even if it was Lori. But I can't help but wonder what he could have done, and did I put her in danger.

"Morning." Jenner says snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Hey, doc." Shane says and we all say good morning to Jenner. "Doctor, I don't mean to slam you with questions first thing..."

"But you will anyway." Jenner says cutting out the bullshit Shane was setting up.

"We didn't come here for the eggs." Andrea says.

He turns to look at us, contemplating about answering our questions. Most of us were still finishing our food though. Daryl just showed up out of nowhere and grabbed a plate. I avoid looking at him though, still embarrassed about my dream last night. What was I? A hormonal teenage girl? That was the least important thing to think about, what matters most is how did this all start.

"How much do you know about this disease? How and why people turn into walk… those things." I ask him.

"When you're all done breakfast I can show you something. It'll help explain it a little but I can't promise you that you'll feel any better once you know." He says.

Once we're done breakfast we follow him to the computer room. My stomach is hurting but I can't tell if it's from too much coffee at breakfast or if it's from fear of finding out what he knows. What if he knows nothing? Or what if it's worse than we could imagine and we're all destined to end up like them?

"Give me playback of TS-19." He says to his computer.

"_Playback of TS-19." _Vi says and the giant screen in the room starts loading processing codes.

"Few people ever got a chance to see this. Very few."

I look up at the screen. It's a digital profile of someone, I can't be sure but I feel like it was a female. Her face disappears and we can see her brain and her spine, must have been an MRI or something. The brain is glowing a neon blue color.

"Is that a brain?" Carl asks.

"An extraordinary one." Jenner answers. "Not that it matters in the end. Take us in for E.I.V.."

"_Enhanced internal view." _

The playback changes. The person is now laying down like they are being monitored. The brain is brighter in certain areas than others and the lights were blinking in the different areas of the brain. It's one of the most amazing things I've ever seen. Especially when it's zoomed in and we see all the veins and wires that make up the brain. It's weird to think that's inside my head, inside all of our heads.

"What are those lights?" Shane asks.

"It's a person's life...experiences, memories. It's everything. Somewhere in all that organic wiring, all those ripples of light, is you...the thing that makes you unique. And human."

"You don't make sense ever?" Daryl asks. I roll my eyes but I'm not surprised, this was hard stuff for a lot of people.

"Sorry about him. Manners and Biology aren't his strengths." But that doesn't mean I can't joke about it.

"Those are synapses, electric impulses in the brain that carry all the messages." Jenner explains. "They determine everything a person says does or thinks from the moment of birth to the moment of death."

"Death? That's what this is, a vigil?" Rick asks.

"Yes. Or rather the playback of the vigil."

"They were infected? Weren't they?" I asked even though I already knew the answer.

"Yes… yes they were."

"This person died?" Andrea asked "Who?"

"Test subject 19. Someone who was bitten and infected...And volunteered to have us record the process. Vi, scan forward to the first event."

"_Scanning to first event." _

The numbers on the screen show that time has passed forward. Something has changed though. Parts of the wiring aren't lighting up, they look like a dead tree you would find in a Tim Burton movie with the dark red and blue colors that almost look black. Was this the virus?

"What is that?" Glenn asks.

"It invades the brain like meningitis." He says. I watch the screen as he talks. The person is breathing heavy and the virus expands. She looks like she's in so much pain. "The adrenal glands hemorrhage, the brain goes into shutdown, then the major organs." The brain activity goes completely dark and she stops moving. "Then death. Everything you ever were or ever will be...Gone." he looks upset as he says this.

"Is that what happened to Jim?" Sophia asks Carol.

"Yes."

There's a moment of silence as we remember Jim and the others. Andrea lets out a sob thinking about her sister. Jenner looks confused about why she's so upset.

"She lost somebody two days ago." Lori explained. "Her sister." Jenner walks up to Andrea.

"I lost somebody too. I know how devastating it is." Honestly at this rate who hasn't lost someone? "Scan to the second event."

"_Scanning to second event."_

"The resurrection times vary wildly. We had reports of it happening in as little as three minutes. The longest we heard of was eight hours. In the case of this patient, it was two hours, one minute...Seven seconds." The brain starts to faintly glow red in the center. At the base where the spine and the brain are connected. It reactivated itself, but not completely it looks like.

"It restarts the brain?" Lori asks astonished.

"No, just the brain stem. Basically, it gets them up and moving."

"But they're not alive?" Rick asks

"You tell me."

"It's nothing like before. Most of that brain is dark."

"Dark, lifeless, dead. The frontal lobe, the neocortex, the human part... That doesn't come back. The you part." The part that I was afraid might be stuck there with no control over your body. "Just a shell driven by mindless instinct." Something appears at the top of the screen. It shoots a white light through the brain leaving something that looks like a tunnel through it. It destroys what's left of the virus and the screen goes blank.

"God. What was that?" Carol asks

"He shot his patient in the head." Andrea says sadly. Didn't you?"

"Vi, power down the main screen and the workstations."

"_Powering down main screen and workstations." _

"You have no idea what it is, do you?" Andrea asks.

"That video may explain how it works but what type of virus is it?" I ask.

"It could be microbial, viral, parasitic, fungal."

"Or the wrath of God?" Jacqui says coldly.

"There is that."

"Somebody must know something." Andrea says "Somebody somewhere."

"There are others, right? Other facilities?" Carol asks.

"Yeah." I say "You can't be the only one trying to figure out what's happening... right?"

"There may be some. People like me."

"But you don't know? How can you not know?" Rick asks.

"Everything went down. Communications, directives... all of it. I've been in the dark for almost a month."

"So it's not just here." Andrea says "There's nothing left anywhere? Nothing? That's what you're really saying, right?"

He doesn't respond to that. He can't even look us in the eye. Damn… is everything really gone? The structure of society that we've tried to keep together for so long is now gone. Nothing to help us, nothing to direct us, nothing to stop us from doing anything.

"So it's complete anarchy now? Every man and woman for themselves?"

"Jesus."

"Man, I'm gonna get shit-faced drunk again." Daryl says.

"That… sounds really tempting right now." Although I definitely don't want to get as drunk as last night. Yeah… none of that again…

"Dr. Jenner" Dale says "I know this has been taxing for you and I hate to ask one more question, but... That clock... It's counting down. What happens at zero?" Clock? Counting down?

"Okay I may be overly paranoid but why do I have a bad feeling about that?"

"The basement generators... they run out of fuel." Jenner explained.

"And then?" Rick asks but Jenner doesn't respond, he starts walking away.

"Hey! You're not telling us everything!" I shout at him.

"Vi, what happens when the power runs out?" Rick asks. Wait we can do that? I thought it was programmed for Jenner's voice.

"_When the power runs out, facility-wide decontamination will occur." _

"I really don't like the sound of that and he's not telling us everything."

"I know Natalie but we need to keep calm." Rick says and motions with his head towards the kids. Crap, I'm starting to hate having to worry about their feelings.

"I know, I do but don't they also have the right to know whats going on? We can't keep them sheltered forever."

"Okay everyone return back to your rooms while Rick, Glenn T-dog and I go check out the generators." Shane orders everyone.

"Are you okay or do you want to come with us?" Rick asks

"I'll keep calm, don't worry. Besides I'm not much help when it comes to this stuff." I say and then leave to go back to my room.

* * *

"Can you stop pacing Natalie? It's obviously not helping." Andrea says.

I'm kind of starting to wish I went with Rick and the others or went drinking with Daryl. So far it's just been me and Andrea sitting in an uncomfortable silence. Well I went from sitting, to lying down to pacing the room. I couldn't focus on anything. The word decontamination and some of the other things that were said earlier were running through my mind and making me anxious. I couldn't keep calm no matter how hard I tried and I guess it's not helping Andrea who's already going through enough grief.

"I'm sorry. I just… I don't trust Jenner."

"I don't either. You were right when you said he wasn't telling us everything. What do you think this decontamination is?"

"I can't say for sure but it sounds bad, like really bad. The clock Dale pointed out doesn't help and the generators going off can't be good."

"So you don't think we're safe here either?" She lets out a sigh. "Nowhere is safe anymore. Nothing is ever going to be the same…" She says sadly. I know that tone of voice, I've heard it before. My mom had the same voice and sad look about her after my dad died. It took years of treatment to get her slightly normal again but it never fully went away. Andrea had depression… and me freaking out might send her over the edge.

"Look. Maybe I'm over reacting. Rick and the others will probably come back with everything solved."

"No now you're acting like Dale and the others. All sorry for me and treating me like a bomb about to go off." I let out a sigh.

"I am sorry about Amy. She was a friend and I know what it's like to lose family. It's like someone rips out your heart and stomps on it over and over and you don't know how you'll get rid of the pain… the truth is you don't though. It never goes away, you just deal with it until it becomes bearable."

"I can't though… not when there's nothing left to go on for."

"I can't believe that. There's still something left. But even if there is or isn't that's not what I'm surviving for, what I'm living for."

"That because you think your sister is still out there. You still have hope. I don't."

"Andrea… wait… did you hear that?" I ask.

"What are you talking about?" I go up to air vents and reach towards them. No air is coming out of them like I suspected.

"The air went off."

"I'll go see if anyone else is having problems." She says.

She barely opens the door when the room goes pitch black. The lights are out too. Okay no air and now no lights. Not good. Not good at all. I walk past her talking to Dale wanting to know answers. I knock on Jenner's door and he opens it.

"Dr. Jenner can you tell us what's going on now?" I demand more than ask.

"Why is the air off?" Carol asks as he starts walking down the hall ignoring me. "And the lights in our room?"

"What's going on?" Daryl asks coming out of his room with a bottle in his hand. "Why is everything turned off?" Jenner grabs the bottle from him.

"Seriously? Now is not the time for drinking!" I say to both of them. "What the hell is happening?"

"Energy use is being prioritized." He says nonchalantly and takes a drink.

"Air isn't a priority?" Dale asks.

"And lights?" ask Daryl.

"It's not up to me. Zone 5 is shutting itself down." The lights in the hallway turn off.

"Hey! Hey, what the hell does that mean?" Daryl asks starting get tired of all this shit. "Hey man, I'm talking to you. What do you mean it's shutting itself down? How can a building do anything?

"You'd be surprised."

"You can't avoid us forever! If this affects us we have the right to know what's going on!" I say repressing the urge to hurt him. Rick and the others show up.

"Jenner, what's happening?" He asks.

"The system is dropping all the nonessential uses of power. It's designed to keep the computers running to the last possible second. That started as we approached the half-hour mark. Right on schedule." He points to the clock that says we only have thirty-one minutes left until decontamination. We reach the center of the control room. Jenner takes one last sip before he holds the bottle out for Daryl who takes it back angrily.

"It was the French." Jenner said randomly.

"What?" Andrea asks.

"They were the last ones to hold out as far as I know. While our people were bolting out the doors and committing suicide in the hallways, they stayed in the labs till the end. They thought they were close to a solution."

"What happened?" Jacqui asked

"The same thing that's happening here. No power grid. Ran out of juice. The world runs of fossil fuel. I mean, how stupid is that?" Well we can't exactly go back in time and switch to solar power now can we?

"Let me tell you..."

"To hell with it, Shane. I don't even care." Rick interrupts Shane who was trying to follow Jenner. "Lori, grab our things. Everybody, get your stuff. We're getting out of here now!"

"More than happy too!" I say as we go to the exits. An alarm starts blasting real loud though and a red light is flashing. It causes us to stop in our tracks.

"_30 minutes to decontamination."_

"What the hell…" I say. The alarms are starting to freak me out. I feel clammy, out of breath and just want to get the hell out of here.

"Doc, what's going on here?" Daryl yells.

"Everybody, y'all heard Rick. Get your stuff and let's go! Go now! Go!" Shane yells at us. You don't have to tell me twice though because I bolt towards that door. My heart is pounding and I feel a relief as I get to the steps and see the door only to have it crushed when a glass barrier comes out of the ground.

"He just locked us in!" Glenn yells.

"No! No no no!" I yell and run towards the exit. I bang on the glass but it's solid. Way more solid than ordinary glass too.

"You son of a bitch." I turn around to see Daryl running towards Jenner.

"Shane!" Rick yells at his partner to get Daryl.

"You let us out of here!

"Daryl that won't help!" I shout as I watch him struggle against Shane and T-Dog who were holding him back. He looks like he's about to throw the bottle at Jenner.

"Come on." Rick says to me as he walks towards the others with me following him. "Hey, Jenner, open that door now."

"There's no point. Everything topside is locked down. The emergency exits are sealed."

"Well, open the damn things!"

"That's not something I control. The computers do. I told you once that front door closed, it wouldn't open again. You heard me say that. It's better this way."

"What is? What happens in 28 minutes?" Jenner turns back to his keyboard. "What happens in 28 minutes?!"

"You know what this place is?!" Jenner finally snaps. "We protected the public from very nasty stuff! Weaponized smallpox! Ebola strains that could wipe out half the country! Stuff you don't want getting out! Ever!" he looks like a madman as he catches his breath. Once he does he sits back down at his computer. "In the event of a catastrophic power failure... in a terrorist attack, for example... H.I.T.s are deployed to prevent any organisms from getting out."

"H.I.T.s?"

"Vi, define."

"_HITs... high-impulse thermobaric fuel-air explosives consists of a two-stage aerosol ignition that produces a blast wave of significantly greater power and duration than any other known explosive except nuclear. The vacuum-pressure effect ignites the oxygen between 5,000° and 6,000° and is used when the greatest loss of life and damage to structures is desired."_

Everyone was in shock now. Families were holding on to each other and people were crying. My eyes were watery but I was too angry to cry.

"It sets the air on fire."

"You're going to fucking blow us up! You think that is better for us than letting us go! You're sick!" I shout at him.

"There's no pain. An end to sorrow, grief... Regret. Everything."

"Look around you!" I shout as I wave my hand towards the group. Rick, Daryl and Glenn head back towards the exit. "Does it look like this is causing no pain or grief? Do those tears that the kids are shedding sound grateful for what you have done? You trapped us here promising us safety and you're going to kill us!"

"I didn't trap you here!" he yells at me. "I told you that once those doors close there was no going back and you all stayed. And I am offering you safety. You'll never have to be afraid anymore."

"I'm more afraid right now than I ever was out there! I still had hope while I was out there!"

"Natalie…" Dale comes up to me. "Step back, he won't listen to anyone now." Dale says. I look to see Jenner has completely zoned out.

"I just… I want… I promised… we can't die here. " My voice sounds hoarse. I can't breathe right.

"I know. Just try to breathe. You're having a panic attack."

I try to take deep breaths but I'm just sobbing. The tears are finally starting to flow down my face. I failed… I failed my sister… failed my promise to protect the group… I failed myself to do whatever I could to survive. Everything was taken away from me and I have no idea how to fix it. I can't fight my way out this, not without wanting to kill the only person who could release us. I've haven't felt this helpless in a long time. Not since my grandfather flat lined in the hospital and child services ripped me out of my sister's arms to put me in the system. All I can do is watch the guys pound on the glass and try to stop this panic attack. Daryl throws his bottle at the door only for the bottle to smash into a million pieces.

"Open the damn door!" he shouts.

"Out of my way!" Shane runs to the door with an ax and starts hitting it.

"Daryl!" T-Dog throws an ax to Daryl and the two continue to try to break the door down.

"You should've left well enough alone." Jenner says us those that are still close to him. "It would've been so much easier."

"Easier for who?"

"All of you. You know what's out there... A short, brutal life and an agonizing death." He looks at Andrea "Your... your sister... what was her name?"

"Amy."

"Amy. You know what this does. You've seen it." He looks at Rick. "Is that really what you want for your wife and son?"

"I don't want this."

"Some of us aren't ready to give up that easily. I have a sister out there that I made a promise I would find no matter what happened. If I give up here that means I'm breaking that promise and depriving myself of knowing I did everything I could to find out what happened to her." He looks at me with his crazy eyes. They actually have a hint of sadness in them.

"A promise…"

"Can't make a dent." Shane says resting over the computers. I guess they stopped.

"Those doors are designed to withstand a rocket launcher." Jenner says snapping out of whatever he was thinking of earlier.

"Well, your head ain't!" Daryl yells as he goes to swing his head at him.

"Whoa! Whoa!" Most of us shout as we go to stop him. Dale, T-Dog Rick and I go to stop him.

"Daryl! Daryl!"

"Just back up! Back up!"

T-Dog manages to get the ax out of Daryl's hands as we push him away from Jenner. Okay now I really have to question my sanity if this is the type of guy I have drunken dreams about.

"Really Daryl? How many times are you going to try that?"

"Thought we agreed I wasn't gonna stop? Specially since he won't let us out of here!" He yelled the last part then went back to pacing. I stay close by in case he breaks again, my panic attack long gone.

"You do want this." Jenner said to Rick. What? "Last night you said you knew it was just a matter of time before everybody you loved was dead."

"What? You really said that?" Shane asked Rick. "After all your big talk?"

"I had to keep hope alive, didn't I?"

"There is no hope." Jenner says. "There never was."

"There's always hope. Maybe it won't be you, maybe not here, but somebody somewhere..."

"What part of "everything is gone" do you not understand?" Andrea interrupts.

"Listen to your friend. She gets it." Jenner says. "This is what takes us down. This is our extinction event." The crying seems to get louder if that's even possible.

"This isn't right." Carol says while holding Sophia close. "You can't just keep us here."

"One tiny moment... a millisecond. No pain."

"My daughter doesn't deserve to die like this."

"Wouldn't it be kinder, more compassionate to just hold your loved ones and wait for the clock to run down?"

"Will you shut the hell up already?" I yell at him. "None of your self-righteous bullshit is helping anyone feel better. If you were really a genius you would see that."

The sound of a gun being cocked gets out attention. Shane was coming up with his shotgun aimed at Jenner's head.

"Shane, no!" Rick yells at him

"Out of the way, Rick!" he yells and ignores the people trying to stop him. "Stay out of my way! Open that door or I'm gonna blow your head off. Do you hear me?!"

"What are you not going to try to stop him?" Daryl asks me.

"I… don't care anymore. I'm tired of Jenner talking. I'm tired of waiting for the clock to run out… I'm tired of feeling like I failed."

"You're giving up? Who are you and what have you done with Falco?

"What else can I do? Whether or not Shane blows his head off we're still trapped here. I'm not a warrior or anything helpful Daryl… I'm just a girl who's finally starting to break after fighting it for so long."

"Aaaaaah!" we look up in time to see Shane start shooting the gun.

"...We all die! Shane!" I hear Rick yell but the shooting drowns him out.

"Get down!" Daryl yells grabbing me and crouching behind the computers.

"Shane!"

I put my hands over my ears as I hear the gun shots. Flashes of memories going through my head. I'm back in my old house hiding in the closet as I hear gunshots and my family screaming. Staring down the barrel of a gun after the man found me and pulled my out by my hair. He was clean shaven and neatly done hair but his eyes were blood-shot and rabid. I can't tell if I'm hearing Shane's gun or rehearing the sound of the trigger being pulled on me. I remember falling to the ground in pain, my vision cloudy as I watch my sister attack the man and my mother trying to stop them. My sister being thrown back and falling on me as he points the gun at her.

"Stop! Please stop!" I yell, I know I'm not really there but it feels too real. I watch in horror as my mother reaches for the gun as it goes off again... I want to run to her but I feel a pair of strong arms wrapped around me preventing me from moving.

"Nat! It's done!" Daryl says snapping me out of my flashback; he's holding me at arm's length now that the shooting has stopped. "You okay?"

I nod my head and get up with Daryl's help. I can't speak because I'm trembling so badly. Of all the parts of my life to flash before my eyes why did it have to be that? Why was it the most painful and agonizing day that I tried so hard to forget? I look to see Shane's on the ground with Rick standing over him holding the gun. Daryl let's go of me once I stop shaking.

"Are you done now? Are you done?" He asks Shane.

"Yeah, I guess we all are."

We all just stand there in silence. Wondering how the hell did we get here. How we've all gone mad in our last moments. Rick goes to T-Dog and hands him the rifle. I turn to see Daryl once again had the ax in his hands.

"… Get us out here…" I whisper to him. He nods his head and makes his way back towards the exit. I turn back to the group.

"I think you're lying." Rick says to Jenner.

"What?

"You're lying. About no hope. If that were true, you'd have bolted with the rest or taken the easy way out. You didn't. You chose the hard path. Why?"

"It doesn't matter."

"It does matter. It always matters. You stayed when others ran. Why?"

"Not because I wanted to." He looks at me. "I made a promise... to her." He points at the screen.

"You knew her… she wasn't just a random person who got bitten." I say confirming what I thought earlier. "was she…"

"My wife." He finishes the question I couldn't answer.

"Test subject 19 was your wife?" Lori asks.

"She begged me to keep going as long as I could. How could I say no?... She was dying. It should've been me on that table. I wouldn't have mattered to anybody. She was a loss to the world. Hell, she ran this place. I just worked here. In our field, she was an Einstein. Me? I'm just... Edwin Jenner. She could've done something about this. Not me."

"Your wife didn't have a choice." Rick said. "You do. That's... that's all we want... a choice, a chance."

"Let us keep trying as long as we can." Lori said.

"Please... all we have left is hope that we'll live to see another day…" I beg. "And who knows, maybe that day will be the one where all this ends." He takes our words into consideration then lets out a sigh.

"I told you topside's locked down. I can't open those." He goes over to the controls and presses a few buttons. I hear a noise and let out a relieved sigh knowing the door was open.

"Come on!"

"Let's go!" I hear Daryl and Glenn yell.

"Thank you…" I say to Jenner before I run off with the others. I catch up with the group only to turn back to see we were waiting for Rick and Jacqui was insisting on staying. She didn't want to end up like Amy or Jim. Dale isn't coming forward and I see Andrea hasn't moved.

"Dale…"

"Just go! Go!" he shouts at us.

"But Dale…" I try to go with him but I feel a strong tug on my arm.

"C'mon!" Daryl practically yells in my ear.

"Go! I'll be okay!" Dale says to me. I nod and run off with the others.

* * *

After quickly running to my room and grabbing as much of my stuff as I could we make our towards the entrance. The doors are still sealed though like Jenner said. I look around hoping that Dale would show up with Andrea by his side but he's not here.

"Get them doors open!" Shane yells. "Come on!" Glenn and T-Dog are trying but the doors won't budge.

"It doesn't work!" Glenn yells.

"Wait a minute! Wait a minute!" T-Dog says and goes to the keypad Jenner used the night before. "Try it! Try it! Try it now!"

But it still doesn't work. Daryl and Shane ran to the windows with their axes to try to break them open but just like with the door downstairs they won't open. I go stand besides Carol and Sophia watching the guys try to find an exit while also keeping an eye out for Dale and Andrea.

"Daryl, look out!" T-Dog says as he tries to break the window open with a chair.

It causes some cracks but it doesn't break it open. Shane then yells at him to get down so he can try to shoot it open. I grab Sophia and cover her as Shane shoots the gun and the bullets bounce off it.

"The glass won't break?" She asks.

"It's okay sweetie. We'll get it." I say letting go of her so she can go to her mom who was running up to Rick with her bag.

"Rick, I have something that might help." She says looking through the bag.

"Carol, I don't think a nail file's gonna do it." Shane retorts.

"Your first morning at camp, when I washed your uniform. I found this in your pocket."

She gives him a grenade and he goes to set it by the windowsill. I look back but still no sign of anyone else.

"Get down! Get down!" I snap out of it in time to drop to the ground as the grenade goes off with a loud bang and the glass shatters. My ears are ringing and I can already hear the sounds of the walkers outside.

"Come on! Let's go." I hear Rick say. Shane and Glenn jump out of the windows first to help the women and children go through. "Natalie! Time to go!" I hesitate for a minute. Are Dale and Andrea really staying behind? I know Andrea is depressed and Dale wouldn't want to leave her behind but would she really let him risk his life for her?

"Falco move your ass!" Daryl yells.

"… please make it." I mutter under my breath before running to the window.

Once my feet hit the ground I pull out my knife and start running with the others. The guys are in front shooting at every walker they could and I see Daryl decapitate one with his ax. A walker somehow makes it to me but i stab it in the eye socket and push it off me. We run pass the security booths and make it to the cars. The Grimes and Glenn get into the RV, while everyone else goes to their cars. I look back at the CDC hoping to see Dale but he's still not there.

"Come on…" I say worried.

"What are you doing?!" I hear someone shout and see Daryl running towards me. "We gotta go before we get blown up."

"Dale's still there! I can't leave him behind!"

"You can't die here either! I won't… look there he is!" He says pointing. From a distance I can see what looks like Andrea and Dale coming out of the broken window. I let out a relieve gasp when I see them. "Come on! Let's go!" he grabs my arm and leads me towards the end of the line were our cars were.

I hear the horn of the RV honk as Daryl opens the door to his truck. I was parked right behind him but I looked back to see Dale and Andrea ducking behind some sacks piled up on the ground. I try to go to them but I feel Daryl grab me by my arm and throws me into his truck like it was nothing. He pushes me down against the seats and covers me just as the CDC goes up in flames. For a whole minute all I could hear was a deafening blast and watched as the building was consumed in flames and fell apart. Then all that was heard was the fire burning and the two of us breathing heavily.

"You okay?" He asks me as he slowly gets off me.

"Yeah… thanks." I say as I carefully get up into sitting position. I feel my face grow hot as we stare at each other as we process everything that just happened. Dale! Are he and Andrea okay? I look out towards the window and see them on the ground still alive. Oh thank god!

"Don't do that again." He says abruptly as we watch Dale and Andrea get up. "Don't make me do that again."

"I can't help it... even if it hurts me I'll always try to help those I care about." I say and open the door to go to my car. "Are you going always to roughly haul my ass out of trouble every time that happens?" I ask him.

"I can't help it…" he says sincerely as I get out of his truck and quickly go to my car. I'm numb from everything that's happened but I can't help but feel small flutter in my stomach when he said that.

I take a couple of deep breaths to get over the stress of everything that happened. Our safe haven just got blown up and we were now left to fend for ourselves back on the road… but oddly enough I don't feel scared. The road has become where I feel most at home now. It's always been there for me; giving me a second chance and reminding me that I still have this path I need to continue. It's a dark and hard path filled with lost souls, broken dreams, and there's always a fear of the unknown every time I'm on it. But i take this path because of the I need to know what it holds, because even after all the pain and fear you experience on it there's always hope that it gets brighter towards the end… and you find who or what you are looking for… whether or not you knew that's what thought you needed in the first place.

* * *

**... well... we are now officially done season one. Sorry for the late update but once I again I had some distractions and I was also unsure of how to start and how to end this. I know that I wanted to do that dream sequence for a while because I thought it would be a fun way to test out how to write scenes like that without rushing the romance. And then the ending... well for me in the show that was just one of those powerful endings that doesn't really need words so its kind of hard to write it. I've probably written and deleted so much stuff for this one. I actually almost didn't put in the last paragraph but then it felt incomplete so I just said to hell with it and put it in. sorry if this one isn't as great.**

**Review Responses:**

**LadyCaysie: I'm glad you laughed at that part of the chapter because I was hoping that other people besides me found that funny! And thanks so much for passing along this story. It really does mean a lot and helps reassure me that I'm doing a good job. :)**

**Guest: Glad you enjoyed it :)**

**Guest: I had the same reaction and thought as you did. Once I found out the meaning I was like "oooh! yeah that makes sense!"**

**Marion: Glad you think it's cool and I think it's cool you reviewed in French! I tried to learn French because it is a beautiful language but i wasn't good at it.  
**


	21. What lies ahead

**Okay here is the begining of season 2! So in order to make it up to you guys for not posting on time I decided that I'm going to do shorter chapters instead of a whole episode, it's also easier for me so it's a win-win. **

**Reviews**

**HappyGoLuckyGirl: Glad you liked the chapter and here's the start of season 2! :)**

**LadyCaysie: I'm glad you like the way she woke up and yeah I did wonder if I let her off too easy after the dream. I tried to do something with that but wasn't happy with my results so I just decided to focus on the rest of the story. As for Daryl's POV I do plan on doing more sections with his point of view so be on the look out for that :)**

**Sevvus: I laughed really hard at the batmobile comment, I'm such a batman nerd I always try to quote to the Batmoblie whenever I can! :D As for updates I do try to get to the computer whenever I can try to update at least once a week. Thanks for reading and loving it!**

**Disclaimer: Still don't own Walking Dead... **

* * *

**What lies Ahead**

"_Okay don't peek!" _

"_Kind of hard to peek when you're covering my eyes Reese." _

"_Smartass! Okay keep them closed." She says._

_ I feel her take my hands off my eyes and walk down the steps to the streets. It was a hot Saturday and I was rudely woken up to her jumping up and down on my bed saying she had a surprise for me. I only had time to use the toilet and splash some water on my face before she dragged me out of the apartment while covering my eyes. This better be something pretty amazing like a unicorn, world peace or Jake Gyllenhaal proposing to me or I'm going to slap her for dragging me out in nothing but short shorts and a tank top with no bra on. _

"_Damn! Good morning to you girl!" I heard some guy shout. Yep, I want to go back in already._

"_Shut up asswipe! You must be this tall or this long if you wanna ride me or my sister!" Reese shouts back._

"_Ew! Reese don't bait them!" I say crossing my arms over my chest._

"_Don't worry he's gone. Just some douche trying to overcompensate. Okay! Open your eyes!" she shouts happily!_

_ I open my eyes to see my sister acting like she was a showgirl on game show presenting a grand prize. Although she was waving her arms at her crappy car that she bought before she left New York. I hear some guys whistling as they pass us and check out her ass to which I respond by flipping them off. _

"_So let me get this straight…" I begin my rant once those guys were gone. "You dragged me out of bed half-dressed, half-asleep to show me your car and get catcalled by some douchebags?" She puts her hands on her hips and cocks her eyebrow at me._

"_Really? You've been here for almost a month and haven't noticed I didn't have my car?"_

"… _I guess I didn't really think about it."_

"_Yeah otherwise you would have known that it was impounded and I finally saved enough money to get it back. But it's not my car anymore… it's yours!"_

"_Wait why is it mine now? You just got it back don't you want it?" I ask._

"_Well… I may have gotten my license suspended… but that's not the point! The point is that I missed a couple of your birthdays and I wasn't there when you got your license so I want to give you your first car. This is your first car right?" _

"_Yeah, the foster system wouldn't let me get my permit or license so I had to wait till college to get it. And since I always took the subway and saved money for food and clothes a car was that last thing on my mind."_

"_There we go! This is all yours!" She says and comes up to hug me. "I know it's not new or that great looking but I worked my ass off to get it back for you!" _

_ That does explain why she took extra shifts and would wear even more revealing clothes to work, trying to get more tips from drunk perverts. I hate that she has to resort to that stuff but I can't help but feel touched that she worked that hard so she can give me my first car. _

"_It is great Reese. I love it." I say with a smile and hug her back._

"_That's all I wanted." She says hugging me tighter. "I have a feeling this is our new start. That we can be happy together, starting with this car then we'll move on to getting better jobs and possibly new boyfriends!"_

"_Why are guys always on your mind? Besides so far it seems like the only options are those catcalling weirdos." _

"_Hey! You've just met some bad apples. I'm sure there's a charming southern gentleman out there waiting for you… or a certain pizza boy."_

"_You just won't let that one go will you?" _

"_Nope. Now promise you you'll take good care of this car."_

"_I promise. I'll take care of it until I no longer can…"_

* * *

And now here I am abandoning the very car I promised my sister I'd take care of and siphoning the gas for the RV. For the most part I did keep my promise, I can't take care of it anymore because the engine is about to die and there's no point in trying to fix it.

"Do you want help with your stuff Natalie?" I look up to see Dale hovering over me. He's grateful for the gas but he does feel guilty about how it was all I had left.

"I told you already Dale. I don't need a lot of this stuff. I just need to pick out some useful stuff, maybe a memento or two and travel light."

"Well I just want you to know a box or two won't be a burden. So if you change your mind just bring some stuff to the trailer." He says and he walks off.

I grab my backpack and a duffel bag and start filling it up. I put two t-shirts, two long-sleeved shirts, my leather jacket, a hoodie, two pairs of jeans, extra underwear, a pair of sneakers and my Polaroid camera in the duffel bag. I'm putting some weapons, a copy of _The Shining _and other essentials in my backpack when a box catches my eye. It's labeled bedroom and there's a familiar looking jewelry box that belonged to my mother and the photo album that the group looked at months ago. I open the jewelry box and see that it's filled with a collection of things Reese and my mom collected over the years. The fancy costume looking jewelry belonged to my mother while the more simple ones belonged to my sister. I don't care about any of those though. What catches my eye is a familiar silver chain with a pendant on it. It belonged to my father before he died. On the front of it is an illustration of Saint Michael the Archangel. His wings were spread out behind him and he was holding a spear to a snake. On the back was a dagger with a snake wrapped around it and the words protect us written above it. I push my braid off my shoulder and hook the chain around my neck.

After seeing that nothing else was important I close the lid of the jewelry box and pick up the photo album. I open it and I'm greeted by the picture of my family. The same one where my mom was holding me, my dad was next to her with Reese standing in front of him and my grandparents where behind them. I gently pull it out of the book and look at it.

"That your family?" I jump at voice behind me and the picture falls out of my hand. I go to grab it but the person behind me snatches it out of the air. I turn around to see its Daryl, I feel flustered that he snuck up on me (That dream really freaked me out and I get embarrassed when something happens that reminds me of it) and I have to regain my composure.

"Since when did you get so jumpy?" he asked me while handing the picture back.

"It's a pretty normal reaction when someone sneaks up on you."

"Well maybe you should be more alert. Have learned nothing while you were out here? Remember the last time you were looking for stuff in your car? Why do you even have all this shit in the back anyway?"

"Oh how can I forget the oh so wonderful day I met you and Merle? At the time I just thought my day was getting shittier when you guys pulled over to harass me. I already dealt with one sleazy asshole that day so I wasn't in the mood to deal with Merle." I see the confusion on his face as I talk. "My landlord wasn't the nicest guy. He was always harassing the girls in the building for rent money or we had to provide… other services. Little did I know that my sister was late with her share of the rent so I had to deal with the consequences."

"So you got kicked out for not putting out."

"How'd you know that? I didn't finish."

"You have half of your apartment crammed in there." He gestures to all the boxes scattered in my trunk and backseat. "Sides, since I've met you you've never taken shit like that from anyone. You probably beat the crap out of that jackass."

"I head-butted him pretty hard when he put his sleazy hands on me. Made his nose bleed. But because I didn't put out I had to get out. Not that it mattered in the end because either way I would have needed to get out of the city."

"But it made things easier didn't it?" he asked me. "Not having a place to call home to leave behind. No one back there you care about to leave behind."

"Huh… I never thought of it like that. I guess you're right."

"Damn straight." He says. I let out a small laugh at that and see a smirk on his face.

"Where did you call home? I know you and Merle said something about North Georgia but it sounded like you guys have been on the road for a while."

He made a face at that. Started biting his thumb nail and was avoiding looking me in the eye. I realize in that moment that other than the drinking story he told me at the CDC I really don't know much about Daryl. He always kept to himself about his past and the only things I knew for certain about him was he had a brother, he was ill tempered, a hunter and there have been some signs that he went through some tough times. But none of us ever really tried to get to know him.

"Doesn't matter." He muttered "Like you I didn't have one when this shitstorm happened."

"And before that?" I ask him.

"I had one. Just didn't like it… left it, met up with Merle when he got out of jail and left his biker gang. Some things are better left in the past."

"Yeah some things are…" I say and quickly flip through the pages of my photo album one last time. I land on the page I was looking for. The one of me and my sister at Coney Island.

"That her?" he asks. "The long lost sister?"

"Yep. That's her."

"She looks like she'd be your sister. Except she's got different hair, tanner skin, and metal in her face. She actually looks like a trashier version of you."

"Hey! She's not trashy and only I can say stuff about my sister like that!" I snap as I put the photo in my bag and throw the photo album back in the trunk. I put my backpack on, close the door to my trunk, sling the duffle bag over my shoulder, grab the gas canister and start walking to the RV. After handing over our canisters and my bag Daryl goes over to his truck and pulls the motorcycle out.

"Need help? I think last time you tried to pull it out someone ended up under it." I smirk remembering Merle pinned under it shouting every swear word in the book at his brother.

"I got it! Don't need some scrawny woman helping me." He says as he pulls it out of the bed of the trunk. "Grab my vest out of the car for me will you?"

I roll my eyes but go to open the cab of the truck anyway. Nothing's on the seat so I have to crawl in and look on the floor; sure enough there it was under the dashboard of the passenger's side. I grab it and hop back out of the truck.

"Catch." I say and toss it to him.

"Do you do everything half-assed?" he says as he catches it. I just shrug as he puts it on, I hate to admit it but he's probably the only guy I've ever met who can pull off a vest over another vest without looking like a major douche.

"Okay everyone move out!" Rick says and everyone starts going back to their cars. Daryl gets on the bike and I head back to the RV.

"Where you going?" he asks me.

"The RV with the others… where else?"

"Well if that's what you want. Have fun in you're hotbox!" He says and starts heading for the front of the line.

I'm confused by what just happened as I walk towards the RV. I climb in and take a seat at the table next to Andrea thinking over what just happened. It isn't until Glenn, T-Dog, Dale and Shane get in the RV that I realize that I probably just blew off riding on the back of Daryl's motorcycle by choosing the RV over him… son of a bitch!

* * *

"Looks complicated." Andrea said while watching Shane cleans his gun.

"The trick is getting all these pieces back together the same way. I could clean yours, show you how."

Ugh. I think I'm going to be sick from the flirty looks they're giving each other. Well Shane's is more flirty while Andrea still looks depressed but not as bad as usual. But still if I don't move now I'm going to be throwing up in the bathroom in a couple of minutes. I get up and walk towards Dale and Glenn at the front of the RV. I rest my arms on the back of Glenn's headrest and look out the window. I see Daryl driving in front of us on his motorcycle. God how I envy him right now. All free with the wind blowing against him, the adrenaline rush you get when you go a certain speed, and to think I probably could have been on the back of the bike if I had just thought to ask him!

"What's up Natalie?" Glenn asked me.

"Just getting restless."

"It's been a long drive." Dale said from right next to us. "Still have a while to go so I'd recommend finding something to keep you occupied."

"Trying. Believe me I'm trying." I start to fiddle with the pendant around my neck out of boredom. An old habit that I just could never quit.

"Oh Jeez." Dale's voice breaks me out of my trance and I look up to see a lot cars with open doors abandoned on the road and a large cargo truck on it's side.

"Damn. Can we get through?" I ask.

"Not sure… let's ask him." Dale says as we watch Daryl turn around and drive up to the RV. "See a way through?" Daryl nods his head and motions for Dale to follow him, he drives around the back of the RV and starts to lead us through the road. "Any chance there's a shortcut we missed?" I ask.

"Uh, maybe we should just go back." Glenn says while looking at the map "There's an interstate bypass—"

"We can't spare the fuel." Dale interrupts.

I guess he has a point. I just wish there was a scenic route we could have taken, something that looks a whole lot nicer than this. We slowly weave through the abandon cars following Daryl who is keep a close but not too close distance on his bike. This place really gives me the creeps. With all the abandoned cars and trash lying around it gave off an eerie vibe. It almost reminded me of one of those abandoned towns in western movies. All that was missing was some tumble weeds rolling across the road.

"Jeez." Glenn mumbles.

"Yeah." As I say this I see a barricade of cars blocking our way. "I don't think we can get through here."

Suddenly a clanking sound is heard and steam starts coming out of the engine blocking our view of the road. The engine is sputtering as Dale lets out a groan and stops the RV. Well… looks like I spoke too soon. Dale gets out of his seat with an angry look on his face and gets out of the RV with the rest of us following him.

"I said it. Didn't I say it? A thousand times. Dead in the water." He says as he walks to the front of it.

"Problem, Dale?" Shane asks while holding his gun and looking around.

"Just a small matter of being stuck in the middle of nowhere with no hope of—"

"Dale! Now is really not the time." I say as I point out where we are.

"Okay, that was dumb." He agrees with me.

"If you can't find a radiator hose here..." Shane says.

"There's a whole bunch of stuff we can find." Daryl said as he was looting the car in front of us with the window of its trunk open.

"I can siphon more fuel from these cars for a start." T-Dog said.

"Maybe some water." Carol said "Or food."

"This is a graveyard." Lori spoke up. We all looked at her in silence. "I don't know how I feel about this."

"We may not like it but we don't have any other options Lori." I speak up. "Besides, I think we need this stuff a lot more than they do." She gives me a disgusted look at that but I shrug my shoulders. It was true, she'll just have to get over it.

"Come on, y'all. Just look around, gather what you can." Shane says. I let out a sigh and pull out my knife.

"Careful around the bodies." I say as I follow the women.

We start looking through the windows to see which cars had stuff. I lift a tarp off the back of a truck and jump in to look through it. Box of clothes and other junk but no radiator parts or anything useful. I let out a sigh, jump off and check the other cars. I pass Daryl and T-Dog who are checking for gas in cars and check a car near Carol.

"How you guys doing?"

"Ok." Carol says focused on looking around. Sophia's clutching her doll tight and stays close to her mom.

"We're gonna go to the Grand Canyon." She says. I smile at how happy she sounded when she said that.

"Really? When did you decide this?"

"In the car. Do you wanna go with us?"

"Well it sounds like fun… tell you what. I'll think about it once we're done with this." She nods her head and goes to hang out with Carl. I look up at Carol who gives me a small smile. "It's amazing how cheerful kids are isn't it?" I ask.

"Yeah. Sophia has always been my little ball of sunshine. Sorry she put you on the spot like that though."

"It's okay. As long as she's happy I'm willing to say I'll go to the moon with you guys." She smiles at that.

"Thank you. You've been acting like the big sister she always wanted."

"I couldn't be her big sister. I'm too old to be your daughter." She lets out a small laugh at that. "I'm going to check those cars over there. Here take this knife, I can always use one of my throwers if I need to." She nods her head and hesitantly takes it before walking off.

I walk the other way closer to where T-Dog was and check a jeep. Sadly all that's in there is a some sandwich wrappers, an empty soda can and a bottle that had a yellow liquid I did not want to know what it was. I open the gas cap and smell for gas when I see something out of the corner of my eye. Walkers… a lot of walkers coming towards me. I drop to the ground as fast as I could and roll under the Jeep. I look up just in time to see a land right next to me on my left and I bite my lip to stop a gasp from coming out of my mouth. As soon as it goes away more walkers walk by me. I grasp a knife from my belt and pull it out. I hold it really tight in my right hand, readying myself for the worst case scenario. I start counting how many feet I see walking past me. Two, four, six, eight, ten… too many. There's so many… oh please let everyone be okay.

"Aaaah!" I hear scream come from up ahead.

The feet are gone and I feel numb. Oh god please don't let that be who I think it is! I start crawling out from under the car as fast as I could. I scrap my hand in the process but I don't care, once I'm out I look around and see Daryl dragging T-Dog. T-Dog's shirt is covered in blood and his arm is cut up really bad.

"What happened?" I ask going towards them and helping Daryl with T-Dog.

"I got cut… _huff…_ looking for gas." He's gasping and looks like he's in serious pain.

"You okay?" Daryl asked. "I heard a scream."

"It wasn't me…" I see the others gathered around the guard rail. Lori's holding Carol who's crying and everyone is looking out towards the woods.

"Need help over here!" Daryl shouted to the others. They looked over and Glenn came over to take T-Dog off me. I hear Carol sobbing.

"My baby… they're after my baby…"

My throat closes up. I can't breathe. I look out towards the woods hoping to see some sign of her but there's nothing. No… no this can't be happening! Not Sophia! I run over to them. Carol looks at me and starts sobbing harder. She reaches out for me and I catch her in a hug. I look over at Lori.

"What happened?!"

"Rick went after her." Lori said in shock. "She got out too soon, they came and she ran off into the woods. Rick went after her… she'll be okay." Carol sobs harder and I hold her tight, not believing what just happened.

* * *

It feels like we've been waiting for hours when really it's probably on been ten to twenty minutes. We were all by the guard rail waiting for Rick to return with Sophia. Daryl and Shane were standing on top of cars as look outs while the rest of us leaning against cars looking out towards the woods. No one was saying anything. We were all just waiting for Rick. We hear rustling coming from the woods and turn to look at the source. I grab one of my throwing knives just in case.

"Lori?" We heard a voice say from the woods. I put my knife back when I recognize Rick's voice.

"We're over hear." She says back and we watch him practically crawl back up the hill to us.

"Oh thank god." He says.

I look behind him but I don't see Sophia anywhere. He gets up the hill, breathing heavily but happy to see us. We're all silent waiting for him to say something but he looks confused about why we're so quiet.

"Where's Sophia?" he asks. "She's not back?" he asks.

"What do you mean she's not back?!" I almost shout at him. Carol starts crying again and drops to the ground. Lori and Andrea comfort her but I just stare Rick down. "What the hell happened?"

"They… they were after us." there is guilt in his eyes. "I grabbed her and ran to the creek. There was a spot for her to hide. I put her there, told her to come back here if I didn't come back and then led them away…" my anger lessens seeing how distraught he is but it's not enough to completely forgive him.

"Where? We got to go back for her!"

"Natalie don't blame Rick!" Lori tells me. "He tried to help."

"I'm not blaming him! I just want to go find her."

"I'll go back now!" he says to us. "But I'll take Shane and Glenn."

"But-"

"Come with me." He says to me and walks me away from the group.

"What are you doing! Sophia-"

"Please listen to me. I know you're upset and you have every reason to be, but I need you to watch the others."

"No I need-"

"Please! I know you care about her but I also know that you care about Carol and she cares about you. You can keep her calm, watch out for the others, and I'll feel more comfortable knowing you're keeping them safe."

I try to argue back but I can't. I see how sincere he is and I know he's right. The other women don't know how to fight and Carol is a wreck. Someone needs to stay behind and look out for them. Beside's I'm not good with the woods. It's not me territory, not like…

"Take Daryl with you and I'll stay. He knows the woods better than anyone and he's an expert at tracking. If she's not where you found her you'll need him with you."

He nods his head and we head back towards the group. I go up to Carol and rub her back while Rick tells the others to come with them. They leave and I tell the others I'm going in the RV for a minute. I go in and it looks like a hurricane hit it. I see the body of the walker Andrea must have killed when she was trapped in here and step over it to look for my bow. I look everywhere but I don't find it… well not everywhere. I let out a sigh and make my way over to the body, rolling it over and checking under it. Sure enough there's my bow… broken beyond repair.

…

…

…

"Aaaaaaah!" I start stomping on the body.

Angry that my bow is gone, angry that I wasn't looking for Sophia, angry that I wasn't there when she needed me. I stop stomping and sit down at the table. Sobbing and letting the tears fall down my face. Letting it all out now so that I can go out there and be strong for everyone. Letting out all the pain and guilt I feel for not being there when the people I care about need me. First Reese… and now Sophia.

"Natalie?" I look up and see Andrea at the door. I wipe my tears and stand up.

"I… came for my bow but it's broken." She looks down and cringes at the body.

"I didn't realize it was out. I just had to stop it. I was trapped in the bathroom and-"

"It's okay really." I interrupt. "You did what you had to do. I'll get rid of the body while you change and check on everyone." I say.

She nods and steps over the body towards the bedroom. Once the door is closed I pick the body up the armpits and drag it out of the RV. Blood drips onto my jeans from the stab wound to the head, it feels weirdly cold through the fabric. Once I drag it down the steps I drag it over to the guard rail and roll it down the hill. I start rubbing my necklace again as I start walking back to the others. This time however it's not out of habit. I'm doing something I haven't done since I was a kid. I was praying to anyone who would listen to let Sophia be safe.

* * *

**Yay! I got this done! Hope you liked it! Up next is the rest of Chapter 20 which may or may not have some scenes from Daryl's point of view. I'm thinking of doing more scenes from his point of view because season 2 had a lot of good Daryl moments, character development for him and I also realized that we get a decent look at how Natalie views Daryl but we haven't really seen what he thinks of her since before I started season 1. **

**Anyways if you haven't already feel free to favorite, follow and leave a review :)**

**Oh and in case you are curious here is a link to the pendant that Natalie has a similar version in the story: st-michael-pewter-medal-24-chain-i30838/**

**(I have problems putting links in but I checked and it works if you copy and paste that in the google search bar. Should be the first link)**


	22. Without a paddle

**Here it is! Don't give up on me yet! Lol sorry about the delays. Writers block hit me hard again but your reviews always, favorites and follows help encourage me and get me out of my slumps. Also I might be able to update more and be able to write on weekends because next week I get my own computer for my birthday! No more having to share! **

**Review Responses  
**

**HappyGoLuckyGirl: Yeah destroying the bow was a difficult decision for me but I think it will be interesting see her try her hand at different weapons. Also I don't want her to be too much like Daryl, there can only be one bad ass archer in the group! **

**Sevvus: Lol loving the batman quotes. As for what's gonna happen to Sophia... well I don't wanna spoil anything so you'll just have to keep reading. Sorry (Shrugs shoulders then takes off in the batmobile)**

**SkyiiiLifeee: Glad your liking it. Hope you enjoy the rest :)**

**SenSen-Chan: Here it is! Happy to know you love it :)**

**LadyCaysie: Don't go nuts! Unless they are peanuts, cashews or almonds cuz those are delicious. Okay gotta get my mind off food, here's the next chapter!**

**Guest: Your review just made it when I was finishing this up! Don't worry I am continuing this!**

**Warning: Contains graphic/gory descriptions, talk about religion(Nothing in this story is meant to be offensive) and some language.**

_Italics mean sounds  
_

* * *

WLA Part 2

Daryl's POV 

"Sure this is the spot?" I ask looking under the fallen tree in the creek. No little girl though, kid must of made a run for it, scared out of her mind.

"I left her right here." Rick said. "I drew the walkers way off in that direction up the creek."

"Without a paddle-seems where we've landed."

"She was gone by the time I got back here. I figured she just took off and ran back to the group. I told her go that way and keep the sun on her left shoulder." He said pointing at where Chinaman was standing.

"Hey, short round, why don't you step off to one side? You're mucking up the trail."

"Assuming she knows her left from her right." Shane said

"Shane, she understood me fine." I roll my eyes at their banter and keep looking for tracks.

"Kid's tired and scared, man. She had her a close call with two walkers. Got to wonder how much of what you said stuck."

"Got clear prints right here." I say to shut them up. "She did like you said, headed back to the highway. Let's spread out, make our way back."

We get out of the creek and start following the prints. We don't get too far until I realize something's up. I bend down to get a closer look at the prints. The highway was just up ahead but she went off the other way. Maybe officer douchebag was right and she was too scared to know her left from right.

"She was doing just fine till right here. All she had to do was keep going. She veered off that way." I pointed in the other direction.

"Why would she do that?" Short round asked.

"Maybe she saw something that spooked her made her run off." Shane said.

"A walker?" I shake my head

"I don't see any other footprints. Just hers."

"So what do we do? All of us press on?" Shane asked.

"No, better if you and Glenn get back up to the highway." Rick said "People are gonna start panicking. Let them know we're on her trail doing everything we can. But most of all, keep everybody calm."

"I'll keep 'em busy scavenging cars. Think up a few other chores. I'll keep 'em occupied." Shane said then left with Glenn. Leaving me with the sheriff to follow the prints, girl can' have gotten too far. So long as she didn't run into any other walkers she should be fine. If anything there's probably gonna be more drama at the highway than here…

* * *

Natalie's POV

"Okay move up a little bit." Glenn says while directing me.

Him and Shane came back early and told us to start moving cars out of the way while Rick and Daryl follow the trail Sophia left. Honestly I'm aggravated because it's just busy work to try to keep our minds off of worrying about Sophia but arguing about it won't solve anything. I don't want to upset Carol even more, the cars do need to be moved eventually so we can keep going and I just need to trust that Rick and Daryl are doing everything they can to find her. So for once I'm being a good girl and moving this van out of the way.

"That's enough get out now!" he says.

I jump out and watch as the car rolls into the grass that divides the two roads. It runs over an abandon motorcycle and stops once it hits a car on its side. I cringe as I hear the sound of metal being crushed and see that it looks more like an accordion than a bike. Turning around I see Shane in Carol's car helping Andrea push a red van that ran out of gas while Carol is still looking out towards the woods. Waiting for Rick and Daryl to come back with Sophia safe and sound.

"Nat?" I turn to see Glenn looking at me with a concerned look on his face.

"Sorry did you say something?"

"Do you need a break? You seem tired."

"I'm fine. Just… can you tell me anything?"

"We're on her trail." He says looking conflicted.

"Glenn…"

"Okay. Just don't tell the others." He said then got closer to me. "The tracks… they were coming towards here but she went off in a different direction. We don't know why but Rick and are going to find out… don't blame yourself."

"I'm not-"

"Yes you are. You're not a good liar."

"I just… let's get back to work." I say and go towards more cars. I see Glenn looks upset that I didn't open up but I can't. If I do I think I might just lose control. We start walking back to the RV with Andrea when we see Carol arguing with Dale.

"We're not going anywhere till my daughter gets back."

I take a deep breath and slowly make my way over there with Glenn and Andrea, dreading where the conversation is going. Lori puts down a crate she found in a car and walks up to Carol.

"Hey, that goes without saying."

"Rick and Daryl, they're on it, okay?" Shane says. "Just a matter of time."

"Can't be soon enough for me." Andrea says once we get there, giving me and Glenn bottles of water she picked up. "I'm still freaked out from that herd that passed us by, or whatever you'd call it."

"Yeah, what was that?" Glenn asked. "All of them just marching along like that."

"Maybe its animal instinct to form a herd." I say. "Jenner said that only the part of the brain with motor skills came back to life. They don't think, they just rely on their senses like smell to know who is or isn't one of them and hearing to know where all the action is."

"A herd. That sounds about right." Shane says not really listening to me. "We've seen it. It's like the night camp got attacked. Some wandering pack, only fewer… Okay. Come on, people. We still got a lot to do." We all start working again except for Carol who goes back to waiting.

"Hey, take a break." Glenn says to me. "I got this."

I nod and walk over to Carol. She doesn't look up at me as I stand by her side, she just keeps looking off into the woods waiting for them. I start scratching off the label of the water, unsure of what to do next.

"Do you want some water?" I ask her. "I didn't have any."

"I'm fine. Why'd you stop?"

"Glenn told me to take a break. Thinks I'm working myself too hard."

"You are… and I'm not working hard enough."

"Carol-"

"Don't." she interrupts me. "My baby is out there. We should be looking for her; I should be looking for her! Instead I'm just waiting here scared out of my mind that something happened to her and I can't help her."

"I get it. I do. I want to be out there just as much as you do because I love Sophia like a sister… it feels like I've lost two of them now." I say the last part softly hoping she couldn't hear me. She grabs my hand though and I look up at her and see sad eyes.

"I'm an idiot." She says in an apologetic tone. "I forgot that you're going through exactly what I'm going through. How do you do it?"

"I'm still trying to figure that one out honestly. It's like I'm on a roller-coaster of self-doubt, rationality, and hope. But I'm a different story, a much more complicated story. At least here we know where Sophia was last seen, she left a trail, and we got some of the best people to go looking for her. She's going to be back in your arms soon enough."

"So you believe in them?"

"I do. Rick's a good man, he didn't give up on finding his family, went back for Merle, wouldn't leave Glenn behind and he's not going to give up on your daughter. And Daryl is the best person I've met when it comes to tracking and survival. They aren't going to give up Sophia… none of us will." She's crying again as I say this but there's a hint of smile, showing that she does have hope.

"I believe you… so you really know Daryl huh? He's a good man, not like his brother?" she asks me.

"Honestly I think I just barely scratched the surface when it comes to knowing Daryl. But he's not like his brother. Sure he has an attitude and acts like a rude teenage boy from time to time but there is good in him."

God that sounds so cliché now that I think about it, but it doesn't mean it's not true. He always acts like a hard ass and like he doesn't care about anyone else but he did rescue T-Dog from walkers. T-Dog! The man who dropped the keys and left his brother chained to a roof-top. He also went with us to get Glenn back from the Vatos gang and has never failed to come bail me out of trouble. If anything, Daryl is probably one of the most caring people I've ever met next to Rick. It's just that unlike Rick, Daryl doesn't show it and probably won't ever admit it. But that doesn't matter, what matters is those two finding Sophia and bringing her back her.

I grab my necklace and start rubbing the pendant again. Hoping that if there is a God out there, he'd bring all of them back. That they'll just come out of those woods any minute.

…

…

…

God dammit! Where are you Dixon?

* * *

Daryl's POV

"Tracks are gone." Rick says breaking the silence. We've been after the trail for a while now in silence, listening for any signs of the girl or walkers.

"No, they're faint, but they ain't gone." I say and point in front of us. "She came through here."

"How can you tell? I don't see anything. Dirt, grass."

"You want a lesson in tracking or you want to find that girl and get our ass off that interstate?"

That shuts him up quickly and we start walking again in silence. It's a good thing so I can focus but it's also a little weird not having someone sass me back. A certain sarcastic, spunky brunette. Hate to admit but I've grown a little too used to having Falco around to make comebacks at almost everything I said. But even if she was here I don't think she'd be able to sass me back, she looked heartbroken when she found out Sophia took off. Her fiery spirit was gone and in its place was pain, anger and regret.

Almost like when we were locked in the CDC, where I saw a different side to her. Something feral, raw and genuine. The side that someone with inner demons tries to keep locked away. She was breaking down, and in that moment I saw the scared girl she'd hate to be. When Shane's gun went off she went someplace far away. Crying, screaming, scratching at me trying to get out of my grasp to get to someone who wasn't there, and when it stopped and she opened her eyes they were as big as a deer's. Filled with grief, guilt, hopelessness. She wasn't the Falco I knew but rather an entirely different person. And that person was threatening to come back, which is why the sooner we find this little girl the sooner everyone can pull themselves together and get as far away from that god damn interstate as we could.

_Whish… Crinkle... _

Me and Rick crouch down when we hear the sound of rustling leaves. He gestures towards the noise telling me that we should check it out. Slowly we make our way forward and below the ledge we're on there's a walker. He looks at me asking if I got a plan and I nod. I motion with my hand how he'll run to distract the walker while I go around it and shoot an arrow through his head. He nods and we put the plan in motion. He runs all the way around the ledge and down the slope putting himself in full view of the walker.

_Whistles_

The nasty son of a bitch lets out a roar and I shoot an arrow through its head before it can move. Dumb fucker. Probably the reason why the girl ran off. We both go up to it and I rip the arrow out from it's head. If he's here than maybe the girl isn't too far behind.

"Sophia!" I yell out. But all I hear is birds chirping as Rick bends down to look at the walker. "What are you looking for?"

"Skin under the fingernails." I get closer to look but don't see anything. He turns it over and I see blood around the mouth.

"It fed recently." He pries open the mouth and sticks his hand in there. "There's flesh caught in its teeth."

"Yeah, what kind of flesh?" I say looking at it. It's not big enough to tell.

"Only one way to know for sure."

He feels around for his knife and rips open the walkers shirt. But based on the look of the knife it doesn't seem as sharp as mine and a clean-cut guy like him probably doesn't have as much as experience as I do gutting critters. One wrong move and he'll probably cut what he ate.

"Here, I'll do it." I say standing over the walker and pulling out my knife. "How many kills you skin and gut in your life? Anyway, mine is sharper. Ugh!" The bastard's thicker than I thought he would be and I have stab him and carve him like a turkey a few times before I finally break through all the layers to the stomach. The look on Ricks face tells me I was right, the disgust in his eyes says it all.

"Now comes the bad part."

With my gloved hands I pry it open and start digging around for what it ate. The insides look black as coal and make squishing sounds as I feel my way through it. Rick starts gagging as I pull some of the crap out but I just roll my eyes. I've been gutting for most of my life and even though this was way messier than my usual kills I'm not gonna lose my breakfast over it. I hit something big, bigger than anything else I dug out of there. It's the stomach and it wasn't empty.

"Yeah, Hoss had a big meal not long ago. I feel it in there."

With a strong tug I pull it out of it's stomach and put it on the ground. Rick takes his knife and cuts it open. Digging around the mostly digested contents I stab a piece that has some teeth and hair on it. The teeth are long and the hair is short and coarse. Unless the little girl had buck teeth it wasn't her.

"This gross bastard had himself a woodchuck for lunch." I say looking at the mostly digested head on the end of my blade before I flick it off and get up. "At least we know."

"At least we know." Rick agrees and gets up.

"Come on. He was going this way. Probably find a trail that could lead to Sophia."

"Natalie was right about you." I stop and look back at him. What the hell did she say about me?

"What you talking bout?"

"She said you were an expert tracker and know the woods better than anyone else."

She actually complemented me for once? I feel like I should up at the sky and try to find flying pigs (actually it'd be nice to have some pork again). I glance up quickly but no hogs with angel wings are anywhere in sight. Well it was worth a try.

"That why you brought me?" I ask realizing why he decided to bring me.

"It was a good idea I wish I thought of on my own. Plus it was the only way to get her to stay behind with the others without putting up a fight."

That was surprising. As she said at the CDC she can't help but put her life at risk when someone she cares about is in danger. She cares about that little girl that's a no brainer but she also cares about her mother. So I guess in her mind if she had to stay behind with Carol then sending me out here would give her some peace of mind.

"Come on." I say to him. "Let's stop chit chatting and find that girl before it gets dark." I say and continue to move forward.

* * *

Natalie's POV

"Well it's not a bed but it'll do." I mutter to myself as I clear out a car to sleep for the night.

The RV was going to be full so I decided to take my bag and found the cleanest car I could. Luckily it was close to the RV and the guard rail so I have a good view of the road. I also offered to take shifts on top of the RV to look out for anymore herds. I really wish I had my bow though, because now I have to use one of the rifles if I'm up there and I even though I've had to use a gun a couple of times since the outbreak I still don't like them. Just thinking about them makes the scar on my chest sting. I rub at the area to try to soothe it and not think of it.

I turn around and look back at the group to take my mind off things. Dale and Glenn were at the RV, the others were scattered and Carol was at the guard rail. She still hasn't left her spot from before. I stayed with her as long as I could but then Shane told me to get back to work. I glared at him but Carol told me to listen to him. So bitterly I started doing anything I could to get him off my back. That was at least a couple of hours ago. Now the sun was starting to set and Andrea went over to check on Carol. I let out a sigh feeling uneasy about the fact that Daryl and Rick weren't back yet. What was taking them so long? Are they going to come back or do they need to spend the night in the woods looking for her? As much as I want to find her I don't want them to get hurt. If anything I'd wish they'd come back and I'll take over looking for Sophia with someone else.

"Hey Nat? Help me with these crates?" Glenn asks me from the car next to me.

"Mhm." I walk over and grab one of the crates, following him as we head towards the RV where it appeared to be Andrea was having a disagreement with Shane and Dale. I don't feel like eavesdropping though, I honestly don't give a shit or have enough energy to give a shit about anything other than Sophia.

"Oh God, they're back." I look up at Glenn's words and see Rick and Daryl walking out of the woods. Hastily I put down the crate and run over to where Carol was. Disappointment fills me when I don't see Sophia. I see Carol get upset again and I stand close to her in case she breaks down again.

"You didn't find her?" she croaks.

"Her trail went cold." Rick says as he steps over the guard rail with Daryl not too far behind him. "We'll pick it up again at first light."

"You can't leave my daughter out there on her own to spend the night alone in the woods."

"Out in the dark's no good." Daryl said. "We'd just be tripping over ourselves. More people get lost."

"But she's 12. She can't be out there on her own. You didn't find anything?" I reach out to comfort her but she moves away from me, feeling awkward and slightly hurt (Though I understand why she did it) I cross my arms.

"I know this is hard." Rick tries to calm her. "But I'm asking you not to panic. We know she was out there."

"And we tracked her for a while." Daryl adds.

"We have to make this an organized effort. Daryl knows the woods better than anybody. I've asked him to oversee this."

"Is that blood?" Carol asks looking them. Rick's shirt was covered in blood and Daryl had splatters on his clothes. I shudder thinking of what might have happened, thinking of the worse possible things.

"We took down a walker." Rick said.

"Walker? Oh my God."

"There was no sign it was ever anywhere near Sophia."

"How can you know that?" Andrea asked. Rick looked disgusted at the thought and looked over at Daryl for answers. The blood on his clothes… oh god!

"We cut the son of a bitch open, made sure."

I feel lightheaded as he says that, the mental image in my head disgust me. Carol is probably picturing the same thing and looks like she's about to pass out. I gently guide her towards the guard rail to sit down, making sure she doesn't faint. Lori sits down next to her trying to comfort her.

"How could you just leave her out there to begin with?" Carol says angrily at Rick. "How could you just leave her?"

"Those two walkers were on us." he says sadly but defensively. "I had to draw them off. It was her best chance."

"Sounds like he didn't have a choice, Carol." Shane says. I bite my lip at that. There must have been another way. There must have… it was just too hectic to realize it.

"How was she supposed to find her way back on her own? She's just a child. She's just a child."

"It was my only option. The only choice I could make."

"I'm sure nobody doubts that." Shane says.

"My little girl got left in the woods…" She starts to cry again.

Andrea and Lori swoop in to comfort her. I want to help but I just stand there, feeling numb. I look up at Rick and see the guilt in his eyes. I don't feel angry at him, he did do what he thought was best and the guilt he was feeling was painful enough. I don't even feel angry as he walks away from the group, not able to take the guilt much longer. I just make my way over to the car with my stuff in and sit down with my feet planted on the street. I see something sticking out of my bag and pull it out, it's the pieces of my bow I hastily put into my bag when I cleaned out the RV. I'm going to throw it away when I can, no use in keeping something broken.

"Shit, what happened?" I look up and see Daryl standing next to the car.

"Left it in the RV. Walker got in and stomped it."

"What'd I say about taking it everywhere with you?"

"Yeah, you were right." I say and throw the pieces far away from me.

"Why'd you do that… Natalie?"

"Sorry. I'm just…" I let out a sigh and take my hair out of the braid that's falling apart. "I'm glad you and Rick are back but I'm not in the mood to talk or banter with anyone."

"Fine." He says and turns to leave, but he doesn't leave. He looks over his shoulder at me; "This isn't you."

I stop running my fingers through my hair as he says this. "What isn't me?"

"This! The whole hopeless act. This isn't the girl I know, the one I…"

"The one you what?"

"Screw it." he says and walks towards my broken bow, picking up the pieces before walking away.

The one he what? What the hell does is that supposed to mean?

* * *

_*The Next Day*_

We were gathered around a car next to the RV waiting to hear about the plan to find Sophia. Dale, T-Dog and Carl are going to stay with the RV while the rest of us follow Daryl's plan and go look for Sophia. Rick comes up with a black pack and drops it on the trunk of the car with a loud thud.

"Everybody takes a weapon." Rick says unrolling the pack of Gerber weapons Carl found in a truck yesterday. It looked like it had four knives, two machetes, and an axe.

"These aren't the kind of weapons we need." Andrea says. "What about the guns?"

"We've been over that." Shane says from his place at the RV. "Daryl, Rick and I are carrying. We can't have people popping off rounds every time a tree rustles."

"It's not the trees I'm worried about."

"Get over it Andrea. There are more important things to worry about." I say losing my patience with her.

"I won't! We have just as much right to-"

"Enough!" Shane shouts. "Say somebody fires at the wrong moment, a herd happens to be passing by. See, then it's game over for all of us. So you do need to get over it."

"The idea is to take the creek up about five miles, turn around and come back down the other side. Chances are she'll be by the creek. It's her only landmark." Daryl says. Please be right.

"Stay quiet and stay sharp." Rick says. "Keep space between you but always stay within sight of each other."

"Everybody assemble your packs." Shane says to us.

I go over to my temporary car to grab my stuff, not needing anything from the Gerber pack. I put my belt of throwing knives across my waist, my knife in my tall lace up boot and put on a dark blue and magenta plaid shirt over my black tank top. On the floor of the car is my backpack with some arrows falling out of it. Shame I can't give those to Daryl, supposedly they're not as strong as his bolts to handle the stress of his crossbow. I grab the bag dumping the arrows out and put my hatchet in it, I should get something better to hold my knife and hatchet when I get the chance. Walking over towards the RV to say goodbye to Dale I overhear Rick agree to let Carl come with us. Carl walks away happily with his parents but I go up to Dale with an uncertain look on my face.

"Do you really think after what happened yesterday this is a good idea?"

"It's not our call Natalie. He's Rick and Lori's kid."

"Yeah well after what happened yesterday don't expect me to be comfortable with this. He doesn't know how to defend himself and he has a history of wandering off on his mom's watch."

"So long as everyone keeps an eye on him he should be fine and maybe he'll learn how to defend himself by watching everyone. You could be a good influence on him." Andrea comes up to Dale at this point and he lets out a sigh.

"Andrea, I'm begging you. Don't put me in this position."

"I'm not going out there without my gun." She says. "I'll even say please."

"I'm doing this for you." He says.

"No, Dale, you're doing it for you. You need to stop. What do you think's gonna happen? I'm gonna stick it in my mouth and pull the trigger the moment you hand it to me?"

"I know you're angry at me. That much is clear. But if I hadn't done what I did, you'd be dead now."

"Jenner gave us an option. I chose to stay."

"You chose suicide."

"So what's that to you? You barely know me."

"I know Amy's death devastated you."

"Keep her out of this."

"This is not about Amy. This is about us."

"And if I decided that I had nothing left to live for, who the hell are you to tell me otherwise? To force my hand like that?"

"Hey!" I interrupt. I know it's none of my business but I can't take it anymore.

"Look I'm sorry about everything that has happened to you but I can't keep my mouth shut anymore and being gentle with you isn't working. Dale cares about you; do you not realize how special it is to have someone care about you when you're falling apart? How many people get abandoned when something bad happens, even if they didn't bring it upon themselves and all you care about right now is yourself? Everything he's done is to help you even if it seems unfair and you don't realize it's what's best for you. And I agree with him. Until you can get yourself together you shouldn't have a gun, for fucks sake you barely knew how to use it when you had your shit together."

"Natalie it's my gun and my life! I have a right to it."

"Why don't you get your head out of your ass and realize that we aren't doing these things to punish you but because we care. Dale nearly gave his life to save you and I know you wish he hadn't. But the fact is that you're here so make the most of it. Help us find Sophia, and maybe help yourself as well. It's your decision but don't expect me to stay quiet if you hurt those I care about." I leave her looking dazed and Dale looking upset, walking towards the woods wanting to get this search started as soon as possible.

* * *

I remember a time where I used to like walking in the woods. Not that I did it a lot but when I could it was nice. A change of scenery from all the concrete and glass buildings, the honking horns and street noises, the unpleasant urban smells. It was quiet, peaceful, I could take my mind off things and be perfectly calm. Even back at the camp it was nice but now it's starting to feel more like a necessary evil. The sounds are no longer calming to me but make me anxious waiting for any sign of Sophia to come out.

After walking for about a couple miles we come across a tent. Daryl, who is in front of all of us, motions for us to be quiet and get down. We don't know who's in the tent or if it's still being used.

"She could be in there." Shane said.

"Could be a whole bunch of things in there." Daryl says approaching it slowly. Carol tries to get up but Rick motions for her to stop and I put my hand on her shoulder.

"Trust them. They gotta check to make sure." I whisper to her.

She nods and stays close to me, holding my hand tightly as Daryl, Rick and Shane approach the tent. Daryl stops the others and goes ahead, replacing his crossbow with his knife as he approaches the tent. He checks through the open flap but makes shrugs his shoulders, he's not entirely sure if something's in there.

"Carol." Rick softly calls out to her. I let go of her and she goes up to Rick with the rest of us following closely behind her.

"Call out softly." He says to her. "If she's in there, yours is the first voice she should hear."

"Sophia, sweetie, are you in there?" She calls out, no response. "Sophia, it's mommy… Sophia. We're all here, baby. It's mommy."

Still no response though. I walk over to Carol's side as Rick and Shane go up to the tent with their guns drawn. Daryl slowly unzips the tent and opens it. He and Rick gag and cover there mouths, all I can see from here is a chair with it's back turned to us with someone sitting in it as Daryl goes inside, the flap closing as he enters.

"Daryl?" Carol calls out.

"Daryl? What's in there?" I call out when he doesn't respond. He comes out of the tent.

"It ain't her."

"Then what's in there? There was something in the chair right?" I ask.

"Some guy. Did what Jenner said. Opted out. Ain't that what he called it?"

_Ring! Ring! Ring!_

Are those… church bells? We all look at each other before we start running for the source. If it was a church than maybe Sophia was hiding there, ringing the bells to signal for help. But that could also attract walkers.

"What direction?" Rick asks as we slow down, not sure where they are coming from.

"I think that way. I'm pretty sure." Shane says. "Damn, it's hard to tell out here."

"If we heard them, maybe Sophia did too." Carol says.

"Someone's ringing those bells, maybe calling others." Glenn says

"Or signaling they found her." Andrea says.

"She could be ringing them herself." Rick says.

"But if we can hear them than walkers probably can too so we got to find her first." I say.

We start running again, towards where we thought the source was coming from. We spot a clearing up ahead, a cemetery to be precise. There is a church in the distance but it's a small one compared to most, it doesn't even have a steeple where the bells would be.

"That can't be it. Got no steeple, no bells." Shane says echoing my thoughts.

"We should still check though." I say, Rick's one step ahead of me and keeps going. We all start running after him. Soon enough we're past the cemetery and Ricks running up the steps towards the red doors. I have my hatchet in on hand as he opens the doors. Inside there are three walkers sitting in the pews. Slowly they turn their heads, spotting us and rise out of their seats. Lori hands Rick her weapon, Glenn hands Daryl his and we slowly enter the church. Rick and Shane take out the two guys and Daryl takes out the woman.

"Sophia!" Rick calls out but there's no response.

"Where are the bells?" I ask looking around.

"Yo, J.C., you taking requests?" Daryl asks looking up at the cross.

"Think he stopped taking requests a while ago…" I mutter as I look around.

He gives me a look but before he can say anything the bells go off again, he lets go and races out the door with us following him. The source is coming from an intercom hooked up to the side of the building that Glenn disables. Damn, all that for a deathtrap.

"A timer." Daryl says trying to catch his breath. "It's on a timer."

"I'm gonna go back in for a bit." Carol says sadly and most of us follow her. As we enter the church she turns to me.

"Are you religious Natalie?"

"My family was, they raised me catholic. My parents and Grandparents would drag me to church every Sunday. I still hold most of those values but I didn't practice it much once they were gone. That was kind of a dark time for me…" She nods her head and gently grabs my pendant with her thumb and index finger.

"St. Michael?" She asks.

"Yeah. It belonged to my father. He claimed that the protector of heaven gave him strength every time he got deployed." She lets go of it and walks up towards the pews, taking a seat in the front one.

I walk over to the wall and lean against it, not really feeling like sitting. I grab my pendant again and look around the church, memories flowing through my head. Attending Sunday mass in a frilly dress I hated. My father's funeral, the tears rolling down my face as I stare at the casket draped with the flag. The vigil candles my grandmother would help me light to pray for those we've lost or needed help. Much of my childhood was spent in a church yet somewhere along the way I lost faith. The death of my loved ones, watching my sister lose her way without being able to help her, being bounced around from home to home, all of the negativity made me lose faith. I thought that the only person who was going to help me was myself, that no amount of prayers or candles was going to help me get by. But now, maybe something to believe in could actually be helpful. Because I don't think I can get through this on my own.

"Father, forgive me." Carol begins to pray, Lori comes in from outside and sits in the pew behind her. "I don't deserve your mercy. I prayed for safe passage from Atlanta and you provided. I prayed for Ed to be punished for laying his hands on me and for looking at his own daughter with whatever sickness was growing in his soul." I feel sick when she says that. God that bastard deserved it.

"I prayed you'd put a stop to it, give me a chance to raise her right, help her not make my mistakes. She's so fearful. She's so young in her way. She hasn't had a chance. Praying for Ed's death was a sin. Please, don't let this be my punishment. Let her be safe, alive and safe. Please, lord. Punish me however you want, but show mercy on her." She starts crying again and Lori comforts her.

I feel my eyes water as I push myself off the wall. The sound of Carol's sobs echo throughout the church, making the guys feel uncomfortable. I look ahead and see a box by the alter, curious I walk up to it and look in it.

"What are you doing Natalie?" I hear Lori ask me as I take out one of the objects inside.

A small candle in a little glass container, a vigil candle. I place it on the ground and grab the matches in the box. After a two failed strikes it finally catches fire, lighting the match that I use to light the candle.

"Father, please guide Sophia back to us." I say softly. "Let her be returned to her mother, where she belongs." I get up and walk over to Carol. She looks up at me with grateful eyes and gets up to leave. Lori and I follow her, meeting up with the guys who were waiting for us.

"Thought you said he wasn't taking requests?" I hear Daryl mutter at me.

"I did. But it doesn't hurt to try."


	23. Bloodletting

**Okay sorry in advance that this one is shorter than some of the others. I was thinking of combining episodes 2 and 3 to make it longer but then I realized I wouldn't have the story up in time because I'm going to see MockingJay part 1 tonight with my sisters. So I thought it would better to not keep you all waiting since you are all very supportive of me and the story.**

**Review responses:**

**LadyCaysie: Always good to hear from you :)**

**HappyGoLuckyGirl: Good to hear from you :)**

**Sevvus: Glad you like reading Daryl's POV! I was so nervous I would (pardon my language) fuck it up and make him OOC. Also your last sentence sums most of my thoughts during season 2, LET HER LIVE!**

**Deranged Dear: WELCOME! And yes I totally get the feeling of getting lost when reading something really good. Sometimes i'll forget where I am and think "How the hell did I get here?" It means a lot that this story can actually do that to someone reading it. Thank you for the compliments, I'm glad that some of the parts are funny because so times I wonder if anyone else can understand when I'm trying to be humorous and thank you for complementing my writing. :)**

**Disclaimer: Still don't own The Walking Dead. That honor belongs to Frank Darenbot for making the TV show happen and Robert Kirkman the creator of the comics, helps with the show and who is probably in hiding after the mid-season finale. (Not that it was only his decision, it probably wasn't. And wow did that death spark some outrage)**

* * *

Ch.3 Bloodletting

_Bang!_

I stop in my tracks as the sound echoes throughout the woods. Birds scatter and fly in the other direction trying to get away from the source. I feel panic rush through me. Rick, Shane and Carl separated from us to look for Sophia. It had to be them but what happened? Was there a walker that needed to be taken down? Was there an accident?

"Was that?" Lori asked with fear in her eyes.

"It was probably nothing." Daryl grunted. "Keep moving."

We start moving again but I'm almost in a trance. I keep waiting for another shot to be fired, worried that something bad had happened to them. We can't go through this again. Not with Sophia out there, we can't afford to lose any more people.

"Nat?" I look up to see Glenn looking at me concerned.

"Yeah?" He gets closer to me and starts whispering.

"I'm worried about you. Have you been keeping up with-"

"A lot has happened Glenn. Enough for anyone to get upset."

"I get that. I do, all of us do. But I just feel like I need to check on you since I think I'm the only one that knows about your… medication." He says the last part hesitantly.

"You haven't told anyone have you? Because it was hard enough to tell you in the first place."

"No! I swear I haven't. I wouldn't even know what to tell because you won't tell me what your condition is."

"My condition doesn't matter now. I'll handle it but my main concern is finding Sophia." He flinches by how harshly I say that. "Glenn… I'm sorry I-."

"It's fine, just take care of yourself. I don't want you to end up like… you know." He says I glance over my shoulder at Andrea. She hasn't been all rainbows and sunshine, if anything she was a pain in the ass earlier because Lori was given a gun instead of her when we split up.

"God, if I do I give you permission to slap the shit out of me until I snap out of it." I mutter to him. He didn't seem to hear that though, he was too busy looking behind us. I turn around to see Lori stopped moving and was looking towards where the gun shot went off.

"You still worrying about it?" Andrea asked.

"It was a gunshot." She responded.

"We all heard it." Daryl said.

"Why one? Why just one gunshot?"

"Maybe they took down a walker." He said, but I could tell even he didn't believe it.

"Please don't patronize me." She says, I see the panic in her eyes. "You know Rick wouldn't risk a gunshot to put down one walker, or Shane. They'd do it quietly."

"Shouldn't they have caught up with us by now?" Carol asked.

"You would think but maybe they found something that could lead them to Soph." I said. "Maybe two or three of us could double back and check on them."

"No. There's nothing we can do about it, anyway." Daryl says, rejecting my idea. "Can't run around these woods chasing echoes."

"So, what do we do?" Lori asks

"Same as we've been. Beat the bush for Sophia, work our way back to the highway."

"I'm sure they'll hook up with us back at the RV." Andrea says.

Lori looks reluctant but she just nods her head and starts walking again. We all start heading back for the highway except for Andrea, who went to talk to Carol.

"I'm sorry for what you're going through. I know how you feel." She says.

"I suppose you do." Carol says. "Thank you. The thought of her, out here by herself...It's the not knowing that's killing' me. I just keep hoping' and praying 'she doesn't wind up like Amy." Andrea looks stunned that Carol said that. I'm shocked and couldn't help wince when she said that.

"Oh, God!" Carol realizes what she said. "That's the worst thing I ever said." Andrea shakes her head, trying to brush it off but I can see it still hurts.

"We're all hoping and praying with you, for what it's worth."

"I'll tell ya what it's worth" Daryl says walking over to them. "Not a damn thing."

"Daryl stop it." I say not liking where this is heading.

"Stop what? Just saying what I'm thinking." He says to me before turning back to Carol. "It's a waste of time, all this hopin' and prayin'. We're gonna locate that little girl. She's gonna be just fine. Am I the only one zen around here? Good Lord." He says and walks away from them. I look at him in shock, did Daryl actually say something to comfort someone?

"What?" He asks me as we walk, noticing my stare.

"Nothing… just impressed that you know the word zen."

"Watch it Falco, you're running out of free passes to take shots at me."

"I had free passes? Since when? You know what never mind, thanks for what you said earlier. I thought it was going to go in a completely different direction."

"Someone's gotta be the voice of reason if no one else is."

"You're right. Guess we're just not as zen as you are." He rolls his eyes but I see some amusement in them.

"Good to see your old self again. But you only got one pass now."

"Fine. I'll save it for after we find Soph." I say actually believing my own words this time.

_(Some time later)_

"How much farther?" Andrea asked as we were heading back to the road. After looking for Sophia for as long as we could we decided to call it a day and go back to the highway before the sun sets. As much as I didn't want to stop looking I can't deny that my feet are killing me.

"Not much." Daryl says. "Maybe a hundred yards as the crow flies."

"Damn it. I must have missed that day in school where we measured distance in birds."

"Too bad we're not crows". Andrea says, obviously feeling tired. We're all tired though, so it was better to just stop complaining and keep walking for however long a crow flies. I wonder if there's a dictionary for all these redneck terms and expressions Daryl uses. That could be really useful.

"Oh...Oh! As the crow flies, my ass." I look over at the disgruntled Andrea ready to say something sarcastic when I see walker appear out of nowhere gaining on her.

"Andrea behind you!" I yell and start to run towards her. She turns around and starts screaming, holding out her arms to keep it away from her. I almost reach her when another walker appears and lunges towards me. I take my hatchet and smash it into the walker's skull, blood spraying all over my face.

"No-no!" I hear her scream,

"Hold on!" I yell to her, trying to pry my weapon out of the skull. It's stuck though and I have to push the walker down with my foot to pry it free. I look up and start running towards her when I see something running toward us.

"Whoa!"

The next thing I know the walker is on the ground and I have to throw myself to the ground to avoid being trampled to death. I look up to see a girl probably close to my age on a really big horse. She was holding a baseball bat, which must be how she took care of the walker.

"Lori?" She asks looking at us. "Lori Grimes?" behind her demon horse I see the others run towards us.

"I'm Lori." Lori speaks up.

"Rick sent me. You've got to come now." She says.

"What the hell is going on?" I ask confused on how she knows Rick and what was so important that I nearly got run over for.

"There's been an accident. Carl's been shot." I feel myself tense as she says that, the scar on my chest starts to hurt again. Oh god, that shot from earlier. "He's still alive but you've gotta come now. Rick needs you. Just come!" I don't move as Lori takes off her backpack and makes her way to the horse.

"Whoa-whoa-whoa! We don't know this girl." Daryl protests. "You can't get on that horse." But Lori doesn't listen to him. She's almost in a daze as she gets on the horse.

"Rick said you had others on the highway, that big traffic snarl?" The girl asks Glenn.

"Uh-huh." Glenn says looking stunned.

"Backtrack to Fairburn road. Two miles down is our farm. You'll see the mailbox, name's Greene. Hi-yah!" She whips the reins and the horse takes off, leaving all of us in shock over what just happened. I hear a wheezing noise and look over to see the walker sit up. The blow to the head didn't kill it, just broke its nose and probably stunned it.

"Shut up." Daryl says and shoots it in the head. "Come on, you're alright." He says as he bends down to help me up. I don't even protest, I just let him help me up and grab my hatchet off the ground.

"Here, got a little something everywhere." He says handing me a rag before going over to help Andrea. She refuses his offer though and gets up on her own, walking back in the direction we were going.

"Come on, we should tell Dale what happened."

* * *

"Dale! T-Dog!" I yell as I run up the hill and step over the guard rail. Dale sees me and walks over, rifle in his hands thinking there was danger.

"What happened?" he asks seeing how upset I look.

"I knew something bad would happen, I just didn't know it'd be this."

"Natalie, you're not making sense. Please tell me what happened." I open my mouth but I can't say it. He looks over towards Glenn who was just coming up the hill.

"Carl's been shot." He says.

"Shot? What do ya mean shot?" Dale asked.

"I don't know, Dale. I wasn't there." He says as he steps over the guard rail, the others were closely behind him. "All I know is this chick rode out of nowhere like Zorro on a horse and took Lori."

"You let her?"

"Climbed down out of my asshole, man." Daryl says. "Rick sent her. She knew Lori's name and Carl's."

"I heard screams." He says looking at me and then Andrea. "Was that you?"

"She got attacked by a walker." Glenn said for her as she walked past Dale. "It was a close call."

"Andrea, are you all right?" She turns around, shakes her head no and gets in the RV slamming the door behind her. He lets out a sigh and then turns back to me.

"Is that blood on you Natalie?"

"I tried to save her. But this other walker came after me and I had to kill it. I wasn't fast enough… my hatchet got stuck and by the time I got to her I almost got trampled by that demon horse."

"Don't dread on that. Everything turned out alright. Both of you are safe and that's what matters."

"Yeah…"

"Sorry to interrupt." Glenn says. "But that girl said that she was taking Lori to a farm. That if we backtrack to Fairburn road there's farm with the name Greene on the mailbox two miles down."

"Do we really think we can trust them?" I ask.

"If Rick does then I think we can."

"How can we trust Rick's judgment? Don't get me wrong, I trust him most of the time but his son has been shot, maybe by someone from that farm, and it sounds like Carl isn't doing well, no parent can possibly think rationally when something like that happens!"

"You really think it was them?" Carol asked.

"Who else? It's not likely two cops would shoot a kid by accident." Daryl says joining the conversation. "Probably one of them. Whether it was by accident or not we don't know yet."

"Let's not make assumptions." Dale says. "They're survivors, like us, that's all we really know. Now it sounds like they are willing to help us, it may be our best option so let's all talk about this and make a decision."

After getting Andrea out of the RV we started talking about what to do. Dale feels we should go to the farm and reunite with the others but Carol doesn't want to leave Sophia out here. I don't really want to go just yet either. I don't want to be further away from where we last saw her and I can't stand to go see Carl in pain. I'd much rather stay here and keep an eye out for Sophia then just be sitting around helplessly waiting to hear if he'd be okay.

"I won't do it" Carol says. "We can't just leave."

"Carol, the group is split." Dale tries to reason with her. "We're scattered and weak."

"What if she comes back and we're not here? It could happen."

"I agree with Carol." I said. "She wouldn't know where we went. I'm not saying all of us need to stay here but I'm willing to wait another day."

"If Sophia found her way back and we were gone, that would be awful." Andrea says.

"Okay." Daryl says. "We gotta plan for this. I say tomorrow morning is soon enough to pull up stakes. Give us a chance to rig a big sign, leave her some supplies. I'll hold here tonight, stay with the RV. You still wanna stay Nat?"

"Yeah, I'm staying."

"If the RV is staying, I am too." Dale said.

"Thank you. Thank all of you." Carol says.

"I'm in." Andrea says.

"Well, if you're all staying then I'm—"

"Not you, Glenn." Dale interrupts him "You're going. Take Carol's Cherokee."

"Me? Why is it always me?"

"Because I know better than to think I can change Natalie's mind. No matter how much I wish I could talk her into going with you."

"Not this time. Sorry Glenn."

"You have to find this farm, reconnect with our people and see what's going on. But most important, you have to get t-dog there. That is not an option." We look over at T-Dog, he doesn't look too good leaning against the RV with a blanket draped over him.

"That cut has gone from bad to worse. He has a very serious blood infection. Get him to that farm. See if they have any antibiotics. Because if not, t-dog will die, no joke." I look over to see Daryl walking towards his motorcycle, looking for something out of his bag.

"Keep your oily rags off my brother's motorcycle." He says throwing said rag at Dale, he then puts down and goes through a clear plastic bag filled with pill bottles. "Why'd you wait till now to say anything? Got my brother's stash. Crystal, x.

"Ugh gross. Pretty sure that melts you're brain."

"That explains a lot. Don't need that. Got some kick ass painkillers." He throws a bottle to Glenn. "Doxycycline." He throws a bottle to Dale. "Not the generic stuff neither. It's first class. Merle got the clap on occasion." Why am I not surprised?

After giving T-Dog some pain meds and antibiotics we put him in the back of Carols Cherokee. Glenn reminded us of the directions to the farm and then drove off. It was getting dark so we decided to call it a night. Andrea was taking the first watch and after a couple of hours I would take over. Since there were less people here I could actually sleep in the RV.

"Think you could take the bed for a while." Daryl says and gestures out the window to Carol who was once again looking out towards the woods. "She won't be in for a while. I'll take the floor after I scout the area."

"Okay, just wake me up for my watch or if she comes in early. She needs it more than me."

"Kay. Hey, what was that about? When you heard about Carl, you looked like you were in as much pain as he probably is." God, why does he always have to be so observant?

"It wasn't a good idea to bring him."

"You're not answering my question." I let out a sigh. How can I tell this? I can barely think about it without getting upset.

"You know how I don't like guns right?"

"Kind of put two and two together."

"Let's just say I had bad run in with one."

"What the hell does that mean?" he asks, I look at him pleading for me not to tell him but by the look on his face he seems to figure it out.

"You mean you were-"

"Yeah. When I was a little younger than he was."

"How?"

"Home invasion. I actually don't really remember too much. I kind of blocked out the whole thing because I couldn't handle everything that happened."

"What kind of no good asshole shoots a little girl?"

"I think you answered your own question. But that's why I'd rather stay here, I can't go there because all I'd be able to do is sit around and just keep thinking about the pain he's in, the pain I once went through. I don't know if my reasoning makes any sense or if I'm just being selfish for wanting to avoid him for as long as I can but here I feel like I'd be doing something useful."

"Gonna have to face them eventually."

"I know, and I will. But at least he's got his parents with him, not like little Soph. I can't imagine what it's like out there in the woods all along at her age." He looks pained as I say this, but then he shakes his head, snapping himself out of it.

"Don't talk like that. She'll be fine, we're all looking for her and she'll be back safe and sound. Just get some rest, you're no good to her if you're tired."

He walks out of the RV to scout the area like he promised. He really hasn't given up since he started looking for her and as much as I like that I can't help but wonder why. Why is this so important to him? Why is he so insistent that she's going to be alright? And why does it seem like this seems isn't just about finding Sophia but something else? Something deeper?

* * *

**And that's all for now! As you can probably tell Natalie is starting to become more weary of other people and still feels slightly uncomfortable about opening up to her own group. Think she'll ever get over that? Or will it take someone/something else to get her more open? Stay tuned to find out!**

**P.S on my profile page their is a poll for new story ideas. Just some ideas floating around in my head that I thought you might be interested in. It'd be great if u guys would take a look at it and maybe vote. **


	24. Save the last one

**A/N: OMG this story has reached over 100 follows since the last post! (applause! fireworks! crying!) Okay maybe that was a little over dramatic but serious I was over the moon to see that. I can't believe that I first published this almost four months ago and its done this well. I want to thank everyone who has read it, favorited, followed, and commented. It really does mean a lot to me. Oh off topic but the poll on my profile for other story ideas is still open. I'll probably give it until a little after the end of the year before I close it, nothing is guaranteed to happen immediately or if I'll go through with it I just want to know what sounds better for the future and it also gives me a little idea of what else you guys like. **

**Review Responses:**

**LadyCaysie: Haha I love happy dances and I'm especially happy you liked that she opened up a bit because I was really unsure if that was the right moment or not.**

**Guest: Aw I love that moment when you see that there's multiple updates a story. More to read! Hope you enjoy this one.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Walking Dead.**

**Okay this one is NOT IN NATALIE'S POV AT ALL! Giving her a break and exploring oh never mind I'm just keeping you from reading now! **

* * *

Ch. 4 Save the Last One

Daryl's POV.

_*Flashback*_

"_Dad?... Dad are you here?" _

_I called out from the front door of the trailer. No one answered though, maybe he was out there looking for me. I was covered in dirt, had a lot of scratches on my body and was tracking mud into the house. He was going to be pissed. "How could a kid that was practically raised out in the woods not find his way back home for nine days?" he would say while holding his belt. Well, I might as well enjoy being back home while I still can._

_I go to the small kitchen area and open the fridge. There's a six pack of beer, a jar of pigs feet, some type of meat wrapped up from the butcher, cheese, mustard, and a jar of pickles. I look over at the counter and see a loaf of bread left out. Okay, looks like I can make a sandwich. I grab the meat, cheese, mustard and pickles and bring them over to the counter. I practically had to juggle all of the stuff so it wouldn't fall. My stomach growled as I was making the sandwich. Eating berries for nine days doesn't fill you up much. As I sit down on the couch and turn on the TV the door burst open and the devil walks in._

_"Turn that shit down! I'm going to bed!" he yells at me. _

_I obey and turn the volume down. He looks me over taking in my appearance._

_"What the hell happened? Did ya have to play football at school or did ya take a tumble out in the woods?" _

_I just blink at him. Is that really the first thing he says to me after being missing for nine days? _

_"Ya know what I don't care. Spending a whole week with hard liquor and that busty waitress from the diner got me dead on my feet. So keep your trap shut or I'll whoop your ass." _

_He stumbles towards the bedroom and slams the door shut._

_..._

_He wasn't out looking for me, he didn't even know I was gone. I was nothing to him..._

_(Sobbing…)_

I open my eyes_, _the sound of sobbing snapped me out it. It was a sound that didn't belong there, no one would cry over me going missing. I look over to see Carol on the bed, crying in her sleep. I hear a clicking sound and see blondie playing with her gun. She kept loading it and unloading it. I let out a sigh. Well, looks like I'm not going to get any sleep. Might as well do something useful. I get up and grab my crossbow off of the booth.

"I need my clip now." Blondie hands me my clip, wondering what I'm gonna do proabably.

"I'm gonna walk the road, look for the girl." I look over to see Carol stopped sobbing. She was looking at me. Probably with a mixture of gratitude and pleading with me to find her. I nod my head at her, telling her I'm gonna try my best before I head out of the RV.

"Daryl? Where you going?" I look up and see Natalie and the old man on the roof of the RV. Thought she would have gone to sleep by now.

"I'm coming too." I look to see blondie come out of the trailer.

"I'm going for a walk." I tell the duo on the roof. "Shine some light in the forest. If she's out there, give her something to look at."

"You think that's a good idea right now?"

"Dale." Andrea glares at him and stomps off.

"Falco aren't you supposed to be off by now?" I ask shining my light on the girl. Her eyes looked heavy and I could see faint dark circles around them.

"She was." Dale said before she could respond. "But she wouldn't leave when I came to take over her post. I've been trying to get her to sleep but I've been having no luck."

"I'm not tired. Not yet anyway."

"Have you seen yourself lately? You look like a giant raccoon with those circles under your eyes." She flips me off, doesn't even have enough energy to think of a comeback. Fuck, this whole thing with the kids really messed her up.

"Oh for god's sake. Natalie do you wanna come with us?" Andrea asks walking back towards us. "Three sets of eyes are better than two and you'll probably be able to sleep once we get back." I glare at her, damn woman should have just kept her mouth shut. Natalie was strong, a lot stronger than I thought she was, but she wasn't immortal. She needs to rest. Andrea just shrugs her shoulders though, not getting intimated by me like most people would.

"What? I thought you'd be okay with it since you two are thick as thieves."

"Don't know what you're talking about." She lets out a scoff.

"Sure you don't."

"Be careful girls." I hear the old man shout and look over to see Natalie was now on the ground walking towards us.

"We going?" She asks. I pinch the bridge of my nose in frustration and nod my head. What the hell am I getting into with these women?

* * *

"So… you couldn't sleep either huh?" Andrea asked Natalie. Natalie looked over at her, surprised Andrea was talking to her. Normally it wouldn't have been unusual but considering how she tore blondie a new asshole today it was weird that she wasn't being bitter towards her.

"Um, no. You either?"

"Haven't been able to for a while."

"Yeah… thanks for inviting me…"

"Sure…"

"Andrea… about earlier…"

"It's fine, I'm not mad at you." Natalie has a puzzled look on her face now, Andrea looks like she wants to say more but she's having trouble getting it out. "I… think we should talk about this later." Natalie nods her head and they continue to look in silence. It seems like both of them want to bury the hatchet but they don't know where to start. It also doesn't help that they're both stubborn women and neither one of them feels comfortable making the first move. So it's going to be a cold day in hell when they finally settle this.

"You really think we're gonna find Sophia?" Blondie asks breaking me out of my train of thought. For fuck sake has everyone given up already?

"You got that look on your face same as everybody else." I say pointing my flashlight in her face. "What the hell's wrong with you people? We just started looking."

"Well, do you?" Andrea counters.

"Daryl." I point my light towards Natalie, she's trying to look serious but I see the pleading look in her eyes. "I need an honest answer. I want to believe she's okay but I have no experience with this stuff. Do you really think that she has just as much of a chance out there with little experience?"

"Shit Falco make up your damn mind already! It ain't the mountains of Tibet. It's Georgia. She could be holed up in a farmhouse somewhere. People get lost and they survive. It happens all the time."

"She's only 12." Andrea said.

"Hell, I was younger than her and I got lost."

"Wait. You did?" Natalie asked becoming interested.

"Yep. Nine days in the woods eating berries, wiping my ass with poison oak."

"They found you?" Andrea asked.

"My old man was off on a bender with some waitress. Merle was doing another stint in juvie. Didn't even know I was gone. I made my way back though. Went straight into the kitchen and made myself a sandwich. No worse for wear. Except my ass itched something awful."

They both start snickering. I glare at them and they start laughing harder. Natalie looked like she was close to tears she was laughing so hard, her smile was actually reaching her eyes.

"I'm sorry." Andrea says trying to control herself. "I'm sorry, that is a terrible story."

"Yeah it sounds pretty bad, even if the mental image is really funny." Natalie says, she barely finishes the last sentence before she starts laughing again. Andrea laughs again and I even laugh a little bit. Can't help it, Natalie just has one of those laughs that's contagious. Doesn't matter how stupid or unfunny the joke is, so long as she's laughing she could make someone else laugh.

"Only difference is Sophia's got people looking for her. I call that an advantage." They both stop laughing after that. Andrea walks ahead and Natalie takes her place beside me.

"So that's why you're so adamant that she's alright. You know from experience." She says to me, I tense up seeing how she's watching me. Trying to read me and get an idea of what's going on my head.

"If I could make it so can she."

"Well of course you can. You're practically the Tarzan of Georgia expect you have a crossbow and don't wear a loin cloth."

"Is that a complement or a crack?" she shrugs her shoulders. "Ya know what doesn't matter. She'll be fine. She's got all of us looking for her. This is where you're stubbornness actually helps, anyone would be glad to know that you were looking for them."

"Even you?" I look at her expecting to see a smirk on her face but instead I see she's dead serious.

"I can take care of myself."

"I don't doubt that. Not at all. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't go looking for you." She looks ahead, even though it's dark I swear I see her face turn pink. I feel like I should say something to stop this awkward silence but I can't. I have no idea how to respond to that.

"Come on." She says nodding towards Andrea. "After that Walker incident earlier I think we should keep a closer eye on her."

"Yeah…" I say and we go to catch up to her.

* * *

The sound of rustling leaves stops us. I raise crossbow towards the source, Natalie has one of her knives in her hand and Andrea with no weapon looks to us for guidance. I nod my head and we slowly make our way towards the source. There's a camp set up but it looks like no one's using it, the sounds are coming from the tree. We creep closer to source and come face to face with the ugly mother fucker making all the noise.

"What the hell?" There in the try was a walker hanging by it's neck with a noose. I hear someone gagging behind me but I'm too focused on the note attached to the tree.

"Got bit. Fever hit. World gone to shit. Might as well quit. "Dumbass didn't know enough to shoot himself in the head. Turned himself into a big swinging piece of bait. And a mess."

"Maybe he didn't have much time to figure that out." Natalie said. "I'm not an expert at this but based on how rotten he looks he probably got bitten around when the outbreak first started."

Andrea groans, she sounds like Merle did anytime he had too much to drink and snort.

"You all right?"

"Trying not to puke."

"Go ahead if you gotta."

"Better out than in." Natalie says looking uncomfortable. "Fair warning though I don't do too well around puking people."

"No, I'm fine. Let's just talk about something else for a minute. How'd you learn to shoot?" she said while panting. She wasn't going to feel better until she puked.

"Gotta eat. That's one thing these walkers and us have in common. I guess it's the closest he's been to food since he turned. Hanging up there like a big piñata. The other geeks came and ate all the flesh off his legs." Sure enough the sound of retching starts and Andrea tosses her cookies. Natalie puts her hand over her mouth to stop herself from gagging.

"Seriously Daryl?" she glares at me once she gets ahold of herself.

"I thought we were changing the subject." Andrea says while wiping her mouth.

"Call that payback for laughing about my itchy ass."

"There wasn't a lot that came up."

"Guess that's one benefit of having to ration the food." Natalie says.

"Let's head back." I say and turn around to head back for camp.

"Aren't you gonna..." I turn around to see what Andrea was talking about. She was looking at the walker, wanting to put it out of its misery.

"No. He ain't hurting nobody. Ain't gonna waste an arrow either. He made his choice. Opted out. Let him hang." I try to leave again but I don't hear them following me. I turn and see Andrea walk towards that walker pinata, it's struggling more than ever as she approaches. Getting and louder and louder with each step.

"Andrea this isn't worth it." Natalie tries to reason with her. She's got her knife out and I see her debating about throwing it. She only has a few of those and it'd be a waste to lose it.

"You want to live now or not?" Andrea turns to look at me.

"Daryl what are you-"

"It's just a question." I cut Natalie off.

"An answer for an arrow. Fair?" I nod my head.

"I don't know if I want to live or if I have to or if it's just a habit."

"Not much of an answer." But I keep my promise and shoot the sorry bastard between the eyes.

"Waste of an arrow." I say and turn to Natalie. "Put that knife away, gotta save your best weapon." She slides it back into her belt and we make our way back to camp.

* * *

"Will you actually sleep now?" I ask Natalie once we're on the highway weaving through cars.

"Yeah but that piñata is probably going to haunt my dreams."

"Just hit it real hard and imagine candy and booze falling out of it." She rolls her eyes at that.

"Don't make me sick again." Andrea moans.

"Got anything left?" Natalie asks her. Andrea shakes her head and moans. I chuckle a little bit which gets me a glare from Andrea. As we get closer to the RV I see Dale waiting for us.

"Looks like the old man is waiting to punish you for breaking curfew." We get to RV and climb in, except for Andrea who was talking to Dale outside.

"Well, night Dixon." Natalie says and sits in the passenger seat. "What?" she asks turning to look around and locks eyes with me.

"Still unsure about the farm?" I ask her.

"It just sounds too good to be true. Look what happened to the camp and the CDC. We haven't had the best of luck."

"I doubt the farm has a-what was that thing called again?

"Decontamination?" she guessed. "Yeah I know but I just don't want to get my hopes up."

"We're only staying there till Carl's better and probably until we find Sophia. Just get some sleep and worry about the other stuff later."

"Yeah, you're right." She says and leans her head back against the head rest closing her eyes. I walk back to my sleeping bag and see Carol sit up on the bed.

"Thank you." She says to me.

"You don't have to keep saying that. I'm going to find her."

"I am grateful for you trying to find Sophia, but now I'm actually thanking you for Natalie." I guess I had a confused look on my face because she kept talking. "Natalie has been nice to us since we first met her. Sophia sees her as the sister she always wanted and I care about her well-being. So knowing you're around to keep her grounded makes me worry less about her." She looks over my shoulder at the chair Natalie is sleeping in. "I need to think that both girls are strong enough to get through this."

She heads back to the bed and lies down. I lay down and let sleep takeover. I dream about being in the woods, looking for the girl. I can't find her even in my dreams but I keep looking. For her and the people that are looking for her, I can't give up until I find her.

* * *

**Okay something a little different. That flashback is just my way of trying to get an idea of how he must of felt when he was a kid. Let me know what you think.**


	25. Cherokee Rose

**Review Responses:**

**HappyGoLuckyGirl: thank you!**

**Guest: thanks! Glad you liked the flashback.**

**Hayleyjun13: Glad you love the story and the flashback! Means a lot lovely.**

**LadyCaysie: Oh man! I never had poison oak before but I can only image how bad it is, poor thing. Glad your still enjoying the story.**

**lahnirose: I'm so glad you like Natalie! I find her character fun to write for.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Walking Dead. **

* * *

Ch. 5 Cherokee Rose

"Do you really think this is good enough?" Carol asked as we looked at the car. We left a sign for Sophia on the windshield of a car telling her to wait here for us if we were gone and some supplies to hold her over.

"It should be enough to hold her over and we'll be sure to come back here as much as possible." I say trying to reassure her.

"Right. Once we find out how Carl and everyone else is doing we can focus on Sophia."

"Right. C'mon, The sooner we get there the faster we can get back on track to looking for her." She nods her head and heads over to the RV.

It feels wrong leaving but I know it's inevitable. It's not safe here, the group is split up and it's possible that Sophia wandered off closer to the farm. Besides we've been here for three days, if she hasn't found her way back by now then she's probably hiding somewhere waiting for someone to find her. Ideally anyway, I still can't accept anything bad happening to her as a possibility. I won't.

"Falco!" I snap out of it to see a hand being waved in front of my face.

"Really? Is that necessary?" I ask swatting it away and giving Daryl an annoyed look.

"Got your attention didn't it? We gotta go."

"I know." I look over at his bike. Working up the nerve to ask him if I could ride with him to the farm. I figure I might as well enjoy the ride even if I'm not looking forward to the destination.

"You been on one before?" he asked me noticing what I'm staring at.

"A long time ago. Dad used to take me for quick rides when mom wasn't around and I dated a guy that had a bike. Turned out his bike was more interesting than he was."

"Let me guess, you stayed with him long enough to get a couple good rides out of him." I slapped him on the arm for that. "I meant the bike not- never mind. Come on ya nympho."

"You're an ass." I say but I follow him anyway.

I got on the bike behind him but wasn't sure where to put my hands. Wrapping my arms around him seemed too intimate but putting them on his shoulders seemed too flimsy. Before I could decide though Daryl grabs wrists and puts my hands on hips. Well that makes things easier I guess. He revs up the bike and we take off, so fast that I lurched forward. My chin hits his shoulder and I grip his waist tighter. Something he notices and turns around to check on me before looking back to the road. Okay Nat, pull yourself together! You've never fallen off a bike before and we're not going to start now. Don't make him think you're one of those giddy girls who lose it over guys with bikes!

Once I get used to the speed my fears of falling off lessens and I start to enjoy it. The wind blows against me sending this amazing tingling sensation through my body. I feel myself smile as I look around, taking everything in as we pass by it. We rode off the highway and were now on a dirt road in the woods. I don't know how close we are to the farm but I really couldn't care less at this point. I didn't care where we were going, hell I wouldn't care if we missed the farm and drove all the way to Virginia. All I wanted was to enjoy this feeling. Because right now it felt like none of my problems existed. There was no outbreak, no missing girls, no hurt boys, and no pain. Just me, the road... and Daryl.

"What are we looking for again?" Daryl shouts over the noise. Sadly this feeling can't last forever.

"Fairburn road!" I shout. "Two miles down. Look for a mailbox that says Greene."

He nods and turns right. Soon enough the farm comes into view. A big white house waiting for us down the end of the dirt road and an old looking wooden barn off to the side. We pull up and Daryl stops the bike and turns it off. I swing my leg off the bike and get off on the left side of it, taking a good look at everyone as I get off. I see Glenn and what appears to be Shane walking with a limp. I almost didn't recognize him because he his head is shaved and he's wearing overalls, looked more like a country bumpkin than a douchey cop. Next to Glenn was a teenage boy, a pretty girl with big blue eyes and blonde hair, and the brunette girl we met yesterday. Rick, Lori and T-Dog came out of the house with an elderly looking man and a woman with blonde hair. Rick and Lori look like they haven't gotten any sleep.

"How is he?" Dale asks, breaking the silence.

"He'll pull through." Lori says looking close to tears. I let out a deep breath, relieved to hear it. "Thanks to Hershel and his people."

"And Shane." Rick says and looks over at his partner. "We'd have lost Carl if not for him." Shane looks awkward as Rick says this. Actually he looks a bit off. I'm probably reading into it too much though, he's probably in shock over what happened to Carl.

Dale lets out a sigh and goes to hug Rick. Carol smiles for the first time in a long time and goes to hug Lori.

"Thank God." She says. "We were so worried."

"How'd it happen?" Dale asked.

"Hunting accident." Rick said. "That's all... Just a stupid accident." Everyone else still looks upset though. Shane is fidgeting awkwardly where he stands. Something else was up. I have a bad feeling in my stomach.

* * *

After being introduced to Hershel, Maggie, Patricia, Beth and Jimmy we were soon led to a funeral for one of their own. His name was Otis and he was the one who shot Carl. He felt so bad about it that he offered to go with Shane to get medical supplies at the school to save him, dying in the process. I didn't know the guy, never even got to meet him but I can't help but feel respect for him. It takes a lot of guts to own up to your mistakes and try to make it right. I can't even be angry at him anymore for shooting Carl. He redeemed himself.

"Blessed be God, father of our lord Jesus Christ." Hershel was overseeing the funeral. People were placing stones on the grave. I just stood off to the side in silence with everyone else. It feels awkward to mourn a man I never met but I stay, out of respect.

"Praise be to him for the gift of our brother Otis, for his span of years, for his abundance of character; Otis, who gave his life to save a child's, now more than ever, our most precious asset. We thank you, God, for the peace he enjoys in your embrace. He died as he lived, in Grace. Shane, will you speak for Otis?"

"I'm not good at it." Shane says looking uncomfortable. "I'm sorry."

"You were the last one with him." Patricia pleaded "You shared his final moments. Please. I need to hear. I need to know his death had meaning."

"Okay." He muttered before speaking up. "We were about done. Almost out of ammo. We were down to pistols by then. I was limping. It was bad. Ankle all swollen up. "We've got to save the boy." See, that's what he said." He has a distant look in eyes. Like he's reliving what happened.

"He gave me his backpack. He shoved me ahead. "Run," he said. He said, "I'll take the rear. I'll cover you." And when I looked back..."

Wait… that doesn't make sense. Shane brought Otis's gun back. He couldn't have covered him without it… I look up in time to see him limp his way to the grave.

"If not for Otis, I'd have never made it out alive. And that goes for Carl too. It was Otis. He saved us both. If any death ever had meaning, it was his." He places a rock on Otis's grave.

Almost everyone looked touched by Shane's speech. Except for Dale who was looking at Shane suspiciously and Daryl who was always hard to read. I don't know if Dale's thinking what I'm thinking but Shane's story sounds like bullshit. And the way he's been acting strange and the look in his eyes looks like a man on the verge of a breakdown. Everyone starts leaving now, I walk away but I still can't help but watch Shane. I'm afraid that if he is breaking down someone's going to get hurt.

"You're Natalie right?" I look to my side to see Maggie walking beside me.

"Yeah."

"I wanted to apologize about yesterday. Nearly ran you down with my horse. I thought you were one of them for a second." She said bluntly. I think she was referring to the walkers.

"Huh, I thought I was looking wild but didn't think I looked that bad." She laughs a little but stops herself. "Don't worry that was a joke. I have a weird sense of humor."

"Well I laughed so I guess that makes two of us." We both laugh at that.

"Don't worry about the horse thing. I probably scared it even though it terrified me."

"You afraid of horses?" She asked

"I'm a city girl. And I have a fear of animals that are bigger than me."

"Well I can teach to ride sometime if you like, won't be too scared of it once you try it."

"Maggie!" We look over to see Hershel standing by Rick and a truck. "Can you get a map for us?"

"Sure thing!" She shouts back before turning back to me. "See ya around." She says before going back inside.

"Damn it." I hiss.

"What?" Glenn asks coming up to me.

"I think I'm gonna like her."

"What's so bad about that? She seems nice." Glenn says while watching her.

"Yeah but I don't want to form any more attachments. All I want to do is find Sophia and get back to heading to Fort Benning." My mind flashes to Amy, I got too close to her and now she was dead. I don't want to go through that again, not if I can avoid it.

"Oh. I guess that's a good point." I look up at him, he's still watching her with this puppy dog look in his eyes.

"Holy shit you like her!" I exclaim in shock.

"No! It's not like that! Come on help me set up the tents." He says going to the RV. I smile while following him. Thinking about all the ways to tease him.

"Oh come on Glenn. It's okay, I just said not to form any attachments. But if you find her attractive and want a booty call I'm not going to stop you."

"Keep your voice down!" He panics and hands me a tent. I wasn't even talking that loud, wow he's like a little boy with a crush. "I'm not doing that. I would never… not with everything going on!"

"Even if she agreed?" We stop and start putting the poles down to set them up. He looked deep in thought about what I said.

"Come on. It's not totally unbelievable. And are you telling me you don't find her somewhat attractive?" I say gesturing towards her as she heads to the truck Hershel, Rick, Lori, Shane and Daryl are surrounding. Glenn opens his mouth to say something but nothing comes out. I smirk knowing I won. "See!"

I stand up but suddenly feel nauseous. My head starts to spin and my vision feels blurry. I hear Glenn asking me if I'm okay but I can't respond. I feel like if I speak I'm going to throw up. I hold up my hand telling him to wait, in a few seconds my vision is clear and I don't feel as sick.

"I'm fine. Just stood up to quickly. Anyway if you don't take a shot at her I just might have to."

"Wait what?" his jaw drops. Well that certainly distracted him!

"Don't worry, I'll let you watch."

"You're… you're joking aren't you?" he asks. I roll my eyes.

"Duh." We finish putting up the tent when Maggie comes over to us.

"I hear you're fast on your feet and know how to get in and out." she says. I choke on my laughter at Glenn's face. Oh this is perfect timing!

"Uh…" Glenn stutters.

"I'm sorry, we just talking about… never mind! What do you need?"

"Got a pharmacy run. You two in?"

"Sorry. I was going to go looking for Sophia."

"Oh, that guy you rode on the bike with said he was gonna work his way from the creek."

"He did huh?" I let out a sigh. "Should of known that son of a bitch was going to try to look on his own. I'll have a word with him but you two should definitely go, what do you say Glenn?

"Uh..."

"Miss," Glenn is saved by Dale interrupting him. "What's the water situation here?"

"Got five wells on our land. House draws directly from number one." She points towards the wells that were behind Dale. "Number-two well is right over there. We use it for the cattle but it's just as pure. Take what you need. There's a cart and containers in the generator shed behind the house." She looks at Glenn again. "I'll go saddle your horse then."

"Horse?" Glenn looks at me and Dale confused.

"Well have fun Glenn. Gonna go look for Soph." I say and walk away.

* * *

"Daryl." I hear Rick call out. I jog around the side of the house and towards the two men. Rick was standing close to the house while Daryl was heading out.

"You okay on your own?" Rick asks him.

"I'm better on my own." He replies.

"Is that so?" I say while approaching Daryl. "Too bad because I'm coming with."

"No." Daryl says sternly.

"What the hell? You said last night that my stubbornness is what's going to help me find her."

"Not if you're wearing yourself out. How many times do I have to tell you that before it gets through your thick ass skull?"

"You do look tired Natalie." Rick says concerned.

"Tell you what. I'll take the whole day off tomorrow if I go today."

"Come on Natalie. We're just concerned about you." Rick says.

"Doesn't stop her." Daryl says. "But she does keep her promises."

"So I can come?" I ask.

"Like I'd be able to stop you. We'll be back before dark." He says to Rick and we start to walk away.

"Hey!" Rick shouts and we look back. "We got a base. We can get this search properly organized now."

"You got a point or are we just chatting?" Daryl asks.

"My point is it lets you off the hook. You don't owe us anything."

"My other plans fell through." Daryl turns his back on him and walks away. I let out a sigh.

"He's not doing it because he owes us Rick. He's doing it because it's what's right." And for another reason but I don' want to admit it to Rick, it's just a theory and it's too personal to just blurt out to everyone. "He's not like Merle. You don't have to worry about him." I turn my back on him jog to catch up with Daryl.

* * *

"We gotta get ya a better weapon." Daryl says referring to my hatchet. We were walking through the woods and just had a scare. Heard a noise and thought it was a walker, I just got a proper grip on my hatchet when a possum ran off. Daryl wanted to kill it but I reminded him that we weren't hunting, we were looking for Sophia.

"I'm trying to make do with what I have. I miss my bow but I can't get it back."

"Ya got too used to using that thing. Now you're rusty with fighting up close."

"Well what are you suggesting?" I ask getting irritated, I hate when people point out my flaws. I just want to know how to improve, not dwell on them.

"Get some practice with that thing, if you don't improve we'll find ya something else."

"Think I could try your crossbow sometime?" I ask. He gives me a glare and I shrug my shoulders. "Worth a shot."

We exit the woods and find an old-looking house. It was a white house with a dirty looking red roof. The sides of it are tarnished looking and some vines were crawling up the walls. Daryl takes his crossbow off his back and loads it, I grip my hatchet tightly and we make our way to the house. He kicks the doors open and we cautiously walk in. The floorboards creaked under our feet. I tense as we look around, wary about any possible threats. He takes the lead, pointing his crossbow in each room ready to fight. After checking the first two rooms I see that the back door is open. I motion to the room closest to it, saying that I'll take that one while he takes the other one. He nods and we head towards our objectives. Sadly my room was empty, it didn't even have any furniture. I turn around to see Daryl pick something up from the trash can and sniff it. I look closer and see that it's a can of tuna, freshly eaten from the looks of it.

"You think…" I barely get to finish my thought when we hear a door creak.

We look up to see a door partly open. Daryl drops the can and lifts his crossbow up, going towards the door. He quickly opens it. It's a pantry. It has a few cans of food but on the floor was a pillow and a blanket. The pantry was very small, only a child could sleep in there. Someone around Sophia's size or smaller.

"She was here!" I say happily.

"Might still be around." Daryl says.

We start calling out for her. We looked upstairs and around the outside of the house. There's no response though. My heart sinks when I realize she wasn't here. I sit on the steps, thinking about how she must have been here earlier but left to go looking for us. It had to be her. She has to be nearby. I wipe the sweat off my forehead and look up to see Daryl crouching by something.

"What is it?" I ask getting off the steps and walking up to him. "Some tracks?"

"No." He says just as I reach him. In front of him were two flowers. Long stemmed with white petals and a yellow center.

"Flowers?"

"Cherokee roses." He says like it was common knowledge.

"Never heard of them. They're pretty though." I say crouching down beside him to get a better look at them. "What's this got to do with Sophia?"

"It's a sign." I give him a confused look. "Didn't you learn about the Indians in school?"

"Yeah but I only remember a little of it. Never heard anything about flowers though."

"What about the trail of tears?"

"Yeah I heard of that. In the 1800's the Americans forced a lot of the tribes to move out west right?"

"Yeah. The story is that when American soldiers were moving Indians off their land on the trail of tears the Cherokee mothers were grieving and crying so much 'cause they were losing their little ones along the way. Exposure, disease, starvation. A lot of them just disappeared… So the elders, they said a prayer; asked for a sign to uplift the mothers' spirits, give them strength and hope. The next day this rose started to grow right where the mothers' tears fell."

"Whoa…" that was a deep story. I'm amazed Daryl knew it. "So you think it's for Sophia?"

"Don't think it's for my brother." Or my sister…

I feel my eyes water. Thinking about all the pain those Cherokee mothers went through. The same pain that Carol is going through now. I can't imagine what it's like to lose your own child. Losing my sister and Sophia feels bad enough to me. If that pain is twice as worse than what I'm feeling I'm surprised Carol is still standing.

"Here." I look down to see a flower being held out to me. "Think this one's for you."

"Huh? Why? I'm not a mom."

"No. But you've been grieving for your sister since I met you. And I saw the way you were around that little girl. The way you treated her, loved her like she was blood, and comforted her when her asshole of a dad died. These flowers are a sign. Telling you and Carol not to worry." I take the flower from him gently, trying not to damage it. It truly was beautiful.

"Thanks. You going to give that one to Carol? I think it'll mean a lot to her." He nods his head and picks it from the ground.

Daryl just keeps on surprising me. Every time I think I got him figured out he shows this different side to him and I'm curious to know who he really is. I think he's starting to let people in. Something he never wanted to do when Merle was around. As harsh as it is to say I think not having Merle around was good for Daryl. He can finally be himself and not have anyone dragging him down.

"How do you do it?" I blurt out before I can stop myself.

"Do what?" he asks.

"Keep getting stronger. No matter how much crap is thrown at you somehow you always get through it better than ever."

"You don't think you've gotten stronger?"

"I used too. But not now." I get up to leave but he grabs me by the arm. He stands up and looks me in the eyes fiercely.

"You're wrong. When I first met you I thought you were just another girl who thought she was tougher than she was. It wasn't until you were fighting off those walkers that I saw how determined you were to live. You may not be as confident as you were then, but you are stronger."

He let's go of my arm and starts to head back to the farm. I just follow him, speechless.


	26. Chapter 26

**Sorry this one's short. With the holidays and an annual holiday party I've been a little busy.**

**Also. Sorry if there's more spelling or grammar mistakes than usual. The new layout in Doc Manager for the site doesn't have a spell/grammar check anymore which is a shame because I found it more helpful than the one on Microsoft.**

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Sophia?

"Sophia! Where are you?"

I split up from Daryl to look for Sophia on my own. We agreed we'd cover more ground if he went west while I went east and we would meet up at the creek when the sun starts to set. Sadly I'm having no luck. The woods have now turned into a never ending maze, I keep going but never find a way out or any sign of anyone. All the trees look the same, there's no landmarks or any signs to indicate I'm not going around in circles. I'm probably lost. No, I'm definitely lost.

I sit down on a fallen tree, catching my breath and trying to clear my head. How did I get here? It's like my memory of the last couple hours have been wiped away. All I know is that I've just been endlessly walking, looking for her. Time must have gotten away from me because the sky is now a light blue mixed with orange and gray tones. I need to go back and find Daryl. The Cherokee rose that is still in my hand starts to wilt. I gently rub the stalk, almost as if I expect it to magically bring Sophia back to me if I wish hard enough. If it was truly a sign that she was okay than Sophia should be around here, right?

"Ughhhhhh."

I turn to the noise and see a walker come towards me. Disgruntled I put the rose down on the stump and get up to take care of the walker. I pick up my hatchet and swing it at it's head, severing it from its body. Once the head stops rolling I swing my hatchet again to give it the final hit between the eyes. It splits open and the moaning stops. Quickly I turn back to get to get my flower and go to meet Daryl. I wasted too much time here.

"Help!"

My heart starts to race as I hear the cry. It wasn't Daryl. He would never cry out for help. Instead it sounded more high pitch, younger and desperate. I turn towards the source and start running as fast as I could. Weaving through the trees and ducking under branches. I didn't even wince as some of them hit me in the face. I needed to find who cried for help. It had to be her.

"Sophia!" I cry out hoping to hear her voice again.

"Help me!"

The shout came from the right. I pivot and veer off right sliding down a hill. Gaining to much speed however caused me to fall forward, face planting in the dirt. Pushing myself up I see that I'm in front of a rapidly flowing river. On the other side are two walkers and someone with their back turned to me.

"Sophia!" I scream hoarsely.

She turns around and looks at me. Her light blue eyes look red and she has cuts and bruises on her face, arms and legs. Her clothes are torn and covered in mud. I don't think I've ever felt happier and more horrified in my entire life.

"Natalie help!" She screams while looking at me then back at the walkers.

"Cross the river! I'll meet you half way!"

She looks hesitantly at the water as I get up and make my way towards her. The rapids threaten to push me down but I keep going. I sink deeper and deeper into the water as I trudge towards her, my feet get heavier with each step I take. Just when she steps in the water though something wraps around my leg and I get stuck. I gasp and try to free it but it won't come lose. I reach down to grab what was stuck on me and pull up a snarling walker. Its skin is slimy and falling off the bone. The teeth that it still had left are a blackish yellow. I plunge my hatchet into its head while screaming and push it off me.

"Ahhhhh!"

I turn back to Sophia but something grabs my left side, then my right, then the next thing I knew hands were all over me trying to pull me down. I'm stuck as I see her fall and try to crawl away from the two walkers in front of her.

"No! Daryl help!" I cry out as I'm pulled backwards, the last thing I see is a walker falling on top of her before I'm submerged in water. He must be around, he must have heard our screams. I can't be her last hope, I'm can't even save myself.

I flail around but I'm no longer being held down hands. Opening my eyes I find myself on my sleeping bag, lying on my side and face to face with my copy of The Shining bookmarked with the Cherokee rose. My head is pounding, my heart is racing, I'm sweating bullets and I can't catch my breath no matter how many breaths I take. I sit up but instantly regret it as my stomach starts to do summersaults and I feel a burning sensation at the back of my throat. Letting out a groan I pull my legs to my chest and rest my head on them to wait for the nausea and the shaking to stop.

…That… that nightmare… it felt so real. I could almost feel the slimy and rotting hands grabbing at me. Pulling me down into the water, I thought my lungs were going to burst from holding my breath for too long. I thought that I had actually found Sophia… but I didn't. I didn't find anything after searching that house. Instead me and Daryl came back to the farm, he checked in on Carol and I went to ask Glenn what I missed out on. Something seemed to have happened with him and Maggie because she was avoiding him and when I asked what it was about he always changed the subject. Instead he told me about the failed attempt to get a really fat and bloated walker out of the well with all the excruciating details, which is probably what inspired my brain to put walkers in the damn river of my dream. Ugh, don't think about it!

I lift my head up and look around for my bag. Once I find it I crawl towards it and start digging around to find what I'm looking for. After pulling out some clothes and my camera I finally found the little plastic pill bottle. It feels light. I start to shake it and feel relieved when I hear a rattling sound but it goes away when I only pour out three tablets.

"Fuck." I mutter to myself before taking one and lying back down.

I guess I should have taken Glenn's concern the other day more seriously. That way I would have looked and realized that I was running out of medication before he and Maggie went to the drugstore. But it was too late now. Now I just need to ration my last pills long enough until the next run. Hopefully it's soon, because if I don't get more than these nightmares are going to be the least of my problems.

* * *

**Happy holidays everyone! Hope everyone is having a good one. So yeah sorry it's short but hey it's better than nothing and it's going to set up some stuff for Natalie. I hope no one thinks this is sudden because I've been trying to set up this plot for a while (little bits and pieces in some chapters). But just so no one gets confused Natalie is NOT a drug addict, its just a powerful prescription (doctor approved) she would take that has some bad side effects if you try to quit cold turkey. **

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**Review Responses**

**SenSen-Chan: Aw i'm glad you thought it was cute! I thought that it's been a little intense lately and a little fluff towards the end would be nice. **

**LadyCaysie: Always glad to cheer someone up from a F*cked up Day!**

**Gorgram: Yeah I've been meaning to go back and fix up some grammar on older chapters. I'd like to say most of the time my grammar is decent but sadly I'm no expert (I may consider a beta reader in the future). Don't worry about the nit-picking because I appreciate honestly and want to fix any mistakes. **


	27. Chupracabra (Part 1)

**A/N: So a quick heads up this one and the next chapter will go back and forth between POV's so I hope it doesn't get too confusing. I'll explain more about why this chapter is split into two at the end of the story. Oh I do mention a specific song in this one so if you're curious about what it sounds like look up the name of it and the artist on youtube or however you listen music if you don't know it. **

**P.S: I'm closing the poll for story ideas. Only three people voted and it ended in a tie so I'm just not going to start a new story. I actually think it's for the best at the moment because I can focus on this story and maybe I'll just do one-shots or something if I really feel like it.**

**Review Responses**

**SenSen-Chan: yeah that one was a little short because of the holidays but I'm glad you still liked it :) Now that the holidays are over the chapters should be longer.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead or the song One by Metallica.**

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Chuparacabra Part 1

I couldn't fall back to sleep after that. I was afraid that if I closed my eyes that my nightmare would pick up where it left off. That it was like unpausing a movie during the climatic ending, only this time I didn't want to know how it would end. So I grabbed my MP3 player and sat down on the swinging chair by the RV to watch the sun come up. I guess I woke up pretty early because by the time the sun came up my battery was dead. Pretty soon almost everyone was up and eating breakfast or getting started on some chores.

"Why does it sound weird?" I turn my head towards the RV to see Glenn trying to play a guitar Dale found on the highway. "Natalie does this sound like anything on your playlist?" he strums a few cords and they sound off key.

"Is this your first time with a guitar?" I ask him.

"Yeah. Never played one before but I know it's not supposed to sound like this."

"Bring it over here." He comes over and hands me the guitar. I start to twist the knobs at the top and strum some of the cords.

"You know how to play? Why didn't you say anything when we found it?"

"I haven't played one in years so I just assumed I forgot. So don't expect a grand performance out of me anytime soon." I finished tightening all the cords until I felt satisfied that it sounded right.

"So does it sound better?"

"Only one way to find out for sure."

I strum each sting again and it sounded decent enough to me but Glenn still seemed unsure. I let out a sigh and tried to remember which songs I used to play. I didn't want to play smoke on water because that seems like one of the most overplayed songs in history. So instead I picked the first real song I learned how to play. The guitar solo at the beginning of the song One by Metallica. Sure enough I was slow and my fingers were fumbling slightly against the cords but it was better than I thought it would be. I saw some glances from the others and Glenn was smiling and looking impressed. As I was plucking the last cord the sound cut off as my hand started to shake. I felt panic set in as Glenn looked at me confused about why I stopped so abruptly.

"You okay?" He asked me. My hand stopped shaking and I nodded my head as I gave him the guitar back.

"Still rusty I guess."

"Better than anything I could have done. Could you teach me?" I laugh at that.

"Trust me Glenn I'm the worst teacher you could ask for. I've got no patience."

"Truer words have never been spoken." A familiar southern accent said. I look up to see Daryl walk past us and towards the car Rick, Shane, T-Dog and Andrea were around. Glenn gets up from the swing.

"I'm going to go practice on the porch. Wanna come?"

"I'll meet you up there." I say still looking at the others. He walks away as I eavesdrop on their conversation.

"All right, everyone's getting new search grids today." Rick said while laying out a map on the hood of the car. "If she made it as far as the farmhouse Daryl and Natalie found, she might have gone further east than we've been so far."

"I'd like to help." Jimmy chimed in. "I know the area pretty well and stuff."

"Hershel's okay with this?" Rick asked.

"Yeah yeah. He said I should ask you."

"All right then. Thanks."

"Nothing about what they found screams Sophia to me." Shane said sounding like a jackass and making me clench my fists. "Anyone could have been holed up in that farmhouse."

"Anybody includes her, right?" Andrea spoke up.

"Whoever slept in that cupboard was no bigger than yay-high." Daryl said holding his hand out to show it was around Sophia's side.

"It's a good lead." Andrea agreed.

"Maybe we'll pick up her trail again." Rick said.

"No maybe about it. I'm gonna borrow a horse, head up to this ridge right here, take a bird's-eye view of the whole grid .If she's up there, I'll spot her."

"Good idea."

"Maybe you'll see your chupacabra up there too." I can't help but chuckle when T-Dog said that remembering that night.

"Chupacabra?" Rick asks confused.

"You never heard this?" Dale asked. "Our first night in camp, Daryl tells us that the whole thing reminds him of a time when he went squirrel hunting and he saw a chupacabra." Jimmy chuckles which earns a glare from Daryl.

"What are you braying at, jackass?" he asked.

"You believe in a blood-sucking dog?"

"Do you believe dead people walking around?" Huh. He actually had a point there. At this point I guess anything is possible. Jimmy reaches for one of the guns laid out on the hood but is stopped by Rick.

"Hey hey. Ever fire one before?"

"Well, if I'm going out, I want one." Oh what a great idea! Why don't we just give out guns to everyone who wants one and see who can cause the most causalities in our group, god why do guns make people stupid?

"Yeah, and people in hell want slurpees." Daryl says and walks off towards the stables, right past me without saying a word. Figures, he's not the type of guy to say goodbye.

I let out a sigh and get up to help Carol and Lori with the laundry. As I'm doing it though I can't help but look towards the stable and watch Daryl ride off to look for Sophia.

* * *

After finishing with the laundry I walked towards the house to meet up with Glenn. When Lori found out I was going she asked that if I ran into Maggie or Patricia could I ask them if we could use the kitchen to cook for everyone. As I walk I can't help but feel weirded out with how calm it is here. It's like this little farm is completely isolated from the rest of the world. Actually it's kind of boring. Not that I should complain but I just got used to always moving or getting into some sort of trouble.

"It wasn't that bad, was it?" I hear Glenn talk from the porch. He was talking to Maggie, neither of them had noticed me so I backed up to try to give them space.

"Look, I don't even know if I like you."

"But you're thinking about it. You should."

I to cover my mouth to stop myself from laughing. Oh god was this really his way of trying to flirt? Leaning against the side of the house and talking like one those guys from cheesy chick flicks. Maggie didn't seem to be impressed because she started to walk away from him. I see how disappointed he looks and can't help but feel bad for him.

"Hey Maggie. I need to ask you something." I call out to her and head towards her. She stops for a minute and faces me.

"Sure. Can you walk and talk? I gotta get to the stables."

"Yeah." I start walking with her towards the stables. "So Carol and Lori were wondering if they could use the kitchen to cook dinner for everyone. You know, thank you for everything you and your family have done for us."

"I can run it by Patricia since she uses the kitchen the most but I don't see why not. You gonna cook too?"

"Um I'm not sure that's a good idea. I'm only a master chef when it comes to microwave food. Anything else would end up with me airing out the kitchen so I wouldn't set off the smoke alarms." She laughs at that.

"You're funny. I can see why you and Glenn are friends."

"Speaking of Glenn you two seem to have hit it off." She looks shocked when I say that and her face gets serious.

"What's he told you?"

"Not much actually. Kind of surprising since he's usually so honest. All I know is that once you guys got back from the pharmacy things seem a little weird. Anytime I try to ask him about it he gets this look on his face and changes the subject."

"Huh. So what are your theories?"

"Knowing him he probably said something without thinking it through. A part of me considered that you two hooked up but then-"I saw her face turn red and she wouldn't look me in the eyes. "Holy shit!"

"Don't tell anyone! Do you understand me?"

"Yeah. Of course it's none of my business but you don't have to act so embarrassed. Your both adults and can do whatever you want."

"Thanks. But I don't know what to do now. It… it was kind of weird." She opens the door to the stables and we walk in. She grabs some hay and follow her lead and help her feed the horses.

"Well it could have been the circumstances. Being in an abandon drugstore with the threat of walkers probably lowers the mood and honestly with everything that's happened I don't think anyone can last more than about five minutes." She stops and bends over laughing.

"Five? I think that's being generous." I laugh at that. God I hate to admit it but feels good to be able to talk like this with Maggie.

"But anyway. Before you decide what to do I just want you to know that Glenn is a great guy. He's one of the kindest people I've ever met. Sometimes too kind because he doesn't say no when you ask him to do something."

"I noticed that when there was that well walker yesterday. Your group could have gotten him killed!"

"Trust me I know and I don't like it either. But he won't listen to me because he really believes that he's helping others."

"If he's such a nice guy then why aren't you dating him? You two seem close enough."

"Because I'm a glutton for punishment. I seem to always attract the troubled and misunderstood ones no matter how hard I try to avoid them."

"Like that guy you rode on the bike with?" She smirks at me.

"Who Daryl? No it's nothing like that."

"Then what is- wait where's Nelly?" she asks when we reach an empty stall.

"Looks like someone took her without asking?" I look over towards the doors to see Hershel walking towards us. "Was it one of your people Miss?" he asks while looking at me. Really? What the hell Dixon!

"I'm sorry. A certain person in our group is… well he doesn't have the best social etiquette."

"Well if he's going to stay here then I need to make some things clear. When can I talk to him?"

"He's gone now but I'd recommend you talk to Rick instead. He's our leader of the group and he's the most reasonable-I drop the bale of hay I was carrying because my arm starts to shake again. I quickly grab it to stop it from shaking.

"Natalie are you okay?" Maggie asks looking concerned.

"I'm fine. Just got a sore wrist."

"I'll take a look at it for you. Maggie why don't you go help Patricia with the garden." Maggie leaves as Hershel grabs my wrists and starts examining it. I stand there awkwardly not sure what to say or if I should say anything at all.

"There seems to be nothing physically wrong with it." He says and lets it go.

"Well thank you for checking it. I probably just over did it the past few days." I go to leave when he calls out.

"I'm afraid that it's only going to get worse." I stop dead in my tracks.

"What's going to get worse?" I try to act dumb.

"No need to hide it. I know an addict when I see one."

"I'm not an addict! Why would you say that?"

"I know what a person going through withdraw looks like. I went through it myself so I can't judge you." I calm down when he says that.

"Sorry. Sometimes I get overly defensive. But I am not an addict, I take a medication that a doctor prescribed me. I'm running out and I'm trying to save them until the next pharmacy run."

"Have you thought about what will happen when you run out and can't find more?"

I let out a sigh and shake my head. I haven't given it much thought but he had a point. How long can I keep this up? What happens when I can't find more? Sure being sick while my system gets cleaned out isn't good but it's the thought of what comes after that that scares me. I've been taking them for so long that I don't know what I'll be like without them. What if I just completely unravel and become a burden on everyone else?

"I haven't thought very far but I'm not delusional. I know I'll have to go off them eventually, I just… how long do withdraws usually last?"

"Mine lasted for a little over a week but a lot of people suffer from flu like symptoms for two weeks."

"Two weeks?" That's too long. No one can afford to be sick for that long anymore. "Damn, I should have asked Glenn when I had the chance."

"Well I may need someone to make another run. At the rate antibiotics are going I might need to ask Maggie to go tomorrow."

"Thank you doc."

"Just Hershel is fine. I'm actually a veterinarian."

"So? That doesn't make you any less of a doctor. It actually kind of makes you more badass because you help those that can't tell you what's wrong." A horse neighs loudly and scares me. "Sorry. I've been out there so long it's hard to believe that this place is safe." He looks uncomfortable as I say this.

"Well I have other chores to do. Take care." He goes to leave and I can't help but be confused about what I said to make him uncomfortable.

* * *

_Meanwhile in the forest…_

The deafening silence of the woods was suddenly interrupted by the sound of an arrow being fired. The arrow soared through the air until it hit its target, a squirrel that was now skewered to a tree. Daryl rode his horse up to the tree and plucked the arrow out of the tree, collecting his kill and pocketing it. He has been out looking for Sophia for a while but all has been quiet. He was making his way towards the peak, following the creek and keeping a lookout for any signs of the girl. Out of the corner of his eyes thought he saw something in the water.

"Whoa" he stopped his horse to get a better look. Something was stuck to a fallen tree in the water.

He got off the horse and started walking down the hill, taking his crossbow off his back just in case. Slowly he makes it down the hill and onto walks into the shallow water of the creek. The sound of his boots splashing in the water cease when he stops in front of the object that caught his eye. It was a doll. Bending over he picked it up and held it in his hand. It was the same doll that Sophia had on her when she went missing.

"Sophia!" he called out looking around for her. There were no other signs of her but the doll gave him hope that she was around. It was the first real indication that she made it this far out here.

After looking around long enough to know for sure she wasn't there he attached the doll to his belt and made his back up the hill. He got on the horse and urged it forward, maybe if he continued along the creek he would find her. As he was making his way along the trail though some crows got startled and flew past him. They were too close though and they startled his horse.

"Whoa. Easy easy." Once the horse was calm he urged her forward. He was so busy looking for Sophia that he failed to notice the snake hiding in the leaves until it was too late.

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!"

He was thrown from his horse with such force that he couldn't stop himself as his body rolled down the hill. He kept hitting his head along the way as he slide down the grass, onto the wet rocks and finally landed in the water. He let out a grunt as pain radiated throughout his body. He was sore from all the bumps he hit on his way down, his head was throbbing and he felt a stinging sensation on his right temple where he had a cut that was bleeding, and he had a sharp searing pain in his side where an arrow had accidently been shot from his crossbow and pierced through the skin.

"Son of a bitch."

He laid there for a while. Waiting for the pain to lessen enough to do something. The water around him was turning red with his blood and it was seeping into his clothes. Once the pain was somewhat bearable he rolled over so that he was on his hands and knees and started crawling towards land. He kept grunting from the pain in his side as he moved. The arrow was slowing him down and caused him so much pain that he had to hold it in place as crawled with one hand.

Once he reached land he realized he had to stop the arrow from moving. Taking his knife out he cut the sleeves off his shirt and tied them around his torso tightly. Looking up he saw that he had a long way to climb to climb up, it wasn't going to be easy. Still panting he pushed himself up and got a long branch to help him climb. He heard the sound of a branch break and turned around to stare across the river. Something was moving in the bushes but he lost his crossbow in the water. He made his back to the water and used the stick to look for his crossbow. It took about two minutes of poking around until he found it and slung it on his back before going to climb up the hill.

He slowly made his way up the hill, using the branch for leverage and grabbing whatever trees he could to pull himself up. He was starting to feel exhausted. He was breathing heavily and his lungs felt like they were about to burst. Now was not the time though to take a break; if he didn't make it back to the farm he could bleed out or get a serious infection. He stuck the branch into the dirt only for it to break off and it slipped out of his hand. He watched it fall before looking up to see how far he was from the top. It was steep but if he could swing himself to the next tree than he could have a decent shot of making it to the top.

"Oh, come on. You've done half. Stop being such a pussy." He said to himself.

With a grunt he swung himself to the next tree but the dirt caved under him. He tried to catch himself on the trees behind him but could only hold on for a short time before exhaustion took over and he fell back down the hill. Once he hit the ground he rolled over on his back and passed out.

* * *

_Back at the Farm..._

"Hey Glenn." I say to him as I sit down on the ground next to him. He had a troubled look on his face as he was deep in thought. He didn't even seem to be reading the book in his hand.

"Hey." He says not looking at me.

Huh, maybe he's thinking about Maggie. I know she said not to tell anyone but does that apply to Glenn who already knows what happened? I was never good at these types of things, I didn't like having to deal with someone else's secrets. It always causes more drama than you want.

"Whatever's on your mind you can talk to me about it. I kind of figured it out."

"You did?" he looks horrified when I said this.

"Yeah. No offense Glenn but it's easy to tell when you're keeping a secret."

"Oh come on! Look you can't tell anyone. I promised Lori-"

"Lori? What are you talking about?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about you and Maggie. What's going on with Lori?"

He looks over my shoulder and I turn around to see Lori walking by us with a bucket. He gets up to follow her, sighs and motions for me to follow him too. I let out a grunt and get up to follow them. God, who would have thought that today would turn into a damn soap opera?

"Mind your own business Glenn." She says to him still walking.

"You're pregnant." He says.

"Wait what?" I blurt out and Lori turns around eyes wide.

"You told her?" She says angrily and looks around to see if anyone else was around.

"I had to. She could tell something was wrong."

"Don't blame Glenn. There was a misunderstanding."

"Look." She says in a hushed tone. Her eyes look desperate. "You can't tell anybody, okay? Both of you."

"I won't. It's none of my business." I say. I look up and see Rick and Shane walking back towards camp. Lori looks over at them and back at us, pleading not to tell them.

"You haven't told them yet?" Glenn asked in disbelief. Oh god what are we getting into?

She avoids answering and empties the bucket of water. Glenn leaves and I'm about to follow him but can't without saying something.

"Look, I know we don't agree on a lot of things so I doubt this will be different." I whisper to her. "I mean it when I say it's none of my business but in my opinion I think the sooner you tell Rick the better."

"Natalie-"

"Let me finish. He's a good man and he loves you and Carl with all of his heart. Don't let something like this get in between the two of you, secrets do more harm than good."

I walk away and go back to Glenn. I may have overstepped my boundaries there but I knew that it was going to bug me if I didn't say anything. I may not like Lori most of the time I certainly don't like a lot of the decisions she's made in the past; but that doesn't mean I shouldn't try to talk some sense into her. Rick, Carl or the baby she's carrying shouldn't have to suffer because of her choices.

"So, that was… awkward." I say to Glenn once I reach him.

"How could she not have told him?" he asked. "Doesn't Rick have the right to know? Ugh, I don't know how long I can keep this a secret."

"Hey, calm down. This is Lori's problem. Why she hasn't told Rick… who knows?" Well I have a feeling why, but I can't tell Glenn that it could be Shane's. He's has enough secrets burdening him. "Things aren't always that simple for some people. Something that you think is obvious and should be done can be really hard or unthinkable to do for someone else. But like it or not this is Lori's decision."

"Yeah… guess you're right." He takes a deep breath and calms down. "So, you know about me and Maggie?"

"Yeah. Sorry but I couldn't help but see that you were looking down and I wanted to help. So I talked with her while she worked in the stables."

"You did? Oh god this is so embarrassing! What if she thinks I sent you to find out what she thought? She'll hate me!"

"Calm down lover boy, it wasn't like that. We just had a girl talk and I told her you are a really good guy."

"Did it seem like she was interested at all?"

"Well she asked about our relationship so that could indicate jealousy. She also doesn't like the idea of the group using you for dangerous situations so she cares about your well-being."

"Really? So there is something." He gets a sly look on his face and I snort trying not to laugh. "Hey. Don't laugh this is serious."

"How serious?" I ask once I stop laughing. "What do you want out of this Glenn?"

"Ugh… well it's like you said, we can't form any ties but there's nothing wrong with a little action." I can tell he doesn't really mean it though.

"Look Glenn, I know it's none of my business but I just don't want to see you get hurt. Maybe it'd be good if you two got to know each other and figure out what you want before you do anything else."

"You're right." He says deep in thought. "It is none of your business." He walks away from me.

"Glenn! Don't be like that." I say trying to go after him.

"Be like what? You, Maggie, Lori, Andrea, you're all confusing."

"What are you talking about?"

"For the past few days you've been like a roller coaster. First you're shutting me out and avoiding everyone, now you're getting all involved in my business. What's up with that?

"I… I'm sorry. Since Sophia went missing things have been crazy and I'm trying to deal with it."

"I know it's been stressful because of what happened to Sophia but you can talk to me or any one of us about how you're feeling." I feel bad now. Glenn has been nothing but a good friend to me, he doesn't deserve this. "Just talk to someone. If not me than how about Dale or even Daryl since you two are pretty close."

"What?" I try to ask him what he meant by that but he walked away from me.

I put my hands in my face and let out a groan. God, my day to rest feels like I've been doing everything but resting! Why does everything have to be so dramatic? And why does Glenn have to be right? Ugh, it's upsetting to think that I've been pushing almost everyone away when this is probably the time I need them the most. It seems like the only person who I haven't tried to push away is Daryl and I can't even begin to explain why. He just makes everything feel better. Our banters, his unyielding will to find Sophia, the Cherokee rose, they're little things but they somehow managed to make me feel better. But why is it that I allow him to get close to me? Why is it out of all people I feel safe with him?

I pull my face out of my hands and take a deep breath. I'll figure that stuff out later, there's enough shit to deal with anyway.

* * *

**Happy 2015! So I hope you all enjoyed it! This was originally going to be longer but then I thought it might be too much to have Natalie's withdraw problems, her talks with Hershel, Maggie and Glenn, finding out about Lori's pregnancy, Daryl's accident (wow, I can't believe I put all that in one chapter!), Daryl's hallucination, Daryl getting shot and the aftermath of that all in one chapter. So I split it into two hoping that it'll be easier to process. **

**Thank you for reading and feel free to leave review about what you thought of it. Also to other writers is anyone else having problems with writing on the site? Any time I try to add a horizontal line it goes away after I save and I have to redo it a lot before it stays. (If i'm lucky)**


	28. Chupracabra (Part 2)

**So i'm doing this late but here we go, this one has a lot of references to previous chapters. Sorry if the proof reading is bad.**

**Review Responses:**

**LadyCaysie: Glad you liked the shorter chapters, that makes me feel less guilty :) Happy New Year!**

** .Reader: Thank you for replying. Glad to see I'm not the only one having horizontal line problems (Sadly I still am.)**

**Guest: Don't worry about not voting, it all turned out fine. Thank you for the complement and I hope you continue to like it :)**

* * *

_Back in the Woods…_

Daryl laid there drifting in and out of consciousness. It seemed like every time he tried to get up he kept passing out. His body was too tired and weak from the combination of losing blood and all the falls he took. It wanted to give up on him and he felt like he could let it; but his mind had other ideas. He opened his eyes only to be blinded by the sunlight. His vision was cloudy at first but once it cleared saw that someone was standing over him, someone that only he would be happy to see at a time like this.

"Why don't you pull that arrow out, dummy? You could bind your wound better."

"Merle." Daryl said feeling better at the sight of his brother.

"What's going on here? You taking a siesta or something?"

"A shitty day, bro."

"Like me to get your pillow? Maybe rub your feet?" Merle taunted.

"Screw you."

"Huh-uh. You're the one screwed from the looks of it. All them years I spent trying to make a man of you, this is what I get? Look at you. Lying in the dirt like a used rubber. You're gonna die out here, brother. And for what?"

"A girl." As Daryl said this flashes of memories flooded through his head. The last time he saw Sophia, the herd of walkers, Carol breaking down in tears, Natalie's look of anger and heartbreak. "They lost a little girl."

"So you got a thing for little girls now?"

"Shut up."

"'Cause I noticed you ain't out looking for old Merle no more."

"Tried like hell to find you, bro."

"Like hell you did. You split, man. Lit out first chance you got." This angered Daryl. He was willing to risk everything for Merle.

"You lit out. All you had to do was wait. We went back for you. Rick, Falco and I, we did right by you."

"This the same Rick that cuffed me to the rooftop in the first place? Forced me to cut off my own hand?" As Merle said this he looked down and was confused when he saw his brother had both of his hands.

"This him we're talking about here? And Falco, the one who was going to rat us out unless went crawling back to her with your tail between your legs? You her bitch now or Rick's?

"I ain't nobody's bitch."

"You're a joke is what you are, playing errand boy to a bunch of pansy-asses, niggers and democrats. You're nothing but a freak to them. Redneck trash. That's all you are. They're laughing at you behind your back. You know that, don't you? I got a little news for you, son. One day they gonna scrape you off their heels like you was dog shit."

Daryl started to turn his head to the side drifting off. Merle's words were starting to sink in. He wasn't wrong, most people viewed him as redneck trash so why should they think any differently? Something caught his eye though as he was drifting, a feather. It was long tawny feather, dark brown spots covering light brown. He's seen that pattern before, the tattoo on Natalie's back. He could picture it in his mind, the way it looked so realistic against her bare skin. He saw her hair fall off her shoulder sweep over the tattoo as she turned around and looked at him with a smile on her face.

"Falco?" he muttered.

_"You know… maybe you're not such an ass. I kind of like this side of Daryl Dixon." _She spoke the words didn't match her the shapes her lips were making. Then he remembered he'd heard these words before some time ago. "_A side that's friendlier, amusing to talk to, someone I can laugh with, joke with, tease without hurting your feelings, you're still rude and an ass but I don't mind. You… just kind of help make this whole situation not suck as much as it does."_

"_No I don't". _He thought to himself. "_I'm just trash you're gonna scrape off your boot one day_." She shook her head though as though she heard him.

"_You can't get rid of me that easily Daryl." _And the truth was Daryl didn't want to. Those words stirred something in Daryl, something that scared him.

"Hey." Merle slaps his chest and Daryl snaps out of it. Natalie was gone and Merle was in her place.

"They ain't your kin, your blood. Hell, you had any damn nuts in that sack of yours, you'd got back there and shoot your pal Rick in the face for me. Now you listen to me." Merle grabbed his face with his dirty, grubby hands. "Ain't nobody ever gonna care about you except me, little brother. Not Rick, not Falco, nobody ever will. Come on, get up on your feet before I have to kick your teeth in." He gently slaps his face and gets up. He lands a kick on Daryl's side but he doesn't move.

"Let's go."

Merle starts tugging at his boot again. Although instead of tugging, the sensation in his leg felt like a dog or something was trying to bite his leg off. He looked down to see that instead of his brother a walker was trying to bite his foot off. It stopped biting his foot and looked right in his face, letting out a loud snarl. Snapping out of it Daryl backed away and kicked it away. He looked to his right and saw his crossbow laying in the mud a couple feet away from him. He reached for it only to have the walker jump on him. They rolled around in the dirt, fighting, punching, and kicking the walker. A second walker lurched out of the woods and towards the fight. Managing to get away from the walker, Daryl grabbed a long thick branch and attacked the walker, smashing its face in until it oozed blood before impaling it in the eye. The other walker was getting close, having no more ammo Daryl was forced to pull the arrow out of his side and load it into his crossbow. He shot it just as he falls backward killing the walker instantly.

After laying in the dirt for a while to catch his breath Daryl finally got up to make his back up the hill. He takes his button up shirt off and ties it around his wound. It felt a lot better now that the arrow was gone.

"Son of a bitch was right."

Before he tried the to climb the cliff he gutted and ate the squirrel he caught for lunch, found Sophia's doll that he lost during the fall, and cut off the ears of the walkers to make a necklace out of it. Once he was done he started to make his way up the hill, unfortunately for Daryl he wasn't having better luck than the last time he tried. He was still running out of breath and the vines he was grabbing were as fragile as and broke when he grabbed on to them. A noise startled him but it turned out to be birds flying by.

"Please, don't feed the birds." Daryl looked up to see Merle mocking him. He was also almost to the top.

"What's the matter, Darylina? That all you got in you? Throw away that purse and climb."

"I liked it better when you was missing." Daryl said panting and trying to pull himself up.

"Come on, don't be like that. Falco's a pretty lil distraction but she can't replace ol' Merle."

"What are you talking about?"

"I know you been with her since I've been gone, I know you were thinking of her a while ago. But thing is lil' bro she's been using you all along."

"Leave her outta this!"

"Now now, don't get too pissy Darylina. Just think about it. If everything was all sunshine, rosy and normal would she be hanging around with you? 'Course not, she'd be looking for some prick who works from nine to five and owns his place. She's only hanging around trash like you to save her own skin."

"She's stronger than she looks!" Daryl blurted out. "She can handle herself."

"Cause you taught her how! You defend her because she acts like your friend and makes you feel like her knight in shining armor but really you're just another step for her to climb on her way to the top. She's not on your side I am."

"Yeah? Since when?"

"Hell, since the day you were born, baby brother. Somebody had to look after your worthless ass."

"You never took care of me. You talk a big game but you was never there. Hell, you ain't here now. Guess some things never change."

"Well, I'll tell you what. I'm as real as your chupacabra." Merle said mockingly angering Daryl.

"I know what I saw."

"And I'm sure them mushrooms you ate had nothing to do with it, right?

"You'd best shut the hell up!"

"Or what? You're gonna come up here and shut my mouth for me? Well, come on and do it then, if you think you're man enough." Merle laughs and anger flows through Daryl giving him strength to move up a bit farther.

"Hey, kick off them damn high heels and climb, son." Merle continued to talk while laughing. "You know what? If I were you I'd take a pause for the cause, brother. 'Cause I just don't think you're gonna make it to the top. Come on. Come on, little brother. Grab your friend Rick's hand."

Merle held out his hand just as Daryl made it to the top. He grunted in pain, took quick short breaths and pulled himself up. He looked around and saw Merle was nowhere to be found.

"Yeah, you'd better run!" He shouted and started to make his way back to the farm.

* * *

Natalie's POV

Okay Daryl, when are you going to come back from your search? Rick, Shane, Andrea, T-Dog, and Jimmy are all back by now but none of them have seen or heard from Daryl since they got back. I thought that he'd come back not long after Andrea, T-Dog and Jimmy came back but that had to be at least two hours ago. Best case scenario he found a lead and is getting close to finding her, worst case scenario- no! This is Daryl, he'll be okay.

"Still no sign?" Rick asks approaching me.

"No." I respond squinting as the sun gets in my eyes.

"It's Daryl. What'd he say that one time? Only a Dixon can kill a Dixon."

"We can walk down memory lane all you want Sheriff-

"Deputy, I was actually a sheriff's deputy."

"No difference to me. Anyway we can walk down memory lane all you want but if he doesn't come back before dark I won't hesitate to go after him."

"And I'll go with you. Believe me, I understand not wanting to lose any more people. But I also have to protect the ones we have left."

"Shane once said something similar. That day they brought you back to the camp, he wouldn't let us go to Atlanta to rescue everyone from the department store. I was so mad at him for being so cold. For not giving everyone else the right to rescue their loved ones. I still haven't forgiven him for that and it's why I prefer you being our leader." His eyes are conflicted as I say this.

"Leaders have to make tough calls sometimes. Sometimes you have to do what you think is best for everyone even if they'll hate you for it. I need you to understand that."

"What are you-"

"Walker. Walker!" Andrea yells from the top of the RV. Rick and I look out across the field and I spot it. I can't see it to well because of the sun and the distance but something is slowly making its way towards the farm.

"Just the one?" Rick asks Andrea. She looks through the binoculars to double check and nods her head.

"I bet I can nail it from here." She says and picks up the riffle.

"No no, Andrea. Put the gun down." Rick tells her. I look and see the guys grab weapons. Glenn had an axe, T-Dog had a baseball bat and Shane had a pickaxe.

"You'd best let us handle this." He said.

"Shane, hold up. Hershel wants to deal with walkers." Rick tries to stop him

"What for, man? We got it covered." He walks by us with the others.

"Damn!" Rick says and runs towards to the RV.

I pull my knife out of my boot and start running, not caring if it's not as effective as an axe or a bat. I'm more focused on making sure Shane doesn't screw anything up. Rick and I soon catch up to the others and I get a better look at the walker. It's covered in dirt and blood; wearing baggy pants, a shirt tied around his midriff and what looks like an undershirt. The closer I get to it the more it looks familiar. Rick gets in front of us and pulls his gun on it, it lifts its head and my throat catches as I see its Daryl.

"No…" I whisper not wanting to believe it.

"Is that Daryl?" Shane asks.

"That's the third time you've pointed that thing at my head. You gonna pull the trigger or what?" He shouts at Rick. I let out a sigh of relief. He's not dead, thank god.

"Daryl what the fu-"

_Bang!_

I was interrupted by a gunshot and Daryl falling to the ground. I run towards him and drop to the ground before my mind can connect the two together.

"No!" I hear Rick shout as I kneel by Daryl's side. He can't die! He can't!

"No no no no." I'm pretty sure I'm sobbing as I look him over. I turn his head over and see the bullet grazed his head. "You're okay… you're okay." I pull the necklace out of his mouth only to be disgusted by the dry prune like ears on it.

"Ugh that's barbaric! What the fuck Dixon?"

"Good to see you too Falco. The real you anyway." he said.

"Real me? I think that bullet might have done more damage than I thought." I say to him, relieved that he's okay. "Just take it easy." I turn my head to look up at Rick. "He's fine. It just grazed him."

"Here, let me help him up."

I get out of the way and Rick goes to sit him up. Shane comes up to Daryl's other side and they start to drag him to the house.

"Oh my God." I look up and see Andrea and Dale running towards us. Anger flows through me as I approach Andrea.

"What the fuck were you thinking?" I shout in her face pushing her away from Daryl.

"I'm sorry, I didn't-"

"Obviously! Look what you've done!" I gesture to Rick and Shane carrying Daryl.

"Oh my God, is he dead?"

"Unconscious." Rick said. "You just grazed him."

"But look at him." Glenn said "What the hell happened? He's wearing ears."

"Let's keep that to ourselves." Rick says taking the necklace off Daryl and pocketing it in his shirt as we approach Hershel and the others.

"Guys, isn't this Sophia's?"

We turn to T-Dog and see that he's holding up a doll. I go up to him with my hand out and he hands it to me. I look at it to confirm it before looking towards the others.

"It's hers."

* * *

Hershel told them to take Daryl into the house. Rick and Shane led him inside and into a bedroom before telling everyone to give them space. Most of the others went back to what they were doing before but Dale, Andrea, Carol and I were waiting on the porch to hear about Daryl's condition and what he found out about Sophia. I gave Carol the doll and we sat on the chairs away from Andrea and Dale who were on the porch.

"She'd never let this go. What if-" Carol said.

"No what ifs. Wherever Daryl found this doll then Sophia must be somewhere nearby."

"I hope so. You were right about there being some good in him. He's worked so hard and risked his life to find her."

I look up to glare at Andrea, she was looking over here from where she was sitting on the front steps of the porch. Carol leans forward in her chair ready to try to intercept me incase I decided to jump out of my chair and attack Andrea. I honestly don't blame her at this point because I am beyond furious at Andrea. I wouldn't be surprised if I slapped her so hard that the sound would attract every walker around for miles. She gets up and comes toward with Dale following her.

"Andrea just leave it alone."

"I can't. Look Natalie, I am sorry and I feel horrible about it." She says as I get off of my chair to look her in the eye.

"Then you shouldn't have done it. You shouldn't have tried to play the hero. Not only could you have killed Daryl but what if you missed and shot one of us instead. You could have killed Rick, Glenn, Shane, T-dog or me."

"I thought it was a walker. I wanted to keep the camp safe."

"That's just it. You only thought about what you wanted! You don't think about the consequences your actions could have caused. I thought you would have learned when you shot me in Atlanta months ago!"

"What? Andrea is that true?" Dale asked looking at Andrea horrified.

"She was in trouble. I thought I could help her."

"I was trying to cross a roof on a plank of wood! There was no way you could have shot it from down on the street! But I let it go, I was stupid enough to let it go and think that telling you to get your shit together would have helped you."

"I'm trying! I am sorry I hurt you, I'm sorry I hurt Daryl, and I'm sorry I couldn't save Amy! But I am tired of losing people and tired of not being in control of my life."

"So is everyone else! But things aren't like they used to be. You don't get time to grieve, time to heal or a free pass to do whatever you want because life's been shitty to you! Every decision you make is life or death so don't expect me to go easy on you if I think you're putting somebody I love in danger!"

She doesn't respond to that, everyone is looking at me with wide eyes as I breathe heavily. I don't even remember what I said because I my emotions took over to the point where I was no longer in control of what I was ranting about. I only recall certain things like consequences, Atlanta, no time for grieving and threatening her if she hurts some I… what did I say?"

"Andrea, let Natalie cool off." Dale advises Andrea and she walks away. "Carol, Natalie, why don't we go inside. Patricia probably needs help with dinner."

Carol nods and gets off her chair. We walk inside and she heads into the kitchen. Dale holds me back and leads me into the living room.

"Are you going to lecture me about what I said to Andrea?"

"No, I am going to ask you not to do that again though. What you said may have had valid points but I'll help Andrea. I think your feelings for Daryl are clouding your judgment."

"They're not clouded! She could have killed him! We could have lost another group member and I could have lost-"I stop abruptly not wanting to finish that sentence.

"Not clouded huh? You said you wouldn't stand by if Andrea harms someone you love, do you love Daryl." My eyes widen and my stomach clenches, I said that?

"No! He's just a friend and I'd be upset if she shot anyone."

"Look it wouldn't be a bad thing if you did. What you said actually gave me hope that we can make it. Because being able to love, no matter if it's romantic or platonic, shows that you still have faith in people. That there can still be humanity when it seems lost. But with love comes the need to protect and I'm worried that with all the loss we've experienced the need to protect those we care about could very well make or break us."

"So you think I'm going to go crazy because of Daryl?"

"I'm afraid of you losing yourself over grief. You've lost your family, your friends and since Sophia went missing you've lost most of your spirit. I just don't want you to fall apart, no matter what happens you need to keep going."

"I- I'm going to see how Daryl is doing."

I walk out of the room and down to the hall to the room Daryl was being treated in. Lori was sitting on the ground waiting for them but I didn't even acknowledge her as I sat down in the chair in front of her. My mind was still racing about what Dale and I talked about. Is he right? Am I really still able to love after everything that's happened? Or am I setting myself up for heartbreak and unbearable pain? Why should allow myself to get close or love anyone when they all seem to die or be taken away from me somehow? But I did. I allowed myself to get close with some of the people here, including Daryl. The one person who most people would tell me to stay away from is the one I let myself get closest to.

The door opened and Rick and Shane came out. Lori and I stood up waiting to hear what they would say.

"How is he?" I ask

"He'll be all right." Rick says and hugs Lori.

"I hate to say it, but I'm with Hershel on this one." Shane said. "Can't keep going out there, not after this."

"You can't be serious?" I ask him angrily

"You'd quit now?" Rick asked. "Daryl just risked his life to bring back the first hard evidence we've had."

"That is one way to look at it. The way I see it, Daryl almost died today for a doll."

"And if we stop now then all Daryl went through was for nothing." I point out. "All we've been through was for nothing."

"She's right. We're not stopping now. Not for the way you see things." Rick walks away after that.

"You waiting to go in, then go." Shane says to me.

I put my hand on the door and walk in. Daryl's laying on his side on the bed. His head has a gauze wrapped around it and his shirt is off, I see the large demon tattoos on his back, a bandage on his hip and what look like faint scars on his back. He turns his head to see that it's me and pulls the sheet up over his body.

"Don't you knock?"

"Sorry, didn't know you were self-conscious." I close the door behind me. "How you doing?"

"Remember how you felt after you fell looking for Carl?"

"Getting shot feels like hitting your head on some rocks?"

"No worse. Because first the damn horse threw me down a cliff into the creek bed where I found the doll, hit my head on the way, climb my way out and then I got shot when I got back."

"Holy shit! All of that happened to you?"

"And then some."

"Wow, and to think I used to be the damsel in distress." He glares at me for that.

"Shut up."

"Fine, tell me about the doll, the ears and everything that happened and I'll shut up." I move closer to him like a kid begging for a bed time story.

He grunts but turns his head toward me and starts talking. I pull my legs up to my chest as he tells the story. I try to picture everything in my head and imagine I was there. He tells me about how everything was fine until he spotted the doll in the creek. How he got off the horse and went down to get it but when he called for Sophia he wasn't there. His face crinkles up in pain as he relives the horse throwing him off the cliff and tumbling down the rocks into the water. I rub the scar on my forehead in pain as I remember my fall. He then tells me about the first time he tried to climb up the cliff but the pain in his side from the arrow made him fall back down and pass out. When he woke up a walker was biting his boot and he had to kill it and one of its buddy. He then pulled the arrow out, cut off the ears for a trophy and then made his way back to the farm. By the time he was done I kept my promise to shut up, I was too busy processing everything to talk. I just couldn't believe that Daryl went through all that. He always seemed sort of invincible to me, that nothing could hurt him because he always fought his way out of it.

"Whoa." I mutter.

"Don't say that. Reminds me of that damn horse that almost killed me."

"And people wonder why I don't like horses. Well at least she didn't kill you. I'd miss you if you were gone."

"You can handle yourself. Don't need me."

"Who says I need you? I want you to be here." I uncurl my legs and place my feet on the ground. "Get some rest. If I don't come by later tonight I'll see you tomorrow before going to look for Sophia."

I begin to push myself off the bed when I feel something clamp on to my wrist and pull me back onto the bed. I look down to see Daryl holding on to my wrist. He opens his mouth to try to say something but shuts it just as quickly.

"Are you okay? Do you need me to get Hershel?"

"No." he says getting flustered. "I-"

_Knock Knock_

"Natalie, Daryl? It's Maggie." She says before opening the door. Daryl lets go of my wrist and rolls onto his side again. "Sorry to interrupt, dinner's ready in case your hungry."

"It's fine. I was just going to let him rest. Do you want me to bring you anything Daryl?" I ask him

"I'm fine." He says not moving from the bed.

"Could you give us a moment?" I ask. She nods and closes the door. "What were you trying to say?" I ask.

"Not important." He says.

I nod my head to hide the disappointment. I don't know why I feel that way, I'm not sure what I expected him to say but I try to brush it off. I go to open the door but realized that I didn't even thank him for bring the doll back. I was about to say thank you when a sudden impulse hit me. Fuck, I'm probably going to regret this but what the hell. I walk back to the bed and sit down.

"Don't overthink it." I say to him before giving him a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you, for everything you've done to bring the doll back. It really means a lot."

I get up and leave the room. Maggie's waiting for me outside of the room. I close the door behind me letting Daryl have some privacy and follow Maggie down the hall.

"He okay?" She asks.

"Yeah, just needs to rest."

"And are you okay?" She asks.

"Yeah, I will be."

"If you ever want to talk, ya know about _that _sort of stuff I'm here_. _It's the least I can do for you after listening to me."

"I'm not usually one to open up about that stuff but thanks. I just hope I helped with you and Glenn."

"You did, between you and me I'm gonna give it another shot."

We sit down to eat at a small table with Glenn, Beth and Jimmy. I guess you could call it the kids table since we were the youngest ones there (Carl was still in bed). It's awkwardly quiet, no one's talking to each other. All you hear is the sound of forks scraping against the plates. I don't mind because I don't know if I can fake being interested in small talk right now. My mind is just replaying everything that happened today. The nightmare, the shaky hands, the talks with Maggie, Hershel, Lori, and Glenn, Daryl getting shot, my fight with Andrea, Dale asking me about my feelings and my time alone with Daryl. It was one of the most stressful days off I've ever had but it also gave me to time to process everything I've been putting off. As much as I hate to admit Dale might be right. I'm not saying I do, hell I don't know if I ever felt it before, but I think that the reason I was so upset today is that some part of me… allowed myself to start falling in love Daryl Dixon.

* * *

**And now the feelings begin! Whew, I decided to just take the plunge and finally let some real feelings start. I've been debating about when to start the actual feelings because I didn't want to wait too long (I feel like I lost readers because of how long I've waited) but I didn't want to rush it without building something between them. So I thought that the idea of almost losing Daryl would be the best way for her to realize how much she cares for Daryl. It's still going to be on the slow side, just because Natalie realizes she's falling for Daryl it doesn't mean she's 100% in love. And more importantly does Daryl also have feelings for her yet? We know that he cares for her and wants her to be around but will he be able to love her back or is he still to damaged from his past to let someone in? Tell me your opinions and tune in to find out!**

**P.S: I've been having some writers block with this story lately. So I'm trying to find the best way to work through it and that may include skipping the episode secrets because not a lot happens in that one and moving on to Pretty Much Dead Already but it's not a sure thing. I'll just have to see how it goes and honestly I may rewrite and update this chapter because I'm not all that happy with it. But like I said this MAY happen but nothing is certain. Thank you all for reading this.**

**As always feel free to favorite, follow and review.**


	29. secrets

**A/N: Sorry this is late. I had a combination of writers block, figuring out what to do, job hunting and tweeking my resume, spending time with family, procrastination and trying to binge watch SAOII before my Crunchyroll free trial expires. But I did work on this and wrote down whatever I could think of when I could and honestly I feel extremely confident and proud of myself with what I've done with this chapter! I went from being afraid I wouldn't make it over 3,000 words to typing over 6,000! So I hope you all enjoy it!**

**Review Responses:**

**Gingerman454: Thank you so much! I'm glad you love it and want to stay till the end (I do have an end planned, I just always have problems working on the middle.)**

**LadyCaysie: I didn't doubt but thank you for telling me sweetie :)**

**SenSen-Chan: glad you liked it and as for what Daryl was going to say I think you'll be very happy with this Chapter ;) I think I owe it to you guys because of all the other times I cut him off before he could finish what was going to say.**

***_Italics mean thoughts, kind of a spoiler but I just want to avoid confusion. _**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to The Walking Dead... can't think of anything funny to say because it's almost one am and my brain is exhausted. Once I'm done this I'm going to bed and maybe have another dream where Norman Reedus and I are fighting zombies in Silent Hill. (Not even joking. The man has been stalking my dreams recently and frequently) **

**I'll spellcheck later!**

* * *

_Secrets_

She kissed him on the cheek and left, closing the door behind her. He laid there in silence, thinking about everything that happened. Every now and then he would glance at the door like he was expecting her to walk through it at any moment demanding to know what he was going to say. What was so important that he tried to stop her from leaving?

"_Do you need Hershel?" she asked him, worry filled her eyes. _

"_NO! I just want to know if you're really here. That you're not just in my head saying what you want to hear, and now that I know you are I wanna know why. Why do you say stuff like that? What do you want from me?" _

"_You're asking the wrong questions." She said surprising Daryl. She gets on top of him and straddles him, he tries to push her off but she pins him down. She was surprisingly strong. "You're never going to get answers this way. All you're doing is going around in circles. What are you afraid of? Your scars?"_

_ She runs her right hand down his chest, tracing the faint scars that stain his skin. He flinches as she runs her fingers over his stitched up wound. Not in pain though, he touch is so gentle he can barely feel it. _

"_Why do you hide yourself from me? I've shown you most of myself. You've seen my tats but won't let me see yours. Afraid that I'll be scared off by the demon on your back or are you afraid of me finding out about the demons you've been fighting all your life?" _

_ She frees his hands only to place both hands on his chest. She peers down into his face, her long brown locks fall down her shoulders framing her face. Her eyes are filled with fire and her lips are slightly puckered. Her gaze made him squirm, an uncomfortable feeling flowed through him. _

"_Who are you Daryl Dixon? What do you really want?" _

_ He lunged at her and flipped her on her back. The small bed creaked loudly as she landed on her back with Daryl pinning her. She let out a gasp and tried to catch her breath but he slammed his mouth onto hers. She returned the kiss just as eagerly and feral as he was. _

Daryl quickly sat up in his bed and snapped out of his dream. He grabbed his head in pain from the sudden movement and waited for the room to stop spinning. His heart was pounding and he could almost feel the blood rushing through his veins. Cursing to himself he fell back onto the bed and covered his face in embarrassment. Daryl tried to convince his himself that it was the injury and the medication messing with his head and he believed it for the most part. He had spent years hardening his heart but there was a part of him that knew it was a lie. A part of him that knew the pain he went through, knew his true feelings and what he really wanted. He wanted to move on from his past, he wanted to forget the pain, he wanted to find his brother, he wanted to feel accepted, he wanted to find a place where he belonged, and even though he was trying hard not to he wanted Natalie.

* * *

_*The Next Day*/ Natalie's POV _

"You coming?" Shane shouts at Glenn. Some of the others were going to go gun training but I decided to hang back, Maggie was going to teach me how to ride a horse before going out into town.

"I gotta help Dale clean the spark plugs on the RV." I turn and give him a look. He's been acting really strange today and I don't know why. He's been avoiding eye contact with people and acting skittish. "He said he's gonna teach me mechanics. I should probably go look for him.

"You found me." Dale says from behind us. "He's a good learner." We watch the others drive away. "Spark plugs, huh?"

"Yeah Glenn you've been acting weird. Is everything okay?" I ask him.

"Want to tell me what's going on?"

"You're old. I mean not you Natalie! Dale, you're... You know things."

"You really have a way with words Glenn. You know that?" I say

"So. What if somebody told you something that somebody else should know...?"

"Glenn, stop being dramatic. Spit it out." Dale says. Glenn looks at me uncertain.

"It's okay, you can tell Dale." I reassure him.

"There's... there's walkers in the barn and Lori's pregnant."

"See was that so… wait WHAT!" My jaw drops and I think Dale's eyes are about to pop out of his head.

"Wait hold up. When did you find out about the walkers and do you know why they are there?"

"Well I went there to meet Maggie last night-"

"Oh jeeze Glenn what did I say?" Dale says disappointed.

"What did you say?" I ask

"Can we please focus?" Glenn asks. "So I found out last night but she won't tell me why. Just that I shouldn't tell anyone."

"And we won't." Dale says.

"But-"

"Not yet anyway." Dales says cutting me off. "I saw Hershel go to the stables earlier. He must have a reason for all of this. I'll go talk to him and find out more about it."

"I'll come too. I have to meet with Maggie at the stables soon anyway."

"Okay but just remember that they probably don't know as much about Walkers as we do. They haven't had as much experience as us."

* * *

We make our way to the stables. Hershel is in there brushing a horse that is tied up.

"Nervous Nelly?" Dale asks. "She found her way home?"

"Found her in her stall this morning."

"She okay?" I asked.

"A little shaken but physically she's seem alright."

"I love your fields." Dale said out of the blue. "Took a long walk this morning. I ended up by the barn. I heard the moans."

"That's unfortunate." Hershel said.

"I'm sure you have your reasons for keeping this a secret."

"I understand everything's been really confusing Hershel." I say as calmly as I can. "But you do know that keeping them in there is dangerous right?"

"I saw the broadcasts before they stopped, saw the irrational fear, the atrocities, like the incident at my well."

"We put down a walker-"

"You killed a person."

"Well, if you watched the same broadcasts I did, you saw walkers attack, kill. They're dangerous." Dale said.

"A paranoid schizophrenic is dangerous too. We don't shoot sick people."

"Hershel it's different." I say "They've lost their humanity. They're only focused on food and don't care who they hurt to get it."

"I don't believe that. There are good and kind people in there. People who can't help themselves because they are sick."

"With all due respect, you are cut off from the outside world here." Dale said. "But I've seen people that I cared about die and come back, and they're not people."

"My wife and stepson are in that barn." Oh no… it's going to be harder than I thought it would. "They're people."

"I'm sorry." I say.

"Me too." Dale says. "Let me help. I'll speak to Rick. He's a good man. We can make the barn more secure, keep everybody safe."

"The barn is secure." Hershel says. "Keep this to yourself if you want to help. Rick is a man of conscience, but are you so sure about everyone in your group?"

He had us there. Even though Rick wouldn't like the situation he would at least try to be civil about. However, if Shane found out he won't hesitate to take them out and then Hershel will kick us off the farm. As much as I would like to have the walkers taken care of I don't think I can do it if it means hurting the Greene's and being exiled. But then that means I'd be keeping a huge secret from everyone else; a secret that could get us all killed if that barn isn't as secure as Hershel said it is.

"Hey Natalie, ready to ride?" I look over to see Maggie coming toward me with a smile on her face. "Am I interrupting something?"

"I was just leaving. Gotta set up the grill if I'm gonna make lunch for everyone." Dale says and walks out. He looked uncomfortable which made Maggie confused. I try to shake off the dread I was feeling and act like nothing was wrong.

"I'm ready."

"Good. Then meet Murphy, he's a little and slow but he's the best horse we have for beginners."

I look in the stall and see Murphy. He was a huge rust colored horse with an auburn mane. He had a white marking that reminded me of a cross on his forehead and long legs. I felt like a dwarf standing next him and I backed up nervously.

"Um, do you have anything in a smaller size?"

"Relax. I'll give you a leg up to get on."

"I'm more worried about falling off than getting on."

"You'll be fine. Murph is the gentlest horse we got. I'll go get his saddle and we can get started."

"Maggie when you'll done I want to talk to you." Hershel says undoing the ropes that held Nervous Nelly in place and leading her back to her stall.

"Okay." She says and goes to get the saddle.

I stand there awkwardly waiting for Maggie as Hershel puts Nervous Nelly back in her stall and walked out the barn looking upset. Why do I get the feeling he's gonna tell Maggie we know about the walkers? Great, and here I thought my biggest concern for the day was trying not to fall off a horse.

* * *

Maggie ended up taking me to a field to practice riding. She explained to me the basics like how to go, stop, steer, speed up and slow down before we started. Unfortunately when she gave me the leg up the horse started to move before I could actually sit on the saddle and I ended up falling on my butt. However once that was out of the way it wasn't that bad, Murphy really was the gentlest horse and he was pretty slow. My nerves calmed down and even though I still didn't like being off the ground I was able to balance myself well enough.

When we were done she went to find her father while I went to go eat lunch with the others. I was walking a little funny though because I was sore from riding; god I really don't get how some people could go riding for hours.

"So the shooting lessons went well?" I ask as I sat down on one of the folding chairs and ate with some of the others.

"Sure did." Rick says. "Everyone did pretty well."

"Yeah once Jimmy cut it out with the gangster shit." T-Dog chipped in which cause everyone to laugh.

"Seriously?" I ask.

"Come with us next time and see for yourself." T-dog said. "The way you used to shoot with that bow you'd probably get the hang of a gun in no time."

"I do miss the bow… I'll think about it but now I have to get ready to head out into town."

I get up off the chair and make my way over to the tents to grab my stuff. Along the way there though I see a plate of food sitting outside Daryl's tent. I bend over to shoo some flies away and check to see if it's still edible before calling out to him.

"Your food's going bad."

"I'll get it in a minute."

"I don't think the flies will give you a minute. What are you-"

"Stop barging in!" he quickly stuffs something behind him as I open his tent.

"What? Woodworking isn't exactly something to be ashamed of. What are you working on that's more important than eating?"

"Stuff, for hunting."

"Okay? I'm going out into town for stuff, you need anything?" I look around in his tent and see an open book, I pick it up and look at the title. The Case of the Missing Man. "Maybe a better book?"

"You read it?"

"It was required for one of my English lectures in college. The author puts in so much pretentious crap to try to deceive the readers into thinking they are reading an original masterpiece and not another cliché mystery novel."

"So it's not worth the read?"

"You're better off working on your mystery project. Okay I really have to go now. Do you need anything?"

"I wouldn't say no to a pack of smokes."

I leave his tent and go grab my backpack to dump it out for the trip. Some junk I don't need falls out but what catches my eye is the Polaroid's that flutter onto the ground. Staring back at me are pictures of Amy, Sophia and some of the others from the Atlanta camp. I pick up the one of Sophia, she's playing with Eliza and has a huge smile on her face. My stomach clenches as I look at it, she shouldn't be lost. She should be with us, with a big smile on her face and playing with Carl. I put the down with the others and push it off into a corner; focusing on gathering what I need to head out. After getting my hunting knife and throwing knives in their proper place I sling the mostly empty backpack on my shoulder and leave the tent. Glenn took a piece of paper from Lori before meeting up with me.

"She take your advice about taking care of herself? Wants prenatal vitamins or something for the baby."

"Yeah, yeah stuff like that." He says not looking at me.

"Glenn why'd you say it like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like that. All evasive, let me see the list."

He reluctantly hands me the list and I read it over. There's simple stuff like lotion, worthless stuff like conditioner (who needs to worry about that now?), and some other items but what catches my attention is the morning-after pill. I guess that explains why Glenn looks so uncomfortable and why Lori looked so skittish.

"Huh. Guess she figured out what she wanted to do. How do you think Rick reacted when he found out?"

"Uhh…" I hold out my arm and stop him as we were almost to the stable.

"She didn't tell him did she?"

"Not exactly…"

"Son of a bitch! How many secrets are we going to have to keep?"

"Just one more, I'll handle Lori on my own but can you help me with Maggie?"

"Glenn you shouldn't have to help Lori. This should be between her and Rick, the fact that she's dragging you into this and doing her dirty work for you is wrong. The longer secrets get dragged out it worsens the consequences."

"Even the barn one?" We get closer to the stables and see Maggie with the horses.

"Even the barn. I'll try to help you out with Maggie, it sounds like her dad thinks they're still people but they're just sick. She might think that as well." We reach Maggie and she turns to look at us.

"Hey Maggie." Glenn says. She glares at him and gives Glenn the reins to the horse.

"Why are there three?" I ask.

"I'm coming too."

She walks over to her horse and mounts it. I walk over to Murphy and try to get up on my own only to find that my short legs are getting in the way. Glenn has to come over and give me a leg up before he mounts his own horse and we head out. Only the sound of clopping hoaves can be heard as we make our way into town. There was a tension in the air as Maggie tried not to look at me or Glenn.

"You didn't have to come." Glenn said breaking the silence. "You could hate me from a distance." He takes a pause for her to respond but she doesn't. "Please say something. Maggie, I-"

"I asked for your trust and you betrayed it. And I found out that you knew Natalie because you confronted my dad, now he's pissed at me. Your turn."

"I'm sorry Maggie." I said. "But I had to find out why. Your dad may think they're sick but what about you?"

"Do you agree with that?" Glenn asked and she looks towards the ground to avoid answering. "Even after what you saw at the well?"

"I'm not sure what I saw at the well."

"Yes, you are." We reach the store and get off our horses to tie them up. "Look, if you'd seen Atlanta, you would not have a barn full of walkers."

"I wish you'd stop calling them that."

"What do you call them?"

"Mom, Shawn, Mr. and Mrs. Fischer, Lacey, Duncan."

Once the horses are tied securely to the pillars outside we go into the pharmacy. It looks mostly picked over but there is still some stuff left. Hopefully a good amount of it will be useful.

"What does she want now?" Maggie asks annoyed, finally someone else who shares my frustration with Lori.

"I can't say." Glenn asks.

"So when one of them asks you to keep your mouth shut-"

"Look can we please talk about this later?" I interrupt her. "Here's the list, can you please help since you know your way around?"

She takes the list from me and looks at it. When she sees the plan B she looks up at us angry before walking off and muttering something under breath. I split up from Glenn and start looking around. I pick up some stuff from the feminine hygiene section and other isles before I head back to the pharmacy. I pass Maggie as she's looking at the shelves and head to back room to look around, once she's done there I can look without her getting suspicious. In the back is a small room with a desk and shelves filled with boxes. I look on the desk and see a book with stock inventory, an old lamp, an empty dusty coffee cup and a pill bottle. I pick it up and read the label, temazepam , it's not the same amount I used to take but I'm not going to look a gift horse in the mouth. I pocket it in my bag and I'm about to leave when something catches my eye. On the floor is a pack of cigarettes, I roll my eyes but pick it up anyway.

"No! No!" that's Maggie! "No! Glenn!"

"Maggie!" Glenn shouts.

I run out of the stock room and straight to Maggie's side. The walker was on the other side of the shelf and was trying to pull her through it by her arm. The shelves were shaking as they were fighting. I pull one of my throwing knives out of my belt and start stabbing at it's hands hoping it would let go of Maggie.

"Look out!" I look and shove Maggie out of the way as Glenn jumps on the counter and smashes the walker's head with a shelf he took from the front of the store. He then goes to comfort a distraught Maggie.

"Did it get you? Did it bite you?"

I look at the walker just as it rises to its feet. Its head was threating to fall off as the rip in the neck gets bigger. I reach for the machete in Glenn's belt and cut the head clean off. It falls to the ground and I stab at the head to really kill it. Behind me Maggie is sobbing in Glenn's arms.

"We should leave." I tell them "If there's more of them out there they'll be attracted to all the noise we made."

I move the head and body out of the way so Maggie didn't have to stare at it as she walked out. We got on our horses and made our way back to the farm. Maggie was silent the whole way there and wouldn't respond if Glenn or I asked how she was doing. When we got back we put the horses back in the stables and Maggie stormed off towards the camp. Glenn and I followed here worried about what she might do when she went up to Lori.

"Hey! We got your stuff."

"Maggie, hang on, please." Glenn called out to her.

"Come on in here." Lori said.

"Why? Nothing to hide. We got your special delivery right here. We got your lotion, got your conditioner, your Soap Opera Digest." She said as she threw the stuff on the ground.

"Maggie."

"Next time you want something, get it your damn self. We're not your errand boys."

"Honey, I-"

"And here's your abortion pills!"

She storms off and we stand there in silence. Lori has a shocked look on her face, Glenn looks torn between going after Maggie and comforting Lori, and I'm just standing there wishing I was anywhere but here.

"Go after her Glenn. I know you want to." He nods and walks away from us. I try to walk away too but Lori grabs my arm.

"Wait-"

"Don't." I pull my arm away from her. "Just… are you absolutely sure you want to do this?" I asked her.

"I…"

"That's what I thought. Look I'm not judging you for these." I say picking up the pills. "I just want to know if this is all worth it. Are you willing to lie to your husband and ruin your marriage if he finds out without you telling him? Are you willing to have Maggie, Glenn or someone else risk their life so you can keep this a secret? Is this secret worth losing the people that you care about?"

"You don't understand. It's more complicated than that."

"I know about Shane." Her eyes widen in shock. "I may not understand how being with that asshole was able to help you with your grief-"

"Don't call him that."

"But that's not important. What is important is taking care of your family who you should be grateful to still have and owning up to your mistakes. I'm talking about whether or not you keep the baby, I have no right to take that choice away from you, but I do believe that you should tell Rick about it because secrets only do more harm than good."

I walk away from her and down the trail wanting to get as far away from the farm as possible.

* * *

I ended up taking a longer walk than I thought. I was too deep in thought and focused on getting as far away from the camp as possible that I ended up not keeping track of where I was. The others will probably have a field day about this, especially given with what happened with Daryl yesterday, but I really don't give a shit right now as I stumble across a pretty lake. It looks so peaceful and serene with the little dock and boat in it and I definitely could use some peacefulness right about now.

I cross the marshy grass and make my way onto the dock. I take off my boots before sitting on the edge of the dock dipping my feet in. A chill runs through my body when I dip my toes in the water. I let out a deep breath, close my eyes and lean my head back to feel the sun on my face. The warmth radiates through my body as the rays shine brightly in my face making my tense muscles loosen as they finally relax.

"What the hell are you doing?" I tense but turn around to find the source of the voice.

"Me? Aren't you supposed to be resting?" I asked as Daryl walks onto the dock.

"I was but then I saw you storming off. No one else was going after you so I figured I'd have to haul your ass back."

"I'm fine. Just wanted to cool off and ended up finding this place."

"Reminds me of the quarry."

"Yeah it does. I miss swimming in it. It was always fun and peaceful."

"Till you found out Merle was poking around being a peeping tom."

"Hey it's his fault he got caught. He's about as quiet as a bull in a china shop and there weren't too many places to hide."

"He's not that bright. I'd blame it on his other head but his real head is just as dumb." I laugh at that.

"Speaking of heads how's yours?"

"Which one are you asking about?"

"Fuck you!"

"Finally! Been getting tired of all the sympathy. It's annoying as hell."

"Isn't everything annoying to you?"

"Watch it-"

"You're the one who's tired of sympathy. Besides you didn't even answer my question."

"I'm fine. You're the one that needed to cool off. What happened?"

I bite my lip trying to figure out what to say. Part of me wants to tell him everything in get it off my chest but then I'll just be burdening him. Besides Lori's pregnancy isn't his problem and if I told him about the barn he might do something drastic.

"We went to the pharmacy- oh that reminds me." I reach into my backpack behind me and pull out the cigarettes. "Got your cancer sticks."

"Good brand too. Nice job." He pulls on out and lights it with a lighter he had in his pocket for some reason.

"Gross. Anyway Maggie was looking through the pharmacy of the store when a walker popped up and grabbed her through the shelf. She's fine but shaken up from what happened."

"That why she was ranting and raving about something at camp?"

"Yeah. I think she was just upset because that was the first real time she was in danger. I don't blame her because I wouldn't want to die just to bring someone a magazine or some lotion."

"That what got you pissed?"

"Not exactly. It's kind of a little bit of everything. I feel like I'm going to explode if one more bad thing happens."

He doesn't say anything, just continues to smoke his cigarette as we sit in a comfortable silence. I watch the smoke blow in the wind over the pound and disintegrate in the air. The smell of tobacco lingers making me feel slightly tired and out of breath but I don't complain. I just sit there enjoying the nice weather while he finishes it.

"You ready to head back?" he flicks the cigarette into the water and stands up.

"Yeah." I take his hand and he helps me up. I try to take my hand away but he holds onto my wrist. There's a devilish smirk on his face and mischief in his eyes. He's not going to do what I think he is, right?

"Daryl don't you dare-"

Next thing I know I'm being hauled off my feet and I'm flying through the air. The last thing I see is his smirking face before I'm submerged in water and my vision goes blurry. My body is in shock as I sink in the water before rage takes over and pushes me to the surface. I gasp for breath as I tread water and look up to see that redneck bastard kneeling on the dock watching me.

"What the hell was that for?"

"Said you needed to cool off didn't you? You didn't look ready to go back."

"So you just threw me in? Do you have a death wish or something?"

"Pretty sure if I did I'd do something more reckless."

"Whatever." I reach out my hand to him. "Help me up?"

"You're just gonna try to pull me aren't you?"

"I highly doubt I'm strong enough to pull you in. Now will you please help me up? I think I fish is trying to get it on with my leg."

He rolls his eyes and reaches down. He grabs my hand and leans forward to pull me up, I gin evilly as I take advantage of his weight disproportion and pull him into the lake. He lets out an angry yell as we fall into the water with a loud splash. Underwater I watch him flail around angrily. I couldn't help but laugh to myself as I enjoyed the taste of sweet revenge. The flailing stops though as he calms down and looks right at me. Shit! I start to swim away from him as fast I could when I saw the rage in his eyes. He was probably going to drown me and leave my body here to be eaten by the fishes. My lungs start to burn as I swim and I make my way up to the surface. I gasp for air as I come up and look around for Daryl. I don't see him though, I don't even see bubbles to let me know where he is underwater.

"Daryl?" I call out worried, what if he can't swim? WHY AM I THINKING OF THIS NOW? Oh god I'm so stupid how could I-

Something wraps around my waist and pulls me underwater. I squirm to try to break free but the grip tightens around me. As I beat my fist against it I realize that it feels hard, I open my eyes to stare right into Daryl's and boy does he look pissed as he takes us up for air.

"You bitch!" He shouts as he gasps for air.

"It's your own fault-"I stop to laugh at the look on his face "I wasn't going to until you suggested it."

"It's not funny!" he says seriously which makes me laugh harder.

I think there might be tears rolling down my face from how hard I'm laughing but I don't care. Daryl's serious face softens and he starts laughing too, a nice deep throaty laugh. It makes me feel happier hearing it because Daryl rarely laughs. Sure I've heard him chuckle, snort or huff at something someone said but I don't think I've ever heard him really laugh before. It's infectious and makes me laugh even harder, so hard that I can barely tread water and have to throw my arms around him to support myself. His arms wrap around my waist and hold me up, my legs wrap around his torso before I realize what I did. But when I did, oh boy is this awkward! He stops laughing and looks me in the eye. Both of us are breathing heavily and water is dripping down us. His hair is plastered to his forehead, drops of water dripping down his face. My heart feels like it's going to explode out of my chest as I feel his breath hit my neck. My body feels tingly and I'm reminded of one of those sappy chick flicks that Reese would make me watch from time to time. I always hated the unrealistic situations and the way it romanticizes every situation possible. But I guess some of them lingered in me because I keep thinking about how hot and romantic it would be if we kissed right now. Fuck! Stop it!

I can't seem to stop my hand as I unwrap one of my arms from around his neck and brush his hair out of his eyes. Why? Why the hell would you do that? He catches his breath and flinches a little as my hand moves his hair out of his face. When he opens his eyes I see a look of shock and… something else? I'm still breathing heavily as I feel his arms slide from around my back and grips my sides, pushing me away.

"C'mon, stop messing around gotta swim back."

My throat catches and I have to nod my head to respond. We swim to shore and pull ourselves onto the grass. The water drips off our clothes and the dirt sticks to us turning into mud. Daryl's looking over my shoulder staring at something, I turn my head and see tall white flowers blooming at the edge of the lake.

"Cherokee roses." I say smiling.

"Yeah, a couple of them."

"That's a good sign then. Isn't it?"

"Yeah."

We start walking back to the camp. It turns out I didn't walk as far as I thought I did but just did a big circle around the farm. I'm glad that I don't have to walk too far back because I'm exhausted but I do wish that I more time for my clothes to dry. Now I have to think of an excuse about why Daryl and I came back all wet.

* * *

_*Sometime later*_

The sun was setting as Shane and Andrea drove up to the farm. Dale, Carol and I were waiting for them because they went to check out a housing development close by for Sophia. As angry as I am about Andrea shooting Daryl I'm trying to control it. Daryl doesn't seem to be holding it against her and obsessing over it isn't going to do me any good. When they got out of the car we walked up wanting to know what they heard.

"Anything?" Carol asked.

"Not today." Shane said.

"I'm so sorry. We'll cover more ground tomorrow." Andrea said.

"What happened out there?" Dale asked, he wasn't too thrilled to hear Andrea was out with Shane. He's been anxious for her to come back since everyone else returned from gun practice.

"Um, I"

"The place was overrun." Shane interrupted her.

"Yeah." Andrea agrees but she looks… a little happy? I look back and forth between her and Shane and feel weird vibes coming off them, vibes that make my skin crawl. Dale has the same look on my face as I do and then it hits me. Are you freaking kidding me? First Lori and now Andrea? Who else gonna take a ride on Shane's di-

"Let's go get you cleaned up."

Carol interrupts my thoughts and starts to lead Andrea into the house. Shane walks away but Dale tries to go after him. I follow from a reasonable distance to make sure Dale doesn't get himself into deep shit.

"Shane. Shane, I was thinking, you've got that nice new ride of yours, plenty of fuel, more than enough for you to get far from here." Whoa. I knew Dale was protective of Andrea but I didn't expect this.

"What, you telling me to leave?" Shane asks.

"I know you've been planning to. Maybe now is a good time." Did I miss something? When was Shane going to leave?

Shane scoffs at that. "Is this about Andrea?"

"I'm looking out for the group."

"You think the group would be better off without me, Dale? Why don't you tell that to Rick or Lori? Their boy would be dead if I hadn't put my ass on the line."

"And Otis's. You've been vague about that night, about what happened." So I'm not the only one that thought so huh? But there's no proof, confronting Shane about it now is just reckless.

"Otis died a hero."

"So you've said."

"A little boy lived because of what went down that night. I think you ought to show some gratitude." God he was such an ass! Who says stuff like that?

"I wasn't there."

"No, man, you weren't."

"But I was the time that you raised your gun on Rick." What? My stomach clenches at his words. When was that?

"Come on."

"You had him in your sights and you held him there." Shane neither confirmed nor denied it. "I know what kind of man you are."

"You think I'd shoot Rick? That is my best friend. That's the man that I love. I love him like he's my brother. You think that's the kind of man I am?"

"That's right."

"Well, maybe we ought to just think that through. Say I'm the kind of man who'd gun down his own best friend. What do you think I'd do to some guy that I don't even like when he starts throwing accusations my way? What do you think?" He glares at Dale and that sets me off. I walk forward to break it up.

"Hey. What's going on?"

"Just a simple conversation." Dale says with a hint of fear in his voice.

"None of your business." Shane says

"Maybe but it looks like a pretty heated conversation from where I'm standing. Can't help but want to make sure everything's okay." Shane turns and walks toward me.

"What did you hear?" he asks with a crazed look in his coal black eyes. My throat feels dry and I feel nauseas as he locks eyes with me but I try not to let my fear show.

"Not a lot." Not a lot that really surprised me. I had a feeling he did something to Otis.

"You better not be lying. Even though you haven't put up much of a fight with me lately I still don't trust you."

"Same here. How can I trust someone who gets all defensive about a simple conversation?"

"Watch your tone. I've been going easy on you but don't think I'm going to let you walk all over me. I will deal with you if you ever stand in my way."

He walks away from me and chills run down my back. It wasn't his words that scared me but the look in his eyes. Dale comes up to me and he also looks shocked over what just happened.

"Are you okay?" he asks me.

"Is it true?" I ask him.

"You heard?" he asks. I nod my head. "But you said-"

"I kind of lied. I heard everything but not all of it was news to me. I also thought his story about Otis didn't add up but I didn't know about him planning to leave or trying to shoot Rick. When was that?"

"Well I believe he was planning to leave around the time Sophia went missing but I was there when he tried to shoot Rick. It was after the walker attack at the quarry. We were doing a perimeter check and they were butting heads. I went to check on something but when I turned around Shane was aiming his gun at an unsuspecting Rick. He wasn't blinking or anything, just had this cold and determined look on his face. When I called out to him he snapped out of it and acted like nothing happened. I didn't bring it up because I wasn't entirely sure what was going on and I didn't think anyone would believe me if I did."

"I believe you."

"Did he threaten you? I couldn't hear but if he did we can't let him get away with it."

"It's not that. Shane's always been an asshole so his words never bothered me but this time was different. What bothered was his eyes. That cold blank stare, almost lifeless, those are the eyes of a mad man."

"How do you know?"

"I've seen them before." The image of the man shot me appears in my mind. Graying fair hair and crazed beady eyes staring at me from behind the barrel of a gun. There's something familiar about him but I can't put my finger on it yet. "And if I'm right, then were all in trouble."

* * *

**to be continued. Hope you all enjoyed it, I ended up putting more in than I thought. A little drama, a little fluff, some suspense and some teasing. I really didn't plan ahead of time like I usually do to write the scene at the lake or the very beginning with Daryl. It just sort of came to me and I wrote it all down surprised by how much I got out of it and how right it felt to put it in here. **

**Please feel free to favorite or follow the story if you haven't already and as always all reviews are welcomed. Thank you guys so much for being so supportive especially when I have doubts about the story. But I won't give up because I do have a vision for the end and I want to see it through even if it takes a long time! I won't give up unless I absolutely have no idea what to do next and even if I ever do feel like working on other projects I would do it either simultaneously or wait until I have the new story mostly if not all the finished before posting it. **

**My words of nonsense for the day: Beware the addictiveness of binge watching! (I've have discovered the joy, craziness, and obsession with anime on Netflix and Crunchyroll. I'm ashamed it took me so long to try it because my dad still teases me because of how much I loved pokemon and other cartoons growing up.)**


	30. Pretty Much Dead Already

**A/N: Wouldn't you know it that after I posted the last chapter and vowed to get back on track with this I woke up the next day with the stomach flu? No? Well apparently it happened! But now I'm 100% better and here is the next chapter! Hopefully I won't get sick again once I upload this.**

**LadyCaysie: Thanks doll! I was hoping they were good because I always get nervous when I post original scenes.**

**Disclaimer: I think we all know the drill by now. I don't own it so let's get to it!**

_Italics:_ **mean** **thoughts. **

_**Bold Italics: mean sound.**_

* * *

Pretty Much Dead Already

All was quiet. We were all sitting around the camp eating breakfast, the sound of forks scraping against plates and people chewing echoed through the camp. It was peaceful but I knew it wasn't going to last. Glenn was acting uneasy, the weight of the secret he's been carrying on his shoulders was getting to him. He was looking towards the house at Maggie who had her arms cross and a glare on her face. She was shaking her head at him so I can only assume he decided to come clean against her wishes. He looks towards us, Dale at his place at the grill gives Glenn an encouraging nod and I let out a sigh but nod my head as well. I know this isn't going to end well but this was Glenn's choice to make and we'll just have to deal with the fallout.

"Um, guys." Some of the others look at him. "So...The barn is full of walkers."

Everyone stops what they're doing to stare at Glenn. Rick and Shane look shocked and angry, actually Shane looked more furious. He started to head for the barn with a determined look on his face and Rick tried his best to keep up with him. Soon enough everyone was following them leaving me, Glenn and Dale at the camp.

"Yeah… you've got to work on your delivery Glenn." I say getting out of my chair and running to catch up with the others. Shane was getting close to the barn while the rest of us kept our distance. He peered in through a crack in the wall before walking back to us looking pissed.

"You cannot tell me you're all right with this." He said to Rick.

"No I'm not, but we're guests here. This isn't our land."

"This is our lives!"

"Lower your voice." Glenn said.

"We shouldn't make a scene until we figure out what we're gonna do." I say

"We can't just sweep this under the rug." Andrea said.

"It ain't right." Shane said. "Not remotely. Okay, we've either got to go in there, we've got to make things right or we've just got to go. Now we have been talking about fort Benning for a long time."

"We can't go."

"Why, Rick? Why?"

"You know why Shane." I say

"Because my daughter is still out there." Carol says.

"Okay. Okay, I think it's time that we all start to just consider the other possibility."

"No way in hell."

"We're not leaving Sophia behind." Rick says.

"I'm close to finding this girl. I just found her damn doll two days ago.

"You found her doll, Daryl. That's what you did. You found a doll.

"You don't know what the hell you're talking about." Daryl says as Shane turns around to talk to all of us.

"I'm just saying what needs to be said. You get a good lead, it's in the first 48 hours."

"Shane, stop." Rick tries to stop him but Shane ignores him.

"Let me tell you something else, man." He turns back to Daryl. "If she was alive out there and saw you coming all methed out with your buck knife and geek ears around your neck, she would run in the other direction!"

"Shut up-"

"Daryl stop!" I try to get Daryl to back off but he won't listen. He was trying to charge Shane and everyone had to get involved to break them up. Rick ended up being the one to split them up and I stayed by Daryl's side to keep him away from Shane. Though it was hard because every part of me wanted to punch Shane in the face until I broke his nose.

"Now just let me talk to Hershel. Let me figure it out." Rick says.

"What are you gonna figure out?!" Shane yells trying to get in Ricks face only to have Lori get between them.

"If we're gonna stay, if we're gonna clear this barn, I have to talk him into it. This is his land."

"It's not going to be easy." I say. "He has them in there for a reason."

"Hershel sees those things in there as people" Dale says "...Sick people... His wife, his stepson."

"You knew? Both of you?" Rick asks incredulously.

"Not for long, just a little before Glenn told all of you."

"Yesterday we talked to Hershel." Dale said.

"And you waited the night?" Shane yelled at us.

"It's secure Shane! Do you really think we wouldn't have told anyone if we thought it was an immediate danger?" I snap at him

"I thought we could survive one more night." Dale said. "We did. I was waiting till this morning to say something. But Glenn wanted to be the one."

"The man is crazy, Rick, if Hershel thinks those things are alive or no-"

The moaning grew louder and the chains started to rattle as the walkers started to pound on the door. It budged slightly but the chains and the board held them in place, even though I just said it was secure I couldn't help but take a step back. Just the thought of over a dozen hungry walkers being a couple yards away from us with only old wooden doors separating us made my heart race.

"Can we finish this someplace else?" I asked. "We're just aggravating them."

"No need to finish." Rick said. "I'm going to go talk to Hershel about it then we're going to get back to looking for Sophia."

"You do what you want man." Shane said. "I'm gonna check to see just how secure this thing really is."

"Shane just leave it alone." I say.

"Just gonna look. You'd think I'd put anyone in danger?" He mocks my words from earlier and approaches the barn.

"That's exactly what I'm afraid of." I mutter to myself as I walk away from the barn following the others.

* * *

The warm breeze carries the scent of fresh grass and the strong smell of horses and hay to the top of the RV. The rifle is gripped firmly in my hands as I stand and keep a look out, waiting for Glenn to come and take over. I can see Shane pacing by the barn like a watchdog, which is exactly what I wanted to avoid but the truth had to come out eventually. But it doesn't look like it's doing too much for Glenn who is coming towards me dripping in some type of goo.

"What happened to you?" I ask gesturing to his ruined hat and the wet eggshell that was on his head.

"Maggie's still mad at me."

"Told you it was too soon."

"Yeah but you didn't tell me she'd try to scramble me."

"Gotta give her points for originality though. If it was me I would've just punched you."

"You're not helping."

"Just give it a little more time. She's too angry now because she thinks you betrayed her but once you explain you did it to protect her and everyone else she'll understand."

I catch something out of the corner of my eye and raise the binoculars to check it out. Making his way towards the stables was Daryl. Damn it, he was supposed to be resting.

"Glenn can you take over?" I ask him.

"Yeah."

Putting down the riffle I climb down the ladder and start jogging towards the stable hoping to catch up to him in time. I was almost there when he walked into the stables.

"Hey!" I shout as I run in. "What are you doing?"

"Not going to waste any more time. Gonna pick up where I left off and go after her."

"You're still recovering though and you didn't tell anyone you were going to leave."

"Don't you talk to me about keeping secrets!" he shouts at me. I roll my eyes.

"Don't tell me you're angry at me too. I only did it because I didn't want anyone to do anything rash."

"So you didn't trust me? You just think I would have done something to put y'all in danger?"

"It's not you I don't trust it's- it doesn't matter. The reason I didn't tell is because I didn't want to get us kicked out before we could find Sophia."

"That's why I'm going out. We find her we don't have to worry about that, now are you going to just stand there or are you coming with me?" He goes around back to get the saddle, when he comes back he tosses it on the saddle rack only to grunt and hold his side.

"Let me help." I say walking up to him.

"You can't." I turn to see Carol coming towards us with a worried look on her face.

"I'm fine." He said.

"Hershel said you need to heal."

"Yeah I already tried that Carol, didn't work." I said.

"Yeah, I don't care." He said grabbing a bridle and opening a stall.

"Well, I do and so does Natalie. Rick's going out later to follow the trail."

"Yeah well, I ain't gonna sit around and do nothing."

"No, you're gonna go out there and get yourself hurt even worse." He ignores her and I let out a sigh.

"I'm going out with him Carol. I'll make sure he's safe and we'll look for her."

"I can't allow that." She says to me before looking back at Daryl. "We don't know if we're gonna find her, Daryl. We don't."

Daryl stops what he's doing with the horse and turns around to look at Carol. I'm in shock over hearing what she just said.

"Carol-"

"I don't." She interrupts me with watery eyes. I bite my tongue, not sure what to say. Daryl walks up to her glaring at her.

"What?" he asks unnervingly.

"Can't lose you too. Either of you."

He stares at her silently before dropping the bridle and walking away. He turns to look at me but I can't say anything. Then out of nowhere he shoves the saddle onto the ground so hard that he groans and holds his injured side in pain.

"Daryl!"

"Are you all right?" Carol and I try to go to him but he pushes us away.

"Just leave me be! Stupid bitch." He says as he walks away from us.

"I just-"

"I know. Don't take it seriously." I say to Carol.

"He got so angry when I said that. I don't want to believe it either but with what Shane said about forty-eight hours-"She sobs and wipes a tear from her eye.

"Hey." I put my hand on her shoulder comfortingly. "That's not always true. I know someone who was younger than Sophia when they were lost in the woods for over a week before they found their way home."

"And they weren't harmed?"

"Unless you count an itchy ass from using poison oak as toilet paper than no they were fine." I try to joke but she doesn't laugh. "Look, I'll go talk to him. But please, don't lose faith. We'll find her."

I exit the barn and look around for him but I don't see him. Damn how does he move so fast with a pain in his side? He better be back at the camp otherwise I'm going to be pissed off if I have to search the whole farm for him. I make my way towards the camp passing Beth and Patricia who were carrying laundry baskets and reaching the tents. I look around but the only people I see are Lori and Carl.

"Hey kid." I say walking up to him reading at the fire pit.

"I'm not a kid." He says.

"Sorry, force of habit that's not going to go away easily. I'm looking for Daryl. Have you seen him?"

"No. Are you two going to look for Sophia?" he asked.

"We were supposed to but he's still not feeling well. I just want to check on him before I go out with your dad to look for her."

"You think we'll find her too?"

"Of course I do."

"Shane thinks we should stop looking for her."

"That's bullshit- don't tell anyone I said that to you. I'm not going to give up until I find her, I can promise you that."

"I don't want to either. Take me with you, I can help."

"I know you want to but your parents will have a field day with me if I did." He looks upset and I come up with an idea. "Besides I need you to help me with a project for Sophia."

"A project?"

"Yeah, I wanted to give her a gift when she got back but I haven't had enough time to make it."

"What is it?"

"A collage of photos. I thought could take some nice photos around the farm and combine them with some older ones, give her something nice to look at and remember some happier times. So when you have time do you want to take some photos?"

"Okay. For Sophia."

"What's that supposed to mean? It's fun. Let me show you."

I motion for him to follow me to the tent. I open the flap and pick up the camera that's lying on the ground. "Okay this a polaroid camera. It's an older camera but it's really simple. This is the flash, this is the viewfinder, and this is where the photo comes out. You see that squirrel climbing the tree?" I point behind him and he turns. "Just bring it up to your eye, wait until you think it's the perfect moment and just-"I press the button and the camera makes a shutter sound. I gently grab the photo that comes out and show it Carl who watches curiously as the image appears.

"How do you know when it's the perfect moment?"

"You just do, the perfect moment is different for everyone. For me anyway I wait until I feel it in my gut that this is the moment I want to capture. That everything lined up so perfectly and I want to share it with someone else." I hand him the camera. "You should have enough for about eight more photos."

"Thanks. I think she'll like it."

"I do too kid. I do too."

He walks off and I continue to look for Daryl. I walk over towards the RV but no one's on the roof looking out. Where was Glenn? Or Dale for that matter. The doors open so maybe I should check to see if anyone's there.

"Dale? Glenn? Why is there-"I stop when I come face to face with Dale.

"Natalie-"

"What are you doing with the guns?" he has the bag slung over his shoulder.

"I was hoping no one would find out."

"You're getting rid of them aren't you?"

"Just hiding them for when we need them."

"But what if we can't get to them when we need them? What will the others do when they find out, what about Shane?"

"He's why I'm doing this. Do you believe he's really going to wait until Rick talks to Hershel to deal with the walkers if he has easy access to the guns? You know he's dangerous can't be trusted."

"I know Dale. That's why I'm hesitant about letting you go with those guns. I don't want him to hurt you for standing in his way."

"Natalie, I don't expect to last too long anyway."

"Don't say that."

"It's okay. I'm not a survivalist, I'm not like Rick, Daryl or Shane and that's alright. Because I can honestly say when the world went to shit I didn't let it take me down with me."

"Like it took down Shane…" I nod my head in understanding and turn to leave the RV. "Go, if anyone asks I haven't seen you." I leave the RV and continue looking for Daryl. There's only one other place he might be.

* * *

I walk down the path that leads to the lake only to see Daryl coming from the other direction. I feel my anger rise as I walk towards him and it gets worse the clearer I can see his stoic face.

"What the hell was that? Someone actually expresses concern about you and you flip out at them?" I shout at him.

"I don't need her concern. I don't need anyone's concern! What we should be concerned about is finding Sophia."

"We all are."

"Did you hear her talking back there? Did you see the look on her face? She really doubts we're not going to find her!"

"Of course she has doubts! Shane practically admitted he thinks she's dead and every day without her daughter is eating her alive! You of all people should understand what it feels like to be separated from your family. To wonder where they are, if they are hurt let alone living. Wondering if that was really the last time you would ever see them and what could you have done to change it because you promised to keep them safe and stay with them only to be completely powerless when they really need you!" I start hyperventilating as I finish, tears are flowing down my face and I'm panting to catch my breath. Daryl doesn't say anything though, he just stares at me.

"I failed… I failed my sister and now I've failed Sophia. She wanted me to promise I would protect her but I couldn't. That doesn't mean I won't stop looking for them, but it doesn't change the fact that I couldn't keep them safe." He walks closer to me, looking down into my eyes. There's no anger in them but rather and understanding.

"You done?" he asks. I nod my head. "C'mon. I was going to get Carol and apologize. You're gonna wanna see this too."

"You could told me that sooner. Why'd you yell at me?"

"You yelled at me first." I chuckle at that and he leads me back to camp. We find Carol sitting at one of the picnic tables.

"Come with us. I got something I want to show you." She looks hesitant but gets up. He leads us back to lake and we walk around the perimeter of it."

"You see it?" he says.

"See what?" Carol asks. I look down and see the Cherokee roses I spotted yesterday. It looks like more of them bloomed overnight.

"I'll find her." He says. I smile faintly looking down at the roses. Daryl's a bigger softy than I thought but it really is a sweet gesture towards Carol.

"Hey" Carol says breaking the silence. "I'm sorry about what happened this morning. You wanted to look for her. Why?" She asks Daryl. "This whole time I've wanted to ask you."

"'Cause I think she's still out there." He says. "Truth is, what else I got to do?" I can't help but feel sad when he says that. Like he still feels like an outcast with us but that's far from the truth. Daryl belongs here just as much as any of us. He just needs to realize it.

"We'll find her." Carol says reaching down to stroke a flower. "We will. I see it."

"Me too." I say looking at him with a smile. "I see it clearly."

* * *

I didn't realize how much time had passed but by now Rick and the others should be off looking for Sophia. We were walking back to the farm to drop Carol off and then Daryl and I would try to go catch up with the others. However as we got closer to the house we saw Maggie and Glenn talking with Andrea and T-Dog who were supposed to be with Rick.

"You haven't seen Rick?" I hear Glenn ask them.

"He went off with Hershel." Andrea said. "We were supposed to leave a couple hours ago."

"Yeah you were." Daryl says as we walk up. "What the hell?"

"Where'd he go?" I ask them.

"Don't know." Andrea said. "Rick told us he was going out."

"Damn it. Isn't anybody taking this seriously?" Daryl asks. "We got us a damn trail." I look behind him and see Shane walking towards us with the bag of guns slung over his shoulder and holding a rifle.

"Oh, here we go." Daryl says acknowledging Shane and goes towards him. I walk up to wondering what happened to Dales plan.

"Where's Dale?" I ask him angrily. "What did you do to him?"

"You knew didn't you?"

"Knew what? What's all this?" Daryl asks.

"You with me, man?" handing Daryl the gun he was holding.

"Yeah." He says taking the gun and cocking it.

"Time to grow up." Shane says walking up to the rest of them. "You already got yours?" He asks Andrea.

"Yeah. Where's Dale?" Andrea asks him.

"He's on his way." He says handing T-Dog a gun.

"Thought we couldn't carry." T-Dog says.

"We can and we have to. Look, it was one thing sitting around here picking daisies when we thought this place was supposed to be safe .But now we know it ain't."

"So what? Your just gonna storm in there and turn this place into Armageddon?" I ask.

"If I have to too protect what's mine then yes!" he walks up to Glenn. "How about you, man? You gonna protect yours?" Glenn looks at Maggie but then takes the gun. "That's it. Can you shoot?" Shane asks Maggie.

"Can you stop?" Maggie snaps. "You do this, you hand out these guns, and my dad will make you leave tonight."

"We have to stay, Shane." Carl says from the porch. I just notice that he's up there with Lori, Beth and Patricia.

"What is this?" Lori says walking up.

"We ain't going anywhere, okay? Now look, Hershel, he's just got to understand. Okay? He... Well, he's gonna have to. Now we need to find Sophia. Am I right? Huh?" he walks up to Carl and kneels down offering him a gun. "Now I want you to take this. You take it, Carl, and you keep your mother safe. You do whatever it takes. You know how. Go on, take the gun and-

"Enough!" I grab the gun out of his hands before Carl could react. "Leave him out of this." I growl at him.

"If you're not going to help you stay out of it!"

"Back off Shane." Lori said furious. "Rick said no guns. This is not your call. This is not your decision to make."

"Oh shit." T-Dog says and we turn to see what he's talking about. Coming out of the woods was Rick and Hershel dragging two walkers on poles and Jimmy in front of them clapping his hands like he's trying to call a dog over.

"What the fuck?" Is that how they've been gathering them?

"What is that?" Shane says before running towards them with us following him. "What is that?"

"Shane wait!"

"Stop!"

"Shane!" We call after him but he doesn't listen.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Shane, just back off." Rick says trying to keep control of his walker.

"Why do your people have guns?" Hershel shouts trying to keep control over his walker.

"Are you kidding me?" Shane shouts. "You see? You see what they're holding onto?"

"I see who I'm holding onto." Hershel says.

"No, man, you don't."

"Shane, just let us do this and then we can talk."

"What you want to talk about, Rick? These things ain't sick. They're not people. They're dead. Ain't gonna feel nothing for them 'cause all they do, they kill! These things right here, they're the things that killed Amy. They killed Otis. They're gonna kill all of us."

"Shane, shut up!" Rick shouts, I look around and see Daryl pointing his gun at the walkers and the others looking upset over what Shane just said. Especially Andrea, Beth and Patricia.

"Hey, Hershel man, let me ask you something. Could a living breathing person, could they walk away from this?" He pulls out his gun and shouts him the female walker three times in the chest.

**_Bang. Bang. Bang._**

Maggie, Beth and Patricia let out shrill shrieks but the walker doesn't fall.

"No! Stop it!" Rick shouts.

"That's three rounds in the chest. Could someone who's alive, could they just take that?!Why is it still coming?"

**_Bang. Bang._**

"Cut it out!" I shout at him.

"That's its heart, its lungs. Why is it still coming?"

**_Bang. Bang._**

"Shane, enough."

"Yeah, you're right, man. That is enough." He walks up to the walker and points his gun at his head.

**_Bang_.** The walker falls still to the ground and Hershel falls to his knees devastated. Shane walks towards the Barn and stops halfway there.

"Enough risking our lives for a little girl who's gone!" He shouts at us. "Enough living next to a barn full of things that are trying to kill us. Enough. Rick, it ain't like it was before! Now if y'all want to live, if you want to survive, you got to fight for it! I'm talking about fighting right here, right now." He runs towards the barn.

"No!" I shout and try to run after him but Daryl blocks me off and T-Dog grabs my arm to hold me back. "Let go! He's fucking crazy! We have to stop him."

"Take the snare pole. Hershel, take the snare pole." Rick shouts but Hershel seems almost comatose. "Hershel, listen to me, man, please. Take it now. Hershel! Take it!" Shane starts attacking the barn door with a pick ax.

"No, Shane. Do not do this, brother."

"Wait!" Someone shouts.

"Don't do it!" Glenn shouts.

"This is suicide!" I shout.

"Rick!" Lori shouts.

"Please!" But our attempts are futile as Shane takes off the board of wood and throws it to the side opening the doors.

"Come on. Come on, we're out here." He yells at them banging on the doors before backing away.

"This is not the way! Please!"

But it's no use. The growling grew louder as the doors were pushed open and a walker in overalls stepped out leading the rest of them. Their skin was more decayed looking than any of the other walkers I'd seen and most of them had large gashes on their faces covered in dark dried up blood. Andrea, T-Dog and Daryl ran up and started shooting at them. I grip the gun in my hand and look back at the horrified faces behind me.

"I'm sorry." I say to them before running up to join the others.

I grip my gun with both hands, aim and fire at any walker that came in my direction. After what sounded like a hundred gunshots went off the barn was finally empty. I tried to catch my breath as I lowered the gun and looked at all the bodies on the ground. There must have been about twenty of them. I hear sobs and turn around to see Beth crying in Jimmy's arms, Maggie and Patricia looking heartbroken and Hershel still on his knees in shock. But the crying is interrupted when a soft growl is heard from the barn. I turn around and raise my gun ready to shoot whatever was left but what came out of the barn nearly stopped my heart. It was smaller than the rest. White sneakers, cargo capris, dirty blue shirt with a rainbow on it and short dark blonde hair. It flinches from the sunlight but when it shows its face I let out a cry of shock, it was Sophia.

"No… no no no no no." I mutter. It can't be. It can't be.

"Sophia? Sophia!" I hear Carol say from behind me and hear running. I look to my side to see Daryl catch Carol before she could reach her. "Oh no. Sophia. Sophia. No."

She looks around and then moves forward. Walking with a lurch like she has something heavy on her back, growling like a wild animal. I feel warm tears trickle down my face and my stomach feels like its being stabbed over and over again.

"No." I whisper to myself. "You can't… you can't." I keep trying to convince myself it wasn't her. That this animalistic lifeless shell wasn't sweet little Sophia. She wasn't in there, she didn't deserve this.

My gun is still pointed at her. My hand is shaking and I feel my finger move to pull the trigger, wanting to put her out of her misery.

"Sophia." I hear Carol say from my side.

"_You're mom and everyone here will protect you." I hear my voice in my head, the words that I said long ago the day before we left camp. _

"_You too?" I hear her sweet innocent voice but it's not coming out of the body in front of me. The body that is getting closer to me by the second._

"_Protect me." _

"_Protect me." _

"_Protect me Natalie." She walks past the bodies, growling and determined to get to us._

"_Help me!" _

"_Natalie help!" She looks at me, her cloudy white eyes pierce into mine. _

"_I can't!" _I shout dropping the gun and covering my ears.I can't do it. I can't pull the trigger. I see someone pass me and I look up to see Rick standing in front of us. Holding up his gun towards Sophia as she continues to walk towards him.

"_Protect me."_

**_Bang!…_**

* * *

**To be continued. This one pained me but I felt it had to be done. Because as sad as it as no one is safe anymore in that situation and it is an important part of the story. Next time we deal with the fallout and say goodbye to Sophia. **

**If you want you are more than welcome to leave a comment on what you thought of this chapter. Favorite moments, lines that spoke to you and/or your overall feelings or opinions on the chapter as a whole. If you don't feel comfortable leaving a review feel to PM me and I'll respond if you want me to. All comments are welcome and if you enjoyed it please favorite or follow if you haven't already.**


	31. Goodbye (AKA Nebraska)

**Okay, I don't remember if I mentioned this and I feel to lazy to check, but this story has been favorite over 100 times! Seriously, I want to thank you all so much. It keeps me going and helps me feel more confident in this story. Every favorite, follower and comment brings me so much joy. **

**As for this chapter... well... it's a little heavier than the others. Honestly I'm afraid I made it too heavy. if I put too much into it please let me know so I can improve.**

**Reviews:**

**LadyCaysie: Aw! I feel bad that I made you cry yet also happy that I was able to make it really sad (is that sadistic of me?). That was really emotional for me to write and I think I may have been crying too. I also got emotional for this one.**

** Ladytitan5(cool name!): Glad you're enjoying it! Ah yes, how Daryl and Nat come out... well that's a journey where I hope everyone will like the outcome.**

**Hannah-Rampage (I know you replied to ch.7 but if you get this far, hi!): Glad you like the story. And hope is definitely one of the big themes of this story just like it is on the actual show.**

* * *

**_Bang!_**

The sight that unraveled before my eyes was too horrifying to describe. It happened so fast but my mind just kept replaying it over and over again. The sound of the shot and her head flailing from the impact. The moment she fell to the ground I snapped. My mouth fell open to let out strangled scream, but I barely heard it because my ears were still ringing from the gun shot. I couldn't hear anything, couldn't feel anything, and then my body just gave out. The ground got closer and closer and then I stopped moving. My vision blurred and I kept fading in and out of reality.

"Nat!" I hear someone call out as I lie on the ground sobbing.

I flash back forth between here and the past. Like someone hitting the rewind button I see a montage of my past, all of the horrible memories that are like permanent scars. Sophia leaves the barn, Maggie gets attacked, Daryl gets shot, Carl gets shot, the herd attack, the CDC explosion, Jim dying, the attack on the camp, the bombing of Atlanta, and then all of the bad memories of my time in the foster system went by until I ended up back at the night I was shot. Everything that brought me to this point flashed before my eyes. So much loss, so much pain, why? Why do I have to witness so much pain?

"Come on. I got you." I didn't even have to look up to know who it was.

The memories disappear and I'm looking at the barn the again. My vision is slightly tilted though, someone must be trying to prop up my limp body. Strong arms wrap around me and they're kneeling on the ground, pulling me into their lap. I sit there crying, my eyes still locked on the carnage before me. Beth walks up to the bodies, Rick tries to stop her, but she pushes past him walking up to a walker woman and pushing the body on top of her off. It must have been her mother. Visions flood my mind of my own mother. Dancing in the kitchen to the radio, being held tightly in her arms anytime I was hurt, her mental breakdown after my dad died, and then I saw her body. Lying still on the kitchen floor with a bullet in her head and right beside her.

A scream broke out and my mother disappeared. Beth was struggling against her mother, and everyone else ran up to help her. The gunshot wounds on her face remind me of my own mother.

"Come on!"

"Pull her away, pull her away!"

I let out another cry at the scene and turn my head away, burying it in the broad chest of whoever was holding me. They tensed before wrapping their left arm tighter around my waist and cradled my head closer to them. For a long time we just stayed like that, the warmth of their body slightly comforted me and made the pain slightly better.

"Did she faint?" I heard a woman's voice from above me. I can't tell if it's Lori or Andrea though.

"She's traumatized." A man said. "We need to get her away from here."

I feel myself being lifted and carried away. I look over their shoulder and watch the barn get smaller and smaller until we were back at the camp. Soon I was carried up the steps and into the RV. I was placed gently on the bed, laying on my side. Tilting my head slightly I finally catch of glimpse of Daryl. He's looming over me, distraught, but also protective. I want to speak to him. To tell him not to look at me, that I didn't want him to see me like this but I can't. I'm afraid that if I try to speak I'll come undone.

So I just laid there for the longest time. People would come in and out of the RV, I never looked up to see who they were but I did hear something about a funeral. Someone asked Daryl if he would go look for Carol. He seemed hesitant to leave me, but I could tell that he was concerned about her. When he left I closed my eyes only to enter a world possibly more horrifying than this one. It's still the farm, but it's much more menacing. The sky is a sickly blood red and the trees and grass are either dead or on fire. I stand in front of the barn. The doors open and the walkers are walking out, only this time I recognize all of the faces. My family, old friends, people from the camp, Amy, Jim, Jacqui, Sophia even Ed and Merle showed up with parts missing from their bodies. I can't escape from them, no matter where I go they always follow me.

I wake up with a start when I hear a knock and look around to see I'm back in the RV. I see Carol's back, she's sitting at the table looking out the window in a daze. I get off the bed and move up ahead to see Daryl sitting on top of the counter holding a rifle and Lori standing by the RV door.

"They're ready. Come on." She says

"Why?" Carol asks.

"'Cause that's your little girl." Daryl says.

"That's not my little girl. That's some other… thing. My Sophia was alone in the woods. All this time I thought... She didn't cry herself to sleep. She didn't go hungry. She didn't try to find her way back. Sophia died a long time ago."

Lori looked upset and walked out of the RV. Daryl was sitting there shaking like he was ready to blow his lid off. I'm about to ask him if he's alright, but he gets up and leaves the RV. Now it's just me and Carol. I take the seat in front of her, sitting down and collecting my thoughts before I try talking to her.

"You can go." She says while staring out the window. "You don't have to stay with me, especially if you think I'm horrible because of what I said."

"You're not horrible."

"You saw how they reacted. They think I'm a terrible mother, and they're right."

"Don't say that. You loved her so much."

"It wasn't enough. The one person I had left, the one person I was supposed to protect, she's gone. How can I live with that? How can I go on?" I get up quickly and go over to her.

"Sophia would want you to go on. It's going to be hard and it won't be easy. but you can't give up now."

"How? My little girl is gone, she must hate me for abandoning her."

"No. She could never hate you."

"You say that now, but could you really have forgiven your mother for failing to protect you."

"I- I did." I move the collar of my shirt and show her my scar. "Someone broke into my house as a child, attacked us and when it looked like he might have killed me she blamed herself for what happened."

"Because sh-she couldn't protect you?" Carol stuttered through tears.

"Not just that." I feel sick as I think of the night, but I force myself to remember. "Because h- he was her lover. After my dad died, she had a hole in her heart that couldn't be fixed. My sister and I tried, but my mother thought she needed a man in her life. She was desperate and he took advantage of it. He was obsessive, he thought of her as a possession and resented me and my sister. To him we were reminders of her first love, the one who he'd never live up to. So he tried to convince her to dump us with our grandparents and run off with him but she wouldn't."

I started to cry from the confession. This was the first time I ever admitted it out loud to anyone, I couldn't even admit it to myself. For even though I had every right to blame him I would still blame myself. Because I got live while she didn't, my sister lost her mother because of me. I feel something, a warm sensation on my hand and I realize Carol's holding it. I look up and see that's she's staring at me with tears in her eyes.

"Why? Why are you sharing this with me?"

"B-because even though I've forgiven her I can't forgive myself. I never wanted her to lose her life over me. Just like I know Sophia wouldn't want you to give up because of her." I stand up and head to the door.

"I understand if you're not ready to say goodbye yet, I don't want to either. But I want you to know that when you are I'll be by your side if you want me to."

I wait a couple seconds for her to respond, but she doesn't. With a heavy heart, I leave the trailer to give her space and go say goodbye to a dear friend.

* * *

I just arrived in time just to see them put the bodies in the graves. Hearing me approach they stopped what they were doing and turned their heads towards me. I could see the sympathy in their eyes and some confusion. They were probably wondering where Carol was.

"She's not coming." I say. "She's not ready to say goodbye."

I walk up to the graves and take my place with the others. After taking in my words, we went on with the funeral. Each of us shoveled dirt into the graves before handing the shovel to the next person. Before long they were fully buried and Patricia said the prayer in Hershel's place.

"_Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;  
where there is hatred, let me sow love;  
where there is injury, pardon;  
where there is doubt, faith;  
where there is despair, hope;  
where there is darkness, light;  
and where there is sadness, joy.  
O Divine Master,  
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;  
to be understood, as to understand;  
to be loved, as to love;  
for it is in giving that we receive,  
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,  
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.  
Amen_"

Everyone had their heads bowed for a moment of silence. All you could hear was the birds chirping, the bugs humming and the farm animals in the distance. It was astonishing how peaceful it all sounded now when it's only been a couple of hours since the shooting at the barn. Hours since we found her. After a couple of minutes we lift up our heads and people start leaving but I don't move.

"Natalie?" Dale asks me.

"I- I just want to say goodbye without everyone around."

"Are you sure? You don't have to do this alone."

"Thank you but I'd feel better if I did this alone. I can't say what I'd want to in front of other people."

He still looks uncertain, but he leaves me alone. I walk slowly up to Sophia's grave and kneel in front of the stone placed at the end of it. I cross my arms to try to comfort myself as my body starts to shake.

"Sophia, I'm sorry." I say through tears. "I'm so sorry." I cry harder feeling the sobs shake my whole body.

"All you wanted was to be protected. To never be hurt again after all you have been through with your asshole of a father." I wipe some tears away. "And you deserved to be protected, you and your mother deserved a second chance. I wanted to help you get it. I wanted to promise to protect you, but I couldn't because I felt guilty. I felt guilty because I already broke that promise to my sister. At the beginning of this I said I would do anything to find her, but as time went by I started to stop trying as hard; I started to focus on taking care of myself and felt like I found a place here with the group. This is going to sound crazy, but I was actually happier here than I ever was before and I hated myself for feeling that way." Sophia's grave now had several damp circles from my tears.

"When you disappeared, I snapped. I was determined to find you even if it killed me because I couldn't lose you too. And… I think a part of me wanted to believe that if it was possible to find you it'd be possible to find Reese. That I wasn't fooling myself by saying it's possible she's safe. But when you came out of the barn…" I gagged and gripped the grass really tight trying not to throw up.

A sudden gust of wind blew my hair into my face, I lift my head up to brush it behind my ears only to see Daryl few feet away from me. I don't know how much he's heard, but he looks upset, almost angry as he turns around and walks away. I get up and dust off the dirt on my jeans before I go off after him towards the camp. His tent is disassembled and he's packing some stuff away in his bag.

"How much did you hear?" I ask him.

"Enough."

"So why are you mad?"

"Mad? You wanna know why I'm mad?" he turns around to face me. "I'm mad because we spent the last couple days looking for a girl who's been dead the whole time! I feel like an idiot giving you and her mama hope that we'd find her and getting shot twice only to find out she's been dead the whole time!"

"So you're leaving? Please don't, I know that it's easier to run away from your feelings-"

"Who said I'm running away from my feelings?" he shouts at me. "Your one to talk! Acting all high and mighty saying you're going to find your sister when you admitted you're happier without her! Looking for a little girl that's not your problem because you feel guilty! Don't you dare act like your better than me!"

"You know what your right! I'm just as fucked up as anyone else, I can admit that because I've heard it over and over again how broken I am. I'm cynical, I'm a bitch, commitment phobic, stubborn, and a bunch of other things I don't give a fuck about! And yes, life with my sister wasn't always easy. She rarely visited me when I was in foster care, I've had to pull her drunken ass out of multiple bars, comforted her during her mental breakdowns because the loss of our family was too much for her to handle, broke up with and sometimes beat up her ex-boyfriends, and there have been multiple times where it felt like she would abandon me for some douchebag in a trucker hat. She wasn't the perfect sister, but that doesn't change the fact that I love her, she loved me, and no matter how easy it is just to take care of myself there will always be this hole in my heart from not being with her."

"But you're giving up?"

"I'm accepting reality. It's likely she's dead and I have to accept it and focus on becoming a better person to survive."

"You think this makes people better? It's brings out the worst in everyone!"

"Not you."

He gives me a questioning look before going back to pack his things.

"You might not want to admit it, but you've changed. You used to never interact with anyone other than your brother and sometimes me but now you're more active in group discussions, you've helped rescue Glenn and T-Dog, you've done more for Sophia than anyone and have tried to comfort Carol."

"What's your point?" He shouts at me as he ties his things onto his motorcycle.

"My point is that whoever you think you are is wrong. Whatever happened to you that shaped you in some way, the demons you've had to battle, they're in the past."

"You don't know anything!"

"Haven't you ever heard that broken people are drawn to each other? Like magnets, there's a force that brings us together no matter how hard you try to fight it."

"Stop acting like you know me! You don't know a damn thing about my past, my brother, my father anything about me!"

"I never said I did. I don't know about your past or your father because you don't confide in me or anyone. I only know some things about you. I know you're an excellent tracker, hotheaded, and crass. I also know once you set your mind on something, there's nothing that can stop you, you smarter than everyone gives you credit for, and I know that you have your scars-"He glares at me. "But that's okay, I do too." I pull the collar of my shirt down showing him where I was shot. His eyes softened a bit at the sight. "Everyone has scars, some are more visible than others. but they don't define us. They're more like reminders of where we've been." I remove my hand from my shirt and it bounces back into it place. "If you don't want to share your past or open up with anyone that's okay, I've been there more times than I can count. But please, don't go."

"…I'm not."

"But-"

"I'm moving my stuff up to the old mill house. I need to get away from everybody."

"And you didn't think to lead with that?" I ask irritably. "You mother-"he grabs my wrists when I try to push him, resulting in him drawing me closer. He stares down at me with his squinty eyes that would normally be creepy, but are somehow incredibly hot in a way only Daryl could pull off. It's both unnerving yet incredibly exhilarating to me and I hate that he makes me feel so vulnerable.

"You're right." He says. "It's easier thinking bout myself. I'm done doing their dirty work while they sit around twiddling their fingers waiting for me to die, I'm done getting involved in things that aren't my problem and I'm done looking for people." He lets go and gets on his bike.

"Daryl-"

"Leave me be." He interrupts me as he starts his bike.

I watch him as he takes off, feeling slightly pissed about how he treated me. I thought about going after him, but realized that it would do no good. I already tried talking to him and I think some of it may have helped him, but now Daryl just needs to let his anger simmer. I walk to the house and think about our conversation. From what I gathered finding Sophia meant a lot more to him than he originally let on. It seems like he too also feels guilty about not looking for his brother, which makes sense for why he blew up at me about Reese. There was also an understanding look on his face when I talked about how she wasn't the easiest person to get along with. I can only imagine what it was probably like to grow up with Merle as a brother. Maybe that's why he was mad at me, because even though he'd never admit it, he feels better without his blood.

"Beth!"

I break out of my thoughts and run into the house. Throwing the door open I run into the kitchen to see Glenn and Maggie kneeling by an unconscious Beth.

* * *

_Hours later..._

"She needs help soon." Maggie said sitting by Beth's side on her bed.

Like me Beth fell into shock over what she'd witness today, only she wasn't breaking out of it anytime soon. Rick and Glenn left a while ago to go find Hershel who most likely went to the bar to fall off the wagon. I was hoping they would be back by now, but Beth's fever was rising.

"Glenn and Rick will be back soon with you dad." I say to her. "There good guys."

"I know they are and I do trust them, it's just-"

"She's your sister. You feel this need to do everything you can to take care of her."

"I do. How'd you know?"

"I felt that way about my sister."

"Felt? She's-" She stops herself before she could say the word.

"Gone… She's gone."

"I'm so sorry. I didn't know, god I feel like a terrible friend. I've been talking to you about my problems with Glenn and this whole time I never asked about you."

"Don't beat yourself up. I don't really talk about my past that much with anyone really."

"What was she like?" Maggie asks.

"She was-"I stop to laug awkwardly "she was a lot of things. She was a wild child, acted before she thought, not afraid to say what was on her mind, boy crazy." Maggie laughs at that. "Yeah, she got in a lot of trouble because of that. I usually had to be her Jiminy Cricket and help her out of a lot of situations. But she was also fiercely loyal, had a huge heart, overprotective of me like I was with her. She was my best friend, sometimes my worst nightmare and all I had left. But then when everything started she was just gone. I don't know if she's alive or not, but I'd give anything to hear her voice again."

"I know what you mean." She says with tears in her eyes. "Your relationship reminds me of Beth's and mine. I was a handful growing up. Always rebelling against everything and anything. Gave my dad and step-mom a hard time, Beth was their good girl. Always sweet, happy, and singing. It did get annoying at times being sisters with a golden child, but she always looked up to me. But now I'd do anything to hear her voice again."

I look down at Beth lying in the bed. Her eyes are open, but they're not moving. She looks almost like a statue with her pale skin. I never really talked to her or paid much attention to her, but I could tell she was a sweet girl. A little on the shy side and coddled by her family. She was obviously loved very much by everyone here. The love and fear in Maggie's eyes is heartbreaking.

"Maggie, I need to borrow a horse."

"What?"

"I'm going to go into town to see if they need help. A car would attract more attention than I want and walking will take too long."

"Can you take that Daryl guy? I'd go with you but-"

"Daryl's not up to tracking down people after what happened and Beth needs you."

"Well can you ask the others? You can't go out there alone."

"Maggie I have to. Shane would go ballistic if he found out and try to stop me. We've already lost too many people, we can't lose anymore." I get up and make my way to the door.

"Wait! Get the baseball bat in my room for protection and go out the back door. Be careful."

"Thank you. I'll do my best."

Following her instructions I grab the baseball bat from behind her bedroom door and sneak out of the house. I run to the barn, put a saddle and bridle on Murphy and lead him out of the barn. After a lot effort I managed to pull myself onto the horse and Murphy and I galloped off towards the town. Luckily no one was around to stop me so I managed to make it off the farm without anyone noticing. I'm trotting down the road remembering the path we took last time to get to the pharmacy when I notice something in the road, it looks like Carol's car.

"Whoa!" I stop Murphy and get off to approach the car.

The driver's door is open and a walker is banging on the passenger door. There's no sign of Rick or Glenn though, which is both a relief and upsetting. I walk up to the car and let out a whistle to get the walker's attention. It looks up at me and lets out a loud growl as I goes around the front of the car to get to me.

"Batter up."

I swing the bat at its head so hard that the walker head does a one-eight as it falls to the ground. I slam the bat down a couple more times just to make sure there'll be no surprise attacks as I look at the car. When I'm certain he's down for the count I peer inside the car to see a backpack with it's contents spilled out and a photo taped to the dashboard. In the picture is a man with glasses standing happily two little girls at his side in front of the Niagara Falls. This wasn't Carol's car, so Rick and Glenn aren't here. Something nudges my shoulder and I turn around to attack only to scare Murphy.

"Whoa! It's okay it's okay." I say to calm him down. "You scared me." I dropped the bat to grab his bridle to calm him down, rubbing his forehead and whispering calming things.

"Good boy. C'mon, let's go find Rick."

"You're not going anywhere bitch."

"Huh?"

_**Bam!**_

* * *

**To be continued! Sorry for the cliff hanger, please don't hurt me! It wasn't supposed to be but then the idea hit me and I had to do it!**


	32. Chapter 32 preview

**Okay sorry about the wait (****especially since it was a major cliffhanger****.) I feel terrible about making you wait so long, especially since the last update gave me the most reviews in the shortest amount of time. I'm almost done, just need to finish the last quarter and do a spelling and grammar check but I thought I'd give you a little preview of what's to come. Some random lines in no particular order from the next chapter that should hopefully get you guys pumped for it. BE WARNED!: THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL HAVE A TRIGGER WARNING!**

* * *

_"You're going to pay for what you've done!" he shouts at me._

_"Let go!" I kick at him but he doesn't let go._

_"Let's see how you like being fucked with!"_

* * *

_"That's not her." He says_

_"What are you talking about?"_

_"That's not our girl, but that doesn't mean we can't have a little fun with her."_

* * *

_Carol had a feeling that something was off. The last time she saw Natalie she was in the bedroom with Beth and Maggie. That was hours ago though, she didn't even show up to dinner because according to Maggie the girls agreed to take turns watching over Beth._

* * *

_Daryl leapt in front of the horse and grabbed the reins. Pulling on them tightly and shouting commands he was able to stop it. He recognized the horse as one of Hershel's. Feeling a warm and sticky sensation on his palm Daryl opened it and saw that his hand was now stained with scarlet blood._

_"She had you cover for her didn't she?"_

* * *

_"Someone gonna come looking for you?" he runs his other down my side, his jagged nails sliding down my body sickens me. "A friend, family, maybe a possessive lover?"_

* * *

_Oh god, how the fuck am I going to get out of this?_

* * *

**Until next time! I love you all so much and I will respond to each comment individually next time but I just want to say that you guys have really truly touched my heart this time. Especially because I'm debating about going back to school to get my bachelors degree and maybe try to figure out a plan so that I could possibly make a career out of writing. (whether it's for journalism, TV is what I hope to do one day, books or anything that I'd feel happy to contribute to). It won't be able and it's very scary to think of but I really want to try to fulfill my dream someday and if I fail at least I can say I did what I could. **


	33. Triggerfinger

**Serious warning! There is some dark, brutal and very disturbing materials coming up so if you anyone is offended or upset by it I am very sorry. **

* * *

**Trigger Finger **

_Previously:_

_"You're right." He says. "It's easier thinking bout myself. I'm done doing their dirty work while they sit around twiddling their fingers waiting for me to die, I'm done getting involved in things that aren't my problem and I'm done looking for people." He lets go and gets on his bike._

_"Daryl-"_

_"Leave me be." He interrupts me as he starts his bike._

_Maggie, I need to borrow a horse."_

_"What?"_

_"I'm going to go into town to see if they need help. A car would attract more attention than I want and walking will take too long."_

_"Good boy. C'mon, lets go find Rick."_

_"You're not going anywhere bitch."_

_"Huh?"_

_Bam!_

* * *

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!"

The sound of someone falling and horse hooves running away fills my ears as I lay on the street. My head is throbbing and all I see are black spots as I push myself up. Vaguely I see a heavyset man lying curled up on the street holding his stomach, Murphy must have attacked him. In a panic. I look around for my bat to see it a couple of feet away from me. My legs feel like jelly though so I have to drag myself towards it. I'm just about to reach it when I feel something clamp onto my ankle.

"Ah!"

"You're going to pay for what you've done!" he shouts at me.

"Let go!" I kick at him but he doesn't let go.

"Let's see how you like being fucked with!"

Ignoring his babbling I reach as far as I could for the bat. My fingers graze the handle and I manage to move it closer to me. Grasping it firmly I swing it as hard as I could at his head. It breaks in half from the impact and he lets go of my ankle to grab his face. Getting up as fast as I could I bolt into the woods, hoping to lose him. I stumble over branches and push myself off of the trees as I try to run despite not being able to see straight.

"Come out bitch!"

"Where'd she go?"

Crap! There's more of them? As I run I see a walker in front of me and pivot to run in the other direction. I look down at what's left of bat and see that it has some very sharp, jagged points at the end of it. I leap at it, jabbing it in its eye socket and pull out killing it as I run away. But where am I running to? I can't risk leading these guys back to the farm, the safest bet is to try to lose them as I head towards town. At least then I can hide in the buildings while trying to find Rick and Glenn.

"Gotch ya thief." Someone says tackling me and throwing me to the ground. I let out a yelp as he ties my wrists together.

"Let go! You got the wrong person!" I shout as I struggle against him.

"What do you think I'm stupid? This tat is like a fucking brand." He says while holding my wrist.

"Scott? Where are you?"

"Over here! Got the dirty skank!" he digs his kneecap into my back and I howl out in pain.

I turn my head and see another guy approach us. He looks haggard and dangerous with his face all black and blue. He had light shaggy hair, crazy eyes and four scars running from under his right eye down to his chin.

"That's not her." He says

"What are you talking about?"

"That's not our girl, but that doesn't mean we can't have a little fun with her." The other guys snicker at that and I try wiggle free only to be hit.

"Now now girly, gotta save your strength, you're gonna go meet the rest of us and boy do they like them feisty."

Oh god, how the fuck am I going to get out of this?

* * *

_**At the farm **_

It turns out Natalie wasn't the only one who snuck out to follow Rick and Glenn, everyone else noticed that Lori was nowhere to be found. They searched the farm for her and Carol found out from Daryl that Lori asked him to go into town for her. He refused however and told her to go look for them herself. Shane went to go look for her and the others went back in the house. Maggie was still by Beth's bedside when the door opened, it was Carol.

"Sorry, I thought Natalie was in here with you. I wanted to make sure she had dinner since she missed it."

"It's fine." Maggie said. "After I came back to watch Beth she said she was going to see Daryl. Probably brought him dinner."

"Huh, I must have missed her." Carol said as she closed the door.

Carol had a feeling that something was off. The last time she saw Natalie she was in the bedroom with Beth and Maggie. That was hours ago though, and she didn't even show up to dinner because according to Maggie the girls agreed to take turns watching over Beth. It was strange but Carol decided to take Maggie's word for it.

Still feeling unhinged with how she left things with Daryl she decided to go see him. The idea of him being out there by himself upset her. Over the past couple of days she had grown fond of Daryl. She admired his perseverance and found comfort in the gestures he did when she was upset. He wasn't the man she thought he was, wasn't the man anybody thought he was.

Carol reached the camp only to find it empty. Curiosity took over her and she started to snoop around. She walked over to the clothesline that had squirrels hanging from it and stood in front of it. She gazed at the walker ear necklace hanging on it. It was hard to tell what she was thinking of but the look on her face showed that she was far away. She didn't even hear Daryl's footsteps as he approached her.

"What are you doing?" he asks startling her.

"Keeping an eye on you."

"Ain't you a peach?"

"I'm not gonna let you pull away. You've earned your place."

"If you spent half your time minding your daughter's business instead of sticking your nose in everybody else's, she'd still be alive!"

"Go ahead."

"Go ahead and what? I mean just go! I don't want you here! You're a real piece of work, lady. What, are you gonna make this about my daddy or some crap like that? Pfft! Man, you know Jack. You're afraid. You're afraid 'cause you're all alone. You got no husband, no daughter. You don't know what to do with yourself. You ain't my problem! Sophia wasn't mine! All you had to do was keep an eye on her!"

She flinches as he gets closer but he doesn't hit her like she expected him too. He just glares at her before turning his back on her.

"You want me to go?" she says. "Fine, just let Natalie know I was looking for her."

"What? You expecting her to come by?"

"I thought she did. Maggie said she came to see you."

He turned around and Carol could see the confusion in his eyes. Her heart filled with dread as she realized what's going on.

"You don't think-"

"Fuck!" Daryl swore as he went to get his crossbow and put on his coat.

"Wait. Shane went off looking for Lori, maybe Natalie went with her. He'll f-"

A loud yell interrupted Carol. Both of them looked towards the source to see a large horse running towards them. Pushing Carol out of the way Daryl leapt in front of the horse and grabbed the reins. Pulling on them tightly and shouting commands he was able to stop it. He recognized the horse as one of Hershel's. Feeling a warm and sticky sensation on his palm Daryl opened it and saw that his hand was now stained with scarlet blood.

"Oh my god!" Carol gasped.

"Take it back."

He handed the reins to Carol and got on his bike. Revving it up, he drove off to the path that led into town. Carol watched still holding onto the horse until he was no longer in sight before taking the horse back to the barn. Once she did, she went back to the house to see Maggie.

"She had you cover for her didn't she?" Carol asked her.

"You went and saw Daryl didn't you?" Maggie replied not looking at Carol.

"I did. Then the horse she took came charging towards us… wi- without her." Carol sobbed. Maggie's head bolted up and looked at Carol with wide eyes.

"No…" She said guiltily. "You don't think-"

"I don't know. She's a strong girl, always found a way to get out of trouble. Daryl took his bike and went to find her."

"I thought he said he was done with finding people?"

"He did. But Natalie's different for him."

"Different? Do you mean-" Carol nodded her head.

"Yes. I don't think they really know it themselves yet, especially Daryl. But there was always something special between them. The way they're more comfortable around each other than anyone else, bantering like an old married couple, the way he looks at her when she's not looking, the admiration in her eyes when she talks about him, and how they're both very protective of each other. I wasn't sure what to think of it when I first noticed it. I think I was afraid he was like my late husband, that he was just going to hurt her if she eventually fell hard for him."

"But you don't think that anymore?"

"No. I've seen the good in him that Natalie always saw, the reason why she's falling in love with him. And after seeing his reaction to finding out she was missing, seeing him tear off into the night to look for her, I know that he can't lose her."

"Because he loves her?" Maggie asked, Carol nodded.

"Because he loves her."

* * *

"Come on bitch talk!"

I flinch as a fist makes contact with my face. I don't know how much more I can take. I thought they were just going to have their way with me right then and there but they had other ideas. They took me back to their makeshift camp for the night where three other guys were and told them what happened. One of the three other guys pointed out how I look much cleaner than them so I must have shelter and like the other girl they brought back I'm probably not alone out here. So they bound my legs together and threw me against a tree where they began to interrogate me, only I'm pretty sure what they're doing now classifies more as torture.

"That one felt softer than the others." I spit out glaring at crazy eyes. "What's wrong? If you don't have enough stamina for this what makes you think you'll be able to get it up long enough to-"he punches me again interrupting me.

"This is pointless Richie!" one of the others said, a dark skinned man. "Let's just get this over with and go find the others."

"If she really isn't alone then her group is probably close by Willie." Richie replied. "What if they ambush Dave, Tony, Randal, Nate and your brother Sean? Could you forgive yourself then?"

"Well if you keep beating her she won't be alive to tell us!"

"Um, I think he's right." A meek looking guy with cracked glasses said. "She looks like she's going to pass out."

"Fine Weasel."

"Wesley."

"Whatever. We'll let her get her fight back and have our fun with her when the others get back."

They go back to the fire and sit around passing a flask. I try to tune them out and focus on not letting out grunts of pain. My jaw feels like it's filled with rocks and the rope around my wrists feels more like barbed wire. But as much as it hurts now I need to find a way to get out of this. I need to warn the others that we're not alone out here. If I could just get my knife out of my boot without them noticing I might be able to cut the rope on my legs and make a run for it, as long as I'm faster than their rifles. I subtly inch my legs up every few seconds their not looking my way.

"They should be back by now." Willie said.

"Relax." A nameless one said. "Maybe they found a place for us and the others to stay."

"I'm going to go look for them." He gets up, grabs some stuff and leaves.

"Well you better bring them back soon!" Richie calls after them. "She looks so tempting right now I don't think I can hold out much longer."

"Yeah well I think Dave will fight for first dibs." Scott said. She's got a northern accent on her. Philly boy probably feels homesick."

"Huh, think your right. Yo doll face, where ya from?" I give him my best dirty look and don't answer. "Not real friendly are you?"

"Maybe she really is alone. Bitch seems like too much of a handful to keep around."

"I don't know Quint. Hard to believe a tiny little thing lasted this long alone." Scott said.

"Well if she is alone that probably explains her attitude." Richie said. "Bitch probably hasn't had a man for so long she needs a good fuck."

I gag at the thought and go back to reaching for my knife. I'm almost there when I hear someone walk up to me. I look up to see Wesley Potter offering me water. I tilt my head away from him, not wanting to take anything from these sick bastards.

"It's okay." I look at him and see that he's not looking at me but down at my hand. It's gripping the knife but he's not doing anything to stop me. If anything there's sympathy in his eyes. Testing it I pull it out and adjust it so I can cut my ropes. He looks towards the group worriedly but doesn't stop me.

"We're… we're not all bad. Just been through a lot of stuff."

"We've all been through stuff." I whisper back.

"Yeah but… you wouldn't understand." Glaring I turn to look at him while cutting the rope slowly.

"I wouldn't understand?" I growled. "I killed so many walkers that I lost count of how many a long time ago, I've had nightmares that even Stephen King would probably piss himself if he had them, I saw a little girl that I loved like a sister turn into one of them only to watch her get a bullet in her skull and buried, I've been beaten, tied up, and threatened to be raped by a bunch of scum bags. And that only sums up today, so don't you dare tell me I wouldn't understand." He looks horrified at what I've said, he keeps staring at me with a flabbergasted look on his face.

"Well then, girly's not alone after all." I look up to see the other guys staring at us. "Guess Weasel's gentlemanly charm actually works sometime."

"Um, I was just-"

"We'll deal with you later." Richie says. "So girly you ready to answer some questions?"

"I already did."

"We want the truth." Scott says. "Where are the rest of your people? Where's the farm you got the horse from."

"There are no other people. If you can't tell already I'm not exactly a people person for obvious reasons. And the farm I found the horse at was overrun with lame brains as you call them, poor thing was so spooked it took forever for me to calm it down."

"Hell of a job. Nearly trampled me."

"Well maybe if you didn't attack me because you thought I was some thief he wouldn't have done that. And for what because she hurt your manly egos for pulling the wool over your eyes?"

"You don't know anything bitch!" Scott says charging up to me and bringing his knife up to my throat.

"Enlighten me then."

"Back off Scott. Bitch wants a story then she'll get a story." Richie says.

Reluctantly Scott lowers his knife and stalks back to where he was sitting. I feel that the rope is slightly looser but not halfway done. As inconspicuously as I can I continue to cut my way out as he talks.

"A while back, we just got settled relatively close to here and were scouting the area. Scott, Randal and I were driving in that car you found on the side of the road-"Scott's laugh interrupts the story.

"I remember when we got that car. You think that pussy and his pretty little things made it?"

"The way we left 'em after our fun, I bet they didn't last the night." I feel sick, I don't want to imagine what happened but I can't help it. "Shame that got us in hot water with the others though. Wanted us to be on our best behavior after that. Anyway back to the story, we were driving along the road when this woman comes out waving her arms like crazy. We pulled over and she was thanking god we found her, that we were the first people she's seen in a long time and said she'd do anything if we helped her. She was a skinny thing but still had decent tits and hips." I let out a scoff at that and he laughs. "I know what you're thinking but we were actually did the gentlemanly thing and took her back to our camp. Everyone was smitten with her because she was a little too friendly, Randal and Weasel over there especially. Late that however is when the story gets interesting. I'm at my watch waiting for our leader to take over, when he didn't show I realized something was up. So I went to his tent and found the girl clocked him out to steal his stuff. No longer was she a damsel in distress, she was a snake who slithered into our nest and boy did she attack me when I found her." He gestures to the scars on his face. "While she was trying to claw my eyes our camp was ambushed by the group that followed her back. They beat us up, some of us to death, took a good portion of our food, meds and weapons and hauled their asses out of there. Ever since we've been scrambling to make it and we've been trying to hunt the bitch down ever since."

"And you thought I was her?" I asked "is that why you're keeping me?"

"Seems suspicious of you too be out here by yourself. Sides you could almost pass for her twin. Same eyes, dark hair, small yet curvy."

"That doesn't say much. I'm not exactly unique looking."

"Oh yeah, then how many people do you know who have that exact same tattoo of yours on their right wrist?"

I almost drop the knife when I hear that, it couldn't be. It's not possible. R-Reese was… alive? She was close by? But that doesn't sound like my sister at all. The girl I knew would never attack and leave other people for dead. Then again I'm not the girl she knew either. Would she even recognize me if I found her? Would I recognize her?

"Why do you look so shocked sweetheart?" Quint speaks up.

"Looks like our thief rings a bell for her after all." Scott says.

"I think you're right." Richie gets up and comes toward me. I try not to look at him but he grabs my chin and roughly pulls my face towards him pointing his pistol at me with his other hand. "You have a group after all?"

"Fuck off."

"Someone gonna come looking for you?" he runs his other down my side, his jagged nails sliding down my body sickens me. "A friend, family, maybe a possessive lover?"

"Don't touch me." I growl at him.

"So much spunk. You know what I like to do with spunk?"

"I do. And that's not going to happen."

"No one's coming to save you sweetheart."

"I know that. I spent my life driving away people that could probably save me. I was trying to prove I'm something I'm not and look where it got me. Tied up with no one giving a dam and you and friends are going to rape me, maybe beat me some more, and then you're going to slaughter me like cattle because that's all I am to you. All I am to anyone. But I'm not going to just lie down and take it. I'm going to fight, because I would rather die than let a sick mother fucker like you touch me."

He opens his mouth to say something when we hear something. A faint sound that's getting louder and louder. I thought it was a herd for a minute but it's not a growling sound. If anything it's more like sound of an engine, a very familiar engine. The guys pick up their guns and look toward the sound, not realizing that behind them walkers are approaching drawn to the sound. Taking the opportunity I head butt Richie in the chin and try to make a run for it. I hear a loud crack and his gun goes off in surprise. I don't stop as the others start shouting and the walkers attack, I just run as fast as I can weaving through trees and avoiding as many walkers as I could.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

"We gotta get out of here!"

"Not until I get that bitch!"

"Wes! They got Wes!"

"You're fucked now bitch! You're gonna wish for death when I'm done with you!"

Behind me I hear gunshots and the sound of screaming. Needing to catch my breath I slide over a ledge and hide in the small cave-like opening. Breathing heavily I listen to the chaos happening behind me. I hear Wesley screaming in pain and realize that he must have gotten bitten. But I don't feel as bad as I thought I would feel, even though he let me escaped I don't feel saddened by his death. I just want to focus on getting out alive. The gunfire ceases but I still hear screaming.

"Please, d- don't hurt me! Aaaaaaaaah!" Why would you beg a walker not to hurt you?

"Where is she?" Someone shouts, that voice-

"I- I don't know-"

"Don't shit with me! What have you done to her?"

"Daryl?" I whisper to myself, it can't be. A long agonizing loud scream echoes through the woods. Inching myself forward I look around to see if anyone is here before launching myself out of the cave to see if I was right.

"Daryl-"a hand covers my mouth and I'm thrown to the ground again. Richie is straddling me, looking at me with so much anger and hatred in his eyes.

"You're tough." He pulls out a knife and brings it down on me, I let out a scream expecting pain but just hear a loud tear as he cuts my shirt down the middle. "But not that tough."

He grabs both of my wrists in one hand and pins them above my head while attacking at my neck with his teeth. I grit my teeth as he pierces my skin hard, drawing blood and works his way down toward my chest while his other hand is fumbling with the button on my jeans. Fear mixed anger runs through me, I can practically feel my blood try to explode out of my veins. Letting out a yell I thrust my head forward and bite down hard on his ear. He screams hard and I flip him over tearing his ear off with my teeth and grabbing the knife from his hands. Spitting out the ear I plunge the knife into his chest over and over again crying with rage. The warm blood sprays all over my bare skin but I don't care, just keep stabbing while staring into his fear filled eyes.

"You fucking cunt!" I'm grabbed by hair and my head is pulled back but a sharp sound pierces through the air and Scott lets out a cry. I turn to see a bolt in his arm and Daryl stalking towards him. The look on his face was one that would probably make the devil sweat. His cold blue eyes were practically an inferno of rage and hate.

"Please!" Scott begs backing away. "Take the psycho. Just spare me!"

Daryl shoots another bolt into Scott's leg, he howls out in pain before Daryl grabs his head and starts punching him. With every plea that slips from Scott's mouth Daryl punches him harder. This was a whole new level of angry. He didn't even look like an animal, he looked like a demon. I turn to look at Richie and realize he's no longer breathing. His eyes were now permanently frozen in fear. The anger and fear was flowing through me has left and now I only feeling horrified at what I've done. I didn't just kill him, I slaughtered him. I probably looked just as horrifying if not more as Daryl right now.

"Daryl!" I shout at him but he doesn't stop. I run up to him and grab his fist. "Daryl stop! He's dead."

He slowly turns his head to look at me and I can't help but sob at the rage and sorrow in his eyes as he looks at me. He came for me, he said he was done looking for people and yet he went looking for me when I needed him most.

"D-did he-" I shake my head no knowing what he's trying to ask. He looks behind me and I see the anger return to his eyes again. He probably feels like he's failed, he couldn't save Sophia and he didn't make it in time to spare me from all this.

"Don't!" I shout trying to snap him out of it. I blame my emotions and all of the stress that I've been under for what happened next. I leaned forward crashed my lips onto his. It was one of the most awkward and excruciatingly embarrassing kisses I've ever had. He spazzed out like a kid who was afraid of cooties and bite my lip as I pulled away. It wasn't out of love, it was out of gratitude, fear and wanting desperately to snap him out of it.

"What the hell was that for?" he yelled at me.

"You came for me." I said crying. "I was going to- to be- and you saved me when I lost hope of ever being saved."

I cross my arms to cover myself from the cold. Daryl shrugs off his coat and drapes it over me. He's no longer mad, but rather concerned and somewhat uncomfortable. I lean on him and continue to cry, slowly and uncertainly, he wraps his arms around me and hugs me back.

"I can't face the others like this." I blurt out. "I can't give them something else to worry about." Or let them treat me like a fragile doll.

"I'll take you back to my tent. Only Carol and Maggie know you're gone so far." He helps me get up and walks me back to his motorcycle. Wrapping my arms around his torso, he revs the engine and we take off, passing random walkers to get back to the farm.

* * *

_The Next morning_

I woke up to the smell of Daryl cooking squirrel over the fire. I sat down by the old mill house and ate it in the silence. He looks exhausted, I guess he didn't get much sleep last either. Carol came by the tent to check on me. Rick, Glenn and Hershel were still missing so Daryl finally agreed going to go looking for him with the others. I didn't even fight him when he told me to stay here, I don't have the energy to fight him after everything that happened. He noticed that and I think it kind of scared him. The way he and Carol have been looking at me since I got back made me feel like I was on suicide watch. Actually that's probably exactly what's going on right now because I haven't been left alone since we came back.

"Here. I brought you some fresh clothes." Carol said. I gave Daryl back his coat and stole one of his shirts to sleep in.

"Thank you."

"Are you still in pain?" she asks coming up to look at my face, I was sporting quite a few bruises.

"Nothing I can't handle." She sits down next to me. "You don't have to coddle me." I say.

"I know that, I know that you're a brave and strong young woman. I always knew that and yesterday when you told me what happened to you as a child proved how right I was. But when I realized you were gone last night, when the horse came back without you… it felt like I lost my little girl all over again." She clasps my hand. "I'm not trying to guilt you for what you happened, you had a noble reason for doing it and it's a rare quality to be so selfless. But I just want you to know that when you're thinking of putting yourself at risk to help others, there are people here who would be just as devastated if something bad happened to you as well." She gets up to leave. "The others found out about what happened. But lucky for you Shane's still more upset over Lori going after them."

"I never thought I'd actually be thankful for Lori's recklessness."

"True, but they don't know everything about what happened to you. If they did they'd be a hell lot more upset."

"How much do they know?"

"Just that you took a horse to look for them but ran into some trouble. We figured you should be the one to tell them exactly what happened but for now they just think you ran into walkers."

"I don't think they'll believe walkers gained the ability to beat me up."

"This should be thick enough to hide a good amount of the swelling."

"Is this-"

"Yeah. I don't use it anymore now that Ed's gone."

I flip it open and stare at the little mirror inside. Looking back at me though is someone I can barely recognize. Other than the bruises that now adorn the left side of my face I notice that my eyes have lost their shine, my hair lost its luster, my face is thinner, and on the right side of my forehead is the scar from where I had stitches. Guess it really has been a while since I looked in a mirror. Dabbing the make-up on my face and blending it in I manage to get rid of a good portion of the swelling. I put on the clean clothes Carol gave me and make my way towards the house. As I arrive a car pulls up and I see Rick, Glenn and Hershel get out of the car.

"Dad!" Carl shouts happily and runs up to hug him. Maggie runs up to her dad but passes him to hug Glenn.

"You're okay."

"Patricia, prepare the shed for surgery." Hershel says. Surgery?

"Who the hell is that?" T-Dog says pointing to the car. In the back a young man is passed out with a blindfold over his eyes.

"That's Randall." Rick says. Randal? Why does that name sound familiar?

* * *

**And that's the end! I think in the next episode a week is supposed to have passed so my question is would you guys like some filler/bonding chapters or just get on with the story? Also I've been wondering if this story should have a playlist. Just some songs to recommend to set the mood or define the relationship between them. I have a couple in mind if anyone is interested but I would also really love to see some recommendations and see the type of music you guys are into. So if you are interested please either leave me recommendations in reviews or PM if you don't feel comfortable sharing it publicly. I think this could be fun.**

**P.S: I just put up a sample of the playlist in my profile. I've taken some suggestions (and still will) as well as put in my own that I've either played while I was writing it or felt it related to story**


	34. bonus triggerfinger

**Author's Note: sorry about not responding to reviews for a while. I really meant to and I really don't have a good excuse for not doing it. So now I'll do the best I can to catch up. Oh and there is a playlist for the story now. the link is on my profile to a playlist on youtube. STILL TAKING REQUESTS AND UPDATING IT!**

**Hannah-Rampage: Thank you! and I do know what you mean by you feel like your reading the show (that's actually a huge complement for me)**

**DaunlessIsMyMiddleName: haha sorry for the freak out but Daryl did go after her! **

**LadyCaysie:always good to hear from you :)**

**BriiMarie: I'm so glad you enjoyed it and wow that's a lot of nice things you wrote! I don't know if i'm that great of a writer but that is really sweet and encouraging of you to say. **

**Jada17: Glad you're hooked!**

**Chelsea/Guest (I think you are the same person?) It's okay about being confused about Glenn, I was trying be different when I introduced him. Glad you love the story and I took some of your suggestions for the playlist. Great artists by the way!**

**Commander of Murders: i'm glad you like the story! I'm not sure how much you've seen but Daryl's character kind of does change throughout the show. I'm trying to write him as best as I can but there may be times where he's slightly out of character to go along with the story. But if he does seem OOC I do appreciate when people point that out so thank you. As for you're song choice it's a great song, but it doesn't really go with the story. If you want I could do a one-shot or short story with these characters based on it. **

**enchantmentanjel: Glad you like it and yes they're will be more filler/bonding chapters. As for how much... not sure yet lol**

**Guest: there will definitely be more of Nat and Daryl, don't worry ;)**

**Note: Okay this is mostly filler and it mostly gives Daryl's insight about the attack. Sorry if it doesn't progress much but I need some time to properly plan out the rest of the story.**

* * *

-Third person POV-

Shane returned with Lori a little while ago. He convinced her to come back by lying about Rick returning to the farm. When she found out about it she was furious with him and confronted him about it in front of everyone which ended with him revealing that Lori was pregnant to everyone. Once the commotion died down Carol went to sit on the front porch to wait for Daryl to come back with Natalie. No one else knew she was gone because Maggie and Carol were keeping it a secret (it also helped everyone was distracted by Lori). Hearing the sound of his bike Carol looked up to see him driving towards her. She rushes up to him only to find him alone.

"Where's Natalie?" she asked worriedly.

"Back at my tent. I need you to come with me."

"What happened? Is she alright?"

"She will be eventually. I need you to bring her a change of clothes, wet cloth, and maybe some pain killers."

She wants to question him more. but holds her tongue and goes to get the things he asked her. He drove her back to his camp, she got off the bike quickly and went to peek in his tent. Inside Natalie was lying in there, her eyes were closed in pain and she was covered in blood and bruises.

"Oh god!" Carol cried out and went into the tent. She stroked Natalie's hair back and gently started to dab at her face with the cloth. Natalie winced, but let her continue. "You'll be okay. You'll be okay."

He stepped away from the tent to give them some privacy and sat down by the fire. Everything that happened was racing through his mind. He had really meant it when he said he was done looking for people, but when he heard Natalie was missing something in him snapped. Without even thinking about it he started to grab his things to look for her. When the horse came charging and he found the blood on its bridle a horrible feeling of panic struck him. It was almost like losing his brother all over again and he was just as angry.

* * *

"_Please, d- don't hurt me!" the one man left alive begged._

_ To someone randomly passing by they would have just thought that these were poor souls who barely made it out alive from an attack. The one kid was lying dead on the ground next to the walkers that bit him, practically shredded from all of the bites he received. But Daryl knew better, the sound of a gun going off made him pull over and he heard Natalie escaping. The threats the men made towards her infuriated Daryl so much that he felt no sympathy for the man on the ground begging for his life. He swung his crossbow and hit the man in the face._

"_Aaaaaaaaah!" he screamed in pain. _

"_Where is she?" Daryl shouted, grabbing the man by his shirt._

"_I- I don't know-"_

"_Don't shit with me! What have you done to her?"_

"_She ran!" the guy yelled. "She broke free and ran north. The other guys ran after her!" _

_ A growling sound gained their attention, turning their heads they saw Wesley reanimated as a walker sitting up and looking at them hungrily. _

"_Please!" Quint pleaded. "It's the other two who beat and wanted us to rape her. I just go along with it to survive."_

"_Then try to survive this!" Daryl threw Quint to walker Wesley and ran north to look for Natalie, the sounds of Quint's screams fading behind him. _

_He wasn't sure who he was mad at more. Natalie for getting herself into this mess or the men who were going to attack her. But when he finally reached her and saw the sight before him all of his anger at her faded away. Instead, he directed it at the bastard who was trying to avenge his friend, beating him senseless. With every hit he let out everything he was angry about. The brother he lost, the girl he couldn't save, the father that bestowed all of his rage, and the demons who will never go away._

"_Daryl stop! He's dead." Natalie stops him by grabbing his fist. _

_ Slowly looking over at her he takes in the damage that has been done to her. The left side of her face was covered in bruises, the dark purple an astounding contrast against her pale skin. The rest of her skin had splatters of blood on it staining her black bra, arms, and face. He never saw her look so weak before, so vulnerable and terrified. Then he thought of the worst thing he could of. Seeing her bare skin and the faint teeth marks that flared on her skin left an image in his head that infuriated him and terrified him at the same time._

"_D-did he-"he couldn't even finish saying it without trembling in anger. _

_She understood him though, and said no. Her eyes were still wide with fear as she said it. He looked over at the body at the man she stabbed and anger flowed through him. The man sort of resembled his own father when he was younger and the memories flowed through him. All of the yelling, hitting and whipping his father inflicted upon him was still very clear in his brain and the idea of this man, someone was capable of taking pleasure out the weak and defenseless, someone who was going to do unspeakable things and leave for dead in the dirt the one person he had left to actually care about sent Daryl to a dangerous place. For even though the man was dead Daryl felt he didn't suffer enough. He should have suffered a far more painful death, begging for an end only to be denied and suffer more agony. Why should a pitiful worm like him get a more peaceful death than a little girl? A little girl who was bitten and had to suffer a long, painful death alone and terrified in the woods. _

"_Don't!" Natalie called out, but it didn't help. He was pulled too deeply into a vortex of rage self-deprecation. He felt doomed to watch everyone suffer and not be able to save them, that he would just never be good enough to-_

_ His thoughts were interrupted by the sensation of slightly chapped lips being pressed against his. Shivers erupted throughout his whole body and he tensed from the sudden impact. His fight or flight senses kicked in and he pulled away abruptly, but not before he accidentally bit her lip. It took him a moment to register what had happened. He was so used to being attacked that anything physical, whether it was abusive, an act of passion or anything that wasn't intended to cause to cause physical pain frightened him. It completely caught him off guard and he hated that._

"_What the hell was that for?" he yelled at her._

"_You came for me." She said softly as she cried. "I was going to- to be- and you saved me when I lost hope of ever being saved." She shivered and crossed her arms._ _The realization of her being so bare suddenly made Daryl uncomfortable. Not that he hadn't seen her somewhat undressed before, but this time it felt evasive. She wasn't in control this time, her dignity was stripped away and she looked like she wanted to hide. He understood because of the scars on his back, he never wanted anyone to see his vulnerability. _

_Taking off his coat and slightly averting his eyes, he draped it over her. As he pulls his hands away, she leans forward and cries on his shoulder. He felt really awkward, he wanted to move, but he was frozen to the spot. Looking at her so broken was strange for him, like it was a whole different side to her than the one he knew. But he remembered the fight and it became clearer to see why she was so upset. It wasn't just the attack that upset her, it was the fear of being alone. Like him she never had someone to really depend on. She always saved her sister from bad situations, but she never had someone to save her. Someone she could depend on when she needed help. Guilt flooded him when he remembered how he said he was done finding people. Because of that she thought no one was coming to save her, that she was going to die by herself. Yet here he was, he was able to save her. He was able to save someone. Hesitantly he wrapped his arms around her, shocked that he actually was responding to her. But for the first time it felt right. _

"_I can't face the others like this." she blurts out. "I can't give them something else to worry about." _

"_I'll take you back to my tent." He says. "Only Carol and Maggie know you're gone so far." He helps her get up and walks her back to his motorcycle. He looks back at her as she wraps her arms around his torso, her head was down and she was solemn as he drove off. _

* * *

After he reviewed the whole thing in his head, he did it again and again. Over and over he imagined everything that happened. The herd, the camp, interrogating that guy, losing control and killing the other, and the kiss, the god damn kiss. He hated that he was still thinking of. He could hear his brother teasing him about it, calling him a pussy for thinking about it. He couldn't help it though, it startled him. Not because he'd never been kissed before, he's been with a few women before. Mostly to shut Merle up and try to fulfill his occasional needs. But it was never serious. They were mostly the whores his brother hung around with or tramps looking for a wild time with someone like him. Natalie wasn't one of those girls though, she wasn't a horny toad looking for no strings attached. She was different, someone who actually bothered to try to make a connection with him and can't help but care about other people. It was her fatal flaw and something that he both admired and hated.

"She fell asleep." Carol said as she came out of the tent. "Took some strong pain killers so she's probably out for the night."

He didn't say anything hoping she would leave, but she didn't. Instead he heard her step forward.

"Thank you." She said. "I know you said you wouldn't, but if you hadn't-"

"It wouldn't have happened if she just stayed here." he snapped.

"Daryl-"

"No I'm gonna speak the truth! She's smarter than that, knows that it's dangerous to go out there, but goes and does it anyway!"

"Doesn't that sound familiar to you?" Carol retorts. Daryl raised an eyebrow at that, she didn't usually sass him back.

"At least I have more experience! Why does she always spring into action, even when she's not capable of it?"

"Because she can't stand by and watch people suffer if she thinks she can do something about it. I think she still feels guilty about what happened to her mother." That part caught Daryl's attention.

"Her mom was killed in a random home invasion when she was a kid. What's she got to feel guilty about?"

"She didn't tell you?" she asked surprised.

"Tell me what?" Carol looked guilty, like she just realized it was a mistake to tell him. "Come on. You can't just drop something like that. Tell me!"

"She- she blames herself for what happened because she feels she got her mother killed." Daryl's anger faded. "It wasn't random. Her mom's boyfriend broke in to kill her and her sister. He wanted to be the only priority in her life. Her mom killed him in self-defense, but it was too late, Natalie was already shot. She thought her daughter was dead and couldn't live with the guilt, so she killed herself."

"Yet Natalie lived." He said mostly to himself. "When'd she tell you all this?" he asked.

"Today in the RV. I think she only told me because she was afraid I'd do the same, because of Sophia. I don't know if I was going to, but I know that I can't now. Not after hearing her story." She looks toward the tent. "Don't give her a hard time. We've all been through enough today."

She gets up to leave and Daryl sits there for a moment, thinking about what she just said. Maybe Natalie was right, when she said broken people are drawn together like magnets. He got up and went into his tent, he sat down and picked up the wood he has been working on for a few days that he stashed in his bed. It was a long piece of wood that curved like a crescent moon and had a single string tied to each end. It wasn't much, not like the last one she had, but it should work well for her with some practice. He looked up at Natalie when he heard a sob. He saw a lone tear slide down her bruised face. Something stirred inside him as he watched her sleep. He felt this warmth, a need to protect her and make sure she will never be hurt again. Maybe she was right after all, that broken people were drawn together like magnets looking to fix each other. He refused to admit though at the time, thought that no one could fix him or understand him.

_"I never said I did." _He remembered her words from before_. "I don't know about your past or your father because you don't confide in me or anyone. I only know some things about you. I know you're an excellent tracker, hotheaded, and crass. I also know once you set your mind on something, there's nothing that can stop you, you smarter than everyone gives you credit for, and I know that you have your scar. But that's okay, I do too. Everyone has scars, some are more visible than others. But they don't define us. They're more like reminders of where we've been." _

He wasn't sure if he believed her though, it seemed too good to be true that she didn't care that he was scarred, didn't see him as weak or too damaged. She is able to see him for who he really was, who he wanted to be for so long. But how long would that last? How long before like everyone else she looks at him like scum? Whenever that was he knew he had to be ready for it. He knew that he couldn't let himself get any closer to her because it'll hurt more when he finally loses her, when he finally has nothing left.

* * *

**Sorry if he's a little OOC. I just feel that if Natalie were real and having these interactions with him in the show than maybe certain characteristics he has that are shown or hinted at later in the show would probably happen somewhat sooner if that makes any sense. Also please tell me if i'm making him too emo. I don't know about you guys but I prefer witty Daryl over emo Daryl. (nothing wrong being emo. PLEASE DON'T THINK THAT. Its just a preference for me)**


	35. Authors Note, review responses

**Hi you guys,**

**I know that a lot of you are waiting for the next chapter and I am so sorry for the wait. I've been trying to plot out certain things, get in the right mindset to write them out, and I actually thought that I might have been able to post today but some things got in the way of writing. **

**Mostly things like babysitting my nephew, getting interrupted by family members who don't understand how important writing is to me, work, running errands and I actually just submitted a writing sample to hopefully get a job as a ghost writer so cross you're fingers for me! **

**But yeah, once I pick up my nephew to take care of while my sister goes through a personal crisis I'll get back to finishing the next chapter. Thank you all so much for being patient and loving my story.**

**In the meantime I'll respond to some comments.**

**LadyCaysie: I feel really lucky to have someone be so supportive to the story like you are. Thank you so much :)**

**Guest (1): Glad you liked it :)**

**Guest (2): Haha I'm glad you liked that line. It's one of my favorites too and something I can actually picture Daryl saying!**

**Guest (3): Thank you. I hope you continue to enjoy it :)**

**: I'm glad you are enjoying it! It's always interesting to see who catches up and who continues to read it :)**

**Guest (3 and 4, at least I think you are the same person): I'm trying! I will absolutely continue to update but sadly I'm not good with consistency and deadlines. **

**m0nalisat0dalie88: haha i'm glad you love it and need more. and really Daryl is spot on?! Thank you so much! That means a lot!**

**Courtney-Tamara: I'm glad you adore this and the relationship between Natalie and Daryl. And yes, I do miss Natalie's playful side as well because it was a lot more fun to write. But just like you said it'd be weird if she was like that all the time under the circumstances and I'm glad you understand it. But that doesn't mean she won't come back! ;) She just needs the right time and place to be that way.**

**Thank you all so much. I know I probably say this a lot but it really does mean a lot to me and I love all of you who continue to read and love the story. It may sound strange but Natalie means a lot to me and so does her relationship with Daryl. They are characters that I've written about that I really do feel a connection with and boast my confidence about my writing. Looking back at old chapters I think I've actually improved over time. :)**

**Oh and just in case this isn't allowed I've got Daryl to take my side. **

*_Comes out from behind me with his crossbow*_ "You really wanna mess with me?"


	36. Trust

**Okay it's finally here! Took way longer than I expected and I wish I could say it was to make it longer and better but really it's because it's been so long since I did something that wasn't based off the script I had no idea if it would work! Also I got a new job and had to settle into that, I got some of my other shit together so now I just need to learn how to juggle it and plan things! **

**Sorry for mistakes, i'll edit later because I need to go to bed soon in order to get up for work.**

**Review Responses:**

**Gingerman454: Aw you're a sweetie! Don't worry I'm getting my life together pretty well now. **

**Guest: Your review touched me so much. I'm glad you liked Nicotine (I'm guessing your the one who confused me when they said they never even saw Boondock Saints. I was wondering how they would have found the story if they didn't lol.) Also to know that people miss my writing and Natalie means so much because even I miss Natalie when I don't get to write about her and writing really does make feel good and like i'm good at something. Also I completely fell in love with the song Broken Girl and it's on the playlist. I thought it was so great because it gives hope that no matter what happened to you you can get through it. Which is kind of what I try put in as one of the themes in the story. **

**Guest (Sakura): Yeah I'm having a walking dead withdraw after the season ended lol. I'm so glad you like the story and it's one of your favorites.**

* * *

It hit me like a brick smashing through a window. It took me practically all of yesterday and a good majority of this morning to remember where I might have heard the name Randal before. I don't even know what caused me to remember it all of a sudden but I remembered that Randal was one of the names mentioned by the guys at the camp. I guess with all of trauma I'd been through it slipped my mind when Rick brought him back. Since then though Randal's been kept in the barn with Hershel, Rick and Shane going to check in on him every now and then. It's probably better that way to be honest. Even though I don't know the guy I feel a lot safer with him put away. After that night… I just don't think we should risk it. The things those men told me, what they've done, what's been done to them, I can't risk letting that happen to my group. And if that guy was right, if that really was my sister then I can't just sit here anymore. I need to go out there. I need to look for her, look for any signs of Randal's group or other rogue groups that could hurt us. But I can't do it alone. I realize now that it was a mistake.

"Rick?" I knock on the door frame to the study. Rick was in there leaning over a desk that had a map. He looks up at me waiting for me to speak. "Sorry to interrupt but, I need to get something off my chest. It's about what happened that night and Randal."

He walks towards me and gently leads me in, poking his head out the door frame to see if anyone is around before closing it. I can't help but feel self-conscious. I've barely spoken to Rick for the past few days, actually I probably haven't really talked to him since we got here. He's been so busy with both the group's problems and his own problems that he just seemed unapproachable. I never wanted to bother him unless I thought it was absolutely necessary.

"You okay?" Rick asks concerned noticing my hesitation and nervous posture. It's probably because I stopped bothering trying to hide my bruises, they were now a greenish yellow color against my skin that made everyone uncomfortable looking at me for too long.

"Yeah. I just- I'm sort of-"he takes a step toward me and I immediately step back. "Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"It's okay." He says calmly. "Just relax, take a deep breath and tell it at your own pace."

I inhale sharply and exhale. "You've done this a lot haven't you?"

"Part of being a cop." He says.

"Guess that's why I'm nervous."

"Don't be. It's not an interrogation. I'm not going to lecture about what happened or accuse you of anything. I'm just listening to a friend tell me what happened to her."

"I know I shouldn't have gone by myself. I should have waited and trusted that you guys would come back. But after burying Sophia I was wasn't thinking straight. I was distraught and ashamed that I wasn't able to help her, so I guess seeing Beth helpless and Maggie upset made me want to do something."

"I get that." he says. "So did you borrow a car or walk there."

"I asked Maggie if I could borrow a horse and not tell anyone where I went. On my way there though I saw a car pulled over on the side of the road, the exact same model of Carol's car. Thinking that it was you and Glenn in trouble I stopped to investigate it. Right away I realized something was off but I was ambushed and taken back to their camp. They had my hands and feet bound as they interrogated me. Wanted to know if I was with a group that attacked them a while back and where I was staying. I wouldn't tell though. No matter how hard they hit me I wouldn't tell." I rub the rope mark that was still on my wrist. It was taking a long time for it to heal.

"I know you wouldn't. Since I met you I knew you were tough. You were the first person willing to go to Atlanta to save Merle, didn't need to convince you to help me save Glenn, and what impressed me most of all is not many people, woman or man, would go toe to toe with someone like Daryl like you would."

I chuckle at that, a small smile returning to my face remembering better times. "I think most people aren't as reckless as I am. Most people know when to give up, but I couldn't. I've come to think of this group as family. Which is why I want to ask you if we could go back to the camp I was at. I think that if Randal is a part of their group then maybe something there would give us a clue about where the others might have gone."

He ponders it for a moment and my stomach tenses nervously waiting for an answer. Maybe it was a stupid idea but if I didn't bring it up I'd feel guilty if something happened.

"Are you sure you're up for it?" he asks.

"I'll deal with it. One of the five guys that was there left to go find his brother, if he's still alive I'd feel guilty if he ended up leading the others they mentioned back here."

"Okay. You and I will check it out. I won't ask for a lot of people this time, Randal being here has everyone wound up enough."

"So just you, me, Shane-"

"Shane should stay here with the others." He interrupted me. I see that he looks conflicted when he mentions Shane. "We'll just say where checking the area and going into town."

"Okay…" I say hesitantly. "I'll meet you by Carol's car in a little bit then." I walk out of the study, making my way to my tent to get my stuff and see who I might want to invite with us. Reaching the porch I look off into the distance towards Daryl's camp.

"_Let's just cool off." Dale said. He was right. Now was not the time to discuss Randal's fate if no one could think rationally. Everyone dispersed from the dining room, I followed Carol's line of vision and saw Daryl. I wonder what he was thinking about the whole situation. _

"_Hey-"I try to call out to him as I get out of my chair but he acts like he doesn't hear me and walks out the screen door. I stand there dumbfounded, he rarely ignores me like that. Carol turns her head away from the door to look at me. _

"_Maybe he didn't hear you." She says to comfort me. I can see that even she doesn't believe it. _

"_No." I say. "He did. He's just pulling away." _

"_You don't know that for sure." _

"_Maybe you're right. It just… feels like I fucked things up." _

"_Why would you think that?"_

"_I-"_

_ Flashes yesterday fill my mind. I see myself pleading with Daryl not to leave, him telling me he's done looking for people, brutally killing Richie and watching Daryl attack Scott like a mad man, the look on his face when I pulled him off Scott and he saw my disheveled appearance, and then I saw the kiss. _

"_I just do." My face feels scalding hot thinking about it. Carol looks like she wants to ask but I hear Shane calling for me. _

"_Guess I couldn't avoid getting yelled at by him for too long." I walk away from her to see Shane standing on the porch with a disappointed look on his face._

I haven't seen him since then. I thought about inviting him to come with us but I decided against it. I was actually kind of afraid to see him. The way he looked at me made uncomfortable. Almost as if if he said the wrong thing I would shatter into a million pieces and like he was afraid of me. I felt embarrassed. That wasn't how I wanted anyone to see me, especially him. It feels like in less than I day I changed our whole friendship, but I'm too scared to find out if it was for the better or worse.

"You're going out?" I turn to face Dale.

"Yeah. Doing an area check."

"Are you sure you're up for it? With what happened yesterday?"

"I can handle it. Besides, Rick will be with me."

"Anyone else?" I see he's looking behind me towards Daryl's camp.

"We can handle it. Besides with what happened yesterday there should be more people here to protect the place."

"Good point, but I'm worried about you. I know that we've been through a lot, and I am truly sorry for all the pain you felt with Sophia. But you don't have to bear all this alone. All of this pain, anger and sadness is changing you but it doesn't have to completely take over."

"I know I do. But it's not easy. I can't just spring back up on my feet and act like everything is normal."

"I'm not asking for that. I just want you to heal, even if Daryl is the one to help you."

"Not this again. Look there's nothing going on between us. Besides, after everything that happened he's trying to distance himself from us. Even me." I fiddle with my pendant and swallow the lump in my throat. "I gotta go get my stuff. Rick should be out soon."

* * *

"Turn right at the next intersection. It should be a couple miles after that." I direct Rick as we drive along. It was mostly quiet except for when I gave a few directions. He didn't say much but would nod his head to let me know he heard me. I wish I brought Glenn or even T-Dog with us, it was so awkward just the two of us. Like I was some punk he picked up and was taking to the station for something stupid like vandalism or drunken disorderly. Actually with the way I've been acting recently that's probably exactly how he viewed me.

"I- I'm sorry." I blurt out. He looks at me confused.

"For what?"

"You know. For leaving the farm like that, giving you a hard time about Sophia going missing, you know being a pain in the ass in general." He laughs at that.

"Please. Have you really been around some of the others? You're the least of my problems."

I laugh at that. "Thank you, for everything you've done." He stops smiling but I continue. "I mean it. Shane may believe he has everyone's best intentions at heart, maybe he does, but he's been too reckless. You can't just go charging into situations without thinking. You need to be diplomatic, plan ahead, weigh all the pros and cons of the situation. Like you do."

"Sounds kind of like you think that way too. Why don't you speak up a little more?"

"I'm not much of a leader. I don't like to get involved in other people's business."

"Like when you found out Lori was pregnant?"

"Glenn told you huh?" he really couldn't keep a secret.

"Don't worry. I'm not mad at you two, you did what you thought was right."

"I thought you'd understand. It just wasn't my place to tell, but I did want you to know. Oh stop the car!" I point towards the car up ahead and he pulls over to park the car. We get out and approach it, looking around to see if anyone has been near it recently. Walking over towards the passenger's side he stops and looks down at the walker I took out the day before.

"Your work I'm guessing?"

"Yeah."

"Not bad." He says impressed. "You were riding down the road when you saw the car and stopped?" He goes to check out the inside of the car as I talk.

"Yeah I saw the walker clawing at the passenger's seat so I took it out with the bat. But when I looked in it no one was there and everything in their confirmed it wasn't your car." He picks up the picture of the man and the twin girls and looks at it.

"Was he one of them?" I shook my head taking the photo from him.

"I think whoever attacked me stole the car from them. After they… it's not important now." I pocket the photo. "What is important is that I was attacked here." I saw motioning to the blood and broken bat pieces on the road. "Then I got away and ran that way before they grabbed me and dragged me to their camp for the night."

I lead him through the woods remembering the path that they dragged me down by my bound hands. I never felt more grateful to actually be walking there and to not have my body being scraped against rocks and broken twigs.

_Snap_.

We stop pulling out our weapons and getting into defensive stances as a walker walks out from behind the trees. Rick points his gun at him but I stop him.

"We don't know how many more of them there could be out here." I say before throwing my knife at the walker. It sinks into its skull and collapses on the ground. I walk over to make sure its not going to get up before taking my knife out and cleaning it.

"Almost forgot how good your aim was. What happened to your bow?"

"It got destroyed when the herd came through. But I'm making due. Gives me an excuse to try out new weapons like the machete."

"Not a bad idea. The others should probably learn how to use other weapons and I'm thinking of having another shooting lesson soon that I want you to come to."

"Why are you so adamant about that?"

"Because I believe you're a valuable asset to the group. After all that's happened I need people I can trust at my side." His words surprise me but I also feel touched. But I also couldn't help but feel guilty by his words. He trusts me but I'm leaving out something important. Something I'm afraid to bring up because I'm afraid it might be true.

"Aaaaaaaaaah!" A scream in the distance breaks me out of my thoughts. Rick and I waste no time and start running towards the source, the very same campsite we were looking for. The source of the scream was a man being attacked by a walker and his cries attracted more of them here.

"Get away from me!" He manages to throw the walker off him and tries to run towards us but he trips and falls to the ground. I see it's the guy who got away, Willie. He's covered in blood so he must have already been bitten.

"Help!" he screams when he sees us. "Please!"

"He's been bitten." Rick says to me warningly, like he's also debating helping him.

"We can't let him die like that though." I say to him. "Not without doing what we can." He nods his head and start running towards them. He starts shooting at the ones still trying to get to Willie and I take out the ones closing in on us with my knife. The sounds of Willie's screams and the Walker's yowls fill the air like a battle field. I stick my knife in their eye sockets like butter and they crumble to the ground. Rick makes his way to Willie as I'm taking out what I thought was the last walker, when I turned around though I saw a walker ganging on Rick who was crouching down by Willie.

"Rick!" I shout and sprint towards them.

Before the walker could grab him though I fisted a part of his jacket and pulled him away before his fingers could even graze him. It was Wesley, the boy who tried to help me the other night. His hair was tangled, his glasses were broken but surprisingly stayed on his face that was now covered in blood and skin was stuck to his teeth. I take a step back only to step on something fleshy. Looking down I see a body that has most of the flesh and chunks of it ripped off. The face was almost unrecognizable but I could tell by the clothes it was the other guy Quint. The one who I heard pleading for Daryl for spare him. Swallowing the acid in my mouth I look back up at Wesley only to have blood sprayed in my face as a loud gunshot rings through the air. I drop Wesley to the ground to see Rick standing there with his gun in his hand.

"You okay?" he asks me seeing that I'm in shock, I can tell that he's concerned but also grateful at the same time. I nod my head speechless and come towards him and Willie. He's breathing heavily and I can see the huge bite marks on his left shoulder and arm. He's definitely not going to make it.

"You." He says noticing me. "Why? Why'd you help me?" he asks.

"I had to." I say honestly. "I just couldn't watch someone die like that."

"_Huff_…_Huff_. You're… not like them… Not like her…" Rick looks at me confused but I mouth later to him.

"What happened here?" Rick asked him. "Where are the rest of your people?"

"Ah!" Willie grunted in pain. "Dead. They're all dead. My brother… everyone here."

"We know there's more of you." I say to him. "The others you went to look for in town. Where did they go?"

"I- I don't know. We- were afraid after what happened… wanted to be careful. Scout up north." He closed his eyes and let out another scream. "Please! Don't let me turn."

I look up at Rick to see him thinking, he looks at me asking if he should and I nod my head. We get up and take a couple steps back as he aims the gun at Willie's head.

"You don't have to suffer anymore." He said before shooting him in the head. We stood there in silence listening to see if there were more coming but all we heard were the sounds of the animals running and crying in fear. Then silence, eerier silence as I looked around at the massacre around us. I turn my head back to look at Wesley, something Rick noticed.

"Was he one of them?" he asked him.

"He was but he didn't hurt me. He was going to let me escape."

"Because you weren't who they thought you were? Do you know who they were talking about?"

"Yeah." I lock eyes with Rick. "There was a reason they attacked me. They thought I-" I try to get the next words out of my mouth but I can't. It feels like a foreign language because I can't understand it. I can't imagine my sister doing that to someone, I wouldn't allow myself to. "They mistook me for a thief. Someone who pretended to need help only for her group to attack them and steal their supplies."

The sound of rapidly crunching leaves startles us and Rick pulls me behind him aiming his gun at the source. A deer runs through the camp at lightning speed running over some sleeping bags and walker bodies on the ground. We both let out a sigh and he lowers his gun when something catches my eye. A beige piece of paper slightly torn was laying in the dirt. I walked over and picked it up to discover it was a map with several areas circled.

"Rick look." I say showing it to him. "These must be locations they were considering."

"I think you're right. Most of them are a good amount of distance away from the farm. Up north like the guy said." The sound of thunder crackles through the sky and I look up to see gray clouds threatening to rain all over us.

"We should get back." he says.

"Yeah, it looks like it's going to be a bad one."

"Natalie." Rick calls out as I try to walk back. "Thank you, for warning me."

"It's what friends do."

* * *

**Sorry it's short. Also I know that there was a serious lack of Daryl but there is a reason for it. I realized that I've had Nat around him she basically hasn't had much of her own plot besides what's already in the show and much she doesn't really interact with a lot of the others besides maybe Carol, Glenn and Dale. She also barely talked to Rick since Atlanta and I do want them to build a friendship and have her work her way up to becoming more part of the group. Don't worry, this is still about Nat and Daryl but I just want to try to make Natalie her own person and even give her more of a story than just being Daryl's love interest.** **I did have a story planned out for her and I still do but I realized that along the way I kind of haven't been developing it as well as I wanted to.**


	37. Chapter 37

_I'm truly sorry for getting your hopes up about a new chapter being posted but I just figured I should let you guys know what's up._

_Good news for me is I got a job! Bad news is that's why I haven't been posting as much. I've been working long hours and it's a physically and mentally (for me at least since I have to deal with a lot of people) exhausting job. So when I get home I don't always necessarily feel like trying to type and plot out more of a story. But that doesn't mean I'm giving up on this! Far from it, it just means that I'm most likely not going to be able to update every week probably more along the lines of once or twice a month. _

_Believe me I always think about this and how I want to type it but sometimes I just can't get into the mindset to do it. I'll have the story open on my computer to remind myself to do it but sometimes I can only get just a paragraph or a couple sentences typed in a about half an hour to an hour. It's probably also harder because I'm trying to think of filler instead of copying and pasting the lines from the next ep, once I finish this last filler chapter I'll get back on track and then it'll probably go a lot smoother._

_I love you all._

**_Natalie: She really does, besides I'll never leave her and I'll always bug her about finishing this._**

**_Daryl: And bugging people is Nat's specialty. _**

**_Natalie: Watch it Dixon, I know where you sleep at night!_**

**_Daryl: So you admit you watch me sleep at night._**

**_Natalie:... _**


	38. Chapter 38

**Authors note: OKAY BACK IN BUSINESS! I wasn't going to post anything today but I realized I had a good amount written down and since i'm having a little writers block with the second half I might as well put out the first half. It's been so long and I apologize for that but I am trying my best to do the best I can. Now it has been a while since I published anything so sorry if this isn't my best. The writers block was crazy strong lately and I had to scrape ideas for filler chapters because I couldn't finish them. **

**Thanks for all the reviews! And sorry for the wait. **

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**Ch. 18 miles out part 1**

The rain kept us inside for two days. The wind must have been blowing at about 30 miles per hour and thunder was roaring in the sky. Hershel even felt bad enough to let us stay inside during the storm, but I also think Maggie made sure he went through with it. It was an awkward week, there was tension over what happened in the barn and what to do about Randal. Rick and I have been debating about whether or not to check out the places on the map, but someone always walks into the room before we could decide anything. When that would happen, I would make an excuse to go check on Beth, who even though was improving physically, was not doing well mentally. She mostly shut herself in her room and had a dazed look on her face. We're trying our best to help her but it seems to not be working. I've been trying to keep an eye out for her. I didn't want anyone to worry, but from past experience it looks like Beth should be on suicide watch.

But other than all of that it's been pretty boring. I went gun training with Rick and the others a couple of times, though I was still hesitant I'm learning pretty quickly and even got bumped up to shotgun lessons. There's some kind of tension going on between Glenn and Maggie so I've been going back and forth to spend time with both of them and try to help them out. Unfortunately, I'm not that good with relationship stuff and I think it's pretty crazy that Maggie said she loved him after only a couple of days so that doesn't help me think rationally about this. So in my spare time like right now, I go out on the porch and practice playing that guitar Glenn found on the highway. It's one of the few things that's been helping me numb the pain of Sophia's death. I can just get lost in it and forget where I am for a moment. Forget the walkers, forget the deaths, and forget the awkwardness I now feel around the person I feel closest to.

"Natalie! Have you seen Hershel or Maggie?" Lori came out of the house panicking.

"No, what's wrong?" I ask putting down the guitar and stood up.

"Beth, she-"she couldn't finish, but she didn't have to.

"I'll go watch her. You go ask Andrea."

Before she could even answer me, I rushed into the house and went straight to Beth's room, she was curled up in her bed under the covers. She didn't even look up at me as I entered the room.

"She sent you here to keep an eye on me?" she said emotionlessly.

"I came on my own when I heard. I was worried."

"Why? You pretty much ignored me until now." She had me there. I didn't think she noticed though.

"That was before all this happened. I didn't want to try to get close to anyone when I got here. I thought we were going to leave once we…"found Sophia… I couldn't even finish that sentence though.

"The girl in the barn, were you close with her?" Beth asked me. "Was she your sister?"

"No but she might as well have been. I treated her like family once I lost all of mine."

"Then, seeing her like that must have been hard. I don't want Maggie or my dad to see me like that. I don't want to end up like that"

"But they wouldn't want you to do this either."

"I know but it's the only way. Even though everyone is going to be mad at me."

"No Beth, no one is mad at-"

"Beth?" Maggie's scream interrupted what I was going to say.

"You were saying?" Beth said, sitting up but still not looking at me.

"It may sound like she's mad, but if anything she's more scared about losing you." Maggie's footsteps were getting closer.

"I'll try to talk to her. Don't do anything while I'm gone."

I walk out of her room and close the door behind me just as Maggie walks up to it. I reach out my hand to stop her.

"You left her alone?!" she shouts at me.

"She's okay now, but she won't be if you go in there screaming at her."

"But what she tried to do was crazy and stupid!"

"It may be to us, but it's not to Beth. I know you guys went through a lot and I understand wanting to protect whatever family you have left, but Beth isn't as strong as you are. She's been more sheltered from these things and seeing Annette like that finally made her see just what kind of world we are living in now." Maggie slumps her shoulders.

"I know." She says. "I know that she's upset, we all are but I can't just baby her about this."

"I'm not saying you should. If anything that'd probably be the worst thing for her. You just need to remind her that she still has a reason to go on, even if she can't get her normal life back. If it's not working, then I give you permission to scream and yell and just do whatever you can to make her realize how much you truly care."

Maggie nods her head. Taking a couple of deep breaths releasing the tension from her body and most of the anger in her eyes fades. I step back and open the door for her, sliding to the side and leaning against the wall in case she needed me.

"Are you crazy?" Maggie asks Beth. I let out a sigh. That was definitely sisterly love. Not afraid to tell you exactly what they are thinking.

"What if dad finds out?" Maggie continues.

"What's he gonna do? Kill me for committing suicide?" Beth retorted. I let out a soft involuntary laugh before pulling myself back together.

"Stop being such a brat. He'd die. So would I. This isn't just about you. We all lost mom."

"We'll lose each other and I couldn't stand that." Beth said the words I thought of so many times in the past.

"So you give up?"

Beth didn't respond after that. I could hear an old grandfather clock ticking somewhere in the house and Lori is shuffling around in the kitchen. It unnerved me how quiet it was, it was going to get ugly real soon. I peel myself off of the wall and make my way downstairs. No sooner than when I hit them middle step I heard yelling coming from Beth's room. I guess now was the time for Maggie to fight for Beth's life. I walk into the kitchen to see Andrea leaning against a counter and Lori sitting on top of another.

"Couldn't do anything to help?" Andrea asked me.

"I did all I could to make sure Maggie knew what she was getting into. But other than that I couldn't get through to Beth."

"Where's Hershel?" Andrea asked Lori.

"He doesn't want to find out yet." Lori says, picking up a chip of a plate of food and eating it. "It's a family affair. We'll let them work it out." She finishes.

"That's working it out?" Andrea asked.

"It's how me and I sister used to work things out." I retorted only to get unamused glances from the women. I shrug my shoulders, if they saw the fights Reese and I used to have a long time ago they'd think it was like an episode of Jerry Springer.

"When Beth stops fighting, that's when it's time to worry." Lori said, getting of the counter to clean up the dishes.

"_You are being so selfish!" _I could hear Maggie scream from upstairs.

"This could've been handled better." Andrea said.

"How so?" Lori asks. I had a feeling this wasn't going to end well.

"You shouldn't have taken the knife away." Andrea said. I wish one of these days I'd be wrong about shit like this.

"Excuse me?" Lori asks.

"You were wrong, like Dale taking my gun."

"Andrea not this shit again!" I snap at her.

"Let me finish." She said to me before looking back at Lori. "That wasn't your decision."

"But you also have to see that the situations are different Andrea." I say to her. "You weren't just a danger to yourself. Dale would have died with you at the CDC-"

"And he didn't have to if he let me-"

"And you ended up shooting Daryl!" I shout at her.

"That was an accident." She defended herself.

"That wouldn't have happened had you realized you were not ready to hold a gun again." She looks away from me and goes back to talking to Lori, but I can still see how hurt she is.

"She has to choose to live on her own. She has to find her own reasons."

"Want me to tie a noose for her?" Lori retorts as she puts a plate away in the fridge.

"If she's serious, she'll figure out a way." I hated to admit, but I Andrea did have a bit of a point.

"Doesn't mean I can't stop her or let her know that I care." Lori says.

"That has nothing to do with it, Lori. She only has so many choices in front of her, and she believes the best one is suicide."

"She's actually right about that Lori. In her mind that's the only way out of all this."

"That's not an option." Lori says.

"Of course it is." Andrea said. "She doesn't need to be yelled at or treated like a child."

"She needs a loaded gun, right?"

"Lori." I warn her in a sharp tone.

"What, you agree with her?" she asks me.

"I can understand her point of view. I understand both of yours actually, but all that matters is what's best for Beth."

"I agree." Lori says. "You'll understand if I don't send you in there." She says to Andrea.

"I came through it." Andrea said.

"And became such a productive member of the group." Lori said sarcastically. I rolled my eyes, at that but a part of me did mentally snicker in agreement. "Let Maggie handle this her way."

"I contribute." Andrea says defensively. "I help keep this place safe."

"The men can handle this on their own. They don't need your help." she says. Excuse me? The men can handle this on their own? Is she implying what I think she's implying?

"I'm sorry. What would you have me do?"

"Oh, there's plenty of work to go around."

"Guys, this isn't the time for that!" I say to them but they ignore me.

"Are you serious?" Andrea asks astounded. "Everything falls apart, you're in my face over skipping laundry?"

"Puts a burden on the rest of us, on me and Carol and sometimes Natalie-"

"Hey, I do my part, but I also want to help keep this place safe." I say through gritted teeth.

"-and Patricia and Maggie." She says, ignoring what I said. "Cooking, cleaning and caring for Beth. And you- you don't care about anyone but yourself-You sit up on that RV, working on your tan with a shotgun in your lap." Damn!

"No, I am on watch against walkers." Andrea says. "So is Natalie when she can. That is what matters, not fresh mint leaves in the lemonade.

"And we are providing stability. We are trying to create a life worth living."

"Are you kidding me?"

"Last time I checked we weren't living in the 1950's Lori. Women can contribute to protecting and it wouldn't kill a man to help provide stability." I said losing control of my anger.

"Look, I went after Rick." Lori said. "I took down two walkers.-

"After crashing Maggie's car." Andrea interrupted her.

"Don't act like you're the only one who can take care of herself."

"-Ever apologize for that?" Lori stopped talking to think for a minute.

"Crashing her-You're insane."

"No, you are. And you're the one that's self-centered, the way you take it all for granted."

"My husband is out there for the hundredth time. My son was shot .Don't you dare tell me I take this for granted."

"You don't get it, do you?" Andrea said. "Your husband came back from the dead, your son too. And now you've got a baby on the way. The rest of us have piled up our losses-Me, Carol, Natalie, Beth- but you just keep on keeping on."

"We have all suffered."

"Playing house, acting like the queen bee, laying down rules for everybody but yourself. You know what? Go ahead. Go in there and tell that little girl that everything's gonna be okay, just like it is for you. She'll get a husband, a son, baby… boyfriend." Lori slowly looked at her and gave her a death glare.

"She just has to look on the bright side." Andrea storms off and me Lori just stand there in silence. I go to leave as well, but not before getting something off my chest.

"We may have all suffered, but you don't seem to fight to stop suffering."

"I-"

"Let me finish. Yes, your husband and son almost died and your husband risks his life every day, but that doesn't mean you have to sit back and watch. My father died and I know I couldn't do anything to help him or protect myself from what would happen after that. I have been raised by multiple jackasses and their wives who tried to tell me that it was my job to enforce the stability you want. But the thing was they couldn't provide the safety I needed so that all I had to worry about was stability. A good amount of them only cared about the check they got for taking care of me and used it on their alcohol addiction or take care of themselves who they considered real family. But you know what, that was okay. Because it taught me that I needed to take care of myself, I needed to be able to fight for those I hold dear me and protect them when no one else can or will. So if you want to really help it's about more than just providing stability, you have to be able to do what you can to fix things. Not just depend on other people to help you get through it." I leave the kitchen and go outside to clear my head.


	39. Chapter 38 part 2 (The Promise)

**A/N: I know its been a while. A lot of you are probably surprised to have gotten an update or see this again. To all of you who have been following this story for a while I would like to apologize for the wait. Life got in the way. Work, family and... writers block. I hate to admit but I got a huge writers block for this story. There were times where I felt like I should call it quits, where I felt like I failed you guys and failed my OC for not being able to write her story and do it justice. Its not that I gave up completely on her, its just that my mind has a hard time writing a story in chronological order. it jumps back and forth randomly creating plots, lines and characters. Sometimes i'm in season 3 or season 5 or 6 (but those sometimes die when a new episode changes everything.) when I should still be in season 2. Other times I get ideas for other stories that I want to write but I feel guilty because I still have this one that's yet to be finished. And I've seen the ending for this and it's beautiful, heartfelt, and everything I've wanted. So I just want you to know I'm not giving up on this story. So I want to prove it to you with this chapter. It's not exactly finished but it's good enough until I can finish the last couple paragraphs. I felt like I owed to all of you that I'm not giving up. **

**Warning: this deals with the topic of suicide. I'm sorry if this offends or it affects you personally. I don't mean to offend anyone or upset anyone, this chapter was very hard for me to write as well. I had to dig deep into my mind and try to picture what it would be like to feel like that. It scared me, depressed me, I think I even cried. I was actually close to tears while editing this, it probably didn't help what song I was listening too. But besides that if this is a sensitive topic to you tread lightly, or you can even PM to talk about if you or a loved one is experiencing it. No one should have to face this alone. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own The Walking Dead in any form and all of the characters and their content belong to their original creators. yada yada yada. **

**Recommended song: Mountains- Message to Bears (I feel in love with a game called Life is Strange and their soundtrack. I actually bought a lot of the songs for my ipod. This song really moves me, my eyes are still watering from when I listened to this when I read a certain scene in this chapter.) watch?v=qlKhWkKpMEU**

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The blazing sun blinds me as I swing the front door open. I can barely see where I'm going because of the glare that's overpowering my eyes, I had to stop at the first step and sit down to avoid falling off of them. The sounds of Maggie and Beth fighting were getting softer but I could still hear them. Without my MP3 player with me (Rick wanted to borrow it for some reason) I had to endure it.

"You're crazy if you think I'm going to let you do that, I won't let you!"

My nails dig into the fabric of my jeans, those words sounded so familiar.

"_No! No! No!"_

I can still remember parts of that day, most of it felt like a blur though. I just see flashes of a that crappy apartment in Atlanta, someone with dark hair sobbing curled up in a corner, and a bottle of pills lying scattered on the floor. I can hear cries of horror and screams.

"Oh god!"

"Natalie-"

"No! No! Don't do this to me! Please-"

"I'm sorry…" I whisper to myself. "I'm sorry."

"What the hell's going on?" my snaps back in shock at the shout. I look up to see Daryl walking up to the house. "Could hear all the yelling practically from a mile away."

"Beth she… she had a knife. Lori found it and took it away." He was silent for a moment, he was probably observing me and saw how distressed I looked. Then he turns around and tries to walk back toward his camp. A wave of frustration radiated through my body and I got up and ran after him.

"That's it? I just told you someone attempted to kill themselves and you just walk away?" I ask him.

"She's still alive ain't she?" he asked, turning around to face me. "I thought a walker somehow got in till I got closer to the house, and now you're telling me all that shouting and Andrea storming out of there with her panties in a bunch is because that little farmer's daughter-"

"Andrea and I also had a disagreement with Lori!" I interrupted him before he could say anything to upset me. "Everyone's debating about the best way to approach this for Beth's sake. Andrea thinks Beth has the right to choose suicide and Lori thinks we should baby Beth and keep a close eye on her."

"Yeah, and what do you think?

"I think… I think if I don't get away from here to clear my head, I'm going to tear both of them a new asshole."

He lets out a huff and takes out a cigarette, putting it between his lips and lighting it with his lighter.

"C'mon." he says, walking towards his camp and motioning for me to follow him. He takes a seat by the unlit fire pit taking out another cigarette and offering it to me as I sat down adjacent to him.

"Not that desperate for one yet." I spot a flask on the ground beside me and pick it up. "But this will do."

"Just don't drink it all!" he says. "Hard to find good whiskey now a days and I don't want it wasted over a girl crying for attention."

"That's not what happened. People who want attention tell you they're thinking about it, those that mean it just do it. Like Beth and-." I stop myself from talking. Taking another sip to hide the fact that I had more to say.

"And?" he asked. Damn it.

"… We've all got a past Dixon."

"Wait, you're telling me you-"

"Thought of it one time. Everything in my life was just going downhill so I figured I had nothing left."

"But you're still here."

"Something happened that stopped me. Made me realize that it wasn't the way." He hands me the flask and I take it from him. Taking a long drink before handing it back to him. We just sit there in silence for a while. It gave me time to clear my head. Made me realize what I needed to about the whole situation with Beth, what I could do to try to help her.

"I'm heading back. You should come too." He mutters something and acts like he's adjusting his crossbow. I couldn't quite make out what he said but I knew it wasn't pleasant.

"Hey," I said. "I know things have been tough lately, tougher than anything I've experienced, but I think I gave you enough time to sulk out here on your own."

"If you're trying to get me to come with you, you might want to rephrase that." he says angrily getting up.

"You've been distant from everything and everyone for days! Hell, sometimes we would be worried that you died out here all along until you would light your campfire at night.

"Oh yeah? Who was worried? The good ol' sheriff? His wife Olive oil? How about that asshole Shane?"

"Carol was worried about you! And so was I!"

"I'm fine! I don't know why you would think that."

"Because you haven't spoken to me since that night. I was afraid I scared you away, that I ruined whatever friendship we had between us because-" I stumble on my words, I didn't know what to say next because I couldn't understand it myself. I acted rash by running off, I put us in danger because of those men, but I knew that wasn't what might have ruined everything. It was because of that one impulsive kiss that I can't even begin to understand what it meant, and what it could mean if I let it affect us.

"Look, I know what finding Sophia meant to you. It wasn't just about bringing her back safely, that may have been the main reason, but it was also so you could feel like you have a purpose here." he turned his head away from me. "I realized that when you showed Carol those Cherokee Roses at the pond, when you said you had nothing else to do. But you do belong here. You've proven that over and over again. So don't drive us away, we need you Daryl. All of us."

I need you.

I turn back to head to the house.

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_I once wanted to die. Actually, I'm not even sure it was that I wanted to die, but more like I couldn't picture living anymore. I had no purpose. I had those thoughts since my family died, but one day it all just felt like too much. Like I was glass that was ready to shatter into pieces._

_It was a little while after I moved to Atlanta. I was in a fragile state. My depression was consuming my mind, the wall I put up to protect myself broke down like a damn that couldn't hold back the heavy flow of pain and guilt that I felt. I blamed myself for me and my sister living in poverty with no family ties. If I never had gotten hurt my mom never would have taken her life. I even thought that if I died instead of my mom they would have had a better life. But instead I was the one to live. And for what? I was just a young unemployed woman wandering aimlessly through life. I was nothing special, nothing that was worth my mother losing life for or worth my sister having to watch her mother take her life in front of her eyes. A burden that she carried with her ever since and made her lose her way. All because I lived a life I didn't feel was worth living. So I figured if there was no purpose for me to live why not just end it?_

_I went to the drugstore to refill my prescription. I was planning to take the whole bottle and fall asleep. Reese was supposed to be working the late shift at the bar so I figured I had plenty of time to do it. But I decided if it was my last day I was going to live. I went out to a nightclub and just went loose. Became something I thought I never was. Had a couple of drinks, danced like a maniac, even made out with a random guy. When I went home, I thought I was ready. Little did I know though that I wasn't the only one that was ready. My sister got fired that night and came home early. She had a breakdown and found my pills, I walked in and she was curled up in a corner with the empty bottle in her hand. Everything I was feeling, the guilt, the emptiness, and the acceptance of the end vanished and was replaced with panic, despair, and anger._

"_Oh god!" I shout as I ran over to her_

"_Natalie-"she rasped, her eyes were half closed and streaming with tears._

"_No! No! Don't do this to me! Please-" I put her arm around my shoulder and pull her up from the floor, dragging her to the bathroom as quickly as I could. Leaning over the toilet I stick my fingers down her throat._

"_Get it out!" I scream as she tries to fight me off. "Get it out now!" Despite her attempts, I end up winning. She leans over the toilet retching. _

"_Nat, stop!" she says once she's done. "Just stop! I-I want to die. Let me die!" _

"_I won't let you!" I wrestle her into the shower, turning the cold water on trying to snap her out of it. She tries to push me away, letting out an anguished scream._

"_Why?" She asks. "Why are you trying to save me?"_

"_Why are you trying to leave me?" I cry out. _

"_Because I knew you would leave me! You didn't want to move here. You had no choice. And I don't blame you. Why would you want to be with me? I abandoned you when you needed me most. I wasn't there to protect you. I only thought about myself."_

"_All I ever wanted was to be with you!" I shouted at her. "I don't want to lose anyone else I love. But I blamed myself for mom. I blame myself for what our lives have become. I tried to fix it, try to overcome it, but it didn't help! I doomed us to this life."_

"_No." she said. "you didn't." She pulled me into her arms and hugged me. _

"_Don't do this again." I beg her._

"_I won't so long as you don't try."_

"_I promise." I say. "I want to keep fighting for us, for a better day."_

_I clung to her as tight as I could and we just sat there, under the heavy downpour of the shower. For the first time in a while I felt alive and hopeful. Something I wouldn't have if I ended it like I wanted to._

Like waking up from a dream I find myself in Beth's room again. Sitting on her bed, I almost forgot that I was telling her a memory instead of actually living it. I didn't notice I was crying until a tear fell on Beth's comforter. I should have expected to cry, I haven't told anyone that story before, I blocked it out of my mind for so long trying to forget it happened.

"Sorry." I say to Beth wiping my tears. "This probably isn't coming across like I wanted it to. But I just wanted you to know that I understand. It took something drastic for me to realize it wasn't the way. That I wanted to live to see if things get better, if I really can beat the odds and make it. And I feel like you do too."

She just looks off into space blankly. I didn't expect a reaction out of her, I just wanted to try to get through to her. I get up off the bed and head to the door, as I exit to the hallway and close the door. I see tears fall down her face, and hear a light sob as I shut the door.


End file.
